There just isn't too much to talk about yet. All we have now is the set up. We haven't gotten to the real meat of the story yet. I can give one pro and con though. The weird and out of nowhere way you set up a future threesome with Twilight was really fun, but Cedric came of as rather tactless in is conversation with Shy. Maybe you can say it shows just shows how comfortable he is with her, but it was oddly off-putting to me.
10646754 Yeah, when I wrote it, Cedric was supposed to have a little more screen time. The next chapter will primarily be a clop scene. The one after that...
I am cautious of the embellished writing. And the human doesn't have much depth to him. But the setting sounds entertaining and this is tagged as porn. I guess I shouldn't get my aspirations too high.
I really was hoping for some comments tbh
10646641
Me too pal...
10646641
10646646
There just isn't too much to talk about yet. All we have now is the set up. We haven't gotten to the real meat of the story yet. I can give one pro and con though. The weird and out of nowhere way you set up a future threesome with Twilight was really fun, but Cedric came of as rather tactless in is conversation with Shy. Maybe you can say it shows just shows how comfortable he is with her, but it was oddly off-putting to me.
Damn... a wonderful start. Can't wait for the next chapters!
10646754
Yeah, when I wrote it, Cedric was supposed to have a little more screen time. The next chapter will primarily be a clop scene. The one after that...
Hmm, interesting. I look forward to future chapters!
I am cautious of the embellished writing. And the human doesn't have much depth to him. But the setting sounds entertaining and this is tagged as porn. I guess I shouldn't get my aspirations too high.
10647264
Do you mind explaining the problem with the embellished writing?