Chapter fifteen: Promises
As time went on, Twilight was beginning to feel more productive. She had done many things in the several days that Rainbow Dash had been living with her, and she enjoyed those things as well, adding a bright feeling of satisfaction. And, somehow, she sensed that her blind friend was beginning to feel it too.
The pair had been experimenting with a few things to help Rainbow Dash cope with her sudden disability. Twilight had ordered a few copies of various Daring Do books in braille and, once learning braille herself (that didn’t take very long, mind you), started to teach it to Rainbow Dash. Luckily, the pegasus had picked it up quickly, and was now going to more challenging subjects. She still needed some translation from Twilight from time to time, but overall she was becoming much more fluent, something Twilight was very proud of.
But, it hadn’t been easy, and there seemed to be more bad times than there were good times. Rainbow Dash’s stubborn nature was hard to deal with, and sometimes made Twilight question her judgment on taking the pegasus into her home. Meals were never easy, nor was trying to get her to go out in public. Sometimes Rainbow Dash would make Twilight’s life easy, but it was almost never without a fight.
On another depressing note, the faux-collar that Twilight had bought was always present in the back of her mind, just waiting for another chance to be brought up. But, when she had first asked Rainbow Dash about the collar, it always made her cringe, and force those thoughts back down into the abyss of her subconscious.
“No! I’m NOT wearing…THAT thing, Twilight!”
“Please, Rainbow? I promise that it will help.”
“NO!”
“Why not?”
“What do I look like to you, Twilight? A dog that needs walking every bucking day? I’m not helpless, Twilight, so stop thinking I am!”
The conversation had stopped there, for Twilight was too hesitant to continue it any further.
So, she did what she thought was best. Twilight let the idea go. But, just in case Rainbow MIGHT, by small chance, happen to change her mind, she kept the collar in her drawer. And there it sat, beginning to collect dust.
And there Twilight sat, beginning to feel anxious.
Rainbow Dash had gone to take a shower about twenty minutes ago, and she hadn’t responded to Twilight when she called. But, as she said many times, Rainbow Dash could take care of herself. Still, there were so many things that could go wrong! Rainbow Dash could slip and fall, hurt herself, or even worse! The possibilities nagged at the edges of Twilight’s mind, and she couldn’t bear it any longer. It was almost like having a foal of her own, except with a slight age difference.
She trotted quickly to the bathroom and knocked on the door impatiently.
“Who’s there?” came a raspy voice from behind the closed door.
“It’s Twilight!” she responded. Well, at least Rainbow Dash was okay.
“What do you want?” Rainbow Dash asked, her voice muffled by the drips of water from the shower. “I’m a little busy!”
The unicorn rolled her eyes in annoyance. Rainbow Dash was usually like this.
“Are you all right in there?” she shouted back questioningly. Twilight leaned her ear up against the door to see if she could hear a response better, but, to her surprise, she didn’t hear anything besides the pitter-patter of the shower.
“Umm…” Rainbow Dash mumbled, seemingly struggling to get the words out.
“Do you need any help?” Twilight asked worriedly. Not wanting to wait any longer, she cautiously opened the door, and stepped inside just enough so that she could see the inside of her bathroom. Luckily, the curtain around the shower was closed, and no part of Rainbow Dash could be seen except the silhouette behind the curtain.
“Nope! I’m just fine! No help here!” she said nervously. Her tone sounded strange, but not too unfamiliar to Twilight. “And could you please give me some privacy?”
Twilight’s jaw dropped.
“Privacy? I can’t see you, and you can’t – wait, how did you even know I was in here?” the unicorn asked in disbelief.
“I heard you. Duh.” Even though there was a curtain masking the expression of the pegasus’ face, Twilight didn’t need to see it to know what it was. But, even so, Twilight had taken a lot of care to make sure that she opened the door as silently as possible. It came as a surprise to her that Rainbow Dash could detect that. Then again, she had read that once one sense was lost, the others became more enhanced.
Was that a positive or a negative thing?
She couldn’t tell.
“Oh…well, are you sure you don’t need anything?” she asked once again.
