The Memoirs of Star Swirl the Bearded

by Mani-Roar

Excerpt: Not Too Savvy

Savvy Scoop had yet to produce a single story that was true to his namesake. In the year that passed since getting his dream job at the Canterlot Harold, the only news pieces he had to show for it were a mid section news column and the occasional sports page. His editor was by no means unhappy with his work. He turned in his copies on time, his sources were accurate, and the pay was decent enough; however he couldn't help but feel a sense of complacency with his lack of juicy stories.

That was until last week when his editor gave him the news of a lifetime. It was the kind of opportunity that had gotten Savvy interested in journalism to begin with. He was offered the exclusive privilege of writing and publishing the memoirs of Star Swirl the Bearded. Not just an interview, not just a think piece, but the full unbridled thoughts and experiences of literally the most interesting pony in all of Equestrian history, aside from Celestia, that is. It was basically a book deal with a guaranteed front page column every week until the full memoirs were to be published. Soon, every pony in Canterlot would know the name of this would be beat reporter.

“Forget Canterlot, all of Equestria will read this!”

Savvy spoke enthusiastically to an empty room. He had been sitting in the far east wing of the Canterlot library for a good 20 minutes or so. Star Swirl seemed to be running late. Savvy didn't mind too much. He wiggled his legs off of the cozy chair whilst staring intently at the empty one across from him. He checked his ink quills for the 17th time.

Perhaps I should have brought lunch he thought to himself. As tantalizing thoughts of of grilled paninis and eggplant masala filled his mind, a slight chilling breeze passed through his mane. He heard the weighted “clunk” sound of a solid metal gate close firmly behind him. He turned to look at the front door of the gallery he was seated in. About 30 meters away in the next room behind a hung curtain, the only exit that he knew of had been shut with no view of any pony in sight. Without the light from the hallway with the nearest window, the room became very dim. There were fresh candles available on the table but Savvy didn't see any materials nearby for lighting them. Since he was a pegasus pony, he didn’t have a magical means of igniting the seemingly useless candles.

“Um, hello? I’m still in here.” His voice echoed down the empty corridor. “If the library is closed, I can come back another time.” His trailing sentence was met with no response. Savvy allowed the silence to linger in the dead air for a few moments. Just as he was nearly able to distinguish the sound of his own beating heart, he noticed a figure on the opposite end of the room. As far as Savvy knew, there was no other entrance to this wing except the gate that had been mysteriously closed behind him.

The figure walked slowly and deliberately toward Savvy. He was going to call out to the barely seen pony, but held his tongue as he noticed the stranger’s distinguished features. It was a stallion of some age, which explained the slow walk. His mane was grey with spots of white and balding near the crown of his horn creating a significant widow's peak. In contrast to his dirty looking mane, he had a long and flowing beard that was white as the snow caps of the Canterlot mountains. His fur was a faded brown that could be mistaken for grey next to his elderly colored mane. His posture was slumped and his steps were weighted as if walking itself were a feat of its own. His eye sockets were sunk in slightly, casting a shadow and making him look perpetually tired. Savvy felt pity for the poor elder until he caught gaze of the old stallion’s eyes. They were as sharp and commanding as a knight of the royal guard, yet held an intelligence that could only be acquired through the experience of a pony with staunch expertise. It was as if the incredibly fragile frame of this ancient form somehow held the soul of a demigod.

The stallion’s horn flashed for no more than a millisecond and was echoed by the formally useless candles bursting into flames. Their glow gave a rich vibrance to a once dead wing, and let off a warmth that Savvy felt under his fur.

“Star Swirl the Bearded,” Savvy uttered with more breath than voice.

“Indeed,” the old stallion smiled as if a clever joke had been told. His demeanor reminded Savvy of an old friend or beloved relative. He could feel his shoulder muscles relaxing as he let out a somewhat long sigh of relief.

“I thought I was trapped in here for a second. They closed the door on me and…” Savvy pointed back to the door as Star Swirl spoke up to reassure the nervous reporter.

“I apologize for my tardiness and any theatrics you may have endured. I’m afraid, I am somewhat sensitive to light these days. “

As Star Swirl stepped into full view of the candle light, Savvy thought he saw something strange in the old colt’s eyes but it was only a natural hazel color that he was able to make out.

