Stuck In The Middle With You

by Vargras

The List

Over the past few months, Luna had been working on a new hobby of hers in secret - well, as secret as she could keep it, at least. It was rather hard to stay quiet about it when the results could be viewed by anypony within Equestria, but few were observant enough to ever notice the changes. Perhaps 'hobby' wasn't the proper term for what the young Princess had been doing. After all, this was something she had done long ago and had 'forgotten', due to Night Mare Moon's possession. It was Twilight Sparkle's Hearth's Warming gift to her that had partially inspired her to take up the craft once more, and she had practiced it with every intent of success.

She was attempting to make stars.

The throne room was a maelstrom of magical force as Luna dabbled with the cosmos itself, warping gravity and forcing dust and gas to swirl and combine together. For most of the guards, this had since become a nightly occurrence, but that didn't make it any less impressive. A few watched on in awe as the Princess of the Night visibly strained herself - as powerful as she was, the amount of energy needed to create an actual star was astonishing, and simply creating one star often left her completely exhausted. There was a brief flash of light, and Luna collapsed to the ground with a groan, the storm of magic ceasing almost immediately. One of her guards calmly walked to her side and helped her to her hooves, the stallion grinning as he escorted her back to the throne. "Another one, your Majesty?"

"Y-yes." She still felt weak from the endeavor and sat upon the throne with a sigh, giving the guard a nod of appreciation in return. "I'm sure it'll be less strenuous every time I do it."

"Considering you've made most of the other stars up there at one point or another, I'd say you're right. Would you like some water, Luna?"

"Yes please." The young Princess smiled and slowly nodded, rubbing one of her temples with a hoof. The guardsman gave her a salute and turned to fetch her a glass of water, and it didn't take long for him to return with a glass carefully balanced upon his back - at the very least, the royal guards were incredibly efficient. Luna took the glass from him and drank the entire thing in just a few moments, quickly sating her thirst. She carefully set the glass down upon the floor and turned to the stallion once more. "There's a flyer laying on my desk. Would you mind bringing it and some of my pencils out here?"

The guardsman saluted her once more and trotted off to retrieve the flyer for her, returning soon afterwards and placing both the flyer and the pencils at her hooves. Luna nodded appreciatively and conjured up a tiny table for her to work on, placing the flyer and her supplies on it. With a pencil in her mouth, she slowly worked, adding bits and pieces to the flyer. For the most part, it was finished, and yet parts of it still felt missing. One of her guards leaned over to look at the flyer, cocking his head as he looked at it. "So what kind of time frame are you working with, Luna?"

She spat out the pencil and sat up, blinking at him. "...Time frame?"

"Well, yeah. Camps usually have a time frame. Most are only open for a week at a time or so, some go for an entire month." The Princess frowned with disappointment upon hearing that, causing the guard to laugh. "You didn't even think about that, did you?"

"I hadn't even considered it. Thank you." She leaned down and picked up the pencil once more, staring at the flyer as she thought about how long her camp should even be open. A month seemed far too long, but a week seemed much more manageable. At the bottom of the flyer, underneath the activities, she added another line.

Open from July 1st through July 8th

Luna spat out the pencil once more, picking up the flyer with her magic and staring at it. With everything she had added to it, it seemed much more eye-catching now - she was bound to get some ponies interested now! All that remained was finding a decent place to put the flyer. Canterlot was out of the question, as the only ponies she would likely get from there would be far too snooty to appreciate what she would try to teach. The only other place she could think of was...

"Ponyville!"

One of the guardsman turned to look over his shoulder, raising an eyebrow at her. "...your Majesty?"

"Sorry. Thinking aloud." She giggled nervously and quickly returned to her thinking. Ponyville would be perfect. All of the ponies there were wonderfully kind, and though things had a rocky start during her visit on Night Mare Night, everything turned out just fine. "I need one of you to run an errand for me, preferably a pegasus."

One of the guards, an older stallion, turned and approached the throne, bowing before Luna. "What do you need, milady?"

She sighed. Of all the things she could be called, she hated 'milady' and 'ma'am' the most. She knew it was simply a sign of respect, but they both made her feel old. This particular guard had done it countless times, and Luna had simply given up on trying to correct him. "I need something delivered. Do you know of Ditzy Doo, in Ponyville?"

"I do, your Majesty. One of the mail mares, right?"