There was a slight pause that went on much too long. Twilight felt something bubble up in her stomach when her friend didn’t answer her. It was anxiousness, yes, but not quite. It was also worry too, as well as just a small bit of…she couldn’t describe it. The feeling was getting to her, and egging her on to make sure that Rainbow Dash was alright, and not let her leave until she had done just that.
“Twilight?” Rainbow Dash’s hesitant voice asked.
“Yes?” she answered, taking a step closer to the shower.
“Can you help me?” The question sounded almost painful, but Twilight could understand why.
The unicorn smiled gently and walked over. Just as she was about to grab the shower curtain with her magic, she made sure that it was okay with her friend. Luckily, albeit reluctantly, Rainbow Dash agreed. Without further ado, she lit up her horn, and the curtain quickly opened, revealing a very wet, and very lost looking Rainbow Dash.
“What do you need help with, Rainbow?” she asked, climbing into the bathtub behind her friend. The water felt nice to her, but she groaned inwardly as her lower body became soaked.
To her surprise, all the pegasus needed help with was washing her wings, saying that she couldn’t reach them. Even though it was a fairly simple task, Twilight thought, Rainbow Dash was having trouble with it. But, that was okay. Twilight was always happy to help a friend, even with the most trivial tasks. Actually, this wasn’t the first time Rainbow Dash had needed help with something like this. So, Twilight was used to it, in a small peculiar way.
She slowly and gingerly picked up the soap with her magic and was just about to touch Rainbow Dash, when the pegasus stopped her.
“What is it?” Twilight asked.
“Can you do it…gently?” Rainbow asked tensely, her muscles becoming rigid. “And can you tell me when you’re going to touch ‘em?”
Twilight raised an eyebrow, but complied. She held the soap just about the wings, and began the countdown requested by the blind pegasus.
“Okay, three…” She moved the soap an inch closer. “Two…” Twilight watched Rainbow Dash brace herself. “One.”
Meanwhile, Rainbow Dash was going crazy on the inside. No matter how many times Twilight had done this, or ever would do this, she just thought it was weird. She didn’t care who was doing it, she didn’t like ponies touching her. Period. It was uncomfortable and awkward, especially when you were dealing with something as sensitive as pegasus wings. But, as Twilight kept massaging the soft appendages with the smooth bar of soap, she began to remember why she seemed to trust the unicorn so much. Twilight knew where to go when it came to her wings, and how hard to push to get her feathers clean enough.
Not to mention as time went on and she became more relaxed, it felt awesome.
She sighed a little too loudly as Twilight cleaned her wings delicately.
“Rainbow Dash, how does that feel?” Twilight asked, not stopping the procedure.
“Feels awesome, Twi,” Rainbow replied placidly.
A small chuckle came from Twilight before Rainbow Dash felt hooves being placed on her back, just below her wings. She let out a small gasp, but that quickly disappeared, and she allowed herself to become relaxed again. For a moment, she thought she would doze off, but there was one thing stopping that from happening.
The water pouring down on her felt hot on her skin, and very unfamiliar. It wasn’t like water that came from clouds at all. This water was condensed, and heavy. She was used to clouds and fresh rainwater, not this stuff. It didn’t feel right to her, but she told herself to deal with it. She had to get used to this being part of her daily routine from now on. No exceptions. But, there were a few good things about it. The water was relaxing, and not to mention hot. It was almost like a blanket, in a sense. A very wet blanket. If she wanted to, she could probably fall asleep right there and then.
Nah. She didn’t feeling like drowning.
Then, Twilight’s voice brought her back to alertness.
“Alright, I think we’re done here,” the unicorn said to her. Twilight’s voice sounded approving. She must have done a good job.
“Thanks a lot, Twi,” Rainbow Dash answered gratefully.
“You’re quite welcome,” Twilight chuckled. She carefully climbed out of the tub and stood just beside it. The droplets on her soaked body dripped onto the floor, and she just noticed that the lower half of her body was soaked from the water in the tub. She could feel herself becoming more and more anxious as she watched Rainbow Dash stand up. Twilight knew that she was being silly. What was she worried about anyway? Well, there were those occasional times when Rainbow Dash slipped and landed flat on her face. Whenever that happened, Twilight’s assistance was needed more often than not. She stood rigid, ready to spring into action if need be.
