Act Three
To See Equestria
Chapter Twenty-Five
Palace Morning
It took a while to introduce everypony, and even longer before the new ponies managed to walk, but once that hurdle was cleared, Princess Celestia showed the Weasleys, the Grangers, Harry and Mr. Lovegood to their rooms. Sunset had invited the other three fillies to stay in her suite for the night.
The four girls, already more or less used to being ponies had a relaxing night. The others encountered some problems.
"Ow, Emma, careful where you put that horn. That thing is pointier than it looks."
"Sorry honey." Emma cuddled into her husband. While she had to admit that the fuzzy blue coat made him a lot more cuddly, she could have done without the slight headache she'd had ever since Sunset had taught Equestrian to everyone but Hermione, who already knew the language, and she had yet to work out a way to hug her husband without stabbing him with her horn.
Harry couldn't sleep. Sunset and the princess had helpfully pointed out that he would not need his glasses any longer. He had been wondering how his eyesight had gotten even worse from coming to Equestria. Suffice it to say that he was surprised to learn that it had actually improved. And improved by such an extreme margin. Out of the window of his small suite, he could see the lights of a distant city. He was sure he saw something that looked like a pony version of the Statue of Liberty.
The fact that his large wings kept itching wasn't exactly helping him sleep either.
Mr. Weasley wasn't entirely sure how he had ended up in this position. He had laid down on the bed and, just as usual, Molly had cuddled into him. The wing draped over his barrel was new, but not exactly unwelcome. But then Ron had cuddled up to his other side, the twins had cuddled up to Molly and over the course of the night, apparently walking over in their sleep, Bill, Charlie and Percy had joined the cuddle pile.
He sighed and tried to get back to sleep, contemplating why he had woken up before Molly. Then he noticed Percy's horn on his pillow, where his head was supposed to go.
Xenofilius Lovegood was faintly aware that something was off. He couldn't put his finger on what, but something was definitely odd. After a moment of contemplation he realized that the reason he couldn't put his finger on it, probably had something to do with the fact that he didn't currently have fingers. Unfortunately he couldn't put his hoof on it either. Given the rather rudimentary level of skill he currently had in using his hooves that was hardly surprising.
Carefully cracking open his eyes, he saw his suite. Though the vantage point was unusual. It took him about a minute to figure out that everything was upside-down and another to realize that he was hanging from the chandelier by his tail.
"How?"
Four giggling fillies made their way through the halls of the Royal Palace of Canterlot, the first of them carrying a phoenix on her back. Sunset had stirred with the first light of dawn, as usual, but, for some reason, this time, all of them woke up when she stirred. Unable to fall back asleep, the four of them made to explore the palace.
Sunset guided them through the expansive network of halls, stopping here and there to mention an interesting bit of history or trivia or point out an especially beautiful view from a window.
"Uh Hello?"
The four of them turned around to see a purple filly with a deep lavender mane, cut in two by twin stripes of purple and pink. She had her magenta eyes fixed on them, looking to be a little shy. Sunset was the first to react.
"Hold on. Purple filly, cutie mark of a six pointed starburst, deep lavender mane, you wouldn't happen to be Twilight Sparkle would you?"
"Uhm, yes, I am." After a moment's pause, she seemed to reconsider and provide a more formal introduction. "Excuse me, I'm still kinda new to this." She cleared her throat and then spoke in a more formal tone. "Twilight Sparkle, born of the House of the Stars, current Student of the Sun. Daughter of Night Light and Twilight Velvet."
Sunset had to smile at the formal introduction. She knew that Twilight was about a year older than she was, but she was clearly new to this. Still, Sunset chose to reply in turn. "Sunset Shimmer, born of the House of The Sun, Daughter of Stellar Flare and Sunspot and former Student of the Sun."
"You are Princess Celestia's last student? How come she never mentioned you?"
Sunset considered that for a moment, then smiled sadly. "Does the term 'my Little Sun' perhaps ring a bell?"
