Taking on a New Life

by AmethystMare

Part Eight

Author's Note:

Adagio learns more about how to work with the siren inside her as her and Donnie search for an apartment, their relationship tentatively moving forward...

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Story © Amethyst Mare / Arian Mabe
Characters © respective owners

Taking on a New Life
Part Eight

Written by Arian Mabe (Amethyst Mare)
Commissioned by Kittenrose232


The bar grew boring to Adagio, though she didn’t want it to be. All she wanted was for things to go back to her version of normal, though she knew how to do everything so well there that it was no challenge at all for her. However, working on autopilot where things did not interest her as much at least meant that there was more time for her to talk to the siren, passing back control between the two of them as if it had suddenly become the most natural thing in the world.

So, what happened to you before I met you?

Adagio’s mind wandered, finding the siren inside. It was still strange to her to have any mind and consciousness in there, feeling the shape of the siren in some medium place, floating as if she was a hippocampus type creature that did not fall prey to the wiles of gravity at all. Of course, in one’s mind, there were no such things as gravity, but it was still a little disconcerting to Adagio, coming from an outside perspective. But she spent a lot of time looking in those days too.

Don’t you mean before you met me? It’s more polite to phrase it that way.

The siren snorted and Adagio felt rather than saw her roll her eyes.

Maybe. But this is us talking – we don’t have time for politeness in here. Besides, you can feel what someone really means, here, in someone’s thoughts. You know this.

Adagio sighed. Talking to the siren was exhausting sometimes but she could not deny that it was interesting, conversation that kept her going while she smiled and poured drinks and made sure they got to the right people in the bar with a cock of her hip and a flirty smile, all timed perfectly right.

I was in the armed forces, back then.

Combat? Fighting?

The siren dug around in Adagio’s mind as she squirmed.

Don’t do that, you know it makes me feel weird. How’d you like if I fished around in your mind for stuff like that? It’s invasive.

Everything about this is invasive. I wouldn’t have to do any of that if you’d just talk to me, you know.

That was true, in a way, though that didn’t make it any better for Adagio. She still had a lot of adjusting to do, not even a year passed since the siren took up residence in her mind, changed her body from man to woman, taken on a new form.

But she had to play ball, the give and the take between them tentative, something that still had to be maintained.

I was never involved in combat, but I went through training and helped in communities where our presence is needed.

She paused, thinking back.

Some combat, but not front lines, I didn’t mean to say that. But we used weapons, not our fists and feet, not like in the dojo. Somehow, doing that feels more real, you know? It feels like cheating to use hunks of metal to defend yourself, even though it’s fun to shoot targets still.

She paused again, something twisting inside her. Why did it make her feel sad that she hadn’t done it for a long time? It was not as if she was not able to do it, she could go back to it at any time.

I never considered you for a fighter…but you’re right, it does seem strange to fight with tools. That’s not how we do it.

Your song? Adagio pressed. And you said “we”? What do you mean by that?

The siren warmed to her, a soft feeling seeping into Adagio’s mind, so tangible that it prickled at the tips of her fingers.

Not only that. And there are others, others like me. We’re here, in this world, because we were banished, at least two of us, though I don’t know where they are. After we were separated and our necklaces destroyed, we lost the powers we had when we started in this world, the power we had stored from stirring up unrest and chaos. You’ve felt that strength from causing what you’d say is “trouble” too, haven’t you?

Adagio considered that. Sometimes, it was true. She was at her strongest when there was strife around her, whether or not she had caused it. She didn’t like that though, not feeling it was in keeping with her old life and self, wanting to keep hold of that. Growth and change, however it was forced, were things to bear in mind but there was only so much that she could lean into without forgetting that she had a lot more to her than what the siren had transformed her into.

I can sense my brethren, but I know they are not in any danger. Perhaps they are not trapped in objects like I was, though that was only a curse of another gone wrong. They would have called it a spell, but, when ending up like this, I can’t see it as anything else.

Adagio started, a glass sloshing over in her hand. That was a surprisingly tender side of the siren that she had not delved into before, but the lift that pushed back from it told her that the siren was by no means willing to go into any further detail on that one. And that was okay too. They didn’t have to know everything about each other right off the bat, not all at once, not all the time.

They are well and safe. That is all that I need to know.

If we continue our training, our sparring in the dojo, Adagio offered, we can find them, make sure they’re okay. It sounds like there’s been a lot of trouble in your world.