Her heart almost stopped when Rainbow Dash began slipping.
She pounced forward and steadied the pegasus quickly, grasping her front hooves around the pegasus’ abdomen. Twilight didn’t want to use her magic for this kind of task. She had done that once, and Rainbow Dash had not responded well. Though, Twilight couldn’t exactly blame her sightless friend for that.
Rainbow Dash gasped harshly as the hooves grappled themselves around her, but she was thankful for them. At least she didn’t fall on her face. However, the hooves brought another problem, though. Rainbow Dash was in Twilight’s front legs at the moment. And that was awkward.
Really awkward.
She scrambled back into a standing position, freeing herself from Twilight’s grasp. By the messy movements made by Twilight, Rainbow Dash could tell that the unicorn wasn’t exactly prepared for her hasty exit.
“Uh…so, what’s up?” Rainbow Dash asked, changing the subject quickly.
Twilight took a moment to respond. “Well, nothing at the moment,” she said. “I was just waiting for you to come out of the shower before I started doing anything.”
Rainbow Dash laughed. “Huh. Oh, watch out.”
“Wait, what – ?”
Before Twilight could finish, Rainbow Dash began to shake her body rapidly to dry herself off. It worked, but it also succeeded in getting the excess droplets on the unicorn beside her. Rainbow Dash herself didn’t notice at first, but it became apparent when a low grumble came from beside her.
“Hey, I told you to watch out,” Rainbow Dash shrugged.
A groan resounded from the unicorn.
“It’s fine, Rainbow,” Twilight said. “Can you put your wing over me?” she asked. “We’re just going downstairs.”
Rainbow Dash complied, and just a second after, she heard a small click. Then, Twilight began walking forward ever so slightly. Rainbow Dash began walking as well, and let Twilight lead her to the lower level of the library. It was a rather quiet walk, and not to mention slow. She was tempted to tell her friend to speed it up, but kept her mouth closed. The last thing she needed was for her to break her neck by falling down the stairs.
With Twilight’s minor assistance, the pair walked down the stairs and into…whatever room they just happened to be.
“So, uh…is Spike home?” Rainbow Dash wondered curiously as Twilight walked forward just a bit more.
“Can you take your wing off me please?” Twilight asked. “The couch is just behind you.”
The pegasus’ muzzle twisted in confusion, but as she took a few steps backwards, she found a solid mass behind her, just as Twilight had said. Not thinking of where she might land, she hopped upwards and onto the couch. The couch responded with a satisfying squeak, and she let herself relax into it. Luckily for her, this particular couch just so happened to be her favorite one in the library. Twilight must have figured that out by now. And, they were in the room just by the kitchen, or so Twilight had told her.
“Spike’s out…gem shopping or something,” Twilight finished. A few seconds later, she was sitting beside Rainbow Dash on the cozy couch. “I don’t know, he was in a bit of a hurry.”
“Eh, whatever,” Rainbow Dash shrugged.
“Oh, that reminds me!” Twilight said suddenly.
The shrill exclamation made Rainbow Dash gasp quietly, though Twilight didn’t seem to hear it.
“Remind you of what?” the pegasus asked.
“I came up with an idea a few days ago that I went over with Spike,” Twilight began carefully. “Personally, I think it’s a good idea, but Spike’s a little hesitant towards it. But, I don’t really blame him.”
“Okay. And what is that?” she asked.
“Well, I was thinking of sending him to find the dragon that…well, you know…did that to you,” Twilight said. Her voice was growing…self-conscious, for some reason, but Rainbow Dash barely concentrated on that.
Twilight wanted to do what? Send a poor, little, helpless baby dragon after some big scary dragon that almost did her in? Did this egghead finally crack?
“Wait, wait, wait, what?” she asked incredulously. “You want to send a baby dragon into some really huge dragon’s cave or whatever? I know I’m not one to judge, but that’s really dangerous! And not to mention he’s had SO much luck with dragons before!”