"Indeed. Take this to her - it's for her, and her alone. Simply give the flyer to her, she'll know what to do from there." Luna was about to hand off the flyer to him, but the stallion prepared to grab it with his mouth. Instead, she used her magic to fold up the flyer and lift the guardsman's helmet, carefully placing the flyer underneath before setting it back down upon his head. "There. Now I know you won't lose it. Travel safely."

The stallion sighed and shook his head, quickly leaving the throne room to deliver the package. He had been reduced from guard duty to being an errand boy for Princess Luna.

His children would never let him live this down.

-----

It was an odd thing to wake up to, but not entirely unexpected either. Ditzy Doo had ended up having a chance encounter with Princess Luna during her visit on Night Mare Night, and it had somehow ended with the gray mare writing a letter to the Princess the very next day. Much to her surprise, Luna replied back, and the two had kept in-touch since then. It had even culminated with Ditzy being appointed as Luna's personal representative within the Equestrian Postal Service, something the mail mare was highly proud of - the pay boost was certainly appreciated too.

This latest letter was interesting, though. It had been delivered during the night, no doubt by one of Luna's royal guards, and it wasn't a letter at all. Rather, it was a flyer for a camp of some sort. Ditzy gently placed it upon her kitchen table and took a sip of coffee from her mug. Sparkler had already taken Dinky off to school, which was somewhat of a relief to the mail mare. It meant she wouldn't have to explain the letter, or how she knew the Princesses as well as she did. Those were stories best left for another time.

With her coffee mug in the sink, Ditzy threw on her saddlebags and placed the flyer safely within. She would get her route and packages for the day soon enough, but for now, she had something more important to attend to - after all, this was royal business. After locking up her house for the day, the gray mare set off for Ponyville's town square, taking flight and arriving at her destination in just a few short moments. She was a common fixture for many of the citizens, and so few paid any real attention to her. That would do just fine. The pegasus pulled the flyer out of her saddlebags and pinned it to one of the posts near the town hall, smiling as she smoothed out some of the wrinkles.

"As artistic as always, your Majesty."

Her job complete, Ditzy Doo took off once more and made her way towards the Ponyville Post Office. Given the tasks Luna sometimes asked her to complete, it was good that few ponies ever paid attention to her.

With any luck, that attention would be redirected towards the flyer.

-----

Delivery received. Message posted.

Hope you get some bites, Luna.

Your faithful servant,
Ditzy Doo

P.S. The 'bites' refers to your flyer, not the donuts.

"Still looking at your letter, little sister?"

"Hm? Yeah. Back to our lesson, I suppose." It had been a week since receiving it, but Luna carefully folded up the letter and set it aside, returning to the task in front of her. At Celestia's own request, the young Princess was currently giving her elder sibling an art lesson. Celestia's room was far more spacious than Luna's, and made for a much better working environment - there was plenty of room for two easels, as well as the various paints and brushes they would need to use. "Okay, so... first of all, when painting, don't use magic."

Celestia turned and blinked at her little sister. "Don't... use magic? Why not?"

"Because, 'Tia. Using non-physical means to move the brush affects how the painting looks and feels. You might not notice it now, but as you paint more and more often, you definitely will." Luna smiled and was already beginning to sort through the various tubes of paint at her side, looking through them and picking out the colors she wanted to use.

"So... what? I just pick up the brush with my mouth?" The elder sister was eying the paint brush curiously, and she carefully leaned down and grabbed the tool with her mouth, mumbling out another response. "Lik' dis?"

The Princess of the Night sat up and caught sight of it, causing her to giggle in return. "Yes, Celestia. Just like that. I know it seems rather silly, but you'll understand soon enough. And... don't worry about the talking thing - you'll get better at it. Now, once you have your brush and your canvas is properly set up, pick out your first paint and-"

Thud.

Celestia dropped her brush and leaned over to search for the source of the sound. "Did you hear that too, Luna? Or am I just hearing things?"

"Nah, I heard it too. I think I know what caused it as well. Hold on." Luna stood up and wandered over to her sister's balcony, opening the doorway and peering down at the new arrival. "Ditzy, you know we have a front door, right?"

"Oh, I know! I have something for you, though." Ditzy Doo opened one of her saddlebags and pulled out a letter, giving it to Luna. The gray mare gave the Princess a salute, though only one of her eyes managed to actually remain focused on her.

The young Princess sighed and temporarily set the letter aside, slowly approaching the mail mare. "Ditzy, I thought I told you to get your eye looked at? I mean... doesn't that interfere with your flying at all?"