Taking a deep breath, her hand balled into a fist.

We’re equipped to deal with everything we need to.

That self-confidence had not been something present in her back when she’d been Knight, a new development, a quiet resilience that spoke of all that the two of them had gone through together. Maybe that too, in a way, was just how things were supposed to be, growing and developing, finding more even to day to day life than may have been expected previously.

The siren was quiet. But they knew where each other stood.

*

The shift ended late at night, easing into the colder months of the year, though it was not yet cold enough for her breath to frost in the air. The siren took the lead, piloting their body for the moment, seemingly fascinated with just how it felt to breathe in and out, the contrast of warm breath pouring over her lips where cold air was dragged in curious to one liked here.

I never had to breathe through my mouth before, only nostrils. It’s strange to do it like this.

Adagio could only laugh.

“Hey – Dagi!”

She stiffened, the siren turning around inside her as if she could physically see behind without looking.

Hey!

You don’t have to answer him from in there.

“Hey,” Adagio said verbally, lips moving, though she had to think about what she was saying, Donnie approaching – for of course it was him. “What are you doing here?”

They hadn’t planned to sing that night and her mind could not help but jump to conclusions. Had he come out just to see here? No, but yes – he couldn’t possibly have been walking home in that direction.

Donnie’s smile, as it was, sent her heart softening, melting, easing down from its frantic place.

“Come get a drink with me.”

Normally, she would have rebelled against something like that – who wanted to be told what to do? That wasn’t fair, not fair at all, but she was the one in charge and what she wanted too perfectly matched up with what he laid down for her. It was hard to push back against anything like that when it worked so well.

So, they walked, a light pattering of cooling rain prickling down, glistening on her cheeks. It was too easy to laugh as they ducked into another bar that was quiet and kitschy, the type of place that was a hole in the wall that one could miss if they did not already know it was there before going in. Their cocktails were fruity and a mix that neither of them knew, even if they were delicious – not something that would have gone down well with the casual, rougher clientele of their usual bar, even though the money there was good.

Still, it was good to try something different and the hint of alcohol loosened their tongues, making things that were big topics all on their own a little easier to broach.

“Hey, Dagi…”

She warmed to his use of his nickname for her. Of course, only Donnie got to call her that. Adagio scowled inwardly at the thought of anyone else being too familiar with her. That wasn’t something that either she or the siren wanted, not in the slightest.

“Yeah?”

She tried to act casual, sweeping her finger through the condensation on her glass, the moisture that collected on the outside. All she had to do was to play it cool, not to push too far…

Why not?

Adagio had to hide her smile that time too.

Because there are other ways to get what you want than going in all guns blazing.

The siren frowned.

You’ll have to explain to me about guns… Something to do with the shooting range? Combat?

Not now!

For Adagio really needed her attention to be in reality right then and there, ignoring the presence of the siren as much as she clamoured to know what was going on. That was something, in Adagio’s world, that could only be told from life experience, which the siren, unfortunately, simply did not have in the same way. The tales left untold between them would come out in time, but the beauty of their developing friendship would mean that things changed slowly, in the natural fashion.

“So, I was thinking…”

“Oh, that’s a dangerous topic already,” Adagio teased, poking his arm where it lay across the table. “Thinking too much about things is bad for you. Why don’t you spit it out? Things will be easier then, you know.”

Donnie blushed a little, his gaze sliding away from hers as if it had burned him.

“I… Uh… Well, I was thinking…”

He’s adorable, isn’t he? The siren commented. What’s he getting at?

If you are quiet, you’ll find out sooner rather than later.

“Look, anything you have to say, it’s going to be okay,” Adagio said, a little more warmly than she had intended. “You don’t have to worry about words with me.”

He was bold enough to meet her eyes then, even though all of it seemed like too much for her. It was quick, so quick, and so awfully slow in other ways all at the same time.

“I was thinking that your apartment is a little small for you, you’re making good money now.”

“Huh?”

She blinked. That hadn’t been what she’d been expecting at all! Something more dramatic, at least, surely?

“Yeah?”

She pressed him on, sitting back in her chair, the siren watching quietly. That made a change.

“Well, I want to help. But, what I mean to say is, I think we could help each other. What if we moved in together?”

The last words rushed as if they were all trying to get out all at once, blending and blurring into one another as he tried to force them all out. Adagio sat up a little straighter, heart pounding.

