Five hundred years ago Celestia defeated a strong foe. She had him imprisoned on an island to the west of Equestria where he would be no danger to anypony. Now he has escaped, and is headed straight for Canterlot.
Chapters (4)
- Member Since 1st Apr, 2015
- offline last seen May 17th, 2018
SolarCloak
This account is no longer active.
SolarCloak
Joined 1st Apr, 2015 ·
Offline
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Knight Breeze · 74k words · 727 34 · 11k views
- CORACK · 79k words · 187 10 · 5.7k views
- flamevulture17 · 136k words · 171 11 · 6.6k views
- Kit-San · 68k words · 87 6 · 4.1k views
- Znegil · 24k words · 192 30 · 6.2k views
- Summer Dust · 7.1k words · 383 9 · 6.8k views
- SpartanD014 · 108k words · 509 20 · 8.8k views
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Join our SubscribeStar to remove these adverts!
Stats
Page generated in 0.086 seconds
Total duration
913 users online
1,072,865 hits today, 1,960,719 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
I like the premise, plenty of potential here, but there are numerous grammatical errors, mainly the lack of a period at the end of a quote. "When using quotation marks, a period is neccary, unless you are quoting something inside another sentence." That would be an example.
"Blah blah blah."
"Sister? Why are you speaking like that?"
"Blah blah."
Another example.
Overall, just fix those errors, and the story looks good! I really like it!
7841391 Thank you very much for the feedback. Once I have the chance I'll get to editing the mistakes. I'm also glad you like the premise. I hope my future plans for the story continue to keep you enjoying the story.
Now I haven't actually read this story yet and it does sound interesting, but the synopsis makes it sound kind of... generic. It won't be like that, right? Don't worry, I'll still read it.
7843577 I understand what you mean. I did think it quite generic myself, but sometimes it's hard to come up with a non generic way to explain a storie's plot line. I hope to the story itself has some originality to it, and that you enjoy the read.
I am a confuse
Very interesting, I wonder what's really going on here?
Looking forward to the next chapter.
7845344 I'm glad you're enjoying the story so far. All shall be revealed soon.
Hey. Not a bad little story. A little short, definetly felt rushed. But not bad I liked the idea.
7848669 I'm glad you though it was good. I agree about the shortness, I'm still working on lengthening my stories. I mostly end up going off track and just waffling about unnessessary things. I'll definitely try and improve my story lengths in future. Thanks for the feedback!
It's good to see a change of pace once in awhile feels like a breathe of fresh air to see in my opinion a good hearted ending.
7848987 Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed the ending.