Cling!
Trixie started awake, the metallic clash scaring her right out of the shallow slumber she was enduring. She looked up towards the source of the sound, none other than Princess Twilight herself. Twilight towered over the little filly, glaring down at her. Trixie was laying on a tattered blanket, barely enough to fit her hooves while tucked under herself. Despite the small blanket, and pony, the cage containing the beast was big enough for Trixie to stand up to move forward and back two steps.
“Wake up already! Pets don't sleep in, idiot. You have an incredible amount of work to do before the girls come over tonight.” said Twilight, pointing towards the door of the basement which had become Trixie's new home.
Trixie quickly wiped away the sleep from her eyes with a hoof as she rose in the cage, a yawn escaping soon after.
“Sorry Princess, I didn't… I didn’t mean to.” Muttered Trixie, staring at the ground hoping to avoid Twilights scowl.
Twilights scowl only intensified, she had almost no patience for the filly. Trixie just exuded annoyance, her crimes and acts still raw in Twilights mind. The same could not be said for Trixie, her mind was wiped with the spell that made her into a filly. This was on purpose, of course. Twilight knew what she was doing, and punishing an innocent filly for the crimes of another mare was just that much sweeter.
“No excuses, Trixie. Get going unless you want a strike so early in the morning?” Threatened Twilight. Trixie rushed through the hatch that Twilight had opened while she was speaking.
“No! Please no Princess, I’m ready to work, honest!” panicked Trixie.
She trotted to the doorway of the room, avoiding the junk and storage supplies that crowded it. Twilight followed close behind watching the filly exerting herself just to walk fast enough to keep up. Trixie's hair was a lot more frazzled now than it used to be as an adult. Her fur wasn’t as smooth and glowing, even her eyes seemed a bit more dull. Her collar looked fantastic, though, thought Twilight. It was a deep purple, matching her owners coat, with a small diamond shaped charm engraved with Trixies name on it. On the back, the charm had Twilights name and castle address, in case Trixie ever got lost. The salespony at the pet store insisted this was an important thing to have, he claimed that dogs got lost all the time around these parts.
“Umm… what should I do first, Miss Twilight?” asked Trixie, her eyes locked on the floor. Twilight smirked a bit, she was too afraid to even look at her owner. There was still work to be done, but she was already seeing plenty of rewards for it. Twilight stopped in her tracks, raising a hoof to her face and sighing.
“You ask the same question every time, stupid. You're supposed to look at the list right in front of your muzzle and check. Seriously its like youre trying to get on my nerves.” sighed Twilight. She moved her hoof from her face, allowing her to look at Trixie who flinched at the sudden movement. Twilight smirked a lot more at that.
“Get started already, I’ll be going out for supplies and I expect most of the list to be done by the time I get back.” said Twilight, leaving the room.
Trixie listened as her hoofsteps grew softer and softer, and finally the boom of the castle doors. Twilight scared her, she had such a short fuse! Because of this Trixie tried her best to be a good pet, last time she got 3 strikes she could barely walk for two days. It was a vicious cycle, as more punishments led to more difficult accomplishing tasks. As a result, Twilight gave her 2 strikes over that period for moving too slowly. Just one more strike and Twilight would not be kind, but Trixie knew it was for the best. Trixie knew that she wasn't very smart, or useful, or even pretty for that matter. She was nothing when compared to her owner. Trixie knew that very well, but it was okay. That's what she told herself, at least. Twilight would help her become a good pet. The best pet!
With that thought, Trixie steeled herself for lots of chores and looked up at the list. The first thing on the list was a small picture of a broom, and next to it was a picture of the kitchen. “Clean the kitchen!” thought Trixie, smiling a bit because she liked being there. The kitchen was off limits to pets, but Trixie liked seeing how complicated pony food was. Twilight ate all kinds of foods, lots of different colors and shapes. This was in stark contrast to pet food, Trixie knew. Pet food was… red? Trixie was still learning her colors, but she was pretty sure red was correct. Colors were not her strong suit, but shapes came naturally. Twilight put different sticker shapes on Trixies tools to help her tell them apart. She was very organized like that, thought Trixie fondly.
