• Member Since 1st Feb, 2021
  • offline last seen 6 hours ago

WojakWriter


A man with a love of history, ponies, and stories about said ponies. No commissions please, I wrote solely for fun.

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Anon has been in Equestria for 5 years, working under Celestia as a Minister of Foreign Affairs. His tactics were seen as dishonest at best and unethical at worst. But when Celestia leaves suddenly, she names Anon as her temporary replacement to the throne. With internal bickering over whether Anon deserves this position and heightened tension with the Griffons, Anon must choose carefully. Will he become a tyrant or a fair king? And how far will he go to preserve Equestria?


A fully rewritten version of a greentext I wrote back in 2019. Could be a bit dated with tropes that I thought was good writing at the time, but I’m still proud of it.

For the Second Person tag you should note that sections from Anons POV are in first person, everyone else is in second person.

Romance tag is there because of a romance I included that I think was poorly handled, but half the story wouldn’t make sense if I just removed it so I had to keep it in.

Gore and Violence are self explanatory. It’s not there abundantly, but it is there.

Also don’t read the comments if you don’t want spoilers. Story discussion happens in them and that might ruin the reading experience.

Now on The Good HIE List!


Featured on 1/11/23! Thank you all.
Featured on 1/12/23. Thanks again.
Featured on 1/13/23! Three days in a row? Thanks guys.
Featured on 1/14/23. Four days in a row. Thanks guys, I’m touched.
Featured on 1/15/23. Five days? Holy shit I never expected this guys. Thank you all so much.
Featured on 1/16/23. This makes me wonder if there’s a limit to how many times I can announce a featured slot.
Featured on 2/2/23. Also marks the day I officially finished the story, so hooray.

Chapters (23)
Comments ( 260 )

Loving this already. I like the realistic view and older anon who isn't some genius but just common sense. Can't wait for more

11474662
Thank you! I promise that I’ll have another chapter out by tomorrow.

Not bad for his first day in office. Sensible changes without getting blueblood-y.

11474748
Agreed. So far this is shaping up to be my second favorite Anon story.

11474783
Well now, I’m touched to hear that. Thank you.

Bro bro this

This is that GOOD SHIT

I LOVE IT, I LOVE ALL OF IT!

11474811
Well, thank you for reading it. I’m glad you enjoyed it.

I enjoy this so far. My only real thing to note is that you tend to slip into second person often enough for me to notice. I'm not sure if it's the remnant of the old Green text style but I thought I should mention it.

11475113
Yup, it is. Can’t really help it though, I was a greentext author for 2 years before making a fimfiction account. Just an old habit that won’t die (:

bro im using read aloud and after “So, what is this ultimatum?”

i hear (Join our Subscribestar to remore these adverts)

11475138
What an ultimatum. Truly capable of driving fear into even the most stalwart of men.

Personally I would've utilised other thestral troops in the meanwhile to harass the griffons. Cut the power lines, let the city go dark, have the moon rise to side of the mountains, or perhaps not rise at all. Then when all is dark, let the night bombers, equipped by either grenades or molotov cocktails, rain fire upon any griffon formations within the city.

The same trick could be used in the invasion of griffon empire itself, sending thestral night raids, not unlike the British during ww2, but with far more accuracy to devastate vital infrastructure.

11475343
While that is a good idea, I wanted the battles and tactics, and equipment to mirror those of the First World War. The tactics you speak of were mainly used in the Second World War.

Why were cultists working on a portal to a land full of cartoon ponies? Who knows, people are strange.

“PONIES! I LOVE PONIES!” - Cultist Roller Coaster Rider

After she had finished, there was polite clopping for her, and then the minister of industry spoke.

Polite WHAT!?

I actually managed to do better than Celestia at something

Take that sunbutt.

Pettiness is the source of 90% of history’s successes

11475500
Oh lord, I meant clopping as in the sound horses make.

Because hooves.

11475531
I haven't even read the story but these two comments already made me laugh, I shall read now with high hopes!

Various ponies had described my methods as anywhere from dishonest and rude to downright unethical. They were right, but all this was done in the internet of Equestria.