“Really?”

“I mean – not like that!”

He was bright red by that point, holding his hands up, shaking his head, though the crux of what he had said, what he did mean, remained.

“I mean, we could both save money if we moved in together – and we get on so well!”

Go on, you’ve got to help him out. The siren prompted her. It’s not all that much fun to watch him squirm for so long, you know.

“Yeah, we do.”

She gave him an easy smile, the kind of smile that was one more often shared between friends than those that were, well…anything more than friends. There was no sense to her in putting labels on things that did not need labels putting on them, shaking her head a little, lips tugging up a little higher. Her possessiveness and feeling of a claim to him were there to be inspected, at some point, though there was a part of her, the part that had been Knight alone before, that knew too that she had to have his consent if she wanted to have him.

If he chose to go elsewhere…stopping him would not be an option. No matter how much the siren seethed at such a notion. If he didn’t want her, there was nothing that she could do about it – fighting for him, of course, but not forcing, never forcing.

You have strange customs here.

Adagio pressed her lips together.

It’s the right thing to do. I’ll tell you more about it later, but you cannot force this issue.

At least it seems like he likes us.

Me. He likes me.

The siren scoffed, though it was more playful than before.

Whatever you say. We’re both in this together.

If that was so, it was not something that they understood as well as they could have. But that too would be just another thing that came in time.

“Relax, Donnie, I think it’s a great idea!”

Adagio could not be sure whether she was holding her enthusiasm back or pushing it forward, only that she had to keep it at just the right level for the situation. Too much and it would look like she was angling for, well, what she wanted, what she had not honestly admitted in full, eloquent language to herself. Too little and he might turn back from it altogether – and she so very, very much wanted to be around him more.

Would living with him be like me living in your head, us sharing a body?

Adagio stifled a laugh, covering it with her hand, lest Donnie ask questions that she didn’t have any sensible answers for.

No, not at all. You’ll see. This is just one that you’re going to have to see for yourself, in time.

Patience had never, however, been the siren’s strong suit.

They chatted more freely, the tension held in Donnie’s shoulders relaxing as he moved into talking, the condo that he had in mind for the two of them, to be fair, a little out of his price range if he was going for it alone. Maybe it was merely mutually beneficial for the two of them or maybe it was something more, though Adagio knew which of the options there that she hoped it would be. All it took was a little push in the right direction for things to move on and she’d be right where she wanted to be.

Maybe it was Donnie making the first move for her.

Her heart pooled in her chest, a liquid puddle warming and teasing, curling deeper into her. Even the siren was quiet, surprised by the sensation, the all-encompassing glow that spread through her body as if it could flow through her veins, her nervous system.

This is new.

But that was all that the siren had to say on that.

They poured together over his phone, the alcohol slipping from their systems, more clear-headed and keener to see just what they could afford. It was a new step, a big step, but the right one for the two of them, even if it was something that would take a considerable amount of planning.

Adagio smiled, genuinely. Finally, things were looking up.

And she sincerely hoped they would continue that way.

*

Does it always feel this way?

Adagio grinned, speaking by way of her smile in answer to the siren. It was hard to feel gloomy at all when there was so much good going on for her. She had her good job at the bar, so many singing gigs that she couldn’t keep up with them all, whether they were at the bar or the more lucrative ones, further afield, that she was slowly considering, even if still playing hard to get.

“Hey, Adagio – what’s next on?”

Olivia flipped her hair back over her shoulder, which had grown curlier and even had a reddish-orange tint to it, mimicking Adagio. The siren laughed.

There’s your little protégé.

Adagio had to suppress the urge to roll her eyes.

Yes, but you don’t have to say it like that. She’s going to be useful.

More so when she knows how to act properly. She’ll be an extra set of eyes here, looking out for the things we can’t.

“Table sixty-four wants mixers, the usual.”

Adagio fired off commands rapidly, though she could not deny that she had a particular kind of liking for the young woman who had become her shadow. She couldn’t deny her such things, the attraction to her something that simply affected some people, a good kind of control and power that swept over her, enjoying the need to take someone under her wing. Olivia bustled off, though Adagio could be helpful too, showing her tips and tricks, how to stack glasses, how to dry them quickly. Little things went a long way in that business and it turned out that Olivia had a voice on her too.

She could even be a back-up singer for us, someone to add depth to our vocals.

Adagio smirked, tapping the side of her nose, though only the siren was there to see it.