“Yes, I know, but think of it like this,” Twilight pleaded, not giving up just yet, “we can’t just have a huge killing machine running around Equestria! He may hurt other ponies, and magic might not be there to save some of them.”
Despite all of Twilight’s efforts, Rainbow Dash was not seemingly swayed. Getting tired of this, Twilight said with an air of authority, “Look, Spike is much older now than he was when the Dragon Migration happened, and he’s also much more responsible. He can take care of himself out there.”
Rainbow Dash crossed her front legs over her chest stubbornly, but her head was pointing downwards and she had a thoughtful look on her face. She was thinking, and Twilight could tell what exactly she was thinking about. All it would take was just a bit more prompting…
“Rainbow, what’s stopping you?” she asked quietly.
“…I dunno…I’m just worried for the little guy, I guess,” the pegasus explained. She sighed and looked up once more. “This dragon means business, and I don’t want any pony to get as messed up as I was, and, I don’t want Spike to either. And if that happens, and the dragons goes crazy, you won’t be around to save him. If you make him do this, you could lose him, Twilight. I want you to know that.”
Twilight said nothing at first. Of course she knew that. How could she not?
“I know,” she answered. “But I also know that he can succeed at this. You just have to give him a chance.”
Rainbow Dash pursed her lips and leaned her head back against the cushion. She was going to regret this.
Big time.
“Alright, it’s fine with me,” she agreed begrudgingly. “Are you sure he’s okay with this?”
“Yes,” we agreed that I would send the offer to Princess Celestia, and if she approved, then he would be able to go,” Twilight informed. To her displeasure, Rainbow Dash began laughing. “What’s so funny?” she asked.
“You really think the princess is gonna let Spike go?” Rainbow Dash said in between bouts of laughter.
“Hey! Princess Celestia has complete trust in me! Of course she will!” Twilight defended. Though, she was beginning to think that maybe it wasn’t such a good idea after all. But, they had made it to the final stage of the plan, and Twilight would not back out when they had gotten so far. “All I have to do now is send it when Spike gets home.”
“If you say so, Twi,” the pegasus answered, waving her hoof dismissively. “Hey, have you got any new Daring Do’s yet? I just finished the last one last night.”
Twilight blinked in disbelief. “You’re done it already? That was fast.”
“Uh, yeah; it wasn’t that hard to do, ya know,” Rainbow Dash said matter-of-factly. “I mean, I had a teeny bit of trouble with it, but nothing’s too hard for me. But you already knew that.”
“Of course…” Twilight muttered. Getting up from the couch, she began to scour the shelves in search of the next book in the series.
“Which book did you finish?” she called over her shoulder.
“Uhh…Daring Do and The Monkey’s Manor,” Rainbow Dash called back uncertainly.
Ah, the eighth book in the series. Now she just needed to find the ninth book.
After a few more seconds of searching, she found her prize. She plucked in into her magical grasp and flicked through it. Mostly to make sure it was in braille, but if it wasn’t she could just read it out loud. She didn’t think Rainbow Dash would mind that too much. Just as she thought, it was indeed the next one, and it was in braille. Smiling to herself, she trotted back to the couch.
“Here,” she said, dropping the book in Rainbow Dash’s lap.
“That didn’t take too long,” Rainbow Dash commented breezily as Twilight sat down.
“Well, the book was pretty easy to find,” Twilight said as Rainbow Dash put her hoof to the cover and, even though she couldn’t see it, looking down at it. She moved her hoof carefully and slowly along the cover, making sure to feel every character there.
“Daring Do…and the…” she mumbled as she moved her hoof along. “…Serpent’s Scale. Cool. This is the next book in the series, right?”
“Yes,” Twilight nodded. “Even I haven’t read it yet.”
“Well…do you want to read it with me?” Rainbow Dash offered warily, biting her lip.
Twilight’s eyes widened in surprise, and her calm demeanor vanished. Rainbow Dash had never offered something like this before. She usually brought the books up to her room and read them quietly to herself. It was weird to think that Rainbow would want her company. But, why waste a perfectly good offer?
“Okay,” Twilight answered, her voice cracking with the last syllable. “Oh, why don’t I get the one in actual print; it’ll be much easier,” she offered, beginning to stand up.