"What, this?" Ditzy pointed at her bad eye and simply shrugged. "I've gotten used to it. I'm legally blind in that eye, but the worst it's done is affect my depth perception. I've gotten used to it, though! Um... mostly, anyways."

"Mostly? Ditzy, you ran into my sister's balcony." Luna sighed once more and rubbed her face with one of her hooves before giving the mail mare a gentle pat on the back. "I'm going to have a bonus check sent out to you so you can get that eye of yours taken care of. You'll still have plenty of money to keep your family covered. Sound good?"

Ditzy's face scrunched up slightly, and Luna wasn't sure if the mail mare was going to laugh or cry. She settled for a smile instead, leaning over to give the Princess a light hug. "Oh, thank you Luna! I wish there was something I could do to make it up to you!"

"Nonsense." The Princess of the Night laughed softly and returned the hug, breaking away from it to look at Ditzy. "The work you do for me is payment enough. Now go ahead and get going. I'm sure there's more mail for you to deliver back in Ponyville."

The gray mare smiled and nodded, bidding Luna farewell as she took off to return to Ponyville. The young Princess was pleased with herself - it always filled her with joy to see her subjects so happy. She turned to pick up her letter once more, but noticed that it was gone. Frantic, she glanced about all over the balcony, searching for it. Was it possible that the wind had picked it up and carried it off? Or maybe it had-

"Huh. Interesting."

Celestia. Luna turned to look back into Celestia's quarters, and there was the letter, being read by her elder sister. She quickly made her way back inside, taking the letter from her sister. "You could have asked before you started to read through my mail."

"Sorry, dear sister. Curiosity got the best of me." The white alicorn grinned and shrugged, and the younger sibling simply sighed before holding the letter in front of herself and looking it over. It looked like it was the sign-up sheet for her summer camp. She eagerly began to read through the list, stopping to look at each of the names on it.

1. Pip

Luna giggled and grinned - Pipsqueak the Pirate, as she remembered him. He had been horribly frightened of her on Night Mare Night, but managed to turn things around before her visit was over. She was even his 'favorite Princess ever', something she had particularly enjoyed hearing. Compliments were few and far between, especially when you had the kind of reputation she did. The young Princess proceeded down the list once more.

2. Twilight Sparkle

How perfect! Though Twilight certainly wasn't a foal by any means, she and Luna both had many of the same interests, and it was hardly surprising to see her on the list. No doubt she had signed up because of the astronomy, but she'd likely enjoy the other activities just the same. There were more names on the list, however, and Luna continued to browse through the names.

3. Applejack
4. Fluttershy
5. Rainbow Dash
6. Pinkie Pie
7. Rarity

The Princess blinked. Seeing Pip and Twilight on the list wasn't a shock at all, but these other names truly perplexed her. She knew they were the other Elements of Harmony, and Twilight Sparkle's friends. Yet, as far as Luna knew, none of them had any interest at all in the activities she had planned for the camp. Why would they sign up for something they probably wouldn't enjoy?

"You luk confoosed, lil' sister." Celestia was attempting to talk with a paint brush in her mouth, but she did well enough that Luna managed to understand.

"Because I am, 'Tia. You saw the list, right?" The elder sibling nodded, and Luna continued. "I understand Pip and Twilight signing up, but why would the others sign up too? As far as I know, none of them like astronomy, reading, painting, or drawing. Why would they sign up for my camp if there isn't anything they're interested in?"

Celestia spat out the paint brush in her mouth and eyed her work thus far - the entire time Luna had been gone and talking with Ditzy Doo, she had managed to paint... a circle. She smirked and slowly shook her head, turning to face her younger sister. "Knowing them, they probably only signed up because Twilight Sparkle did. For all we know, they might end up discovering something new about themselves while at your camp. Sometimes that's all it takes to find something you love to do."

Luna stared blankly at her sister for a moment, then sighed. "How'd you manage to figure that one out?"

"Because Twilight Sparkle is my personal student, dear sister. It'd be awful silly of me not to know how her and her friends act, wouldn't it?" Celestia smiled in return, beckoning her sibling back over to the easels. "C'mon, Luna. I think you still owe me an art lesson."

"Very well. I'll worry about the list later." The Princess of the Night returned to the easel at Celestia's side and took a seat upon the floor, picking up her own paint brush and talking out of the side of her mouth - unlike her sibling, she'd had plenty of practice, and was capable of speaking quite clearly. "Now then, you pick out your first paint, which I see you've already done. And from there, you simply... paint. Do what you want. Just don't forget to wash the brush off when switching colors, so you don't mix them."