Give it time.

For the one thing that she had to teach the siren, quicker than most, was the art of patience. There was no rush to be had at such a time, moving on, step by step, showing her the ropes and setting her up.

She’s changed so much.

Do you think we could get her to do her hair all the way like us?

Even the set of her shoulders is different.

Sometimes, it was hard to tell which of them was talking at any one time, their thoughts blending together so seamlessly that they moved and thought as one.

You know, I only went along with it because I knew she needed a push.

That was definitely Adagio’s thoughts, however, the siren drifting in the background.

Only went along with it?

Adagio shook her head.

Because Olivia needed a push, I let this carry on, though don’t get me wrong, seeing her change to suit us…that’s a good feeling. I can’t explain that. But pushing Olivia is getting her noticed, as if she was always meant to be like this. She’s changing, but in a good way, and there will be many good things in her future, her career, if only we can drive her forward.

The siren sighed.

Honestly, what is wrong with you? Sometimes you can do this for the fun of it. What else is there to amuse yourself with in this kind of life too?

Adagio knew that too, but kept that thought deep down, hidden, private just for herself. Some things did not have to be shared and, over time, they had learned to keep things secret where needed. But only certain things could be set aside, meaning that they had to be diplomatic with themselves as to what they kept for themselves.

It was finite. It could be wasted.

Not all had to linger at the bar, however, Adagio getting her shifts done, taking her stage time with Donnie and raking in all the money that the two of them could ever have needed. But that left time for other things, for going on, for finding out who she was again.

She ducked into a shop in the afternoon before one of her evening shifts, hands shoved into the pockets of her fluffy, padded jacket. It was not all that cold yet but, still, Adagio felt that she needed to ward off the chill of the day, winter not being her favourite season. It was always so grey and drizzly, rarely with the white illumination of snow at all to set a gleam about the cityscape, a season where little good seemed to grace the concrete jungle.

Where we come from, we didn’t go into the cities much. Likely for the same reasons you’re looking for an escape from it now.

Adagio started.

Who said I was looking for an escape?

It’s obvious. Who’d want to be here at such a time? The city is somewhere that you come when you have something to do, no more than that. There is life here, of course, but it is not a place to live.

Adagio considered that, though she could see the siren’s side in her mind. She saw open plains that stretched down to cliffs, disappearing into a stormy, wild sea, foaming with white water and oceanic horses that dived in and out of it. The sky roiled above in the glory of the storm, other sirens in hippocampus form darting back and forth, spinning through the sky as if they were flying, though they had no wings to speak of.

We didn’t need wings to soar.

Their power was held deeper than mere wings, after all, though the others that Adagio saw in the siren’s memories made her gasp, ponies with wings, others with horns, all with powers that made her catch her breath. All that overcame over, however, was the sense of space that lingered in the siren’s memories, swelling forth with the beat of her heart, even giving Adagio the sense that her “tail” was moving, dropping completely into the siren’s mind for the want of her memories.

Do you see?

Adagio could see, yes, but that did not mean that living her city life took everything away, changed everything that existed in her reality. Setting the clothes that she had been looking at, considering buying, back on the rack.

Let me show you a bit more of my world then.

For there were little things that had not made it into her life as a woman, as Adagio, Knight lingering behind, wondering what had come of the self she had once had. The blending of personalities could not be overruled, of course, and whereas the food court at the mall had plenty of offerings, there was one thing that Adagio wanted to show the siren.

Here?

It was a restaurant that stretched out into a large, outdoor space, clad with laughter and the sizzling of meat. Adagio grinned, knowing exactly where to go, what she wanted to order, even though she could feel exactly how the siren was pursing her lips at her.

Really? This?

Adagio chuckled. Some meat turned, doner meat, fascinating the siren, but the majority was barbecued, sloppy and messy, a blend of other cultures that focused on flavour rather than form. Maybe there could have been neater and tidier ways of presenting it, but it was exactly as Adagio wanted it to be, choosing a burger and a kebab skewer, though the marinade dripped from the kebab, smeared across a paper plate.

This doesn’t seem very proper at all, not for you.

Adagio smiled, eating, the burger thick and juicy. It had been a long time since she had not eaten delicately, as if she always thought that someone was watching her, though it was not truly a concern. She was just overly conscious about the face and the front that she allowed others to see, how she could change, what she could become.