*Interest

Other wise a good start

Woah woah woah, they’re sending a small detachment of their smaller army to lure in a much larger army onto the open field for the purpose of encirclement and annihilation?

It’s Cannae and Austerlitz combined! Bravo!

Here we go, counter-invasion! May this battle go down in history as a decisive equestrian victory, rivaling Cannae, Austerlitz and the entire 6 Day War.

11475616
Don’t worry, it’ll be a hell of a fight indeed.

And better yet, I’m close to completing its writing process, before I start the overview.

Should be out tomorrow (:

11475569
Anon never outgrew his shit posting days lol.

The buzzing of my timepiece pulls you from a pleasant dream

I dressed myself in a set of dark, formal clothes that Rarity had made for me when she had heard you were taking a job in Canterlot.

I chose to stay silent and grit your teeth

I took the monument blueprint from your coat and hand it to her.

Mixing first and second person in the same sentence. These aren't all, just the ones I noticed in this chapter.

Interesting story so far. Can't wait to see where it goes.

11475858
I noticed it too while re reading through them. I do fully intend to polish them up when the next chapter comes out.

I'll be honest. I was not expecting much when I started Anon von Bismarck. But you totally nailed it out of the park.

Fantastic, I can't wait for more. :) Thank you for writing this.

11475948
Well I’m touched. But you won’t have to wait much longer for more, next chapter is almost done

I enjoy the multiple POV's. I hope you do more of them.

The mixed first and second person is jarring

But it was over, and I was on your way back to Canterlot at long last.

I stretched out your legs and stood

I liked the design, and when you gave her the okay and she immediately kicks you out of the shop and gets to work.

11476170
I’m planning to go back and fix those

Thestrals would be a great asset for the military since they are nocturnal, have better night time vision, and would be well rested when the enemy are mostly diurnal.

Equestrian forced could attack continuously while the Griffons would have to wait for sunrise for visibility.

"Day" Ponies and "Night" Ponies fighting together would be a good show for unity.

11476467
Oh don’t worry about that, I already had a plan in place for introducing them. Though I just referred to them as “bat ponies” in my bullet points.

It’s going to be the most drastic change from my original (:

11476145
Well I’m happy that it worked so well. It was my first time doing something like that, though using second person did make it much easier to understand what was happening.

Fewer instances of switching into second person and overall I love it. I also love the look of the uniform you described and if I am honest I would not be surprised if this Anon continues his slow slide into authoritarianism. Which honestly I would adore.

11476702
Nothing wrong with a benevolent dictatorship.

So if the newly elected Griffon chancellory dislikes Equestria as much as the old one did, does Anon keep mulliganing until he gets a suitably cowed figurehead?

11476777
I don't think those elections will be exactly free and fair

Anon is lucky that Luna is willing to defer to him so much. If she had contested his leadership, things could have gotten ugly. I've got the distinct impression though, that Luna probably doesn't trust herself with rulership after everything that has happened. Her magic-obliteration-beam and subsequent mental breakdown only serves to reinforce her apparent volatility.

Anon has got a pretty level-head all things considered, she is probably very happy with him running the show while she goes off to play soldier. Her anger in the beginning was probably more, because she felt slighted by her sister rather than any actual desire to take the mantle of ruler.

i appreciate the main character's rational decision making and level headed leadership, it's rare in fics sometimes.

We will march on Griffonstone itself, we will excise the vile monsters that have mislead the griffon peoples, and we shall guide them back to the righteous path! So what do you say, ponies of Trottingham, ponies that I am glad to once more have back in the fold, what do you say?”

Will this result in an increase in taxes?

11477584
Taxes? In the glorious land of Equestria?

No, they’re “willing donations included with every purchase”

"The term monster is relative. From the point of a canary, a cat is a monster. We are just used to being the cat."

-Dr Henry Wu

Lina broke the silence. ”This is something that you truly feel strongly about, isn't it Anonymous?”

Luna

The red one is the mistake

The green one is the correction

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