"Oh. Yes. She did say that quite a lot, especially the first few weeks, she always did seem a little sad when she did."
Sunset smiled again, more happily this time, almost proud. "Already learning to see through her mask, huh? Good. From what she told me, you learn fast. We'll see great things coming from you, Twilight." When she heard Hermione clear her throat behind her, Sunset blushed slightly. "Oh right, I should introduce you to my friends."
She stood aside so Twilight had a clear line of sight to the three ponies behind her. "These are Hermione of the Granger Family, daughter of Dan and Emma, Ginny of House Weasley, daughter of Arthur and Molly, and Luna of the Lovegood family, daughter of Xenofilius and Pandora. We're visiting Canterlot today."
The three fillies happily greeted Twilight who kept glancing at Luna. After a few more moments, Sunset couldn't hold her giggles anymore. "Never seen a thestral out during the day, huh?" Twilight shook her head. "We'll she's only been able to become a thestral For a grand total of maybe ten hours at this point."
Twilight looked at them with a questioning look. Sunset sighed quietly. "Look, we can show you, but it would probably be best if we didn't do that in the corridor. Hold on." With a faint ripple of the air, the five of them teleported back to Sunset's suite."
"Wow. Where are we?"
Seeing Twilight's expression, Sunset giggled and pointed at the door. "It's open, have a look for yourself."
Twilight opened the door and quickly realized her position. "Oh. I know this place. The door was always locked. Is this where you lived when you were the Princess' student?"
Sunset nodded and gently nudged the door closed with her magic. "It is. Now, to explain. These fillies aren't from here." When Twilight raised and eyebrow, she groaned quietly. "Okay, let me rephrase that. They're not from this world. They're from a nation called the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland. Located on a planet called Earth. Which is in another dimension."
"Another dimension?!"
Sunset nodded. "Yes. And, while were there, we usually don't look like this. We're not ponies. We look like this." She shifted into human form, prompting Hermione to do the same. "We're humans. And these three were born like this." She then pointed at Ginny and Luna. "They have yet to manage turning back."
Twilight simply stared at the two mythical creatures standing before her. She had heard the myths, of course, but she had never thought humans were anything more than that.
"This form has its advantages," Sunset pointed out. She stretched out her hand. "These things especially." She picked the still stunned filly up in her magic and sat down on the bed, levitating Twilight into her lap and gently petting her mane.
Slowly coming out of her shock, Twilight squirmed slightly. "You're right. This is pretty nice."
Sunset nodded. "Mhm, it is. Now brace yourself, for I shall show you the wonders of ear scratches." With that she put actions to words and began carefully scratching Twilight's ears. She watched in mild amusement as the inquisitive filly suddenly turned to putty in her hands. Suddenly there were three more fillies around her. She rolled her eyes. "This isn't going to work girls, I only have two hands."
"Well alright." With an artificially dramatic sigh, Hermione returned to human form and got to work on robbing Ginny and Luna of their ability to form coherent thoughts.
After about five minutes Sunset let up and switched back to stroking Twilight's mane and back. She knew from experience that, while still pleasant, doing so was of little hindrance to the mind. Still, it took another minute before Twilight was speaking coherently again.
"Wow. That was amazing."
Sunset nodded with a knowing grin. "I know, I figured that out a few months ago. To be honest, I'm kinda tempted to see how Princess Celestia would react to that."
Twilight's eyes widened. "Oh dear. I don't know if that would be a good idea, but if you try that, I kinda wanna see how it goes."
"We'll try that at some point," Sunset giggled. "But for now we should really go find the others and get them started on learning how to transform."
"Wait. Wait. Hold on. Others? Learn how to transform?"
Sunset face palmed. "Right, you don't know about that yet." She pointed at Hermione and the two fillies who were still non-functional in her lap. "They're not the only humans here. We brought along Ginny's family, Hermione's parents, Luna's father and another friend our age. And we couldn't change between human and pony forms at will from the start. The first time takes a good bit of focus and we arrived pretty late yesterday evening, so we decided to give them a night to get used to these bodies before teaching them to control that."
