• Published 18th Nov 2012
  • 12,945 Views, 616 Comments

What Choice Do I Have? - chaos2012



Twilight is destined to be the one to destroy Equestria, and she will do anything to stop herself

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What will she think?

Bouncing along the metal tracks, the train traveled up the windy path of the mountain to its destination. Snaking its way on the side of the steep face, it eventually came to a long tunnel that passed directly through the center of the massive stone interior of the mountain. The bright headlight of the train illuminated the dark pathway before opening up to the bright afternoon sunlight at the other side.

As soon as the train passed through the end of the tunnel and outside of the mountain, the great city of Canterlot came into view for all those on board. Happy cheers came from many of the fillies seeing the Giant castle. The many adults also gave small cheers as they saw they were nearing their destination.

All were excited, except for one.
Twilight stared out the square window at the approaching capital in the distance. Small beads of sweat began forming on her forehead as her heart rate steadily increased out of a mix of different fears and worries that were building inside of her. Every cell inside of her brain was spinning as she contemplated how to tell the princess of everything that has happened to her.
"What will the princess think if I asked her about that book that I found in the library?" she said to herself, "Why didn't she ever tell me about the things that were listed in there?"

Her eyes then floated over to the bag that she brought along with her. Opening it up, she pulled out the strange book that she had discovered inside the library. Before flipping the cover open, she glanced around to see if other ponies were near her, but forgot she was in her own personal car. Being a student of the princess granted her certain privileges and services in things, which at the moment she was very thankful for; she wanted to be alone for as long as she could.

Flipping the book open, she immediately turned to the section on Crimson Flames and stared at the picture of him. Her eyes focused on the bright flickering flames that replaced the normal mane and tail. Then she gazed at the red eyes that glared to some unknown target that it was looking at. Her mind sputtered, replaying just some of the many disturbing visions that she had been experiencing for the last few weeks.

Twilight began breathing faster as she watched herself as that... Other form walking steady behind a large mass of screaming ponies, the fire around her racing after the terrified and helpless victims. The cries of agony and horror rang through her subconscious as the flames engulfed the many ponies, slowly burning them to cinders.

"No!" Twilight screamed as she through the book across the cart. The small tome smacked against the wall opposite of where she was sitting, falling down to the ground. As if by some twist of fate against her, the book fell open, still on that horrible image looking right back at her. She glared and used her magic to lift it in the air. She had all of the urge to just use her power and shred the book right there, but she somehow stopped herself from doing it.

Taking several deep breaths, her nerves began to settle down. Levitating the book over, she slipped it back inside of her bag and closed it up. She wanted to try and calm herself before getting to Canterlot. She was also very thirsty. One thing came to mind. Pulling down on the service string above her head, signaling the train attendant. About a minute later, a cream colored earth pony came in, wearing the standard blue overall attire worn by the train workers. "You called for assistance?" the young mare asked.

Twilight nodded in the ponies direction, "Yes, can I have a drink please? Something alcoholic. Strong."

The Attendant gave a questionable look, "Ma'm, we will be arriving in Canterlot shortly. Are you sure that you don't want to just wait until we get there? There is a nice bar right next to the-"

"Please. I just... Need something." Twilight interjected.

The young attendant decided to hold her tongue and go get a beverage for Twilight. Being the personal student of the princess also meant that many ponies who knew her ranking didn't want to upset her in any way.

Watching the pony walk away, Twilight then turned her gaze back to the view outside of the train. The large sun in the sky was beginning its slow descent on the horizon towards the ground, giving a beautiful orange glow across the sky. The sight was certainly spectacular to admire, giving a warm feeling throughout Twilight for a moment. The touching moment was short lived, however, as she suddenly felt the train begin to slow its speed down, the brakes caused a strong vibration throughout the carts. Looking towards the front of the train, she saw the approaching station.

Twilight's mind began to race again, seeing that she was now so close to having to talk to Celestia. Her legs suddenly felt like butter, shaking as she listened to the constant screeching from the brakes beneath her cart. Now that she was actually arriving in Canterlot, she wasn't so sure that coming to talk to the princess was such a good idea. 'She will think I'm just a monster.' she thought to herself, 'There is no way that she will think understand. I am just a freak and-"

"Miss Sparkle?"

