The Truth About Cutie Marks

by Magic Step

Chapter 4

“Blueblood?” the alicorn called, entering Blueblood’s room in the palace.

Blueblood looked up. “Mom! You came!” He hugged Celestia tightly, crying.

“No business of mine could ever be more important that making sure you are okay,” Princess Celestia said, smiling. “Stop hugging me before you burn to death.”

Hugging Celestia was like hugging an oven. Celestia said that she burned with the energy of the sun even as she walked among mortal ponies. So there was a perfectly logical explanation for why she never showed Blueblood the normal physical signs of affection that mothers usually showed their children.

“So, are you okay?” Celestia asked, shoving Blueblood away from her.

Blueblood let go sadly. “No, Mom. I’m not okay.”

“The doctors told me you would have to be careful with your legs for a while so as not to ruin the bandages, but you should be ready to go back to your job tomorrow morning, as there is not much physical work involved.”

“But I can’t go back to my job,” Blueblood said. “Mom, you can’t see because of the bandages, but, but, my c-cutie mark is gone. Gone. Erased. I’m j-just a blank flank.” He tried not to cry. Celestia usually got upset when he cried.

Celestia waved a wing dismissively. “I’m sure you can perform your job admirably, the same way you always have, until we can reapply your cutie mark.”

“No I can’t!” Blueblood said. “I can’t do paperwork properly without it. My judgment will be impaired, my knowledge incomplete, my understanding hampered. Mom, you know what ponies without cutie marks are like. I have no talent anymore. I can’t do anything properly.”

“My prince-to-be,” Celestia said, smiling at Blueblood, “you don’t really mean to say that somehow you think your mind is affected by your flank?”

“Of course it is, Mom. That’s what you always tell everypony!”

“But I’m sure you can manage for a few days without-”

“No! I need my cutie mark now!”

“You can’t. Not until you’ve healed. Nopony will notice it isn’t there under all the bandages.”

“But I’ll know it isn’t there.”

“Just deal with your lack of a picture on your butt for a few days. How horrible could it possibly be?”

“I can’t do my job without my cutie mark. It gives me ability. It makes me me. Celestia, please, I need my mark back, please!”

Blueblood saw the warning signs. Celestia was about to snap at him. He’d seen this often enough to know how it would go.

“Oh, will you stop whining already, you pathetic little brat? I mean, do you have any idea how much work I and my agents have to do, day and night, to keep the population ignorant and unquestioning? But you- you eagerly devoured every bit of propaganda that I spoon-fed you, and loved it. I may wish most ponies were like you, but you- you make me sick. For the love of me, grow a spine!”

Blueblood blinked. “Wh-what are you saying?”

“You dense, thick-skulled moron!”

“I-I don’t understand. Propaganda?”

“Cutie marks don’t do anything!”

“…What?” said Blueblood softly.

Princess Celestia took a few deep breathes to gain control of her emotions.

“Cutie marks don’t do anything?” Blueblood repeated.

Princess Celestia flicked her wing dismissively. “Oh, hay no. I just use them to make sure the working class ponies are content to stay working class ponies for the rest of their lives. It works perfectly: the ponies who work for nothing on a farm that supplies me never try to rise above their station because they’re all afraid of Cutie Mark Failure Insanity Syndrome, which, by the way, is just as fake as cutie marks.” She gave Blueblood a disparaging look. “At least, I thought I’d made it up… until today.” She sighed.

“Cutie marks… don’t… do… anything?” Blueblood repeated.

“The method has other benefits too,” said Princess Celestia. “Nopony would think of electing anypony without a leadership cutie mark to office, and who gives out the leadership cutie marks? I do. Democracy at its finest- when it serves its superior’s purposes! Ha!”

“Cutie marks… don’t… do… anything?” Blueblood repeated, his voice becoming impossibly soft.

Princess Celestia, in fact, didn’t even know he was talking, and continued over him: “Society has been nicely conditioned to accept that you must never listen to anypony with a screw for a cutie mark, as anything that comes out of their mouth is sheer nonsense- which allows me to get rid of my opponents easily. And those silly fools in Hoofington thought they could rebel against me- as if!”