“Sounds cool,” Rainbow Dash nodded, looking away from the unicorn for a moment to put the book carefully down on the floor.
Twilight had spared them a few moments of looking when she grabbed the right book off the shelf with her magic and brought it over to them. But, as she began, Rainbow Dash yawned and stretched her wing across Twilight’s back in what was most likely a cramp, or something like that. Twilight stopped, and let the cover gather premature dust. It was unfortunate for her that Rainbow Dash noticed this.
“Are you okay, Twi?” she asked, folding her wing neatly onto her back.
She had noticed something. It was rather small, and insignificant, but she berated herself for it anyway. How could she have been so stupid? What had she been thinking when she had ordered that collar? Rainbow Dash was right. The pegasus was not a pet, and the collar would most likely cause more trouble than it was worth. What did she want to do, humiliate Rainbow Dash to the point where she would no longer go outside, or show her face in Ponyville at all?
No.
She couldn’t do that.
“Twilight?” Rainbow Dash echoed.
“Oh, I’m sorry, Rainbow. I was just thinking of something. And, right now I need to go do something. I’ll be right back.” With that, she focused, and teleported up to her room. The first stop she made was the drawer just beside her bed.
Upon opening said drawer, she grasped the collar in her magic and took one last look at it. It was well made, yes, and VERY expensive, but it just wasn’t worth it. And it scared her to think that she had ever thought it was worth all that trouble in the first place.
Without another word, she tossed it in the garbage bin on the other side of the room and walked back downstairs to where Rainbow Dash was waiting for her.
“What were you doing?” the pegasus asked as Twilight sat down and picked up the book.
“…taking care of some business,” she smiled, turning the first few pages over until they hit page number one. “You ready?”
“You bet,” Rainbow Dash responded calmly.
Chuckling, Twilight turned to the first page and began to read. And from beside her, she felt Rainbow Dash wrap her wing around her back once again. Twilight smiled and kept reading.
Ha ha, I LED you all on.
*crickets*
Well, that's what you get for giving me a SHORT LEASH.
*shot*
Also, what the everloving fuck is this?
Whenever I hear I'm like, "What the hell, my skype isn't open."
And one more thing, my grade had to recite a poem in our English class to see who would go through to the school wide competition. Whoever wins that school wide competition will go on to the finals in Toronto or something like that.
Yeah, there's four grade nine classes, and I think only four or five people get picked to go to the school wide thing.
I'm one of them.
I don't like public speaking, but I'm so good at it, so I'm really counterproductive.
UGH.
...Interesting song, there.
Kickass chapter.
Also, the song made me want to check my COLLAR id to see who was trying to chat with me.
Eh
2033183 XD Totally listening to that song now, thanks, thanks a lot... Crap. Now I've got the Fighting Foodons theme song stuck in my head... Or whatever that one show was called.
All of my yes.
pinkie.ponychan.net/chan/files/src/135776358509.jpg
That is all.
Well I still hope that the collar can be used as at least a small plot point later on. Maybe finding it thrown away or something. I dunno. Your story. and it's a good one.
Meh, it would of been entertaining to see the imminent fubar that collar would bring but oh well.......that song......
You you sneeky...
should be stand up.
and drop the second quote here.
And this sentence needs some work.
Like the chapter though. I personally want to see the collar come back, but in some kinky way. But that's me, do what you will.
Excellent chapter. I'm liking what is happening. I'm really liking that Rainbow Dash is starting to warm up and allow the help...as for...um, whatever the fuck that video is...I have no idea. It's slightly disturbing and where the bloody hell did you find that...do I even want to know?
Gratz on the feature!! :3
The title of this fic sounds like some music album Regidar would listen to.
DAhhh
fc06.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2012/162/d/e/twi_bop_by_blackgryph0n-d4s9y6l.gif
Great chapter
I believe you can lose the extra quotation over the yes as Slateblu1 mentioned.
Yay, update!
Daaaawww, more Twidash!
