So I woke up with a hangover...
So I woke up with a hangover...
A Wacky Wonderful Revolving Door TCB fic.
My first though upon waking up? Ow. Just. Bucking. Ow. My second one? I was pony. Just did a ponyism, dead give away. My third thought was a classic, age old question: what the buck happened last night?
I groan lightly, mentally/metaphorically grab my balls, and roll out of bed. The searing paing became an inferno as the much too bright room and floor hit me all at once. I gave a much more enthusiastic groan. "For Celestia's sake, turn off the light!" I moaned to the housekeeper AI.
"Right away m'am." the otherwise melodious mechanical voice chimed. Right now it felt like it had taken a jack hammer to my brain. Wait... M'am?! I checked, panicking. Yup, mare. I just ran out of Male-ifing potions last week, I wasnt expecting someone to try the old "Spike the kool aid with r63 potion" trick again so soon.
I was going to have to go to the market. Celestia damn it and Celestia damn these ponyisms. First things first... "Gimmie a potion, and hangover protocol."
"Any preference m'am?" The machine whispered at a barely audible level.
"Just... anything besides pony!" I ordered. A few agonizing moments later, there was a mechanical whirring as a small flask with a straw in it was delivered outside of my fort of tangled sheets. I poked my head back out and quickly sipped the three ounces. Mmm, beer flavored. I was rendered unconscious.
I woke up a few moments later, human. Still female however. They say that, long ago, there used to be conversion dreams, but ever since the made the human and gryphon potion they dont happen anymore. At least not often. I rose from my sheets on the ground, feeling rejuvenated. Potion, it cures what ails ya.
I walked over to the dresser, opening it. Inside was an impressive collection of clothes varying in color, fabric, and style as much as species. I chose some loose blue jeans and white t-shirt. Tightened the pants with a belt and then I was ready.
"Alright, hold down the fort, I'm going to the market." I called out to AI as I grabbed my keys and some money from the counter.
"Yes m'am." It affirmed as it readied the security measures, not that they were as used as they were in the old days, but better safe than sorry.
I exited my apartment and walked to the elevators, hitting the summon button. A few moments later a cheerful ding announced its arrival. I got in and puched the 'L' in. The elevator began its decent, stopping and opening at the lobby. I exited the elevator. "Hey Alex! Heh, or should I say Alexandra?" I turned to face the gryphon I call a friend. I use the word lightly.
"Did you do this Mike?" I accused. He had been the one to put the cherry potion in my drink last week.
"Hahahahahaaaa, no man this one wasnt me. Dig did it this time." Mike laughed.
"Dig? Seriously? The guy wont even drink a potion unless he's sick!" I was quite suprised, Dig was the kind guy who was so deep in his own world it was bound to intersect with earth like Equestira did.
"Yeah I know, surprising. We were just trying to get him out of his shell bro." Mike defended.
"Heh, it's alright, I just had a hell of a hangover this morning." Oh swearing, how I missed you. "Hey, so I'ma head to the market. I'll be back whenevs." I said my farewell and started towards the exit.
"Alright, see ya!" Mike waved good bye before heading towards the stairs.
I exited the apartment complex, it was once a conversion bureau. Way back when Equestria had first came to Earth, they made conversion bureaus where people could become ponies. They didnt even have any other potions, just pony. I think they did it because of the economy or something, I dunno. Maybe they were just really bored. I never payed much attention in history.
The sun shone delicately, creating temperate weather. A few low hanging clouds with pegasi one them, more pegasi playing tag in the air. A good number of gryphons flew about as well. On the street level, groups of diamond dogs, humans, ponies of all colors and races, dragons and a few other races walked the streets. There was even a chageling or two walking about sans disguise. All in All it was a normal day in Arizona.
I set off to the local market that carries a good selection of potion. They even occasionally had specialties, such as Alicorn or even a pony with a specific talent. The store in question was none other than the liqour and potion emporium. It was a bit bigger than the average liqour and potion store, but not the biggest in town.
The side walk was hot, but not too burning as I walked towards my goal. A comfortable burn nonetheless. I reached my goal and entered the emporium. The wonderful scent of various potion's aromas colliding filled the air. I headed past the liqours to the potion section. There it was, blue vial, male symbol on it. I grabbed three of them and eyed the selection. Today feels like a Gryphon day. I grabbed the appropriate vial and checked out.
"Already Alex? You just got three male-ifying vials a month ago!" The pony at the counter noted.
"Heh, you complaing about repeat buisness Golden?" I retorted.
"Well who was it this time?" Golden Bit asked, curious..
"Dig, if you can be believe it." I awnsered, the look on his muzzle was priceless.
"Ha! Now thats a good joke!" He chortled.
"Eh, thats just what I've been told." I shrugged.
"Anyways," He ringed me up and bagged the four potions, "That'll be ten seventy five." I handed him a ten and a five dollar bill, and he gave me my change.
"See ya later Alex!" Golden called.
I stepped outside, it was a beautiful day and it had only just begun.
-_-_-_-_-AUTHOR'S NOTES-_-_-_-_-
This was kinda an introductory story and something to help the fic get published and out there. Hopefully, the next one would be better.
Anyways, I hope you enjoyed it!
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Wacky Hijinks! I like it.
This story quite literally blows my entire headcanon for the CB universe out of the water, and yet I can't hate this.
Following, because I want to see what happens next.
This is shit. It has misanthropy and it wants to shove potion down my throat... and it doesn't have the things I like in it. Thumbs down and no spike mustaches.
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This is a very, very, very interesting premise. Can't wait to see where this heads. Keep up the good work, McWriter!
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833075 Please refer to previous image macro.
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Its the best.
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what is this i don't even
A comedic TCB fic?
You have my full and undevided attention.
BTW, I sincerely hope a "Cheerilie's Class" story is on the horizon, going by your intro...
Ok, now this is looking to be funny as hell. Now are humans the only ones that do this or do all the races do so? I wonder what Celestia thinks of her gift to humanity now.
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Bro. You dont understand. All I have uploaded here is comedy with the execption of the bed time stories. Yes, other races do this shit. I am going to explore this universe through one-shots. Yes cheerielees class will happen be eventually, next however, I plan a 'purist' one. Basically a guy that sticks to his birth race.
ok..... this is THE most unique TCB story I've read...... not even sure we can call it a TCB actually...... it looks much more like "Nanochange" but with nice grammar and standard potion system
and even though I gotta give the fic only 7.8/10 right now, I'm giving the comment section a 8.8/10
Oh, this IS good. The only thing better than not having to be human, is to get to be EVERYTHING. Shine on you crazy star!
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Mayhaps you would like to do some cover art for it?
Will there be a gryphon-ified Celestia?
My phone keeps eating these comments, so all I can say is that this is clearly going to be ridiculous, in the best way possible too.
This still needs more image macro.
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We already know your the alpha of the TCBverse Krass. Doing things like this just reinforces that stance.
There are not enough image macros in creation to properly say how awesome this story is, so I'll just track it and leave macros to the other people.
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More Macros?
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Well now. The fertilizer has OFFICIALLY HIT THE AIR CONDITIONING!
Let the chips fall where they may.
Okay, as a TCB fic goes..
This made me laugh my fucking head off. I don't have any image macros to share, so just have a laughing Rainbow Dash instead.
Wait wait wait! I call bullcrap, this is obviously ridiculous and completely unbelievable. People, let alone other species walking in Arizona?! Ok, that's just pushing it too far.