After climbing the stairs she started her journey while looking around, she never tired of how pretty Miss Twilights home was. Before she knew it she was looking at the door to the kitchen.
“HEY! Trixie is that you?!” shouted a voice from the room adjacent, startling Trixie into dropping the bucket she was holding in her teeth. She scrambled to pick up the various tools and cleaning liquids that were now scattered all over the floor. Circle water… square water…. Triangle water… brush… Trixies mental checklist was interrupted as Spike stomped nearby, approaching the rushing filly before crossing his arms and locking eyes with her.
“I asked you a question, Trixie.” spat Spike, his gaze unrelentingly strong.
“Oh! Uh.. yes it is Trixie! That’s me...” mumbled Trixie quickly, forcing a nervous smile onto her face. Spike never punished Trixie, but she knew that he didn't like her at all and that was reason enough to avoid him.
“I thought I told the stupid little pet to stay away from the library.” said Spike, punctuating his sentence with a poke to Trixies forehead, just barely missing her sensitive horn. Trixie took some steps backward, putting her little pail on the floor in front of her in order to speak.
“I wasn't going to the library Mr. Spike… I’m s’posed to clean the kitchen, see.” replied Trixie softly, gesturing to the pail on the floor. She hoped Spike believed her, Spike had lied to Twilight before, telling her that Trixie had broken one thing or another. He would probably tell on her again, Twilight would think that she entered the library, and that would be strike 3! She felt the need to support her story.
“I even brought the triangle water, see! That one is only for metal stoves and stuff, not… not bookshelves.” said Trixie, she had learned that the hard way when she tried to clean a wooden stool with it, it started smoking! Trixie shuddered at the memory, that one cost her a long time out, she could still feel the flames licking at her hooves.
“It's not triangle water, dumbfuck. Its called detergent, which you would know if you could read.” Laughed Spike, pointing at the bottle in her pail. Trixie flinched at the bad word, and then looked down at the bottle as she started to tear up.
Its okay Trixie, its okay, just go clean and then leave…
Trixie picked up her pail once again and went into the kitchen, wiping her tears when Spike couldn't see her anymore. She looked around the kitchen, the sink was full of dishes with various bowls and utensils. Finally, the countertop was a mess, a fine layer of grime mixed with the white of flour. After taking a moment to compose herself, she placed the pail on the floor and retrieved the stepstool from the small storage closet. Twilight allowed her to use this stool to stand on when she couldn't reach anything. Trixie was very lucky, if her owner wasn't nice enough to let her use a stool, she would have an incredible amount of trouble cleaning well. Pets aren't allowed on the furniture, she knew. In no time at all Trixie got in the groove of cleaning, clearing the surfaces and spraying everything with her bottles. She rubbed the towel over the countertop and was satisfied with the shine after a bit of effort. She grinned, happy to think that she was useful.
I hope Miss Twilight likes my cleaning, last time she gave me headpats! Maybe this time she’ll do it again!
Trixie began humming softly, a simple tune she heard a bird sing once. Her memory was weak so she made up most of it, maybe someday she could see the bird and teach it her version. Her mind wandered as she finished up the plates in the sink, she thought of how nice it would be to go outside more often. She could see birds, and more ponies, and maybe meet other pets! Twilight spoke about the magic of friendship a lot, and even though Trixie didn't know much about magic, she knew lots about Twilight. Twilight loves friendship and books, as well as a clean home. Making friends with another pet would probably make her owner happy. And if Twilight likes something, then it must be really awesome! Sadly, Trixie wasn't allowed to touch books so she couldn't learn the wonders of those mysterious objects. It was okay though, Trixie trusted Twilight, so she didn't have to use a book to know that they were as awesome as Twilight said.