“I-it’s no problem at all. I haven't been waiting very long.” Savvy scrambled to get his ink and quills ready. He sloppily scattered them onto the table.

“Oh, I see. So you haven't been waiting here for 23 minutes?” Star Swirl raised his eyebrow.

“W-well, I suppose it has been that long. But it's not a big deal. I’m just happy to finally get to meet you.” Savvy held out his hoof toward Star Swirl who would have had to take a few steps forward to reach it for a proper hoof shake. He chose to remain where he was.

“Now, now my boy. That’s not the attitude to take.”

Savvy slowly lowered his ignored hoof.

“It’s not?”

Star Swirl labored himself into the seat across from Savvy.

“How many times have you tried to arrange this meeting with me?”

Savvy scratched the back of his head.

“Uh well, this would be the 3rd time.”

Star Swirl groaned as he tried to find a comfortable position for his back.

“So I’ve cancelled on you twice and made you wait the third time even though the deadline for your first article is three days from now. You’re allowed to be a little bit annoyed.”

Star Swirl smirked and tipped one eyebrow.

“True, that’s certainly true. But I realize how busy you must be and I certainly wouldn’t want to impose…”

Savvy swallowed what little saliva remained in his parched mouth. His eyes were glued to the calm and rustic legendary unicorn.

“Young colt, let me give you some advice. It doesn't matter who somepony is or what their status may be, never allow anypony to treat you as if you are unimportant or unworthy of their time. Otherwise, you will surely convince them and yourself that it's true.”

Savvy nodded at the old pony’s sage words.

“Ok, well in that case it’s a pleasure, Lord Star Swirl, to meet you in person finally.” Savvy punctuated with a sideways nod.

Star Swirl let out a deep and guttural chortle.

“Now that's more like it, my boy. Although I would be careful with the biting sarcasm. While certainly a useful way of getting your point across, it can be a double edged sword.”

Savvy’s laugh was shorter and less concerted than Star Swirl's. The old magician was certainly skilled at making others feel more at ease.

“Shall we begin?” Savvy suggested.

“I couldn’t agree more.”

A glowing orb levitated onto the table between Star Swirl and Savvy. Its translucent light flowed with a marble string of colors that cycled between shades of magenta and turquoise. Savvy’s eyes widened as he observed the mild spectacle. He wasn't accustomed to viewing magical artifacts.

“It’s an orb of truth.” Star Swirl answered Savvy’s unvoiced question.

“Which a bit of a hyperbole as far as nomenclature goes. Actually, hyperbole is a common trend for magical names I must say. What it actually does is record the sounds made in a 15 or so meter radius. Very efficient for record keeping. I’m hoping it can do something about the constant clutter of book keeping here at the castle.”

Savvy looked down at his own quills and notebook papers a bit disappointed. Star Swirl cleared his throat.

“Not that it could ever replace quill and ink entirely, that is. Feel free to take as many notes as you require, my good reporter.”

Savvy pulled his note book and quill up to his eye level with some enthusiasm.

“Alright, let's begin. I was wondering if I…”

“I suppose I'll start with a story. Yes, I think that this particular anecdote will set the tone nicely.”

“Actually Star Swirl, you see… don't get me wrong, an anecdote sounds great and all. I’m sure the readers will love it, but… you see, I was hoping I… well…”

Star Swirl nodded knowingly.

“Ah, I see that there is already a burning question inside of you. Well go ahead. Ask away.” Star Swirl leaned back in his chair.

Savvy felt a few drops of sweat on his back.

“Well that's the other thing. It's technically a taboo to even bring it up, and it may involve some personal feelings for you…”

Star Swirl held up his hoof and Savvy stopped speaking.

“If you want, it will be our little secret.”

The light from the orb turned off, leaving a dusky grey ball sitting on the table. Savvy took a deep breath.

“Are you or are you not Clover the Clever’s biological father?”

Star Swirl grinned, his relaxed posture unchanged.

“I see we have the hard hitting questions coming right out of the gate. Are you sure you’re not a more seasoned reporter than you give yourself credit for?”