The siren gave the impression that she was looming over Adagio’s shoulder, wrinkling her nose.

But it’s so…messy. Why would you eat something like this?

Adagio laughed subtly, scooting her chair back as laughter drifted over to her.

Because I can. This kind of food is what I’d always stop by for before. Sure, I had a hot dog the other day, but I don’t always want to be finicky about what I’m eating. It’s not right and don’t I have enough standing to not worry what others think of me?

The siren considered that, sharing in the taste, the flavours seeping forth.

It is interesting… And you are right. I suppose we would eat raw fish before, as you can see our forms are suited for swimming too.

To demonstrate her point, the hippocampus-type siren flipped over, tail waving faintly.

That could be a messy endeavour too, though raw fish never tasted like this.

Adagio grinned.

Then I guess you’ve never had tacos either? Fish tacos?

That had the siren’s attention, zeroing in on Adagio, who was currently in control, as if she was hiding something from her.

Fish? There’s better fish here?

Adagio chuckled and shook her head. Luckily, she was far enough away from other patrons of the grill type restaurant, as casual as it was, that no one gave her a second look. For all they knew, she could have been reading a book or listening to something. The anonymity of being there was oddly alluring in a way she had not expected.

When no one knew where she was, who she was, things around her were quieter than they otherwise could have been. That was nice too.

Don’t worry, I’ll make sure you get some fish tacos too. How much of the taste can you get through this?

Adagio stepped back mentally, allowing the siren to take precedence. Technically, they shared the same name, but the one who was addressed as that daily took precedence, simply because it was easier that way. Sometimes, they too needed things to be easier.

Mmm…

It was a contemplative sound, though the flavours that burst forth filtered through to Adagio’s senses too, feeling the shifting tastes wind into one another. She could not help but giggle at the siren’s delight, something raw and plaintive, though it was almost infantile in its presentation. Maybe something like that, the newness of a human world, was not something that the siren had even tried to experience before.

Well, it would be up to her to change that if they were, by any means, to get along with each other.

Yes, you’re right. The siren’s thoughts and words wove into her mind as if they were being passed between the two of them, hand in hand. This is good, really good.

This is fine too when we are not trying to impress people. It’s all well and good to think about how we are perceived and what impressions we give, but it’s not all about that. Sometimes it’s just me. Just us. You and me.

Adagio tried to hide a smile, but she could not conceal the one that rose inwardly.

It’s hard to get away from you. Maybe the two of us are in a weird kind of relationship that’s more than friends now?

Oh, be quiet.

Sometimes, the best things shared were shared in peace and quiet. Allowing things to simply be as they were, their thoughts drifted, considering all that had changed, all the good in their shared life, even though they could never quite anticipate just what was going to happen next. There was always a change, something different to come, and maybe it was even that very lack of control that kept and made things so interesting for them.

They didn’t always have to lock onto everything to make it work. Olivia was one example of that, regardless of how much they liked her. They could teach her and shape her but taking control of her, no… No, that was not something that could be done, regardless of how they thought things should go.

She is a separate person.

Adagio smiled.

You’re learning. But that’s just how we’ve got to get by here.

For their situation was hardly normally even as the two of them, sharing control and delights at the same time, sank their teeth vivaciously into the meat, tearing it free, relishing in simple pleasures. They could get caught up in the rush and hustle and bustle of the city as much as they liked but there would always be those quiet moments to come back to, that would serve as the undercurrent.

And there was more to consider, how things would proceed with Donnie, the stirrings deep in her belly. They had not talked more about the condo, though she wanted to see more, to do more, already mentally going through everything that she needed to pack up. There were things to keep from her life as Knight and things to pass on, though it was another chapter in her life to close when all she could do was move forward, step by step.

Things would change, some that she would or would not be in control of. And that was okay too, as her skills in two minds, one body, grew. She had to learn and daily learning was the best way to get through, even as she sank back into old pleasures, simple delights, the kind of things that grounded her in her reality with the siren.

Taking on a new life had not been easy, but they could only do it together. And, with what Donnie had broached with them, things were coming together even better than they could have imagined. A new life stretched ahead, growing closer to him, though there was a part of her too that wondered why she didn’t just ask him out, why she didn’t do what might have been the next logical step. Yet the ride to get there, the journey itself, maybe that was too intoxicating to pass up all that easily.

Experiences were not to be set aside when they offered so much. Adagio smiled. The siren rested.

Things were looking up.