“Try to focus!” said Trixie, tapping herself on the forehead with a wet hoof since she noticed that all the dishes were done. She had been standing on her stool for a while, doing nothing, wasting valuable time daydreaming about making a friend. Trixie rushed to put the stool back and put all the supplies into her pail, before trotting through the doorway into the hallway, and eventually back to her room. The list on the wall had another two tasks to do, but they were easier than cleaning a whole kitchen. She decided to take out the trash first, and then polish the table.. Map.. thing that was in the room with the big doors. Twilight spent time there a lot, with other ponies. Trixie only knew because she could hear the ponies come through the front door from her cage. She wasn't allowed out while ponies came in.
Trixie grabbed a small cart that was in the basement and hitched it to herself as best as she could. Tying things was very difficult for Trixie, but she managed to tie it enough for her use. She galloped room to room, collecting each waste basket and putting it in her cart. There were a lot of them, but she finished quickly and was proud of herself for it. Spike seemed to be in his room, the castle only as loud as Trixies own hoofsteps. She approached the last room she needed, it was a room with a big table in the middle and chairs surrounding it. This was a very important room, Trixie knew. Twilight was here a lot, so Trixie would deliver drinks and things to her here often. Today she was here to dust though, killing two pegasi with one boulder, or something like that, thought Trixie. She packed up the waste bin into her cart and pushed it to the corner. After retrieving the feather duster, she began cleaning each throne meticulously from top to bottom.
Her mouth was starting to get tired, she had been cleaning all day but she knew that she had no time for a break. From what she could tell, the sun would be setting soon and Twilight would be home and ready to punish Trixie if she wasn't done with her chores. Twilight expected Trixie to be waiting in the cage by the time she got home, and Trixie didn't want to disappoint her.
She didn't need another strike, not at all. With that thought she hurried, her hooves moving as fast as they could. The crystal shone almost unnaturally bright after Trixie was through, but Trixie could tell that the table wasn't as bright in comparison. She wasn't allowed to touch the table, that was made very clear to her. But cleaning it doesn't count as touching, not at all. Twilight would be happy if she polished it! The ponies who visited would compliment her on her beautiful table, and then Twilight would reward Trixie! Trixie started running the feather duster over it, thinking about the various rewards Twilight could give her. She stood on her hind legs to reach the table, bracing herself with one hoof and using the duster with the other. She stretched further trying to reach the center of the table, standing on the tip of her hooves. Just a little more…..
“And I told him, where am I supposed to get 37 kilos of baking soda in the middle of yakyakistan?” laughed a bubbly voice from the doorway of the throne room. In fear Trixies back hooves slipped and she fell on her face, smacking her horn on the edge of the table on her way down. She didn't know whether to hold her aching nose or her ringing horn, choosing to nurse her horn she moaned in pain.
“Oh my gosh! Are you okay?! That was a crazy tumble, little filly!” screamed a pink mare, the one with the bubbly voice. She was already holding Trixie in her hooves, seemingly bending space to the point where Trixie did not remember being lifted. The mare ran her hoof through Trixies mane, cooing and then wiping away the tears that were forming on her eyes..
“You.. you scared me..” sniffled Trixie, looking away from the strange mare.
“Awwwww you are just the cutest! I’m Pinkie Pie! What’s your name? What are you doing in the castle?” said Pinkie Pie, with the biggest smile Trixie had ever seen. This wasn't all that impressive because she hadn't seen many before. Twilight and Spike didn't smile that often, but she knew Pinkies was massive. In a flash it turned into a scowl, only Trixies confusion preventing her from panicking at what would surely be a punishment.
“WAIT! What are you doing in the cutie map room? Wait!! Are you a burglar?! Are you trying to steal my chair?!” questioned Pinkie, shaking the filly softly as she held her a hoofs length away from herself.
“N-no, I was just cleaning them…. I promise. Please dont tell Princess Twilight, I wasn’t trying to steal anything Miss Pinkie Pie!” said Trixie, after analyzing the river of words that she was slammed with. Trixie didn't know this mare, so she was going to try her best to get on her good side lest she complain to Twilight.