"Can I come along?"
"I was hoping you would." Lighting her horn again once they had all turned back, Sunset teleported them to another wing of the castle, the area that held the visitor suites. "Now, that room should be Harry's if I recall correctly."
Knocking on the door with a hoof rewarded her with a mumbled 'come in'. Using her magic to open the door, she stepped in, followed by the other four fillies. The deep purple colt on the bed cracked open one of his slitted green eyes and looked at the intruders. "Oh. G'morning Sunset. Is it time for breakfast yet?"
Sunset smiled at the sleepy colt. "Not quite yet. You were just the first one we reached. We're fetching everyone. Breakfast should be in half an hour or so."
"Oh. Okay. Let me just get dressed." He stopped when four of the five fillies before him broke into giggles. "What?"
Sunset managed to stifle her giggles long enough to answer. "You can skip that step Harry. Ponies don't usually wear clothing. When we do it's either for work or purely decorative. And your human form is still clothed. Or do you remember taking them off?"
"Oh. Right." Harry shook his messy mane and got out of bed. "Sorry, I'm not quite awake yet." He yawned. "Had some trouble sleeping. Too much to think about."
"Like the fact that you don't need glasses any more?"
"For example. I think I saw something that looked like the Statue of Liberty, but as a pony."
Sunset stared at him, stunned. "You managed to see all the way to Manehattan? Wow."
"Manehattan?" Ginny piped up from behind them. "Seriously?"
Hermione giggled. "For some reason, most Equestrian city names seem to be horse-based puns on the names of places on earth. In fact I'm pretty sure Canterlot is just a pun on Camelot."
"Wow. I didn't even notice." Harry had to suppress a chuckle of his own. "I take it you haven't gotten the others yet?"
"Nope, we got to you first," their new companion piped up. "I'm Twilight, by the way, Twilight Sparkle."
"Pleasure to meet you. I'm Harry. Harry Potter."
"Uh, Harry," Sunset piped up. "That's not really how introductions work in Equestria. If you say it that way, Ponies will think 'Potter' is part of your first name. The correct way to introduce yourself would be as 'Harry of House Potter, son of James and Lily'." She shook her head slightly. "At least that's the formal way, in informal contexts it's enough to just introduce yourself as Harry."
"Oh. That's good to know actually, thanks Sunset." When she simply smiled, Harry tilted his head. "We should probably tell the others about this too, shouldn't we?"
Sunset thought for a moment. "Probably. Wanna come along?"
"Sure."
The group left the room and made their way down the hallway. Twilight studied the colt walking along before her with interest. She had never met a raptor before. Walking, as he was, beside Ginny, his eyes weren't the only obvious difference. His wings seemed longer and narrower, more like those of a bird of prey. Suited for long, enduring glides and quick dives.
She would have to read up on them later.
Before long, the group arrived at their next stop. Hermione was the one to knock on the door. "Mister Lovegood? Are you awake?"
"Yes. Is that you girls? Do come in." The girls pushed the door open, and saw an empty room. They looked around for a moment, before a voice called out to them. "Up here."
Looking up, they saw the thestral dangling from the chandelier by his tail. "A little help would be nice. I'm not sure how I got up here. Or how to get back down."
Luna giggled. "Don't worry daddy, that apparently happens sometimes. It's instinctive. Just spread your wings and focus on letting go."
Following her advice, Xenofilius only took a few moments to glide back to the floor. A quick cushioning charm from Sunset prevented an unpleasant landing. "Thank you. I was getting rather bored up there. Though it was a lot more comfortable than I would have expected."
Rolling her eyes, Sunset led the group out of the room. It wasn't long before they reached the room Princess Celestia had given Dan and Emma for the night. Once more, Hermione knocked. "Mom, Dad? Are you awake yet?"