Twilight jumped up at the sound of her name. "Huh, what?" she flipped around to see the young attendant carrying a small glass of what seemed like wine. The mare stared at her curiously for a moment before lifting the glass up. "I... I brought the drink that you asked for. It was all that we have at the moment."

"N-no its fine." Twilight quickly responded. Grabbing the glass with her magic, she quickly brought it up to her mouth and gulped it down in seconds. She coughed from the strong alcohol that gave a slight burn in her throat from drinking it so quickly, but she didn't care. She levitated the now empty glass back to the stunned worker. "Thanks."

The attendant stared at Twilight for a moment before turning around and walking out of the door to the front of the cart. Twilight then felt the train come to its complete stop at the station. Steeling herself to face the princess, she stood up from her seat and hopped onto the ground. Grabbing the bag she had, she slipped it over her shoulder and walked towards the main door of her cart that led to the station on the other side.

Ever so slowly, Twilight reached out and pushed the train door open, allowing the slightly chilled air to flow into the open doorway. Stepping outside, the bustling train made her have to weave her way through all of the crowded pockets of ponies that simply stood and chatted with each other. Once she finally got clear of the thick crowd, she stood on the main street of the town that lead directly towards the castle.

Twilight sat in place for what seemed like eternity staring up at the massive home of the princesses that overlooked the city. Even with the drink she had, her heart rate didn't slow down at all. 'I don't know what the princess would say. Heck, what would I tell my mother if-
"Oh my." Twilight whispered to herself. Her parents lived in Canterlot, and in the state she was in, she had no intention on wanting to see them now. Seeing a nearby taxi, she figured that she could get through the town that way without risking the chance of running into some pony she knew. Running up to it, she jumped into the back seat. "Canterlot castle, please." she quickly told the pony hooked to the front. Nodding, the stallion began pulling the wagon down the cobblestone street.

Gift of the strong stallion in front, the wagon ride to the castle only lasted a few minutes. Thankfully Twilight did not see any pony that she knew on the way, although she had hunkered in the back of the cart and hardly saw any pony at all from inside. Coming to a stop outside the main castle gates, the taxi pony glanced back to Twilight, "We are here Ma'am."

"Thank you." Twilight responded as she handed several bits to him. Turning around, she started slowly making her way past the large stone opening in the tall security wall, leading to the massive courtyard in front of the main palace. Looking around, she saw several guards lined along side of the path, watching her intently as she walked. Even though she knew that was just standard for guards to watch everypony, right now it just put her even more on edge.

Continuing on, she eventually was stopped by the large doors that led to the interior of the royal palace. Twilight stood as still as stone for several moments, staring blankly at the golden round door knock that hung in front of her. Taking a few deep breaths, she began to force her heart rate down. 'Alright Twilight, this will all be fine...' she thought to herself, 'She will find out what is wrong with you and fix the problem. You'll be as good as new in no time.'

Reaching up, she put her hoof on the door knock and tapped it several times on the brown door. The sound of the knocking could be heard outside echoing through the large entryway inside the castle. Then, the sounds of hooves walking across marble flooring making THEIR way to the door. Then, the latch inside clicked, followed by the door creaking open. Sure enough, the Princess of the sun herself was one who answered.

"Twilight, it is great to see you again. I'm glad that you made it." Celestia said with a bright smile.
Twilight gave the best false smile that she possible could back to her teacher, "Yes, it is good to be back. I... I was told you wanted to talk about some things."

The princess nodded, "Yes, but perhaps we should have a refreshment. Let us head inside for a cup of tea." turning around, Celestia headed back inside and around the corner.

Twilight slowly stepped inside after Celestia. As she walked, her mind was spinning on how exactly to start out explaining all of the things that were going through her head. 'Should I tell her that I dream of killing everypony that I care about? Should say how for some sick reason I am enjoying all of it in my sleep?'