“And, um, my name is Trixie. I belong to Princess Twilight Sparkle. My address is on my collar.” Blurted Trixie, catching her breath after what seemed to be an automated message. Trixie didn't know where that came from, but pinkie seemed to have triggered her to say it.
“Oooh!! That was a cool voice! I can do one too! Dear Princess Celestia, today I met Trixie!” shouted Pinkie, the voice was more of a scream than anything. While Pinkie was screaming, Trixie tried to wiggle out of her grasp hoping to run to her cage. Pinkie stopped just in time to come to her senses.
“Now that that's over, I wonder when the girls are gonna show up!” said Pinkie, placing the filly back down on her hooves. She was successful in distracting Trixie from the pain, all according to plan.
“The girls?” inquired Trixie, looking up at Pinkie and tilting her head slightly.
“My friends, silly!” said Pinkie, booping Trixie softly on her nose, “Twilight, Rarity, Dashie and Fluttershy. I bet you know Twilight at least.”
Darn
Trixie turned and grabbed the feather duster from the table behind her, and galloped to the cart, hitching herself as quickly as her tiny hooves could move the buckles. When the final buckle clicked into place she pulled the cart out of the room. Leaving Pinkie just staring at how desperate she was to leave. Trixie was about to reach the front door of the castle, aiming for the door off to the right that led to the basement, when she crashed straight into another pony. The garbage in the cart went flying as Trixie went head over hooves launching the contents straight at the pony that she collided with.
Trixie opened her eyes, the world upside down and a towering pony stood above her, the ponies pink striped mane stood out against the deep blue color of the rest of it. The mares horn glowed, showering the room in a deep magenta light. In a flash, the garbage and cart was gone, leaving the filly laying on the ground on her back.
“Go to your room, Trixie. I’ll be there shortly.” said Twilight calmly, not even looking at the filly who had begun shivering at the mere sound of Twilights collected voice. Too afraid, she stood as still as she could. This lasted only moments until Twilight grabbed her in her magic and raised Trixie to eye level. With fire in her eyes, Twilight looked the tiny filly right in the eye and spoke again,
“Don't make me repeat myself, Trixie, I'm not sure you'd survive the consequences.” Whispered Twilight as Trixie burst into tears. Twilight put the crying filly down, and it immediately dashed to the basement doorway. A trail of tear drops punctuating every sob that emanated from her, both fear and immense disappointment in herself fueling her distress.
Trixie made it to the basement, seeing through blurry eyes and walking on shaky hooves. With the last of her strength she threw herself into the cage, grabbing her tattered blanket and hugging it for the only bit of comfort it could provide.
The wire of the cage bit into her side, and her tears pooled around her head. She didn't know much, but she knew Twilight was a good teacher.
Twilight had already taught Trixie the true meaning of fear, but tonight Twilight was aiming for something different.
Punishment.
You're welcome
child abuse... ok seems legit. poor trix!
8995117
lol ikr xD
9011418
Well, its foal abuse but yeah. Thanks for reading!
9012456
Omg XD
Hmm... interesting idea. Not bad so far, but I can't help but feel that there's something missing from this cruel little scenario. I feel like if I were this particular Twilight, I would want to leave a fragment or two of the old Trixie in this helpless filly. Knowing that she would be aware of what had happened to her but being unable to do anything about it because of the spell, and being forced to admit to herself that the other mare is the superior magician, would be so much more delicious to me.
9013527
Thats a delicious idea, I totally agree! But, im going more for the torture of an innocent Trixie, for Twilights enjoyment. Twilight sort of 'killed' the old Trixie, by wiping her memories. Twilight finds it more satisfying to punish this filly for the crimes of another.
I do like your idea though!
9014977
Will there be spanking in this?
9015622
Uhh, I dont think so. I mean, there could be, but I was planning on more harsh punishments. Like, harsher punishments. I could consider putting some in later if thats something you'd like to see.