Crap, no Scootaloo chapter! D:
One-sentences done. Okay, how much time had passed? RD learned braille pretty quickly but the way Twi talked about the Spike idea makes it seems like only around 5 days passed, but the way Twi was doign Dash wings seems to tell that more time had passed like over two weeks. Also no word about AJ, Pinkie, Rarity or Shy, which means those didn´t came over the past days or if then they weren´t there for very long nor left a worthy expression to talk/think about. Which is a bit sad cause it seems like they try to avoid RD and also Twi who deals with blind Dash everyday.So i hope onyl 5 days passed and that the others simply didn´t had the time or courage or idea what to do to visit Dash and Twi.
Though Twi and Dash should slowly feel frustrated about their friends absentness.
Loved the shower one, espically Twi´s thoughts and worries were very well made and really IC, same for Dash the way she acted in the bathroom. Liked also the flashbacks/thoughts about the past days living together and that its not so easy and that they sometimes fought about stuff, espically the magic holding one was one of my faves as it explains very well why Twi doesn´t use magic to move Dash around and why Dash prefers to use her wings on Twi to be lead around (which could be seen very close/intimate from an outsider perspective even for a blind pony).
The Spike talk was also interesting, Twi trusts Spike alot more than in the show though i´d love to see her for example having a bad dream about Spike´s mission going wrong and her trying to make it stop but Spike saying that he can do it and that he wants to do something good for RD/Equestria and that Twi should trust him.
Maybe Celestia can use the age spell to make Spike older so that he´s in less danger when he goes on the mission (a little hint if you haven´t already thought of that way cause this way Spike stays Spike but in a body better fit for this mission, also that way Twi can convince Celestia and her friends easier of letting Spike go).
Liked Dash´s caring here. <3
A few things i´d wished you would adress:
Twi´s and Dash`s pets, Tank and Owlolicious are very great parts to insert in this story as Tank could be very helpful for Dash´s mind and feelings. She loves that little guy and he can be of a mental support for her to cuddle with something and be more at ease whenever she feels down.
Which is another thing, Dash´s depressions. She´s blind, even if she tells herself to suck it up, there will be the moments when it comes crashing down to her that she´ll never be the same as she was before, flying was her life, it was her dream, her future. And its taken.
Right now Dash takes it really well, way too well for my taste. Maybe she hides it very well and only open up to those sides once she´s sure she´s alone to not burden Twi cause well, she´s loyal and she dosn´t want to burden Twi with everything and deal with some stuff on her own.
Like fighting her own enemies, depression, sadness and uselessness. It could make a great foundation for a couple RD-only chapters when she faces those thoughts as they torment her as well as chapters in which AJ tries to help RD to come clean with herself about uselessness and Pinkie to fight depression or the Trio Twi/Rarity/Shy to end sadness and replace it with love, friendship and hope to still continue flying, just not the way it ocne used to be.
Scootaloo is also really important, she´s Dash´number one fan and a little sister figure for her too. Dash hates pity and loves to be admired. Her worst fear would be Scoots piting her, stoping to admire her cause she can´t fly/can´t become a Wonderbolt anymore and ofc the most horrible thought that she´ll stop being her little sister. Stupid i know, but very real thoughts for a pony in Dash´s situation.
Its where Twi and Scoots comes into play to create a way to show Dash that Scoots doesn´t pity Dash for being blind, that she still admires her cause she´s Rainbow Dash and cause she continues to life and fight on despite what happend to her and that she´ll never ever will stop being her little sister. Maybe a sleep over much later could provide more in-sight stuff like Dash talking to Twi about some or even allof her fears once Scoots fell asleep and Dash is at her vulnerablest cause of the much emotional stuff (Spike leaving, being able to fly with Twi´s and friends help and Scoots staying with her) leading to a very intimate scene between Twi and Dash (not a kiss, but a close and long hug between the two making their hearts beat in one rythme and their souls connect even deeper than before).
What else?
The flying one ofc and Fluttershy´s trauma as well as the other friends being involved with RD´s recovery and journey to a more independent life (don´t make that too easy please, she wasn´t born blind but should still think of terms of like when she had sight as well as sometimes be confused when waking up from a nap or even going as far as to sometimes believe she had only dreamed all that though that would be really extreme and worrying).
