A gray Dwarf is dropped into an unfamiliar land. And of course, he ends up dragged into its problems when all he wants to do is live in peace and work hard and honestly.
You have gone for the lower end of magical assistance in Earth Ponies, as Big Mac, even before mana augmentation shouldve been able to lift the first hundred kilos of hammer off the ground, and if you can swing a hammer like that, you can kill a knight horse with one hit, never mind turning the knight underneath into a half empty toothpaste tube.
Still, more worldbuilding.
Just, I really hope these bags of holdng aint the classical sort where the CMC ask, what happens when we put all the bags in one at the same time?
“Oi, lass! You gotta be careful where ya land! You coulda really hurt yaself or me!” *he shouted* in annoyance before he dropped the last barrier, but kept the tower shield up. Little did he know that he was addressing one of the two rules of this land. And no one has ever talked to her in such a manner before…
Actually, he is in the right to be upset at her. Celestia came out of nowhere to his underground home, unannounced and uninvited.
Not to mention her reckless landing without proper greetings!?
She ain't no better than Rainbow Dash when she "lands".
If you paid attention to how Zargan explained, the weapon is tailored to the user themself. So no, its not his strength that is the issue. It is literally the magical weapon that is bound to the dwarf saying "Nah bro." xD
Cool, I vaguely remember some in your old stories where they are a love interest of your OC's. ( Excluding that Matrix online story. And Eater of Sin for obvious reasons. )
Normally id be confused on why she showed up but then I remembered he put a hole in one the first chapter and the probably went and tattled like a bitch.
Nah, but the dwarf in question is a gray dwarf, based off the gray dwarf race from D&D. I asked an AI generator to draw a dwarf up for me with a few minor details and that is what I got.
11886695 A character’s accent when quoting their speech is one thing. You’ve got half a dozen sentence fragments, typos, and homophone mixup type spelling errors going on even just in the story description. If that continues into the text (I haven’t started reading yet) then I can see why someone felt it worth commenting. I was actually just reading the comments to decide if this was something I wanted to read or to pass on, because if even the description meant to attract readers is sloppy, the rest might just be too distracting to read comfortably.
It’s not the end of the world, of course. Indeed, one of my favorite fics on this site is basically typo soup, though that had the quite important positive features of being finished and also having multiple finished sequels that were also very popular when I first started reading it. But that is something to consider if you’re interested in looking to improve.
You have gone for the lower end of magical assistance in Earth Ponies, as Big Mac, even before mana augmentation shouldve been able to lift the first hundred kilos of hammer off the ground, and if you can swing a hammer like that, you can kill a knight horse with one hit, never mind turning the knight underneath into a half empty toothpaste tube.
Still, more worldbuilding.
Just, I really hope these bags of holdng aint the classical sort where the CMC ask, what happens when we put all the bags in one at the same time?
Actually, he is in the right to be upset at her. Celestia came out of nowhere to his underground home, unannounced and uninvited.
Not to mention her reckless landing without proper greetings!?
She ain't no better than Rainbow Dash when she "lands".
11886894
If you paid attention to how Zargan explained, the weapon is tailored to the user themself. So no, its not his strength that is the issue. It is literally the magical weapon that is bound to the dwarf saying "Nah bro." xD
11886915
Regardless, I plan to be a little nicer to Sunbutt and Moonbutt this time around xD
11886923
Basically; He's not worthy.
11886924
Cool, I vaguely remember some in your old stories where they are a love interest of your OC's. ( Excluding that Matrix online story. And Eater of Sin for obvious reasons. )
Cock and Bone!I… I’m so sorry I meant to say, “Rock and Stone.”
I need to remember to take my meds.
11886960
I should bonk you for that....but it made me laugh a bit so you get a pass. :p
11886923
Obscure joke time then?
You could say, Big Mac
was Molniered? (Mullered)
Normally id be confused on why she showed up but then I remembered he put a hole in one the first chapter and the probably went and tattled like a bitch.
Is this related to Dwarfs series of books?
great story so far
11887285
Nah, but the dwarf in question is a gray dwarf, based off the gray dwarf race from D&D. I asked an AI generator to draw a dwarf up for me with a few minor details and that is what I got.
11887272
She does realize that those ponies are freaking thieves/trespassers, right?
11886695
A character’s accent when quoting their speech is one thing. You’ve got half a dozen sentence fragments, typos, and homophone mixup type spelling errors going on even just in the story description. If that continues into the text (I haven’t started reading yet) then I can see why someone felt it worth commenting. I was actually just reading the comments to decide if this was something I wanted to read or to pass on, because if even the description meant to attract readers is sloppy, the rest might just be too distracting to read comfortably.
It’s not the end of the world, of course. Indeed, one of my favorite fics on this site is basically typo soup, though that had the quite important positive features of being finished and also having multiple finished sequels that were also very popular when I first started reading it. But that is something to consider if you’re interested in looking to improve.
Seems like folks are really liking this one so far o: