8. The Schemes Continue...
Chrysalis was leaning forward on the table, drawn in to this last plot of Cozy Glow’s. Tirek was staring as well, although he looked a good deal more perturbed. The remaining cookies had been forgotten on the table as the two far older beings had listened to the younger one. “It sounds like you have a crush on this Gallus creature,” Tirek intoned.
Cozy had her hoof on the griffin’s picture on her yearbook, and stomped down on it a few times. “Yes! I absolutely want to crush Gallus! I hate him, I hate him, I hate him! The way he’s an orphan like me, his sarcasm he thinks is so funny, his stupid big wings and the way the down on his chest looks fluffy and that thing that his head-crest feathers do, how they sweep forward in a way that he thinks is cool but it’s totally not…”
“You are too young to be ‘crushing’ any creature like that – ”
“Oh calm down, Tirek,” Chrysalis interrupted, waving a hoof. She licked her lips and turned to look at the centaur, grinning. “It’s nothing to be worried about, it’s just puppy lo – er, hate. Puppy hate.”
Cozy Glow turned a wide-eyed stare onto Chrysalis, gasping in shock. “I don’t hate puppies! Puppies are cute and cuddly and I’d never hate a puppy! Plus if I had a puppy with me, imagine how much cuter I’d be.” She put her hooves to her cheeks and offered a bright, wide grin. “Me plus a puppy would be the greatest weapon this team ever had!” She dropped her grin and her hooves, looking between Chrysalis and Tirek. “Especially since some creatures can’t figure out how the Bewitching Bell works.”
“Don’t change the subject – ”
“I’m telling you, it’s nothing to be concerned about,” Chrysalis insisted. She grinned wickedly at Tirek. “Although I find it very interesting that you’re concerned at all.”
The centaur recoiled at Chrysalis’ grin and waggling brow. He waved a hand at Cozy. “I don’t know what it’s like with changelings, but centaurs have standards about these things!”
“Mm-hmm.” Chrysalis droned. She lifted another cookie and bit into it, chewing thoughtfully and not breaking eye contact with Tirek as she did. She licked at the air, tasting it. “Purely uninvolved, principled standards, of course.”
Tirek shifted, crossing his arms and looking away. “Cozy Glow and I have been allies since I broke free from Tartaros. It shouldn’t surprise you that I’m concerned for her well-being. She is…dependable.”
“Mm-hmm…” Chrysalis repeated.
Cozy looked between the two of them. “Are you two okay?” She asked. “You’re acting really weird…”
Both looked to Cozy a moment, before glancing away. “No weirder than you,” Chrysalis insisted. “Are you done with your little revenge schemes?”
“Hmm?” Cozy asked. She finally lifted her hoof from the yearbook, looking down at the pictures there. “Oh…of course not! I hate those six the most, I hate them so much, especially Smolder and especially-especially Gallus, but I need revenge on the whole school! They all turned on me, and I’ll make them all pay!” She turned the yearbook to its first page of pictures. “Let’s see, Apple Sorbet! She was three dorm rooms down from me…”
Chrysalis groaned, grabbing another cookie, rubbing one temple as Cozy rambled on. That yearbook looked thick - they were going to be here for a while...and no doubt tomorrow would bring more ranting, or else the ceaseless noise of Tirek's working, grunting and clanging and banging
She looked down to the purple wooden stick that was her constant companion. “We need a vacation,” she whispered to it.
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I love seeing Cozy eternally struggling, bouncing back and forth between trying to be as adorable as possible and be as menacing as possible and usually falling short in both departments. Part of her being a--foal, I guess? I'm actually still not sure about that, I'm convinced she's like Baby Doll from Batman: The Animated Series and is actually in her 20s.
Aww, little Cozy's first revenge schemes. Isn't that pwecious? It sounded like she was on the right track with Yona and even arguably Sandbar. Her Silverstream plan had merit, though the thing about fishbowls and tanks is periodically cleaning them, yuck. I love Chrysalis' insistence that no one takes revenge against changelings but her, even if she has no idea who they are in particular. The Smolder plan needed work. Also, lava sharks with freaking lasers on their heads!
Chrysalis: Even if you could somehow invent these 'lava sharks' you realize that dragons hides are tough. Even shark teeth would likely not be enough. Especially as Smolder can swim through lava.
Tirek: I also find sharks highly over-used in revenge schemes. There was that one fellow who put sharks in parkas, now that was a fresh take on things.
Chrysalis: ...What?
Tirek: He called them 'sharkas.' I think it showed a lot of inventiveness! Which is more than I can say for Cozy...
Cozy: My plan is great! .... do you have the number for the sharkas guy?
Only at the first chapter so far and wondering if this is before or after Tiatara. If this gets answered in story, I suspect I'll find out in Ocellus or Smolder's chapter.
10064723
Well didn't quite get my answer with those two like I'd predicted, but I did get it at the last chapter! Totally called one detail about Gallus's chapter. This was tons of fun to read!
