Three Werewolves, a Pony, a Seer and a Skepticist walk into Hogwarts...

by SamuelK28

The Satsuma Situation

Thankfully for Limestone, Herbology was a lot more peaceful than breakfast as Professor Sprout took them to the Herbology classroom to give them a lesson on the six things all plants need to thrive. She had then spent the free period afterwards in the library with Hermione prepping for Wednesday’s lesson on the consequences of using magic on plants, both positive and negative.

She caught up with her dormmates again outside the Great Hall at morning break.

“Hey Limey, where you been?” Susan pounced.

“In the library with Hermione. Yourselves?”

“Seriously? I thought she still hates our guts over the whole Lavender abandoning her thing,” Susan said bluntly.

“Oh, she does. But it was nice to have a bit of peace and quiet for five minutes to think when doing my homework,” Limestone explained.

Susan chuckled. “True that. The storm finally passed and Scoti was desperate for a ride on her broomstick. We went out with her with the intention of taking in some fresh air whilst doing our Herbology homework and ended up engrossed by Scoti’s flying for most of the period.”

“Point proven,” Limestone stated matter-of-factly.

“To be fair, it was worth it for such an exhilarating bit of stunt flying. And we were only watching!” Leanne informed her friend.

“Try using that as an excuse on Wednesday afternoon,” Limestone retorted.

“Still have plenty of time to get it done as long as some people don’t distract us in future. What are you do…”

“Fetch,” Limestone said mercilessly as she picked a satsuma out of a bowl of fruit placed on the Hufflepuff table and threw it to the far end of the Great Hall.

Leanne looked at Limestone unimpressed. “You really think that was going to…”

“BALL!” Susan exclaimed racing after the satsuma.

Leanne closed her eyes. “Dammit,” she muttered under her breath before cannoning after Susan.

Limestone smiled wickedly. “Yeah, good luck with that.” She paused and turned to the last of her new found werewolf friends. “Didn’t fancy joining them, Lavender?”

“Huh, what’s that?”

“Never mind. Let me guess, nervous about Trans…” she paused upon hearing a mighty crash at the far end of the hall.

Lavender didn’t need to hear the last part of the sentence to know what Limestone was talking about. “Is it that obvious?” she replied paying no attention to her two other friends laying waste to the teacher’s table at the far end of the hall for a frigging satsuma.

“Yes, yes it is. You know I’m not much of a talker but considering those two have fleas for brains and Scoti’s an absolute lunatic with the common sense of a two-year-old.” Limestone stepped back and pulled Lavender with her as Scoti raced by atop Teeth with the satsuma in her hand, Leanne and Susan in hot pursuit. “Point proven. I guess what I am saying is, the most sane and sensible friend you can talk to is a talking anthropomorphic pony. In other words, welcome to the insane asylum.” Limestone gave her friend a smirk.

Lavender stared at Limestone in stunned silence and then broke down in fits of giggles. “That was horrific,” she managed too eventually eek out.

“But true.”

A loud crash echoed from just outside the Great Hall.

Lavender grimaced. “That’s almost certainly going to hurt.”

“I honestly doubt it. Probably racing up to Transfiguration as we speak and giving old Mrs Miser yet another reason to hate us,” Limestone replied flatly.

“Oh, most definitely. You know Professor Sprout tried to take me to afternoon tea with McGonacow on Saturday.”

“And how did that go?”

“I joined Susan and Scoti in the greenhouses instead,” Lavender said curtly. “The only time I would like to see her again is on a full moon. Sadly, that is not an option.”

“Unfortunately not. I suppose I can at least understand the reasoning behind her actions unlike Snape but her behaviour towards you has been out of order,” Limestone stated momentarily pausing to take a bite out of an apple.

“Thanks for your support. Means a lot. It feels like my whole life I have just been trying to prove people wrong and then when I finally got the chance to come here, I just thought things would be different and everyone would be more accepting, which, for the most part, they have been. I understand that lycanthropy is difficult for everyone to deal with and I get it that people are afraid but like McGonacow they don’t take a moment to think about how I feel. A terrified little girl who fears every month will be the one she finally kills someone and ends up locked away in Azkaban through no fault of her own. For the first time in my life these past few days I have felt like a normal girl and that I have found my place with a group of friends who accept me for who I am rather than what I am. I-I don’t want to lose that Limey,” Lavender finished as her lips quivered and tears came to her eyes.