Savvy shuffled in his seat.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I realize how rude and forward that question is, but my editor literally told me I would be fired if I didn’t get an answer to that question.” Savvy held up his hooves, his quill and papers almost forming a shield.

“Now, now no need to fret. I’m not even really sure why Princess Celestia put a choke order on that question being asked in public forums. It has a perfectly reasonable answer to it.”

Savvy leaned forward, his eyes glued to the old stallion’s face for any clue or give away in his expression.

“No, I am not the biological father of Clover the Clever. She calls me that out of familiarity and affection. And I admit, I do share the fatherly bond with her, as it were, but I’m afraid it has all to do sentiment and nothing to do with hereditary science or genetics.”

Savvy nodded as he scribbled furiously. He sighed as he finished up and looked back at Star Swirl, perhaps just a little disappointed.

“Now I apologize if that's not shocking and revealing answer your editor was looking for. But I assume your career is safe?”

Savvy nodded and smiled.

“Yeah, yes of course, Lord Star Swirl. They just said I had to get an answer not the answer.”

“Splendid. And please, none of this ‘Lord’ nonsense. I’ve been a Lord, a Duke, an ambassador, a professor, a doctor, and a ‘what-have-you’ in my time. At my age, I’m afraid I’m a bit weary of titles. Simply ‘Star Swirl’ will suffice.”

“If you say so Mr. Star Swirl, er… Star Swirl. Now about that anecdote you had?”

“Ah yes.” Star Swirl's expression lit up. “It’s funny you brought up Clover as I was going to tell you about the first time I met her.”

Savvy’s ears perked up. He had expected the anecdote to be more off topic, but this was exactly the sort of details he knew his readers and his editor were looking for.

“I had just moved to New Equestrian City, today known as Canterlot, shortly after the Hearths Warming foundation. Now the Platinum royal family had employed me to study and develop new types of magic and unicorn based conjuration. Obviously the state provided generously for me but there was a great deal of poverty in the early days of the city. I was warned to stay clear of beggars and vagabonds and street urchins and such... understand, it was a different time. This was before the days of the princesses. The first time I saw Clover, she was wrapped up in a tattered merchant stand cover trying to get some sleep at the corner of 5th and Marketview.”

Savvy jolted up from his notes.

“5th and Marketview? That's the richest side of town. That’s where the Canterlot opera house is.”

“Yes, as I said, it was a different time. My better judgment was telling me I should just keep walking, but I couldn't help but worry that she was sick from the cold and may be in danger. I called out to her and she woke with quite a fright. She looked up at me with fearful eyes as wide as the valleys of the Crystal Mountains. I spoke softly as I could, telling her there was nothing to be afraid of and that I wasn't going to hurt her.”

“And did that calm her down?”

“Calm her down?” Star Swirl scoffed. “She robbed me blind. She took one look at how fat the money purse was around my neck, ripped it off with her teeth, and ran down the alley faster than I could shout into the wind.”

“Wait, Clover the Clever was a thief?” Savvy could already feel the backlash from the scientific and magical communities at such a comment.

Star Swirl tilted his head.

“You make it sound like a bad thing. Everypony had to make a living somehow those days.”

Savvy laughed nervously.

“Jokes aside, you expect me to print that about Clover the Clever?”

Star Swirl scowled. Savvy marveled at how intimidating the old stallion could look when he wanted to.

“Oh I apologize. I was under the impression that you wanted my memoirs, not a safe and politically correct watered down version of the truth.”

Savvy scowled back as intently as he could muster.

“No, you’re right. I want nothing but the unfiltered truth, even if it ruffles a few feathers.”

Star Swirl returned to his familial grandfather smile.

“The next day I returned to the alley and found her nesting in the same spot as before. This time she awoke at the sound of my footsteps as I approached. Clearly not expecting to encounter the likes of me again, she took off without hesitation down the alley once more. Unbeknownst to her, I had scouted the alleyway shortly after our previous encounter. Having found a small hole in the wall, just big enough for a small filly to squeeze through, I blocked the escape route in anticipation of her scamper. Confused and afraid, backed into a corner left with nowhere to run, she dug in her back hooves ready to fight.”