Trotting down the hallway, both princess and student entered the large dining area. In the center, a massive oak table sat stretched out across the red carpet that was laid below on the ground. Walking up to it, Celestia signaled one of the butlers to come over. "Some tea, please." she pleasantly told him.

Nodding his head, the pony quickly turned around and passed through the swinging doors leading to the kitchen in the back. Once he was gone, Celestia turned her attention back to Twilight. "So, how was the train ride here from Ponyville?" she knew small talk was always the best thing to do before jumping straightforward to what she wanted.

"It was nice. It seemed a little faster than normal. I just relaxed and..." Twilight hesitated for a moment before speaking again, "Just read a... History book."

"Oh, what was the subject matter of history that this book focused on?"

Twilight swallowed the lump that began to form inside of her throat. She contemplated if she should try and evade the book for now, or to just pull out the book and show her. "It, uh, talked about a mix of different things in history. You know, uh, old legends and stuff."

Celestia noticed the small amount of shakiness inside of Twilight's voice as she spoke. 'She's definitely trying to hide something.' she thought to herself, 'Is it from what Spike told me?' before she could speak, however, the butler returned back into the room, balancing a silver tray on his hoof as the small cups sat perfectly still on top. "the tea is ready, your highness ." he politely stated.

Celestia smiled at him as she enshrouded the cups with her magic, lifting them and setting both onto the table. "Thank you." lifting one cup up to her lips, she took a small sip, enjoying the warm drink pass down her throat and settle into her stomach. After a few more sips, she lowered the cup and turned to Twilight, "Wouldn’t you like your tea?"

Twilight shook her head, "No, I'm fine. Thank you."

Celestia nodded before taking another sip. "Now, I wanted to talk to you about what Spike had told me. He says that you have been very troubled lately about something."

Twilight felt the sweat begin to form all over her body. She had dreaded this moment the whole time. 'Should I tell her about the fact that I look like the pony Crimson Flames in the book? Who was he? Why hasn't she ever mentioned him before?’

"Twilight?"

"Huh?" twilight snapped out of her small trance at her name. Looking up, she saw Celestia
staring at her curiously. "Oh, sorry Princess. I.. I just got caught up thinking of something."

Celestia tilted her head owns narrowed her eyes at her student, "You do seem awfully distracted at the moment. What is on your mind that is bothering you?"

Twilight took a deep breath before speaking, "Well, I was doing some reading and I found an interesting pony. What do you know about... Crimson Flames?"

The aura around Celestia's cup vanished instantly, causing the cup to fall to the ground and shatter into tiny fragments. The Princesses eyes were as wide as dinner plates as her skin began to shiver. The butler quickly rushed over to her. "Princess, are you all-

"Leave us." Celestia quickly cut him off. When he didn't react immediately, her voice rose a few dozen decibels, "Now!"

Feeling frightened, the pony made a quick U-turn and hastily exited the room. Seeing the sudden change in emotion from the princess made Twilight feel like she had made the wrong choice in mentioning his name. Celestia blankly stared forward, not focusing on anything in particular. "Wh-where did you hear that name?"

Twilight's mouth hung open for a moment, hesitant to continue talking. Deciding to show instead, she slipped the bag off her shoulder and set it onto the ground. Opening the top, she pulled out the small book and held it in the air, "This is the book that i found in the library."

Celestia turned her head towards the book. Then, a loud gasp escaped her throat when she recognized what it was. Enveloping it in her aura, she ripped the old book from Twilight's grasp and pulled it towards her face as she quickly flipped open the cover. 'I thought all of these books had been destroyed? How could she have found one?' she screamed inside of her head. Skimming the pages, she came up to the page containing the picture of Crimson.

Horrible memories began resurfacing in Celestia's mind as she stared at the image. Sweat began to come up through her fur across her entire body, falling down her body as small tremors and shakes rippled through her. Her wings gave small twitches out of reflex from the increased blood flow spread through her body. She had not experienced this kind of feeling of terror since she watched her sister Luna be consumed into the dark figure Nightmare Moon all those years ago.

