"Wow I've never been on a plane before," I said to Twilight because we were on a train to Canterlot which is a city that has Princess Celestia in it.
"Okay, but we need to get there on time or else we will be late," said Twilight who was pedaling to make the train go faster. I looked out the window and saw all the field grass and the sun was shining and the grass was singing and the birds and the air was flying through the air.
After a long wait of waiting the train finally made the train station. It stopped in the train station and I got off and fell on my face onto the nails from the floor boards. But it's okay because my glasses blocked the nails.
"Get up idiot, we have to go to Celestia." said Twilight who was using magic to pull my fingernails to drag me on the ground.
"Okay, fine," I said and I got up and we walked to the castle, there was a big sign on the castle that said "Castle" so that's how we knew it was a castle.
We went in the doors and went down the hallway and a bunch of guards threw spears at me but Twilight used a horn spell to make them fall asleep so they couldn't do that. However, one of the spears hit me in the shirt and made me fly through the hallway and I got flung into Princess Celestia's throne room from the spear.
"Who the fuck are you" said Princess Celestia.
"I'm detective jakkid166" I said as I pulled the spear out of my spear proof vest.
"Hes here to solve the case!" said Twilight who was also there.
"Oh. Okay, well, Mr. jakkid166, we need you to look at all the evidence we have got from the crime scene." said Celestia and she levitated a box into my face and opened it to show me the evidence, which was stuff.
"This is the evidence," said Princess Celestia. "First, there is a gun that the pony died with. Someone stabbed her with it."
"What, how did they do that?"
"She got stabbed by the bullet that came out of the gun after someone fired it."
"Oh okay what else?"
"There's nothing else."
"WHAT?" I said and I pulled out my gun and shot the window. "This is shit, how am I gonna solve this when the pony is in another WORLD?"
"That's where I can help you," said Twilight. "Celestia can use magic to make you able to investigate the crime scene while you are in this world instead of the other one."
"Oh, okay. Princess, do that NOW!"
"Okay." said Celestia, and she did the thing and then there was a magic TV screen that appeared that showed me the crime scene.
"Hm okay" I screamed. "From this picture I can gather the victim is dead."
"Wow, I see why they call you the greatest detective in the world" said Twilight not sarcasticaly.
"Wait a minute, zoom in on her head!" said me and the magic screen zoomed in. "What the god, theres a GUNSHOT WOUND!"
"But what could this mean?" said Twilight
"This means the victim was shot with the gun, which also means ONE THING!"
"Okay, what is it?" said Celelstsia
"You need figners to use guns, so they could only have died by someone who has FINGERS!"
Everyone gasped air into their throats
SOMEWHERE ELSE AT THE SAME TIME
There was a guy who was watching me through their own magic TV but I didn't know that at the time so shut up.
"Oh no" said the guy, "It appears this guy is unraveling my entire plan, I must do something before he kills me"
SOMEWHERE ELSE OTHER THAN THE LAST PLACE WHICH IS ACTUALLY JUST THE PLACE WHERE WE WERE BEFORE
"But who is there that has fingers?" I wondered to myself but then the throne room door opened!
"HALT YOURSELF!" said the pony. "I am Inspector Pony and you are under arrest, Detectibe Jakkid166."
"Oh okay." I said.
"Because," he said "You are the only one in this world with fingers!"
"Oh no" I said and I got arrested into jail.
"God damn it!" I said banging my door "I'm am innocent, I swear! I'll get Phoenix Wright to defend me in court."
Just then the purple pony walked in. "Hi, my name is Twilight Sparkle, and I think you are innocent."
"Okay, but how are you going to do that?" I asked.
"With this," said Twilight and she flashed her horn and I was in her house instead of in Celestia's prison house. "Now go find the real killer!" said Twilight.
"Okay, but first I'm tired," I said, so I tore all the pages out of her books and made a bed and sleept on that for the night.
TROLL IN THE NEW STORIES COLUMN!
...thought you might like to know.
*faints*
8687788
Yep... Eeyup.
I think we've had a bit too much of the ol' devil's humidifier, my lads...
Not since the New Testament have we beheld a more thought-provoking and culturally-significant piece of literature.
8687788
How long have you been waiting to do that one?
we should learn from this sacred text of learning and replace miles per hour with car per hour
8687788
https://youtu.be/XTVt7AqKfNw?t=473
AAAHHHH!
8688236
Once there was an almighty deity who created everything which exists. Then this story came along.
The deity's last words shortly after reading both chapters (and just before committing suicide) were "Bugger this for a game of soldiers." No one knows why.
8688276
Bugger this for a game of soldiers
8688276
This deity was Albert Einstein.
Oh boy another crappy self insert!
8688485
Has there ever been a good self insert? No really, I don't know.
Not sure if trolling or genuinely bad at writing...
8688653
Oh, he's taking the piss for sure.
8688996
Trolls of a feather troll together!
8688996 is not a troll! She writes great stories!
8689045
8689382
I am not double or triple but Hexeptuple hyped for this story, because you see my lads jakkid166 is not just some ace detective, he is also an ace author who is responsible for the world-renowned Phoenix Wright decology, a story that has been shared through various mediums, not just as a novel but as a video game and an online TV series. He is visiting this site from his home studio, fanfiction dot net, I would recommend reading the entirety of the original decology at the very least! IMO better than the shit by Shu Takumi, those games have pacing issues of being too long. Jakkid will be sure not to bore you and get straight to the action, thrill and excitement as soon as it becomes reasonable, not even the laws of reality will hold him back.
Therefore I give this a 9/10 the only way to improve upon it would be a surprise crossover with Hexepta Logic Hack and Acquittal Induction. Keep it up my man!
thanks for the grrrrreat reviews guys ill make sure to make the thrid chapter even BETTER
8689382
You know it!
...The worst part is that makes sense.
is... is this for real!?
...he's dead.
8688653
I think this is parodying poor quality fanfiction.
This is too real.
I'm just going to assume that all those in the comments section who've been gone for about a month have ascended to a higher plane of existence due to reading this.
10188151
And I'm just gonna assume you've gone there as well