10064745
I think bold is Tirek and italics is Chrysalis. Tirek was likely commenting on his brother, Scorpan, betraying him to side with the ponies.
Nice! Love the continuity. So it’s a prequel to Tiatarta.
The reveal that Cozy totally does not have a crush on Gallus was really funny. Overall the fact that she’s very much still a filly, young and immature, shines through here. Still kinda bummed out that we don’t get to see what she thinks of Ocellus, but ah well.
Tirek’s latent paternal instincts towards Cozy is really interesting too. Looking forward to seeing more of the two of them in your next story!
That is adorable. I love papa Tirek.
Is Tartarus spelled Tartaros in some countries like how Cozy is spelled Cosy in britain?
And so it begins.
Overall, I absolutely adored this story. In many ways, it reminded me of it's prequel and I think that is a good thing. A fun, rereadable and cute fic.
10064778
Properly speaking there isn’t really a correct way to render it into the Roman alphabet, seeing as it’s a Greek name and there’s a bit of leeway with how to spell things coming in from different writing systems (viz., Czar, Tzar, Tsar; Kiev or Kyiv; Mao Tse Tung or Mao Zedong, etc.). If directly translated from Greek it would most correctly be spelled “-os”, but usually we go with the Latin version of the name.
However in the first episode where Tartaros was mentioned, Twilight consistently pronounced it “tar-tar-OS”, emphasis on the last syllable and with more of an “oh” sound, closer to how it’s said in Greek, instead of “TAR-tar-us”, emphasis on the first syllable and with an “uh” sound. So even though the show started using the more common English pronunciation later on, I’ve always stuck with spelling it “Tartaros” to suggest that everyone is saying it the way they did when it first premiered.
It’s a small thing.
Now in the Featured Box!
10064840
Whoooo!
10064806
I've noticed you talking about languages before, like using Basque for Zaldia. You have a background or interest in languages?
10064855
Interest, but no background. I'd love to know how to speak or read or write a bunch of languages, but after years of trying the only languages I know are English and Bad English.
10064885
When writing this I wrote Yona's and Silverstream's first and actually both of them ended with death as well, but I decided to revise it because I wanted to keep a degree of "innocence" to her revenge schemes, i.e., they're ridiculous and really more humiliating than anything (falling down stairs in cartoon horse land isn't likely to give permanent injuries). Plus the evidence from the show is that while Cozy talks a big game, she really isn't actually willing to directly kill anyone herself; the closest she comes is a team-effort with Chrysalis and Tirek against Twilight, but conversely during the throne room fight scene she doesn't kill any guards and actually seems like she goes out of her way to avoid causing any permanent harm.
But, at the same time, she is a kid with a lot of issues, so I can see her as having at least one creature that she hates enough that she totally comes up with this plan to kill Smolder because she's soooo awful and deserves it! As for whether or not she'd actually go through with it if she actually somehow managed to get the lava sharks and volcano she wants...eh, I'll leave that up in the air.
I knew it! Cozy DOES have a crush on Gallus!
That's adorable and really creepy
10064894
Makes sense. I would say, though, that Cozy nearly killed a bunch of ponies on the field trip to Cloudsdale. Cozy is a brilliantly deadly schemer but she's also a 10 year old, so she probably does have this sort of childlike fantasy revenge idea
The previous story was good but this one, is not as good
10064901
Like I said, directly kill. She's certainly callous and uncaring enough to not be particularly bothered by the idea of creatures dying as a result of stuff she plans, but her actual plans themselves won't ever have "X then dies" in them as a step. Except Smolder, for reasons outlined above.
10064905
Eh, can't hit home runs all the time. I'm still practicing my Cozy Glow and trying to nail down her character. I do have another story planned for the contest that I hopefully will be able to finish in time, which will also feature Cozy and be a bit less, shall we say, frenetic.
10064908
Ahhh, I see. That makes sense.
Cozy's hate-crush on Gallus is creepy and adorable and I am considering headcanoning it
10064894
Cozy can SAY it's about the smell or Smolder's early hoarding habits, but we all know it's because Smolder was the one who called out how little sense Cozy's claims about Starlight's vanishing made and how she didn't buy into Cozy's cute act.
We all saw how much Cozy hates it whenever someone doesn't buy into her cute act.
I knew I'd be right, sooner or later!
Damn that was fun , especially for a short story . Kudos on that ! Can't wait for the next part in this series !
10065008
I know right?! Check out my comment at the start, I had that same thought.
I love it all. From the song to the three sniping at each other to Cozy's adorable attempts at rage-filled revenge...
She's just so cute I wanna pinch her cheeks (and then probably get kicked in the gut).
Don't forget to pet it while you explain the plan.
Something tells me this sentence deserves to be extended into an full story...
Good story!
I enjoyed reading it.
10065070
It was!
Read it here: https://www.fimfiction.net/story/450660/trouble-in-tiatarta
10065172
I know, I was being sarcastic...
But thanks anyway.