Blueblood looked up at his mother. He had heard her use this tone of course, usually when discussing her subjects (“As foolish as sheep!” she would say, continually).

Celestia had frequently played pranks on Blueblood, his whole life long, where she did her utmost to convince Blueblood that a lie was truth. Then one day she would laugh at him for believing her, point out all the things that he could have noticed to prove the whole thing unreal, and then either congratulate herself for being a good liar or berate Blueblood for being thickheaded, depending on her mood. Once she had convinced Blueblood that he wasn’t the heir to the throne, and actually his childhood enemy Shining Armor was. Another time she told him he was adopted. Yet another time she had informed him that the great parasprite menace was threatening Equestria and would only leave if she gave them her beloved firstborn foal, so for the good of the kingdom he was expected to sacrifice himself with a smile. She had gone disturbingly far with that one; after a week of recommending he do various fun things ‘while he still could’ she had bundled him into a ceremonial box for delivery to the parasprites… and then, after several minutes, had opened the box and laughed at him. She and Cadence had enjoyed themselves immensely, and had laughed so hard they’d started crying. Blueblood had been crying too… for other reasons. Fortunately, Celestia had been in too much of a good mood to criticize him for that.

He’d always been upset whenever he learned Celestia had been playing a prank on him, but now he prayed this was a prank. He looked at Celestia’s eyes and tried to tell if she was lying. She wasn’t laughing yet, but that meant nothing. She could keep an incredibly straight face when she wanted to. Asking her if this was a prank would reveal nothing at all if she answered no.

“Mom?” he said. “Why are you telling me this now?”

“One gets a little tired of nopony ever realizing one’s absolute genius,” Celestia said, shrugging. “That, and… it’s important for you to know this. I’ve had you busy with cutie mark assignments forever, and you are now familiar with the system. You need to know all this if you are to become… not the permanent prince, to be sure, since I have no intention of ever needing a replacement, and you, being mortal, will inevitably die long before I do, but even a princess needs a vacation… and you would be in the perfect position to rule Equestria while I take a break. But in order for that to happen, you need to know the truth about cutie marks. You need to understand their power.”

“Cutie marks do nothing,” Blueblood said, stunned.

This couldn’t be a prank. No matter what lie Princess Celestia had told him, it had never been a lie that benefitted him. Ever. Celestia had said that she didn’t want the thought of having raised Blueblood’s hopes and then dashed them on her conscious. She’d always felt it was more honorable to be able to give him good news at the end of the day.

“What have I been doing all day? What have I been doing all my life?”

“Giving ponies purpose. Guiding them in their life. Allowing them to find fulfillment even when they are destined to do nothing of much significance. There will always be ponies who must do menial labor, to make the kingdom run. Your job is to make ponies happy. You make everypony happy. How is that living a meaningless life?”

Blueblood took a deep breath. “I… understand. Th-thank you… Celestia.”

Princess Celestia smiled. “I’m very glad we talked about this now. I understand it must come as a shock, so, if you want to take a few days off of work to recover…”

Blueblood sat up as though he’d been electrocuted. “No! No! I mean, no. No. I don’t want that. I really don’t want that. I need to work. Please.”

Celestia stared at him for a moment, then shook her head, smiling. “You are a silly pony, Blueblood.”

***

“What do you want with a leadership test?” Twilight asked Apple Bloom incredulously.

“Ah just wanted to look at it. See if Ah might stand a chance of qualifying.”

Twilight shook her head. “You can’t just ‘look at’ a leadership test. Leadership tests have to be conducted in pony. Those are done at the Cutie Mark Bureau, and I doubt you would want to travel all the way there.”

“Yeah,” Apple Bloom said, thinking about how she’d never been out of Ponyville, and the stash of food and the train ticket she’d saved for a special occasion. “Yeah, like Ah’d do something like that.”

***

“How dare you tell me that Peabody will never be important?”

“I need a new cutie mark. I can’t take it anymore.”

“You tyrant!”

“Every councilpony in Hoofington suddenly had a screw for a cutie mark.”

“I can’t live.”

“Do you love your mother?”

“You’re making ponies happy. Isn’t that what you want, Blueblood?”

Blueblood woke up in a cold sweat. He hadn’t realized he’d managed to fall asleep. He felt more tired than he had last night.