After a moment, Emma's voice came through the door. "Yes Hermione, I'm awake. Give me just a minute to throw your father out of bed."
A minute later a slightly subdued Emma came out of the room to join the growing group, followed by a very tired Dan. Hermione looked at her worriedly. "Mom? Are you alright?"
"Don't worry, dear. Just a bit of a headache."
Narrowing her eyes slightly, Sunset turned around, lighting her horn. "A headache, you say?" Her eyes lit up with magic and she looked at Emma intently for a few moments, then a wide smile spread across her face as she let her magic fade. "Don't worry. That should go away soon." Without another word, Sunset turned around, leading the group to the last room they had yet to visit.
This time, Ginny knocked on the door. "Mom, Dad, guys? You awake yet?"
"Ginny, dear? Is that you?"
"Yes mom."
"Come in."
With a shrug, Ginny pushed the door open, stopping after a few steps. She looked at the various beds strewn around the room, then at the pile of ponies on the biggest.
Luna came up behind her, tilting her head slightly. "How did this happen?"
No pony can resisti the cuddle pile!
Do it!!!
Yay, new chapter!
Another good chapter, keep up the good work!
wow, taken out of context this could be considered either really perverted or VERY EVIL
9602378
I also want to see celestia get ear scratches as well.....maybe a tummy rub as well......also to who ever is writing this will the rest of the mane 6 appear in this maybe spike or nightmare moon and eventually luna …..the moon pone not the human I hope youll be doing the other books as well.....also does there exist any fics of the chronicles of Narnia were I dunno equestria is connected to Narnia during the events of the first book and has to help the humans and Narnia against the snow queen?
9602475
Okay, slow down ... chill ...
Celestia will get her ear scratches ... in time ...
The rest of the mane six and Luna (princess, not Lovegood) will show up in due time.
I intend to cover the events of all the books as far as they will happen in this continuity. Expect things to go severely off the rails.
As far as TCON goes ... I have no idea ... but this site does have a search function ... I'd try that ...
9600344
Originally, I kept reading it to see the drama in the comments. At this point, the only people you have left are sycophantic yes-men, so I think it's about time I dropped this. No drama from people who refuse to look critically at a story and only give shallow little "Good chapter. Can't wait for more" reviews that are a dime a dozen and don't do anything to actually help an author improve their writing abilities.
9600420
Wow, that was a lot of verbal diarrhea for absolutely no point to be made. You completely ignore everything in the story (such as her immediately befriending Harry with like two sentences spoken to him, immediately going on to "fix" all his problems at home even though she has no way of actually knowing anything is wrong and just generally being magically omniscient for everything that goes on around her) in favor of pointing out ONE actually explained reason behind some of the author's reasonings. There is a lot wrong with this story. And yes, Sunset is absolutely a Mary Sue because she immediately has a solution to every single problem that ever comes her way. She faces no struggle. Everything goes her way. I've said it before, and I'll say it again. What's the point in reading a story if you already know how it's going to end? Something happens to Sunset. Sunset waves her hand to fix the problem. Everybody praises her and acts surprised because such a little kid just one upped an entire generation of wizards. Rinse and repeat. It's absolutely boring, incredibly cliche, and just shitty writing.
If you want to write an OP character, you can't just let them blaze through everything with no conflict. Take Saitama from One Punch Man for example. He is absolutely OP. He literally breaks any type of balance or power scale in that universe. You know why it isn't a shit Mary Sue story? Because it focuses on his interactions with other people, where he actually struggles.
What's being written here is just... well, as stated above. "Problem" encountered. "Problem" solved. Generous praise/surprise. Repeat.
9602475
There is a Sunset in Naria story called The Unicorn and her Boy.
nice work on the chapter.
