Inferno

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Twilight won't settle for anything less than a perfect gift for her girlfriend.

They have very different ideas about what that entails.

Entry to Everfree Northwest 2018's Iron Author contest, won second place. Prompt: Fire, Palpable, Brooch.

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 7 )

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JKinsley

JKinsley #1 · May 21st, 2018 · 2 · ·

First half: Oh, Twilight, no!
Second half: Oh, Sunset, no!

But they kissed and made up and it was as adorable as could be, so I suppose it works out.

aceina

aceina #2 · May 21st, 2018 · · ·

very good story why is it listed as incomplete thoe this seems like its just a 1 shot

and yea spending more money than you have on a gift is dumb

Rixec

Rixec #3 · May 21st, 2018 · 2 · ·

Aww, such a sweet tale with a good moral. Sunset and Twilight really make such a wonderful pair.

FanOfMostEverything

FanOfMostEverything #4 · May 21st, 2018 · 4 · ·

A beautiful moment. Although part of me can't help but think along different lines...

"Sunset, I built a device that can measure and extract energies that shouldn't exist in this universe. Also the seflie drone is selling like hotcakes. Money is no object."
"I still don't want you thinking you have to buy my love."
"Fair enough."

MythrilMoth

MythrilMoth #5 · May 23rd, 2018 · 2 · ·

Very...descriptive.

Almost overly so. A little too flowery romance novel for my tastes. I mean, obviously that's the point. It just feels like it's a bit too much of the style. Also, the constant "her girlfriend" thing over and over again starts to get on one's nerves after a while.

DrakeyC

DrakeyC #6 · May 23rd, 2018 · 2 · ·

8942393
If it helps, it was intentional for Twilight's third-person limited. Though yeah I needed more ways to refer to Sunset without her name.

ScisetShimmerEvan

ScisetShimmerEvan #7 · Sep 20th, 2021 · · ·

Did her girlfriend feel the same way? Twilight liked to think so. A fire like the one that was stoked in her heart every time they met was one that could not be confined to just one of the two. And yet, there was doubt. Who was Twilight to be with such a woman? She was a bookish wallflower, an asocial nerd. She was more comfortable in bed with a book than in a café on a date.

Imo I don't really think sci twi is a bookish wallflower at all and just a straight on nerd.

A sun goddess incarnate stood before her, wearing naught but black jeans and a red T-shirt. Her teal eyes ignited the familiar flames in Twilight’s chest and instantly made her short of breath. How her girlfriend had such an effect on her, science would never be able to explain.

Seems like sunset wasn't prepared with the proper outfit like twilight was but eh no one can always be perfect.

She huffed and slapped a hand to her forehead. “Twilight, you just bought me a shiny piece of metal with some rocks set in it, that costs more than the table it’s sitting on right now. Probably more than this sofa, too. I can’t accept this.” She put the lid back on the box.

Wow, I did not expect to see this coming.

“Happy anniversary, Twilight.”

Well at least everything worked out in the end which is great.

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