Twilight sat still as she stared at the princess, unsure what she should do. She had never seen her act like this before with anything. Not even the return of Discord caused this kind of panic with the princess. Before she could say anything, Celestia slammed the book shut and dropped it on the table next to her. Her eyes were shut tight as her head hung down in front of her. She sat like this for what seemed like minutes before her voice broke the eerie silence. "What do you want to know of him? He died along time ago."

Twilight tilted her head out of confusion, "Wait, died? I... I thought it said he just vanished, it didn't say anything about-

Celestia's eyes snapped open, glaring down at her student."What is your concern with the ancient past, Twilight?"

Twilight crouched down to the ground out of fear from the outburst from the princess. The tone in Celestia's voice was a mix of anger and annoyance blended together and aimed directly for her. Never once in her entire life had she experienced emotions like this from the princess before, and having the emotions focused on her made her all that more uncomfortable in the empty room with her. "I-I was just curious on him, princess. Th-there was just some facts I was curious on in the book that I thought you could answer."

Standing up, Celestia stared at Twilight and watched the small shakes traveling through the magenta body of the young unicorn. Thousands of years of experience gave her the skills to spot a lie through any small nervous twitch on a pony. Her eyes continued their harsh glare at her student as she began trotting in her direction, "Are you going to sit there and lie to me Twilight? You have a reason for asking me about him, so tell me."

Fear began taking over Twilight's body as her teacher walked towards her. She began backpedaling to keep a small distance between herself and the angry alicorn at at her. "Princess, I-I wanna go now."

"What reason do you want to know about Crimson Flames? Why is something that happened all those years of any concern to you? Of all of the other ponies in that book, why are you asking of him?"

"Please, I want to go home now!" Twilight pleaded. She felt herself back into the wall behind her, stopping her from retreating any more. Tears of fear began to form in her eyes as she crouched lower and watched her princess come closer. "I-I don't want to talk about it anymore."

Celestia was now standing over Twilight, her eyes beaming down with anger."I want to know right now, Twilight. For what reason are you not telling me what you troubles are? I know how you are with curiosity and history. If you specifically asked about one particular pony, you have a
reason for it. Why do you want to know about that monster!?"

"BECAUSE I DREAMT I WAS HIM!"

The loud scream of Twilight’s echoed across the room. Celestia flinched back in shock of the outburst. Looking down, she saw the tears now flowed freely from her students eyes as she began revealing everything that she had inside.

"I have had horrible nightmares for weeks that I am a monster, walking through towns and destroying them! I see all of my friends and the ones I care about trying to get away from me, but I kill them! I can't stop watching myself burn city after city in fire and lava, and I can't wake up until there is nothing left. Do you know what the worst part is? In my dream I am enjoying it! No matter what I tried I couldn't stop the nightmares as they got worse.

"I figured that you could probably help me, but I was afraid you would hate me for what I’ve thought of. I tried to find something this morning before I came here about my dreams, and then I found this book and saw what it said about him. When I read what it said he did and then the picture of him, I was terrified that you would think I was just the same."

Celestia sat still in shock not from the tormented state of her student, but of what she had heard. "Twilight, you were having dreams like this before you read about him in the book?"

Twilight used the back of her hoof to wipe out the water that built up in her eyes. "Y-yes. They have been happening for a long time now. Ever since I changed like in the picture I have had weird-"

"Changed!?" Celestia snapped, "What do you mean you changed?"

Taking a deep breath, Twilight began explaining all that had happened to her starting from the events in the swamp with the hydra and Pinkie Pie. She completely spilled every bit of detail that she had been keeping inside of her heart this entire time. She told about the horrible things she saw in the dreams that she had, even how she had even talked to what she thought was her own subconscious self. After about fifteen minutes, she was finished speaking.

The pulse in Celestia's neck began to jump faster as the facts started to like up inside of her mind. Unknown to Twilight, everything that she was saying was all creating a horrible realization in the princesses mind. 'It can't be. I never saw any signs that it was happening.' looking down to her student, her eyes gave an expression of confusion and concern to what she had just discovered. 'I must find out if the prophecy is true.'

