Hollow Shades
*Ribbit*
The fog had lessened.
*Ribbit*
The darkness had not left.
It lingered–heavy and daunting, always a constant reminder of the injuries and the pain sustained. The toad struggled greatly as it placed a slimy leg after the other, refusing to give way for the darkness that had begun to gather at the back of its mind.
It was cold.
*Ribbit*
Even its own croaking sounds could not break through the cold monotony of the forest. Not the wind; nor the birds, or the soft, tender caress of the solar rays could ease its pain–for there were none.
Trapped beneath a thick blanket of merciless foliage; stuck forever; damned to see its only friend be dragged into the shadows for devouring. The toad saw the trees.
No tears fell from its face. No quiet sound of suffering left its throat. Only the soft croaking could be heard; only the increased rate of its blinking eyelids could ever be seen and believed to have been mourning and pain of the likes few should sustain.
It simply croaked as it always had, until a soft *Ribbit* broke through the stillness of the night before the toad stopped moving.
*Crack*
Hoofsteps.
Squishy and fast-paced; moving hurriedly towards our fallen hero. The goo-pony mare slid the rest of the way from the trees and landed next to the unmoving toad.
"Oh no! Please get up!"
The rose-colored pony placed a trembling hoof on our hero's body, trying desperately to ease the toad back to its feet.
"Please, please, please! Oh no! I never meant for this to happen. I didn't know a werepony was following us!"
The toad didn't respond. It simply kept its eyes staring ahead, looking hopelessly in the direction its friend was taken. The goo-pony wept tears full of regret and viscosity, but stopped as realization dawned.
Standing back to her full height, the goo-pony replaced a frightened look for one full of determination.
"I'll help you get your friend back."
The toad twitched.
"And I'll help you get out of Hollow Shades."
*Ribbit*
A tongue shot out from our hero's mouth and planted a long, slimy, sloppy, and very grateful kiss on the goo-pony's cheek. She giggled madly and half-swooned, but managed to regain composure. The blush remained though, making a sizzling sound as some of the goo on her cheeks evaporated.
"Not now! We have to save your friend first, silly!"
The toad was rapidly swept up in a wave of red goo, and both love-slimes rapidly slid down the path in hot pursuit of the werepony and the guardnapped guard.
Into the darkness.
***
"It's a werewolf! To arms! To arms!"
Both of our guard's captors groaned miserably and kept on walking; trying their best to ignore the frantic moving of their captured guard.
"Werewolf!"
The were-pony whimpered and tried to cover its ears with a paw; the goo-pony sighed and morphed its ears into rock-shaped lumps. Both had walked for less than five minutes with the guard prisoner, and they were about to snap.
"Is that... fur? Coming out of your ears?"
They had tried setting him free, but then he'd just attack them; they'd also tried losing him in the thick foliage of the forest, but that was even worse. He would run around the entire place shouting madly that he'd find them, or that 'You can't hide from me'.
In the end they just gave up.
"Wait... I know you."
The were-pony yelped as if physically struck and desperately tried to bury its face inside the goo-pony.
"Hey! What the-!!"
More whining and yelping followed as the terrified were-pony desperately clawed at its companion; trying like mad to get away from the scary chatterbox.
"No! Get out, out, out!"
Our beloved guard had long been released from his bonds, and he now calmly walked alongside his captors.
"Be careful!" Said our hero, eyeing the dangerous frivolities in which his newest acquaintances rejoiced with a wary look. He never did like lollygagging.
"Darn right she should be!"
The goo-pony clung to a tree branch as the were-pony barked and clawed at it, demanding that the slimy one come down from it to serve as her refuge.
Our guard looked on at the odd scene, wondering. His gaze staring off into the nothingness as it normally did; his thoughts piercing time and space as they ought to; his mentality trespassing the barriers of existence itself.
"Gah! She's got my leg!"
"Put that down!"
***
Toad and pony swept through the foliage of the forest, breaking branches and destroying bushes as they went. Like an unstoppable tsunami they went, and their passage was marked by the gooey trail left behind their wake.
*Ribbit*
"I know! We have to catch them, but I can't go any faster!"
Our brave toad of valor heard this and doubted. In one swift motion, the toad turned around so that he was facing the goo-pony's rear and jumped.
"Gah!"
The resulting impact caused the mare to yelp as the toad did the toad equivalent of spurring a horse onward, and our heroes were propelled faster and farther into the woods.
Needless to say, it was quite a surprise when they were met with a horde of undead.
Our brave toad warrior emerged from the goo-pony's butt, where he had become stuck after his valiant effort to accelerate the speed of their journey. His toady eyes gazed ahead at the undead, that his mare companion had not noticed yet, as she had been to busy panting and blushing with her eyes closed for some reason.
No matter! Our rating and setting does not allow for much more than that insinuation anyway, therefore, onwards!
The brave toad warrior jumped from the mare's butt and landed on her head, his little toad legs sticking into her gooey mane and providing a steadfast grip.
*Ribbit!*
He croaked, and the mare woke from her reverie.
"Gah! What in the horseshoe is that?!"
She shrieked and planted her hooves into the ground, causing both of our heroes to skid to a very slippery and perilous stop. Toad and mare screamed - or did the amphibious equivalent of screaming, which is very similar to a chicken's burp - as the zombie ponies turned their heads to look at them.
"We're gonna die!"
*Ribbit*
***
*whistles* "That is one... big hammer."