10065212
Whups, sorry. XD
This was a fun short and cute story. I wish for the first one though you had set it up like it had actually happened more. With more drama and bells and whistles like it was reality before either Tirek or Chrysalis cuts in on it being unrealistic or the whole 'I brought cookies' thing. Would give it a better more fun start. Then with each other story a tad more detail and actual dialogue for the 'victims' would've made all of this a tad better. That said this was fun though. And nice to see more in the whole 'Chryssie has reformed' universe.
Wonderful work once again.
I'm trying to picture Gallus's face upon finding out about Cozy's little "crush."
It amuses me no matter how I envision it.
Okay, overall, 4.5 hoots out of 5. Quite funny and had me laughing out loud at several points. The only thing that dragged it down is that in this crack fic you put more thought into Cozy Glow than the show did. Not your fault, mind. ;)
10066803
Congratulations, Alondro. You just put more thought into Cozy than the show did. You anti-trolled. :p
10066824 I dunno if I can congratulate myself for that.
Putting ANY thought into that which had NO thought put into it kinda is as default a win as beating a quadriplegic in a triathlon. It's actually rather sad...
I mean, when you get to the point where "Teen Titans: Go!" clearly has more effort put into the writing, you now the standards are in the basement. Though, having witnessed "Thundercats: Roar", I can now say that Season 9 of MLP was STILL nowhere near the bottom.
Kids say the darndest things
10066573
Dr. Evil is a hack! Glomgold reinvented the use of sharks in evil schemes!
All Evil did was put lasers on their heads. Glomgold put the sharks in parkas. Sharkas.
...GENIUS!
10065600
Element of Maniacal Laughter, definitely.
10067214
God I love the new DuckTales cartoon. Watching the conclusion to its own second season really helped me pull out of the funk I was in over the conclusion of MLP, alongside writing Tiatarta. I actually never even watched the original cartoon, but I was an instant fan of the reboot from the start. And yeah, that theme never leaves your head, plus as one YouTube commenter put it, Felicia Barton manages to make it sound like she's waited her whole life to sing the song and she is ecstatic about finally doing so.
10067253
In seriousness, though, her appearance and demeanor hiding what's actually a keen mind, and her attempt to constantly get on creature's' good sides, including by giving them pastries, actually really does call to mind Pinkie Pie.
10067267
Heh, definitely. I watched the original as a kid but never felt all that much of a connection to it. I was fairly numb to all the hype and excitement that other OG Ducktales fans were bringing when news of this reboot hit. Then I started watching and HOLY CRAP THIS IS AMAZING!!!
Of course, being written and staffed by a lot of veterans from Gravity Falls explains why it's so rich, funny and deep. I'm actually a little frustrated over how good Gravity Falls and DuckTales are because I can't help but recognize they have, on the whole, better writing, better plots, better humor and better character consistency than MLP. Yet I still love MLP and its characters more and have never felt any urge to write for GF or DT. It's a frustrating sentiment, but honesty compels me to admit that yes, they are better written shows.
10064781 Yeah, tween tsundere Cozy and her overprotective Dad are awesome.
Delightful stuff, and good work in slipping in more backstory and character development for Cozy Glow than the show ever did. Thank you for it, and best of luck in the judging.
I was thrilled to see that you had posted a new fanfic after reading Trouble in Tiatara . I’m a bit envious that you were able to create a new story in such a short amount of time, whereas I’m still working on chapter 3 of my own story!
That said, I do have a couple of criticisms. Chiefest of these are the interjections Chrysalis and Tirek made while Cozy was explaining her revenge plans. I had a great deal of difficulty determining who was speaking! I noticed you colored Cozy’s song in red font; perhaps you could have used that color for Tirek, and blue for Chrysalis?
Aside from that, your story was amusing to read, but it was not on your previous story’s level. But then, this is a fluff piece, meant to get into Cozy’s head. I like that you try to give her a child’s view of revenge. How this kid became so twisted is a mystery the show could not be bothered to solve; hopefully, the season 10 comics will examine it. I also find her attraction to Gallus amusing.
I like Tirek here. His blossoming paternal instinct is charming; he’s like the MLP version of Piccolo!
I was initially confused about this story’s placement. I see that it happened before Chryss took her holiday. I’m really invested in your Chrysalis; I hope she makes up with the ponies. I would be amused to see how Cadance and Shining react to the “new” Chrysalis!
Keep up the great work! I look forward to finding out what Tirek and Cozy did on their trip.
10064689
They should make an animated series about Cozy and her ill-fated revenge schemes.
It'd be like Pinky and the Brain, but with a filly.
10074188
It'd have to be better than Pinkie, Elmyra and the Brain.
10074220
It says something about how bad that show was that even in the opening credits, the writers expressed their disgust with the whole thing.
Heheh, puppy hate.
Yes, you do need a vacation.
This is gonna take a while...
10067267
But the key difference is that Pinkie's Joy (how I retranslate Laughter when I'm, ironically, being more serious about it) springs from the happiness of others. While as seen here, Cozy's often comes from their suffering.