Thanks for reading!
The mental regression came without warning. It really undermines the entire point of punishing Trixie or any of the events in the last chapter to just erase adult Trixie into a blank slate.
9017974
Well, its more delicious to punish an innocent filly, dont you think? The filly Trixie never did anything to deserve such cruel punishment, which just makes it better.
9018019
It's crueler, but not punishment. The first chapter basically ends with Twilight executing Trixie with a promise to build a filly clone from her body parts (except that we're tricked into believing that Twilight is just going to deage Trixie, or at least I was).
9018027
Okay, cool! The innocent filly is still getting punished though, like she is still being subjected to torture.
9018025
Probably with Trixie's own money, as a nice loophole that'd allow for lots of killing ponies that need punishment. Although I'm not too clear on the setup here, really, and thus also how much money Trixie would have.
9018031
Yeah, the law part of this is gonna be explained a bit more in chapter 4/5. Specifically the rules, and what sort of priveleges Trixie gets.
9018019
Dude, get help. You are literally saying that you're getting off on child abuse.
9027625
Trixie is not a child dude, thats a filly. I appreciate your concern though.
9027784
Stop being cute with the filly/child thing. The ponies serve as “people” in these stories, which makes a filly the same as a child.
I’m not someone who goes around scolding people for writing porn or fetish stories. You like what you like. But this... This is just sick. The fact that, in the comments, you refer to this scenario as delicious, especially describing the victim here as being essentially innocent. The only purpose of this story is for you to describe abuse and torture of a child, and you describe it gleefully. That you’re deriving pleasure from fantasies like this is actually frightening, And that there are people here in the comments trying to normalize it is just gross.
I think the worst thing about this, even beyond the torture porn aspect, is how no character seems at all concerned about the abuse. Everyone is complicit, and you make Twilight, the moral center of the show, the chief torturer? Why even bother calling her Twilight Sparkle if she doesn’t act, think, or talk like the character? Just make your own OC, because that’s all she is here. You kind of tipped your hand when you had Twilight say almost exactly the same thing you said in the comments, re: how much sweeter it was to abuse a filly who was innocent of the crimes. This isn’t a story about Twilight exacting revenge; this is just you writing about how much you enjoy fantasizing about this stuff.
Can I ask you something? Why do you find the idea of punishing an innocent so “delicious”? Have you stopped to ask yourself why you think the thought of that is so appealing to you? Because you write it like you expect others to agree with that statement, and nobody with a working conscience ever would.
And please don’t play the “It’s fiction, and nobody is getting hurt” card. I realize this is fiction, but a story is an attempt by a writer to express a point of view. And for your first story that you show the world, the point of view you chose to convey is “I think torturing and abusing children is really, really hot.” That is literally the only message of this story.
9027831
Well, ill keep saying the filly thing cause Trixie is in fact a little cartoon horse! Believe it or not, I guess.
As for you finding it gross, thats totally fine man, you can think what you'd like. I'll do what I wanna do, and you can do the same. Seems like right now you're choosing to read my story, and get mad about it, on some sort of high horse. You're making a conscious decision to read this foal abuse, no ones forcing you to.
Having fantasies is not frightening, unless im literally writing about my plans to go commit actual murder. I can fantasize all I want and absolutely noone at all gets hurt. I don't see the issue there at all.
As for the characters, the only characters that have shown up so far are Twilight and Trixie, Pinkie has no idea whats actually going on, thats for future chapters. My dialogue is obviously not the best, this is my first fic ever, so I understand that criticism. Twilight is only slightly OOC, I think, because Twilight is shown to value justice as much as the next pony. This is just a more intense, hooves on sort of approach to this justice for what Trixie did to ponyville. I think youre forgetting that Trixie enslaved a whole town and then removed ponies body parts? I've yet to go even that far(Even though I will! )
My OC is far too cute to use on this story, I couldnt do her justice with my non existent skills. Twilight fits much better.