9602635
Yeah, I'm afraid I have to agree. I was genuinely happy to see the author spending time on revising chapters before going forward, that's something that far too few authors are willing to do. Unfortunately in the very first chapter after the hiatus Sunset goes to fix Harry's home life out of nowhere and Harry becomes a super special awesome ultra rare subspecies of pegasus with kung fu spy plane action, because god forbid any of the characters be average in any respect, let alone have actual flaws. Then the chapter afterwards has basically nothing happen at all. Sure, Twilight shows up, but that part just sort of happens without any particular buildup or tension, then there's the obligatory part about hands, then there's a bunch of words about people waking up, and then the chapter ends.
Dialogue could use a bit more prose framing to set up the scenes around it, but that improves a bit in later chapters. Still not the best but improvement is improvement.
Other than that, would you mind if I adopted Raptors for my own Head Canon? I'm toying with my own MLP/HP story and might want to use them in it.
The revisions have helped an already good tale evolve into something vastly better. Though, Sunset is still a Mary Sue, that aspect is no longer jarring and does not detract from the story.
I'm glad to see you're publishing chapters again. This is well worth the read.
Pony Pile!
Perfectly pleased, perusing precious plot, promulgating priceless pun-play...Potter's peepers proudly parting plains painlessly...uuh, I ran out of steam.
9602929
Sure thing, go ahead. Do note however that, here at least, raptors are adapted for enduring high altitude flight and quick dives, meaning they are far below average at quick maneuvers other pegasi would find easy.
9603045
I agree on the missing commas, but why would I delete along?
9603130
Yay ... continuity errors! Thanks.
9603554
And that's what happens when you change the verb and forget to remove the original one.
9603584
9603588
Thanks. More continuity errors ...
9603600
Yeah ... teleportation is no joke. Of course, she still needs to have been somewhere before to teleport there.
I don't care how improved Harry's vision has become as a raptor type Pegasus, there is simply now way beyond magic shenanigans for him to actually see the Statue of Harmony from Canterlot unless Equestria is far smaller than represented in the show. The curvature of the planet (and the nation of Equestria is on a planet, as shown by Twilight's globe all the way back in episode one) would put the entire city of Manehattan well below the horizon.
Mind you, I don't personally mind if Raptor vision is innately magical, enabling them to see past the curvature of the horizon, but simple superior vision alone would not do it, and somepony might want to point out to Harry just how astounding his new vision really is.
On the other hoof, if you decide that you don't want Harry to break physics in this particular manner, Ponyville is right down there in the foothills below Mount Canterhorn, and is actually visible from Canterlot. Harry's new vision would probably allow him to see individual ponies (possibly in great enough detail to be able to recognize them later).
9604467
Maybe hes like an elf from Tolkien, where the earth is flat, but only for them
9617637
It is quite possible that Equestria's dimension is indeed flat. The sun and moon rotating around the world is indicative that the system is not conventional. Perhaps even artificial.
What Sunset is saying doesn't make sense when Twilight introduces herself in the way Sunset says to Harry is wrong. Being a native, Twilight would know better. However, Sunset's explanation of Equestrian naming conventions does not match show canon. Is that an intentional twist for this story?
9851754
In the context of this story 'Sparkle' is part of Twilight's given name, not her family name.
And pray tell, what is the canonical way names work. Because I haven't been able to figure it out.
9851754
In this story, Twilight's family name is Stars, making her full name Twilight Sparkle Stars. Twilight Sparkle is a double first name, like a Human girl named Mary Ann Smith introducing herself "I'm Mary. Mary Ann."
Ok how is it that in five or so years with this fandom I never caught that last pun
I should have mentioned this in an earlier chapter but Sunset is actually several years older than Twilight. Twilight only recently got her cutie mark so being 12 is not exactly plausible.
Ohh I can't wait to see how Princess Luna would react to ear scratchies once she is saved from Nightmare Moon🤗
I do love how this story quietly has ponies basically exerting an irresistible gravitational pull on one another while sleeping. I'm impressed Ginny somehow managed to resist the Weasley pony-pile.
10734957
Maybe because she was in a pile of her own, with Sunset, Hermione and Luna
PONY PILE!