"What the-! I'm trying to pee!"
"What do you aim to do with that hammer, friend? Knock down a house?"
"Stop looking at it! No! Don't touch it!"
An angered stallion shouted from behind a tree, as our hero - the beloved guard of strength and might - rummaged through his toolbox. He had found a really nice hammer, and he was admiring it with indifference few could master.
This, for some reason, angered the stallion.
"No! Bad monster, bad! Put it back!"
Shouted the stallion as he zipped up his pants and angrily stomped his way to our hero. His fur was a yellow-green color, and his mane was deep brown. He stomped his way with great noise as his hands he waved with alarum.
It is not everyday that one would meet an anthropomorphic pony.
Off to the side of the tree were the scene unfolded, were the were-pony and the goo pony from before. Both were sitting under the cover of a dead oak tree, looking at the confrontation.
The were-pony growled something at the anthro pony, and the goo-pony translated.
"Yo, Nini. Bonny's saying to hurry it up! She hungry bro, but she no can eat nothin' if you don't open it up that tin can."
Bonny, the were-pony, growled again and bared her fangs, one of which was slightly chipped. Our hero's helmet had a corresponding dent on the side too.
"I'm trying, Lime, but he doesn't stay still... Where'd you find this guy anyway? He's fidgety."
Nini, the anthro pony, made a face and grabbed a wrench.
"Alright, dude. Just stay still..."
Nini neared our hero and placed his hand on his shoulder, trying to bring the wrench to his helmet. Sadly for him...
"I find your hand in my pocket, I'm going to cut it off."
...our hero disagreed.
Nini yelped and drew his hand back faster than a rabbit runs from a fox, his brow covered in sweat. His voice a squeaky little thing, he mumbled an apology and backed away.
Bonny growled. Lime, the goo-pony, sneered, and Nini squeed as ponies do.
It seemed like Nini was about to be scolded, but then...
"Wait... I know you!"
Bonny whimpered and backed away. Lime winced, and Nini gasped.
"It's a werewolf! To arms! To arms!"
Screams of desperation filled the night.
Yeah! Got feature!
i44.tinypic.com/vqoe8n.jpg
Yes! Moar monster ponies!
It's been a while since this got updated eh?
In unrelated news my eyebrows finally grew back.
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Yup. Monsta ponis are best ponis.
Glad to hear that too btw eyebrows are an important source of power.
2804833 143 unread fav? you need to read
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it used to be over two hundred, but I trimmed it down.
I didn't expect an update, but I found the feature board practically bitch-slapping me in the face.
I think goo pony might have just gotten bumped to be my favourite pony this story.
I have never laughed so hard in my life...
This story is fucking hilarious! You need to write it more often.
Will there be curved swords?
Curved. Swords.
I lost track... of everything.
2805559
I have a slightly bent plastic knife from when I tried to break it with my mind, I sat on it, you can have it if you want...
These ponies believe them to be all lawless beasts. He's proof of their ignorance.
Lolololololol!
holy shit update
fuck yes
Dat part with the goo pony mare and the frog...
Suffice to say, I have a new OTP.
The guards favorite past time, torturing those around them with repetitive dialogue. Those poor bastards didn't know what they were getting into.
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I know.
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Thanks!
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Thanks!
2805488
Yup. I'll try, but I can't promise much. But I'll try.
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Meibi.
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Whatever do you mean?
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I think I know how to use that.
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GooToad 4 life!
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Indeed. Now they must pay the price.
If our fine heroic figure is this eloquent at 2.5 speech. . . How masterful would he be at 3.0?!
I tucking lost it at the hammer part
Great story :)
The mellow dramatics from the frog and other characters really set the mood for the misinterpreting shenanigans of the guard. The rest is just the cherry on top :D
all throughout the story I'm like but then I'm like and I keep coming back for more!
ermegerhd! erdert!
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whiterun guard is best guard. update please
this is the best fanfic ever and i won't more of it
mmmmm dat goopony
I am loving this story, yesh
Super relevant comic.
i.imgur.com/RfoDGa1.jpg
2980406 you sir have made my day
3005494 You're welcome.
Sorry, but I have to do this, or its just gonna bug me.
*You, sir, have made my day.
3005523 hit spacebar instead of commas, lol.
Whiterun Guard #34 should meet Lyra.
Because humans.
Something with Al, then this? I am... Happy. I am... HAPPY MURLOC!!!!
3108608
YES!!!
Then he should traverse to Canterlot and pester blueblood.
Why you have to go and git choself banned massa?
In truth I didn't know it was possible, I mean with all the crazy word porn they got on here it sounds a little hypocritical to ban someone. Granted I have no idea what you did, but still.
So, how goes the story? Not to rush. Just checkin'!
Guard > Slime, Werewolf, & Anthro.
This is a masterpiece...
At the end of all this, the guard must become the ruler of Equestria.
The legend says... The guard's still walking around Equestria about 1000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 years, and the number keeps coming.
I lost it at this, hahahaha! XD
I'm waiting for the guard to say "I used to be an adventurer, then I took an arrow to the knee." to one of the princesses and they launch a full scale investigation, finding in a distant town on the edge of Equestria an unscrupulous doctor has been working with a local bandit where the bandit would shoot travelers in the leg, the doctor would perform surgery on them and split the bits with the bandit.
This whole chapter was so dirty-
Kinky.
🐉❤