“Ah hell,” Limestone exclaimed before throwing her apple on the table and wrapping her arms around Lavender.

Lavender didn’t need a second invitation. She pressed her head into Limestone’s chest and wept.

Limestone had little clue what to do next so simply stroked Lavender’s hair gently and let her friend get her emotions out ahead of Transfiguration before uttering softly, “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.”

*

The two girls were halfway up the staircase to the Transfiguration classroom on the first floor when they heard the almighty crash.

Lavender and Limestone looked at one another, both immediately thinking the same thing. They raced up to the top of the staircase and along the corridor to where a crowd of their peers had now formed.

“I knew it. Trouble with a capital T the lot of you,” they heard Professor McGonagall scold.

Gradually the two girls forced their way through the crowd and into the classroom. Limestone’s eyes instantly locked onto the shattered window and then onto two of her friends grappling on the floor, correction, a former desk that now littered the floor. Limestone did not get a chance to assess the situation further as a judgemental voice addressed her from the direction of the front of the classroom.

“Ah, good. Will you two see to your unruly friends please so that we may start the lesson?” Professor McGonagall said with a disapproving scowl to match the tone of her voice. “I think they have already caused enough damage for one day but don’t seem willing to listen to me despite having already lost Hufflepuff thirty points for their actions.”

Limestone rolled her eyes and trotted over to her two wrestling friends. It was only up close that she realised it was Leanne, and not Susan as she had initially thought, who was grappling with Scoti.

“Leanne?” she uttered a touch surprised as she yanked the half wolf girl off Scoti. “Then where’s Susan?”

“She threw her out the window!” Leanne stated angrily.

That’s not true! She jumped out of her own accord, Scoti claimed, now sporting two black eyes, and looking like a panda bear.

“After you deliberately dangled that blasted satsuma in front of her,” Leanne argued, trying, and failing, to wrestle herself out of Limestone’s iron grip.

“You didn’t,” Lavender exclaimed cupping a hand over her mouth to stifle a giggle. “She’s going to be so pissed.”

“Miss Brown, language,” Professor McGonagall admonished. “Or would you like me to deduct more points from Hufflepuff.”

The group of friends ignored their teacher’s remarks.

“And she slammed me through a desk,” Leanne continued to argue.

After you leapt at me!

“After you threw Susan out the window!”

“ENOUGH!” Limestone cried exasperated. “Next thing you will be saying is it was my fault for throwing that blasted satsuma in the first place.”

“Well, now you mention… Hey what are you…”

Leanne never finished what she was about to say as Limestone lifted her friend out of the first-floor window and dropped her to the ground below.

“There. Now, do you wish to join her to finish your argument?” Limestone asked turning to Scoti, her extremely thin patience pushed beyond breaking point.

Scoti rapidly shook her head, for once unable to muster a sign in reply.

“I thought as much.” Limestone held out her hand expectantly and Scoti deposited the satsuma into it. “Now sit over there before I change my mind,” she added firmly gesturing to a desk.

Scoti hurried away. She would never have admitted it but the wild and deranged look in Limestone’s eyes had unsettled her greatly. Still, she had had her fun and Limestone had even provided her with a bonus at the end of it! Plus, she was certain she could conjure some more mischief during her Transfiguration lesson.

“Miss Pie, while I should not condone such means, thank you for getting your friends under control so that we may start the lesson,” Professor McGonagall praised as she repaired the window and desk with her wand.

Limestone simply nodded in response as she took her seat next to Scoti, something that Scoti was less than happy about. She knew Limestone would be on her in a second if she tried anything!

*

Susan spat out a mouthful of earth as she forced her head out of the shallow grave Teeth had dug, dragged her to and then buried her in.

