Stories That Are Fine

by Speccer

What is this? [Comedy]

Author's Note:

Prompt: 'we didn't start the fire'
Thank you, Red, for hosting this panic!
This story got third place!

Twilight stood before her castle, frowning. “What is this?” she asked, gesturing in a vague direction in front of her.

“Hehe, well, you see,” Starlight, who was currently standing beside the unamused alicorn, looked a bit more nervous than usual. “We decided to hold a cooking class and-”

“And you didn’t have any red flags immediately pop up,” Twilight raised an eyebrow.

“Well, the good news is, you now have two entrances to choose from,” Starlight said, fidgeting.

There were now indeed two entrances to the castle, one slightly more jagged than the other, and it just happened to not include doors. “I can clearly see that,” Twilight said, moving to take the new one, leading directly into the kitchen. Starlight quickly followed her. Unfortunately, her fake smile game was a bit rusty, since she hadn’t enslaved any villages as of late.

Twilight stood on the edge of her former kitchen. The scene in front of her was… messy to say the least. “I assume you took all the proper safety measures, before starting.”

Starlight looked puzzled, before quickly composing herself, “Oh yes, naturally. We did the… thing, and uhh… closed the-”

“Alright,” Twilight nodded. “Can you run me through exactly what happened?” she asked, taking out a clipboard from somewhere. “This is a disaster worth documenting.”

Starlight cleared her throat, “Well, first off, we decided to make some pies. But then the students couldn’t decide what kind of pies to make, so we ended up making cupcakes.”

“I assume you didn’t get Pinkie to help you?” Twilight asked.

“No. We asked her, but she was busy doing ‘something else ‘cause she isn’t relevant here”. Whatever that’s supposed to mean,” Starlight frowned. “Anyway, so we got Trixie instead.”

“Another red flag,” Twilight muttered, jotting something down on her clipboard.

“So, all was going well, until it was time to take the cupcakes out of the oven,” Starlight said carefully.

Twilight nodded for her to continue.

“Long story short, Trixie turned the working oven into a teacup, causing a teensy tiny electrical fire,” Starlight finished sheepishly.

Twilight sighed. “Starlight, the oven is right there. Also, you still haven’t put the fire out!”

Starlight nodded. “Well yes, I magicked the oven back, also, turns out this is not a normal fire. I mean why else would it burn through the crystal? I totally had it under control until the crusading cutie markers showed up.”

“Cutie mark- you know what, I don’t even want to know,” Twilight put away her clipboard, her face clearly showing disappointment. That made Starlight even more nervous.

“Yes, well you see. They told us they had tried to get their cutie marks in firefighting once, and so they dumped a whole bunch of water onto the fire.”

“And…”

“And it had the exact opposite effect as intended.”

“Alright, this is believable,” Twilight said slowly, her gaze piercing Starlight, who at this point was sweating bullets.

After a few moments, Twilight relented and sighed. “You burned the juice, didn’t you?”

“I did.”

Comments

[Cosmas-the-Explorer]

Dang it Pinkie Pinkie Pie! You weren't there when we needed you the most! It was probably some ritual with Gummy. You traitor!!

Also how exactly did the CMC's fire fighting attempt go back in the day? I bet they put that specific fire out... only to start a much bigger fire in the process. Destorying a city's whole livelihood and economy in the process.