Celestia mumbled a response back, something akin to an 'Uh huh', and the two sisters both painted away. The group of campers that had signed up was... interesting, to say the least. It would liven things up, anyways. She would worry about that later, though. For now, she had something much more important to take care of.

Namely, getting her sister to stop mixing the paints.

Comments

[Vargras]

I actually held a pen in my mouth and talked to myself, just so I could get Celestia's speech right in this one.

Now to see if anyone misinterprets that comment before reading.

[Nugt2018]

91463 so your saying you had a dick in your mouth to get Celestia's speach right?

[Vargras]

91491
A pen. PEN.

[BlankFlankBrony]

91491 Must be a really small private eye if he can hold it in his mouth.

[Karrakaz]

I've said it before and I'll say it again:
thanks for writing a story that's good, funny and doesn't involve the possible end of equestria

If your parents never had children, chances are you won't, either.~Dick Cavett

hard to image the allmighty fuhrer of equestria doing something mundane as painting
(yes i know she isnt a "tyrant" but i felt like saying it!"

i'd laugh if she turned out painting the next monet or picasso or something

[jamlamin]

91492 regarding the post you 'd at, that was such a post it hurt.
Anyway, I liked Hiatus, and find it pleasing that you continued in that universe. Please continue.

[Meta Knight]

great

[Vargras]

Next chapter will delve a bit into Celestia.

[Ice]

Nice one I loved the prequel and I'm loving this kinda weird how nobody else signed up I mean at least some other random campers

[Vargras]

94544
I wouldn't expect many kids to sign up for a camp that has nothing but astronomy, reading, drawing, and painting.

[Ice]

94748 I would sign up because of the astronomy and reading art not so much cause I love astronomy and reading and gaming (I'm a nerd deal with it)

[Therizzen]

95292
You've also got to take into account the fact that Ponyville isn't all that big a town, I'd view it more as a glorified village than anything else.

Also, sad to say, but seeing as the radio and the telephone were only created last year, I highly doubt they have any form of game station. Us nerds are left out in that aspect I guess... ;-;
(By the way, if anyone reads that and catches the reference, then you get brownie points )

94060
Now, onto the matter at hand:
Why in the world have I not commented on this?

Well, for starters, I can't see why I'm surprised about Luna's new 'hobby'. It only makes sense, I mean, she is pretty much the goddess of the night. Yet, I wouldn't really call it a hobby, because that makes it sound tedious and unimportant. She is making stars, which in essence are giant, molten balls of assorted substances and elements. Along with stars comes red giants, super novas and the occasional black hole - I would classify it more along the lines of an extreme sport. Think of the fics and what happens when Twilight looses focus and screws up a spell, now think about what could happen if Luna does that exact same thing. The consequences would be much greater, I can assure you that.

Next is the Ditzy Doo thing, and I have to say that that was pretty heart warming, I'm not sure how other authors write Derpy - I tend to stay away from stories focusing on her - but I enjoy the way you do it. She is just your normal average mare, with the exception of a lazy eye of course, no mental disability to be heard of. Now you set her up as having a relationship with Luna, who then goes and gives her the money to pay for eye surgery, or something of the like? Well that is extremely kind of Luna, and if it wasn't shown already, it really adds to her personality you've built. Especially to people who haven't read Hiatus, shows she's compassionate and caring and the like.

And now you have Celestia coming up in the next chapter? Hmm... We have seen little bits and pieces of her in your writing so far, but mainly in Luna's perspective. From what you've shown so far, she seems like quite the tease, but it will be nice to see how you flesh out her character and build on what you already have.

I eagerly await the next chapter

[Vargras]

95612
Okay, so it's not really a 'hobby'. It's still tedious, considering she can really only make one per night, but it's still important work. And though Twilight may be powerful, I'm pretty sure she can't make stars from scratch. As for the Ditzy Doo thing, my own headcanon has her as simply having an eye disorder, which also affects her depth perception and coordination. Leads to the 'Ditzy' part of her name. Other than that, she's completely normal. In regards to her relationship with Luna, she was gone for a thousand years. She doesn't really have any ties of her own, and the ones she does have are probably exceptionally strong.