And sure, this is just me writing about how much I enjoy fantasizing about this stuff, Trixie is fun for that. In essence, though, isnt all writing like that? You fantasize a cool story or scenario and then you write it down, which I think is super cool!
I find the idea of punishing an innocent delicious cause its just... it makes the cruelty more intense. For the purpose of writing this story, it adds to whats going on. I want to make the story more interesting and making Trixie innocent helps that, (Also its fun for me )
If it seems like im writing becasue other people will agree with me, well thats not the case. I wrote it and then some people gave it some likes, and added it to their favorites. Seems to me like im not alone, and you seem to be the only one on here getting mad and stuff.
As for "I think torturing children is really really hot", tahts not true at all, I have zero attraction to children.
Foals are a whole other story though, they are so cute! Wouldn't you agree?
Finally, I remember someone saying "Dont wrestle in the mud with a pig, cause the pig likes it"
This is totally applicable right now, im having fun, and youre just wasting your own time. Go write your own fic man, or stay here and keep reading, the next chapter is gonna be lots of fun!!
9027831
No you're not the type of person to go around scolding people for their fetish stories, but you do harass them, and why use twilight when it doesn't act or behave anything like twilight, quite simply it's interesting to see characters act out of character, in similar vein to what if.
People have been enjoying stories of suffering since the beginning, it's nothing new, even happens a lot in modern mainstream media, and the only true issue in all of this is that you can't seem to understand that people can tell the difference between genuine suffering and fictional suffering, I could take you to a very dark part of the Internet, where people really can't tell the difference, the story isn't even finished you have no idea how it's even going to end, for all you know it could end on a good note, you don't know.
But ultimately you need to stop being a busybody, white knight and stop harassing, criticise the chapter, but wait until the stories finish before you do the whole thing, and at the end of the day you don't know hoov, you don't know exactly how he would feel if this ever happened to anyone in real life, but I do, stop making assumptions of people's character based on a fictional story, assumptions make an ass out of me and you
9027831
Look man, I understand where your coming from, I really do. But what you fail to understand is what you're saying yourself. Sure, writing a story is fantasizing and a way for somebody to write out what they fantasize about. I myself like to make particularly psychologically scaring stories, not because I actually want that stuff to happen in real life, it's just a way for me to see how I can play with the psychology of the mind. Not sure if that's what Hoov is trying to do, but that's what I like to do.
And your complaints about Hoov slandering Twilight's character seriously seems like your just mad somebody is writing a version of a character you may or may not like on a completely different page then you're familiar with, it's pathetic and pitiless. And it's just like 9028055 said, it's fun to just mess around with characters like this, it's more of a what if situation, and that's what makes it so fun is that you get to explore. Again, I am guilty of this, I freaking gave Diamond Tiara a literal blood-thirsty guardian angel and turned Starlight into freaking Ryuga of all people. And on top of all that, nobody except for waifu-fans are going to care about character slanderization. And that's not to say that it bothers me, it does, it's just that I'm more curious as to what Hoovie is going to do about it. And just as 9028035 said, this scenario definitely could happen, considering Twilight's fragile mind. And the facts he gives makes what Twilight is about to do to Trixie seem like foal's play in comparison.
As the last thing I'm going to talk about, is that you fail to see the absolute gem Hoovie stumbled upon. Now, while I'm no child psychologist by any stretch of the imagination, but I can see that Hoovie nailed the way Trixie thinks perfectly, a child would normally want to astray from any type of punishment, and would feel any type of pride when they think they've done a job that the adult figure in control of them would approve of. And that's why Trixie's breakdown in the end of this chapter so believable, it's a combination of disappointment and absolute primal fear of what Twilight will do to her. It's a built in mechanism in every living thing's mind to fear anything that's bigger than them, and angry, that they can't fight or run away from.
Overall, I understand exactly where you're coming from, but you fail to see what Hoovie means. And also, you have no business talking about psychology.