NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. WHEN YOU WRITE A HORROR STORY, YOU STICK TO THE HORROR ASPECT
and while we're here, I might as well point out NOT EVERYTHING HAS TO BE CUPCAKES INSPIRED. It's not all about torturing and killing ponies because of a dark history or FUCK ALL ELSE.
(Y'all should know, reading comments before the story is a good way to catch spoilers)
845135 Truth be told, I've never read Cupcakes. If there are similarities, I assure you they are accidental. Perhaps I didn't get it across in my writing, so it's my fault it isn't clear, but the point to the story was never about the violence, but rather the question of what might drive Applejack to do such a thing. She doesn't want to do what she did to Twilight, but she feels she has to in order to protect her brother.
And I do apologize for the ending. My Author's Note at the end of Chapter 1 did warn that the Epilogue would ruin the whole "horror" part.
Thank you for your input. While it is unlikely I'll write another story in this particular vein anytime soon, I will take any and all advice under consideration.
I like it with the epilogue, mostly because the story without paints Applejack as terminally stupid. Don't get me wrong, it's good horror in almost every way, but the whole time I'm reading it, I'm going, "Applejack, you idiot! Rainbow Dash knows that Twilight was in the orchard. When Celestia's student mysteriously disappears, the first thing that's going to happen is Sweet Apple Acres being turned totally upside down. Why didn't you just react with shock and then go move the skeleton after getting Twilight back to town? There's a whole Everfree Forest of creatures happy to gnaw on your pappy's bones!"
846710 This is true. Applejack is not acting rationally in this story. She has been known to make poor decisions under pressure in the past (the episodes Applebuck Season and The Last Roundup come to mind). I am considering writing a couple of alternate endings; one in which AJ does in fact get caught because she didn't quite think the whole "Princess's star student disappears" thing through, and another where she lets Twilight cast her memory spell.
But this story's gotten a pretty lukewarm reception, and it's hard to summon up the motivation to put any more work into it at this point. *shrugs*
I personally don't really like that kind of dark stories nor unhappy/sad endings, but I still think that fiction was well written, and the ending lightens things up as well as explains AJ's madness in the spooky story. The ratings seem to show this story is far from being bad, I believe. I think the idea of alternate endings such as Twilight managing to escape alive, or AJ changing her mind in time before doing what would turn her into a monster could be interesting... up to you and don't give up, no story can please everybody.
Extra space in-between speakers and:
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. WHEN YOU WRITE A HORROR STORY, YOU STICK TO THE HORROR ASPECT
and while we're here, I might as well point out NOT EVERYTHING HAS TO BE CUPCAKES INSPIRED. It's not all about torturing and killing ponies because of a dark history or FUCK ALL ELSE.
Know what? Next time you want to write a "horror" story, then check this first.
(Y'all should know, reading comments before the story is a good way to catch spoilers)
845135 Truth be told, I've never read Cupcakes. If there are similarities, I assure you they are accidental. Perhaps I didn't get it across in my writing, so it's my fault it isn't clear, but the point to the story was never about the violence, but rather the question of what might drive Applejack to do such a thing. She doesn't want to do what she did to Twilight, but she feels she has to in order to protect her brother.
And I do apologize for the ending. My Author's Note at the end of Chapter 1 did warn that the Epilogue would ruin the whole "horror" part.
Thank you for your input. While it is unlikely I'll write another story in this particular vein anytime soon, I will take any and all advice under consideration.
how the buck did you make this happy but not ruin the story
Big spoilers here.
I like it with the epilogue, mostly because the story without paints Applejack as terminally stupid. Don't get me wrong, it's good horror in almost every way, but the whole time I'm reading it, I'm going, "Applejack, you idiot! Rainbow Dash knows that Twilight was in the orchard. When Celestia's student mysteriously disappears, the first thing that's going to happen is Sweet Apple Acres being turned totally upside down. Why didn't you just react with shock and then go move the skeleton after getting Twilight back to town? There's a whole Everfree Forest of creatures happy to gnaw on your pappy's bones!"
And then there was an epilogue and I was happy.
846710
This is true. Applejack is not acting rationally in this story. She has been known to make poor decisions under pressure in the past (the episodes Applebuck Season and The Last Roundup come to mind). I am considering writing a couple of alternate endings; one in which AJ does in fact get caught because she didn't quite think the whole "Princess's star student disappears" thing through, and another where she lets Twilight cast her memory spell.
But this story's gotten a pretty lukewarm reception, and it's hard to summon up the motivation to put any more work into it at this point. *shrugs*
-Contains spoilers-
I personally don't really like that kind of dark stories nor unhappy/sad endings, but I still think that fiction was well written, and the ending lightens things up as well as explains AJ's madness in the spooky story. The ratings seem to show this story is far from being bad, I believe. I think the idea of alternate endings such as Twilight managing to escape alive, or AJ changing her mind in time before doing what would turn her into a monster could be interesting... up to you and don't give up, no story can please everybody.
I went on to read the Epilogue... And I really hope you make a horror story about Twilight going to visit Rarity for tea.
I went on to read the Epilogue... And I really hope you make a horror story about Twilight going to visit Rarity for tea.
what just happened?
Wait... Did twilight never actualy die, or is it just a story or what? Im confused...
899187 I'm pretty sure Pinkie's talking about the comedy "A TeaTime Visit" also by Esle. Pretty funny stuff.
You write the best horror fics and I like the optional happy endings!