Well, it was morning, and time to go back to work. Everything would be just like normal.

He rolled out of bed, wincing as he applied weight to his hind legs. They still ached like crazy, but that was normal after healing magic had been done. His breakfast had been delivered to his room- eggs, waffles, and his medicine. In addition to being essentially an alicorn born without a couple of limbs- namely his wings- Blueblood had also been born with a rare magic condition that made his magic powers prone to become self-destructive if he wasn’t constantly on medication. Twice he had forgotten to take his medicine. Celestia had been very unhappy with him… but for once, her opinion of him had been irrelevant to Blueblood. He’d been in too much pain to care. At first everything had been normal, and then he suddenly got hot, and then it started. All his magic turned on him at once. It had felt like his flesh was boiling, warping, twisting, like he was exploding, like he was being roasted alive. All he’d been able to do was lie on the floor, screaming and crying, until Celestia had rushed over to him and used her magic to save him.

But it hadn’t happened in vain. For a week after each of the incidents, Celestia had given him as close to her undivided attention as Blueblood had ever had, and all of it was gentle, comforting, and warm, without criticism or lies or any harsh words from her. All she had cared about was making sure that he was okay. If Blueblood ever doubted his mother’s love for him, all he had to do was remember those days.

The medicine was a thick black substance, like chocolate syrup, except it tasted more like licorice than chocolate. Not an unpleasant taste at any rate, though Blueblood always washed his medicine down with plenty of milk to make sure the sticky liquid was cleared out of his mouth, and it made him feel groggy afterwards.

Breakfast taken care of, Blueblood escaped out the window and headed to his office. He didn’t feel like seeing anypony today. He didn’t want to talk with anypony.

As he walked to his office, gloom settled around him. He couldn’t let the shocking truth he learned yesterday affect his performance. Celestia would be furious.

He was making ponies happy, he reminded himself. That was all that mattered.

As he entered the building, the first thing he saw was the Cutie Mark Application Machine, as of late been retooled into a Cutie Mark Removal Machine and now being repaired by a group of busy ponies with clockwork cutie marks. Well, Blueblood thought, there were now two ponies with clockwork cutie marks he would never have to worry about again. Flim and Flam had both been captured by the guard and were waiting for the CMAM to be repaired so they could receive their new bloody knife cutie marks.

Thinking of bloody knife cutie marks reminded him of the shy red pegasus who had visited him the other day. He certainly hadn’t seemed very happy.

He shook his head. He could endure. He just had to keep himself from blurting out the truth, and he would be fine.

***

Apple Bloom couldn’t close her mouth for the life of her.

The buildings were so huge… and majestic… and rich… and different.

Apple Bloom walked slowly through the streets of Canterlot, marveling at everything. She was sure she looked like a country hick, but oh well, she was a country hick, and her mouth just wouldn’t stay shut.

It took her a long time to notice that the buildings she was now wandering among were actually the back alleys of Canterlot. Even the alleyways looked nice. But it was time to face reality: she was lost.

She ran up to the first pony she saw, a red pegasus shuffling around in a pile of garbage.

“’Scuse me, mister,” she said, “can you tell me how to get to the Cutie Mark Bureau?”

The red pegasus looked at her and blinked, then hastily shifted his gaze to the ground in front of him. “You… who are… what are you doing here?”

“Can you answer the question or not?”Apple Bloom said, impatient.

“We-ell,” the pegasus said, drawing out the word, “I… could take you there, but, um, are you sure you want me to?”

“Course!” Apple Bloom said. “Why would Ah be asking you if Ah didn’t want you to take me? Lead the way to destiny!” She struck a dramatic pose, pointing down the street.

“Well, I guess… I-I mean, if you’re sure that’s okay,” the red pegasus whispered.

He lead her to a more main street.

“Where are all the ponies?” Apple Bloom asked.

“Hiding,” the red pegasus whispered.

Apple Bloom turned in time to catch a pink earth pony yanking her filly indoors and shutting the door. “Hiding from what?”

The red pegasus just sighed. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

Suddenly another pegasus picked Apple Bloom up and carried her into the air.

“Hey! Help! Ah’m being foalnapped!” Apple Bloom shrieked.

