Jhonn
Joined 4th Jul, 2017 ·
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Pretty good, and I didn’t saw a single error, congrats!
10456177
:'v
Good story. Keep writing.
A little potential error though:
"But for Flurry it was seeing a ghost, distant and blurred memories of his childhood, his only father image was Sunburst, but even he always spoke of his real father with such passion."
Shouldn't the underlined words be her instead of his? It doesn't seem to make sense otherwise.
10456479
Yes, im going to fix it :'v
Interesting.
Mm
Death tag?
10458237
jmmm, why??? cus the poor friend of shining??
What is going on?
I’m so confused.
This was an interesting and wholesome story. So now Shining is an eternal. never dieing or aging, forever eternal.
It's a huge disappointment that it hasn't been continued with a full story yet.
10808716
:'v
someday, maybe, but poverty won't let me be creative.