"Princess?" Twilight whispered as she still laid prone in her spot, unsure if she should move or not. "What can you do to help me? I can't deal with these dreams anymore."

"I must look into your memories, Twilight." Celestia answered. Twilight's eyes widened when she heard that, but before she could respond, the long white horn rushed forward and touched onto her forehead. In a flash, Celestia had passed through and entered Twilight's mind.

---

Celestia found herself in a dark void surrounded by thousands of pictures, which were in fact the memories of Twilight. While she could not enter dreams as which was the specialty of her sister's power, she could enter another's mind and scroll through all of the past experiences one has gone through in their life.

The images of Twilight's life flashed before the sun goddess like pictures in a magazine as she continued deeper into the mind. Scenes of her laughing with her friends at parties, times of her trotting through the town on normal days. Even the memory of her brother Shining Armor's wedding and the attack of the changelings that same day. Seeing that the time she needed was not here, she continued even deeper.

Since she went inside of her pupils head against her will, the memory in which she wanted to see had to be found manually instead of being aided by the subject. Celestia knew that it was wrong and immoral to ever forcefully memory scan a pony, especially somepony as close as Twilight. Yet despite the things that were wrong and told, she knew Twilight was not going to let her inside of her mind after the tension that had come between them in those sudden few minutes. Most importantly, she had to find out if the time she feared all these years was truly upon her.

After some more grueling searching, Celestia found the memory that she desired. In a brilliant blast of technicolor light, she pulled herself into another Place; the memory itself. Due to her unique magic, the princess was able to view the memory not just from the subjects perspective, but from outside as if she was there herself. 'Please, please be wrong Twilight.' she pleaded to herself.

Celestia found herself on the edge of a large ravine above the brown, bubbling swamp below. Right next to her, she saw Spike, Applejack, Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie all staring ahead. Looking forward, she saw Twilight standing there, her face twisted with confusion and anger.

"Huh? But I... What!?" Twilight screamed out, "The hydra wasn't the doozy? How could it not be the doozy!? What could be doozier than that!?"

"Don't know, by it just wasn't it." Pinkie Pie responded back.

Celestia watched as Twilight’s face contorted with rage as the anger and frustration inside of her shot to a new level. Then, she leapt into the air, and in a bright flash of magic, she shifted to the horrible sight that was just what the princess feared.

Her spirit felt like it was shattered as she stood there in shock staring at the pony she had loved since a filly become exactly what she had feared since that day all those years in the past. "No, how can this all be happening!? Why didn't I ever see it?" needing to get out, she charged her horn and pulled herself out of her student's mind and back to the real world.

---

Twilight stumbled as the princesses magic was Lifted off of her. Her brain felt like it was pulsing with her heartbeat, a side effect from scanning the mind with magic. Once she was able to stand up, she gazed back up to her teacher. Surprisingly, she didn't feel angry that the princess did that to her. In fact,'she was a little afraid now, "Princess, I know what you saw in there."

Celestia didn't respond as she stood there staring at Twilight, her breaths coming in quick and loud through her nostrils.

The look of shock on The princess’s face made Twilight scared what was going to happen now. "I'm sorry that I never told you about what happened that day. I thought that it would just go away and I could forget it. Then all of this stuff starting happening and- Agh!"

The bright blast of magic cut her off as she was slammed into the wall behind her, cracking some of the drywall from the hard impact. Before she could move at all, her body was surrounded by the yellow aura and lifted into the air. She became terrified as she was held there, and then felt herself thrown back and smacked into the wall again, this time holding her against it. Turning her head, her heart dropped when she saw the caster, "Princess?"

Celestia's horn pulsed with bright magic as her eyes glared at her target. Her large wings were flared out and held at sharp angles. Her mouth was pulled back into a tight snarl, revealing her clenched teeth. It was perhaps the most frightening and angry that Twilight had ever seen the princess in her life. "Princess, what are you doing!?"

"No..." Celestia growled through her teeth, "I will not let you destroy my world again! I won't let it happen a second time! I'll make sure you won't have a chance." tilting her head forward, she focused more magic at the tip of her horn directly at Twilight's heart.