“And did she attack?” Savvy’s tone was impertinent. Despite the old stallion’s calm demeanor in his storytelling, Savvy could scarcely stand even the slightest pause in Star Swirl's speech.

“No,” Star Swirl shook his head, “She waited. Every muscle in her frail being was tensed, waiting to fight for her very life. Her face was a mixture of hatred and fearful anticipation. It pained me that somepony so young should be forced to consider their own mortality at such a tender time in their life. ‘Do not worry, my child, everything is going to be alright,’ I told her but she didn't seem to understand or believe me. I asked her where she lived but she didn't seem much for conversation. Besides, the answer was obvious. I was standing in the only home she knew. She seemed somewhat less afraid although, never the less, as tense as before. When idle conversation seemed to fail, I decided to try something more practical. I asked her if she would like something hot to eat and a soft bed by a fireplace that evening.”

Savvy looked up from his notes.

“But she didn't trust you yet, did she? She was expecting some kind of caveat or revenge for stealing from you.”

Star Swirl closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“Trust is the rarest and most valuable commodity in all of Equestria, in all of the world I’m sure. Sometimes when there is none to be had, it must be borrowed.

Star Swirl looked directly at Savvy Scoop.

“Take care that you always return borrowed trust.”

Savvy nodded softly.

“At last she acquiesced and joined me back at my home in New Equestrian City. After all, the promise of food is a difficult temptation to turn down, especially when one is constantly hungry. I had never seen a pony eat so quickly and greedily in my life. She gorged herself as if the food might disappear from the table. Although I supposed it did disappear directly into her belly. Even when she was clearly in pain from eating so much, she asked for more. I assured her, there would be another feast in the morning. She slept as soundly as a stone and looked peaceful as an angel laying next to the fireplace. I’ll never forget that first night she was home. I shudder to think how many cold and lonely nights she spent on those streets, but it didn't matter anymore. She would never have to worry about her next meal ever again. She was so smart, so inquisitive. She learned fast and was always so eager. I hardly know where to begin describing the process of teaching her science and magic. In retrospect, it seems more like a joy than anything else. I wouldn't trade anything in the world for those days.”

Savvy shifted in his seat. He appreciated the old colt’s sentiment, but his duty to his work pressed him to inquire into uncomfortable waters.

“Star Swirl, how did Clover the Clever die?”

Star Swirl looked as if he was woken from a dream.

“Ah,” He smiled and stroked his snowy white beard.

“I think that will be all for today.”

Savvy looked disappointed.

“If you insist. I should have enough to at least write a teaser article.”

“Thank you, Savvy scoop, for coming all this way. I look forward to our next meeting. Now if you’ll excuse me.”

Star Swirl got up slowly from his seat and made his way back toward the dark corridor.

“Wait, aren’t you going to turn off the orb and take it with you?”

Savvy pointed to the luminescent sphere on the table.

“I think it’s best if it remains here. Furthermore, I don't have the ability to turn it on or off. You’ll forgive my... intrusion, but I set its enchantment to activate and deactivate when you enter or leave the room. That way, it only functions at your presence.”

Savvy looked bewildered at the orb.

“Wait, but what about earlier when you turned it off when I asked about…” Savvy’s eyes went wide with realization.

“Oh you mean my little light show?” Star Swirl horn flickered and the orb rested grey and dull once more. A moment later, the vibrant colors flashed back to life.

“Appearances are often deceitful, my young colt.”

The young colt felt a rush of anger down his back.

“But how could you lie to me? I would never…”

“You would have never asked the most important question.” Star Swirl interrupted. “But now you have. And now you have your article. Your legacy will echo in the hallways for generations to come.”

Before Savvy could respond, Star Swirl vanished in a burst of blinding white light. It took a moment for Savvy to see clearly in the dark room again. When his eyes adjusted he noticed that the candles were extinguished and the orb lay still and grey on the table.

“Great Celestia, what a cheeky, stubborn son of a bitch!”

Savvy took a long hard look at the orb again.

“Ah crap…”

Author's Note:

Did somepony say Star Swirl the Bearded?

I've been wanting to tell this story for a long time. It's gone through several formats and iterations but I've finally got a version I'm happy with.

What secrets do you think exist in Star Swirl's past? Let me know in the comments sugarcube