The pegasus set her on the roof of a nearby building. “Calm down, ma’am. We know. We have the situation under control.”

Apple Bloom gaped at her captor, who turned out to be a member of the royal guard. “Huh?”

“It’s Celestia’s policy of allowing murderers to roam free because supposedly their cutie mark warns other ponies of their intentions beforehoof. It just creates more work for the guard,” he sighed.

“Hey, you!” A female voice shouted below.

Apple Bloom peered over the edge of the roof and saw a gray earth pony with a bright golden mane and sunglasses approach the red pegasus. She looked oddly familiar.

“I don’t appreciate you and those who share your Mark running amok throughout my town,” the gray mare said in an oddly familiar voice, “but I was willing to tolerate your presence, for the sake of my princess, as long as you laid low. But clearly you can’t restrain yourself, can you? Do we have to resort to more drastic punishments?”

The red pegasus’ reply was unintelligible from Apple Bloom’s position.

“What are you saying?” The gray mare snapped. “Do you dare doubt our justice system? We were more than generous with you, and now you are abusing our kindness to you, you parasprite.”

Apple Bloom gasped at such naughty language. Foals who called other foals parasprites were suspended from school for a week in Ponyville, though Apple Bloom suspected that was partially motivated by their teacher's desire to cut down class sizes to make her job easier.

“Hey!” she screamed. “He wasn’t foalnapping me! Ah asked him to take me somewhere because Ah’m new in town!”

The gray mare looked up. “Don’t try to defend this ruffian. He deserves what he will get.”

“No!” Apple Bloom leapt off the roof.

In retrospect, she thought as she spun towards the ground headfirst, this was not one of her better ideas.

The red pegasus quickly launched into the air and caught her gently, using just the right speed to first slow then stop her descent.

Apple Bloom took a moment to recover from shock, then shouted, “See! This here pony is one of the good guys! Your soldier didn’t even do anything to save me!”

The guard pony tried to look invisible.

“Put that filly down now,” the gray mare shouted.

“Yes ma’am, yes ma’am,” the pegasus stammered, setting Apple Bloom on the ground. “G-go home, little filly.”

“Ah’m not going home,” Apple Bloom insisted. “Ah’m going to the Cutie Mark Bureau, and you are gonna guide me there, no matter what that gray mare…” Apple Bloom got her first close up look at the gray earth pony, and saw that her cutie mark was a magnifying glass. “Ruby?”she asked.

The gray mare took off her sunglasses. “Yes?”

Apple Bloom stammered, “Y-you’re dead!”

Ruby looked confused, then shook her head and put her shades back on. “I think you must be thinking of somepony else.” She waved her hoof. “All right, kid, it’s your funeral if you want to trust this creep, but don’t worry. We’ll be watching.” She strode away regally.

Apple Bloom watched her go, marveling at how powerful she looked without needing a crown or a fancy outfit. She wondered if she could walk like that.

She turned back to the red pegasus. “So, mister, what’s your name anyways? You just saved my life, so Ah figure Ah oughta know.”

The red pegasus’ eyes darted around. “Well, most ponies call me Shifty Gaze.”

“No shocker, I guess,” Apple Bloom said, trying to follow where the pegasus was looking. The effort nearly made her cross-eyed. “But what should Ah call you?”

“Well,” the pegasus said, smiling slightly, “I guess… I guess, if you want, you could call me… Autumnshy.”

“Autumnshy, huh? Okay. My name’s Apple Bloom.” She shook his hoof.

“Have you, um… have you even noticed my cutie mark yet?” he asked as they started walking again.

“Huh what?” Apple Bloom checked his flank. “Oh, huh. Bloody knife. Ah just saw a knife and assumed you made salads or something, pretty silly huh? Okay, off to get my cutie mark. Don’t feel offended if Ah don’t want to pick yours, huh? Ah mean, why do you pick cutie marks like that? Applejack says it just makes the ponies who have them feel miserable.”

“We don’t choose them,” Autumnshy whispered.

Apple Bloom didn’t really hear him and kept on talking. “Applejack used to give food to this one pony with a cutie mark like that. She said we can’t ever hope for these ponies to change if we never show them love. But the other ponies put a stop to that, ‘specially Fluttershy, who said that it was endangering all the animals as well as the ponies to let murderers feel welcome at our town. Who’da thought that little pegasus had it in her to be so outraged?”