And yep, more Celestia! I will say that it's a teensy bit darker (akin to the lucid dreaming about Luna's childhood during the Hearth's Warming Eve bonus chapter), but nothing too serious. While Hiatus itself was definitely all about Luna, I'm trying to spread it out more with this fic. Might even throw in an interlude later on that's about Celestia, and no one else.

[GrayFox2510]

I think you said in your blog here that people are saying this story isn't living up to Hiatus because, well... Let's face it, it's a different story. Sure, they are related, but the concept is entirely different despite being in the same continuity.
Regardless, I'm enjoying it (particularly those bits with Celly and Luna talking and overall just being your average sisters) for what it is, and hope to see more of this soon. =3

[Vargras]

95980
Nah, I never said that. All I said was that the success Hiatus had was a complete and total fluke, and I doubt I'll be able to ever recreate that.

At the very least, it's built me up a nice little base of readers - namely, you guys.

[GrayFox2510]

95982
Oh, I wouldn't call it a fluke. Sure, it might have been at a good time, but it became popular because it was good, it was quite entertaining, to say the least.
And I'm sure you can recreate it. Maybe not this story (but I hope you do, and even better), maybe not the next (assuming there's one, please do one next too), but it'll happen.

[Vargras]

95994
Nah, a lot of it was due to the old fimfiction layout. Any time a story was updated, it was reposted on the front page for everyone to see. If your story got featured, any updates put it right back up in the featured box again. Those two contributed a lot to how many views I've gotten.

[Vargras]

Will write more tomorrow, and maybe get this chapter out as well. Dunno yet.

[Ice]

95612 gimmie the brownies I got it

[Ice]

95982 I don't think it was a fluke I think it's just people understood it better because it had happend while this is an off topic subject and by that I mean hiatus used the first episode of the seaspn to make the story while this uses a refernce from one episode so I think hiatus was just better formed at the start is basiclay what I'm saying

[The Jack]

Hurrdidurr. I expected the CMC to pop up on that list too! xD
But yush, I get to read about Pip! I have read far too little fanfics about him. xD

[oblivion2k]

91492
Did you buy your pen from penisland.com?

[RealityCheck]

Pet Peeve: Canon, Celestia controls the sun, Luna controls the moon. They're not infinite, nor omnipotent, and not Godlike creators--- it's canon that the world and the universe it is in existed long before them (the sun was even raised and lowered by "mortal" unicorns). And it's pretty well implied that, other than their world being a geocentric solar system, the rest of the universe is normal. Giving Luna the power to create and control stars makes her a few bazillion times more powerful than Celestia.

[Super_Big_Mac]

123519

It is not a solar system if it is geocentric. It is, as far as my science teacher is concerned, a "Terra System" or "Geo System". The sun would be around 3/4ths the size of the planet, the moon less than half. The planet would need it's own form of geothermal heat for anything to be able to live, and how the devil does the air stay on the planet? Our atmosphere is there because of the Earth's rotation. Their planet's atmosphere would have to be the work of magic.

[rexpup]

IT'S DERPY!!! </rage> Anyway, I like this story, overall.

[StatusQo]

ooo, i hated when people mix the paint when i was little

[Samusbot]

124685 In my own headcanon, the Sun and Moon are kept in place along their respective orbits by the powerful residual magic of Equestria (the planet), and just slow to a stop due to this magic without Celestia and Luna (or many many unicorns) adding magic to keep them moving.

[Klice]

Hehe, I don't know why I didn't see this story as I loved Hiatus. Well, I shall correct this mistake !

I hope you haven't made Luna completely clueless.. It's nice to see her struggle with modern thing or social matters, but she's still millennia old and a ruler ! (I think about the "time frame" joke. Twas funny but...). It's just a little complaint, nothing to worry about !

[Pegasus_Feathers]

184043 I prefer Ditzy. Derpy sounds more like a mean nickname. :/

[Draco Dei]

I was very much surprised that it was just the ONE flier. I expected her to had it off to the Royal Printers and at least a hundred posted around various cities. Interesting that Rarity, AJ, and Pinkie Pie took the vacation time. I guess it makes sense, especially if they saw that not many were signing up. Still not seeing how this will match up to the story description, since I would think that the Mane Six wouldn't cause the sorts of trouble that would make "Camp Councilor" the operative challenging role. Maybe I am forgetting something from "Hiatus".

[Ghost Pony Rider]

Two fanfictions all about Luna, and no mention of batponies makes me dull reader... 😔

But I praise you work anyways.