Another thing would be RD´s parents, not sure if that got covered already or not. Given that i forgot it, it might not have been enough/memoriable enough.
Well, i guess that´s that-WAIT!!!
I got it, i remember it! A blind dog or a blind eagle! You know an animal to help Dash walking around on her own, independantly, no longer depending on Twi to get from A to B! And with a Eagle trained to help blind ponies (given from what we saw in the show that is possible as ponies got a whole otehr way to deal with animals as wella s animals being much smarter/human-like than in our world) Dash could even fly on her own! Ofc limited by her eagle but still, she could fly and with the help of the eagle screams and movement land safely too!
Tank can´t do that role cause he´s not the greatest nor safest nor most trained or suited for this task flyer.^^;
But hes the sweetest little tortoise who ever walked over the TV-screen. <3
Oh and yay about the collar being thrown away.
And the adorable reading together (though Dash feels way too calm here, she should move more, have more squirms and aches. In the show she´s flying when the others stands around and talk, she is used to action, to movement, to move, to not stand still. She can do so but not for hours nor for days. Maybe if we see Dash training on her own or with help of Twi (and potential closeness due that for more shipping scenes) then this x hours reading sessions will feel more believeable and real and not only cute and daaawwwable.).
So, that´s it. Glad to see you improve with every chapter. Greetings to your mother for helping out if she still does so. You two rock this story!
why didnt she give the collar to wynona?
2033183 sounds like christmas can-can
Or why did she not just take the collar back to the shop? not very smart or cost effective on Twilie's part lol
2033417
stood is right
2034014 Not in the context of the sentence. As the full sentence is "She could feel herself becoming more and more anxious as she watched Rainbow Dash stood up" Twilight is watching Dash preform and action, and therefor 'stand' should be used. If it instead said, "She could feel herself becoming more and more anxious as Rainbow Dash stood up" then stood would work. "Rainbow Dash stood up" is sentence on it's own, however, in context, it is used as a prepositional phrase.
2033597
cdn.head-fi.org/7/77/7797c0ab_unable-to-process-wall-of-text.jpeg
2034058 should have posted the whole sentence. all i see is the couple letters that you posted. but ok
2034070 Well, not to be rude, but the comment wasn't for you. I posted that so the author could quickly go back, find the error, and fix it. I'm sorry if you didn't understand the context or bother to look in the story to check if I was actually in error or not.
Eh... tossing the collar so soon after pointless reader outrage feels like a bit of a sell-out, Blunder. Hopefully it'll come back up again as a bit of contention or see actual use. I was looking forward to the various character development angles it would bring into play.
Good chapter.
Ummm, dafqu with the song?
2034014
I love when people correct the person who corrected someone. Makes me so happy.
Anyways this was again, adorable, and hit me like a missile to the feels. Keep up the awesome work with this fic!
Some fluff.
Seriously, though, what WAS Twilight thinking with that collar? Was it supposed to be like those white canes blind people use? Because those as just as much about checking the ground in the walking path as it is saying "Excuse me, pardon me, blind person coming through."
Nice chap!
But the concept seems kinda familiar.
Well, what were you thinking about that collar?
"Twi, could you help me?"
Feels, feels everywhere.
2034009
The collar it is a one of a kind custom. I doubt the shop that made it will accept the return.
I wonder what was the whole purpose of the collar? Blind Pegasus aid?
2034058 technicaly stood up could still be right if 'as' is put infront of it. could have been an oversight.
When dash asked for help... My heart ceased to work properly. And thank you so goddamn much for not usin that collar. Too much weird bdsm shit can be associated with that.
2035090 True. That hadn't occurred to me.
Aww, The Collars gone?
....
I suppose its your story. But promise me, please, that it wasnt just because sone of your readers didn't want you too.
Well, I enjoyed this chapter anyway.
2033183 You're a writer, a great one at that, it makes sense that your linguistic skills would be great, hence the great public speaking ability.