“Damn mutt,” Susan growled. “When I get out of…” she spluttered as Teeth cocked his leg and sprayed her in the face before waltzing off as something else fell from the sky and landed with a thump nearby. “Leanne? Is that you? Help me would…” she stopped mid-sentence realising it was futile and proceeded to watch helpless as Teeth hurled her best friend into a second shallow grave and began burying her to.

Interestingly, Susan was starting to get a craving for roasted hellhound.

*

My head hurts, Scoti lamented as they left Transfiguration over an hour and a half later.

“You’re not the only one,” Lavender replied looking equally frazzled.

“Don’t look at me! I have no clue what she was going on about,” Limestone exclaimed as both her friends turned towards her for assistance. “I got about as far as transfiguration has its own language and then I was lost. I think I am definitely going to need to join Scoti in the remedial class after Flying today,” Limestone admitted whilst staring at the several sheets of squiggles Professor McGonagall had given, and expected, them to decipher by next Monday’s lesson. Simply looking at it was giving her a headache.

“Same,” Lavender grumbled. “Personally, I think she gets a sick thrill from subjecting children to unorthodox torture.”

“That wouldn’t surprise me in the slightest.”

Can we just forget that ever happened for a short while and enjoy our lunch? Scoti interjected testily.

“I think you are forgetting one thing. Actually, two,” Limestone stated matter-of-factly.

A guilty look crossed Scoti’s face. Nope, definitely not forgetting anything.

Limestone’s eyes became slits. “Why do I suddenly have the feeling you know more than you are letting on. I mean, Susan I can believe, but Leanne, she would never skip class. Furthermore, I doubt Susan would have taken being tricked to jump out a windo… hey, where do you think you’re going?”

Lunch.

And just like that Scoti was gone.

Limestone turned to Lavender with a sigh of resignation. “What do you think she’s done this time?”

“Haven’t the foggiest but whatever it is she’s absolutely terrified. My senses are nowhere near as good as Susan’s or Leanne’s but even I could smell it on her,” Lavender informed.

“Fleeing the scene of the crime?” Limestone queried.

“Almost certainly. Where shall we begin looking for clues.”

“I guess the most obvious place to start would be where Susan and Leanne fell,” Limestone deduced. “Come on, no time like the present.”

*

“Well, something is going on,” Lavender exclaimed pointing to the crowd of individuals that had gathered near the spot where they believed their friends had fallen.

“BARK BARK, GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR,”

“Oh no.” Limestone’s head hit the palm of her hand.

“Wasn’t that…”

“Teeth. Yes, yes it was,” Limestone finished for Lavender.

“And didn’t we see Scoti ride out of the Great Hall…”

“On Teeth. Yes, yes we did.”

“And yet he was nowhere to be seen when we entered the Transfiguration classroom.”

“Most likely as Professor McGonagall wouldn’t allow him into her classroom,” Limestone reasoned.

“So Scoti purposefully found a way to get Susan out of the…”

Lavender was cut off once more by a stern and absolutely livid voice that made both girls freeze.

“WOULD ONE OF YOU STOP GAWKING AND EITHER GIVE ME A HAND OR FIND THE HORSE GIRL!”

Limestone wanted to do nothing more than turnaround and walk in the opposite direction but she forced herself forward and pushed her way through the crowd.

“I’m here professor,” Limestone said flatly. “What’s going…” she stopped mid-sentence and groaned as she caught sight of Teeth standing guard over two freshly dug graves.

Protruding from these graves were the heads of her two missing friends.

“Hi Limey, mind helping us out?” Susan chuckled nervously.

“Teeth,” Limestone said coldly.

The hellhound didn’t even bother looking up at his mistress. He knew that tone. His mistress was unhappy with him and his shenanigans. And thus, he chose to conduct a tactical retreat until she had calmed down a bit.

“Blooming coward,” Limestone groused as she watched her dog dissaparate in a plume of black smoke. “Oh well, done my part.”

And with a shrug of her shoulders Limestone turned…

“Hey, Limey, where you going?” Susan called out anxiously. “Aren’t you going to help us out of here?”

“Sorry, it’s lunchtime,” Limestone replied emotionlessly pushing her way back through the crowd and leaving a stunned Professor McGonagall and Lavender behind. “But if you insist.”

Limestone stamped her right hoof on the ground.