As for comments about the story: I'm really glad about what you did with the collar. I don't know if you were going to do that from the start or not, and just added the collar introduction as a jerk-our-chains moment, but either way, I'm glad you had twilight come to her conclusion. It feels much more realistic and better now ESPECIALLY how you had her hold on to it for a while, then have a realization moment and trash it. It would seem consistent with Twilight's personality for her to become so wrapped up in finding an effective solution to helping dash move around, that she would forget about the bigger picture, and temporarily become insensitive to dash's feelings, until later when it "clicks", which I presume is when she got up to throw it away.
Also, another brilliant chapter all around, I might add. The whole thing has been amazing so far. Also, I know a few people have referenced muddy wings thinking you got some inspiration for this chapter from that fic... I don't know whether you did or didn't, and honestly don't care, but might I remind everyone that we, the bronies, nor/mlp/eople, mlp fandom, or whatever we call ourselves these days, we've had a fixation with the pegasis' wings since the very beginning. Muddy wings in itself wasn't exactly original..... sure, the plot was original, just as the plot in this chapter was original, but the plot device (I believe that's what it is) of having another pony preen or clean a pegaus' wings as a means of intimacy... that's old news, and in my humble opinion, is fair game for any fic now.
Also, I can't figure out the plural for pegasus. is it pegasi ? or still pegasus? what about plural and possessive, as in, "pegasis' wings" the wings owned by all the pegasi... feel free to reply to this comment with the correction, if anyone wants to, i'm open to learning.
2033597
@Which is another thing, Dash´s depressions. She´s blind, even if she tells herself to suck it up, there will be the moments when it comes crashing down to her that she´ll never be the same as she was before, flying was her life, it was her dream, her future. And its taken.
Right now Dash takes it really well, way too well for my taste
Maybe it has something to do with Dashie's in-the-moment kind of lifestyle perspective, that combined with her attraction to twilight.... I mean, like maybe she has that "what's done is done" kind of attitude, and she'd much rather spend time with twi and think about things like that than her blindness. I do recall a chapter where RD had some internal reflection time, and she herself included that "when she was focused on becoming a wonderbolt, she didn't have time to think about things like this, now that becoming a wonderbolt is out of the picture, she can afford to spend time looking into these feelings about twilight." I don't know why I used quote marks, probably more for separation of the words than anything, but I know that I didn't even come close to the wording the chapter used... but that was the general idea if i'm not mistaken. Also... WALL-OF-TEXT, but who am I to judge? I wall-of-text too sometimes.
2034990
if it was a custom, they maybe yeah she could not of taken it back, if ti were me though I would try my hardest to get my money back lol
also the collar was for Twilie to lead Dash around easier than her putting her wing around her, that's what I gathered anyway
You're collar puns...they have impressed me. I have no more puns to add to this *claps*
Oh and awesome chapter by the way. You really did have me going for a while there with the collar thing.
The ships are setting sail! HAHAHAHAR!
2029387
2033183 ts1.mm.bing.net/th?id=H.4774316537807676&pid=15.1 have a leash pun.
ts3.mm.bing.net/th?id=H.4571396581754534&pid=15.1 I should know better.
Also good chapter.
Cleaver, get spike out of the way, this ship sets sail
great story, great chapter. Glad the leash didnt happen, it seemed kind of mean.
2033183 the shit have I just watched?
on another note. good chapter.
2035577 I don't care for the reference either. In fact, I'm glad it was used. It's great that someone with real talent is using the concept. All I got from this chapter was a chuckle from the familiarity of the way it was portrayed, along with a grin from the rest of the great writing.
Hello The Rainbow Blunderbolt,
I am a person with a severe vision impairment, not quite blind but pretty close to it. This story of yours really touches me deeply, I just wanted you to know that. I think the way you portray Dash in this situation is just wonderful. I know some people don't think Dash is being depressed enough, but I think you're handling it well. Also your description of how it feels to be blind are pretty accurate from what I understand. The idea of being able to percieve the world better, but somehow feel more detached from it was spot on I think. I just wanted you to know that as a vision impaired person I think your story is truly beautiful, please keep up the good work.
meerkat8472
i guess dashie doesn't know how comfy collars can be, ah well.
dangit why do you have to point out another language Latin wont help in? (or as i SOMETIMES call it, old equestrian, or High Gothic)
Things are developing nicely between Twi and Dash I like it keep up the good work