“You know Fluttershy?” Autumnshy asked. “How- how is she?”

“Hmm? Oh, well, okay Ah guess. Has a house full of animals, so she’s pretty happy.”

Autumnshy smiled. “Well, she would be.”

“Oh, speaking of which, you hungry?” Apple Bloom stopped and pulled a roll out of her lunch sack. “Here.”

Autumnshy stared at the roll in disbelief for a few seconds. Then the roll disappeared so fast it was like Autumnshy had inhaled it.

“Woah!” Apple Bloom said. “And Applejack says Ah eat fast. Well, all the better; Ah want to get to the beaurau fast.” She scampered down the street.

“Um, it’s that way,” Autumnshy muttered, pointing down a side street.

***

Blueblood had been staring at the same form for ten minutes and he still hadn’t filled in a single blank.

This had never happened to him before. Usually he threw himself into paperwork with a passion. It was the thing he enjoyed more than anything, although Celestia didn’t seem to understand that. It was… it was…

…his talent.

Celestia had been right. She’d spoon-fed him cutie mark propaganda, and he’d joyfully swallowed the poisonous ideas and begged for more. But the sudden truth that had been forced down his throat, to continue the metaphor, was reacting badly for somepony who’d lived on a constant diet of lies, and now he literally felt ill. He had no idea how he’d keep anypony from noticing. The only reason his secretary hadn’t noticed was because she wasn’t in the office yet; she had a personal vendetta against arriving for work any earlier than 9 o’clock and leaving any later than 5 o’clock, and Celestia was tired of trying to replace Blueblood’s secretaries and never reproached her for this.

Somepony knocked at the door. Blueblood braced himself. Try and act normal, he thought. What was normal? How could he tell if he was being normal?

“Hello?” He said softly, with the vague hope that they might think he wasn’t in his office.

Then he realized that he could very well have pretended he wasn’t in his office and gotten away with it. The beaurau wasn’t supposed to open until 9. He felt like banging his head on his desk.

The door burst open and a little yellow filly bounced into the room, her pink bow flapping with each bounce. “Hay, there, mister, where do Ah go to get a leadership cutie mark?”

Her Southern accent reminded Blueblood of Twinkleshine. Of course. Why hadn’t he thought of Twinkleshine before? She would know what to do.

Could he tell Twinkleshine the truth? Or would she just think he was making it up?

The little filly waved a hoof in front of his face. “Hey, mister! You asleep or something? Ah need to know what Ah need to know to get a leadership cutie mark!”

“S-sorry,” Prince Blueblood said, pulling the appropriate form out of a drawer. “Er, I’ll need your parent or guardian’s permission before I can let you take the test.”

“My parents are both dead,” the filly said matter-of-factly, as if she was explaining she wasn’t a griffon.

“Well, then, uh, who is your legal guardian?” Blueblood said, a bit unnerved by her casual tone.

“Oh, dang it… uh, hold on a second!” the filly ran out of the room.

A moment later she came back, shoving a reluctant red pegasus into the room. “Will he do?” she asked.

The pegasus instantly stared at the floor and backed off. “I-I’m sorry, she dragged me here, please don’t call the guards, please, I’ll just leave you alone now…”

“If you don’t act as my legal guardian, Ah won’t give you anymore food!” the filly shouted at him.

That made the pegasus hesitate for a moment. “You… were going to give me more food?” he asked.

“Not anymore,” the filly said.

The pegasus looked up at Blueblood briefly. “I-I can’t,” he sighed.

“No, wait, don’t leave,” said Blueblood.

The pegasus stared at Blueblood in surprise, before realizing what he was doing and shifting his gaze to a picture on the wall instead.

Blueblood hadn’t realized he was about to say that. The words had just spilled out.

“I-I mean,” he said, “um, are you this filly’s legal guardian? Because, you could, you know, sign this form for her if you are. I mean, um, there’s nothing that prevents you from signing just because you are a convicted felon.” Blueblood felt stupid. He sounded like… well, the red pegasus.

The pegasus continually looked from Blueblood to the floor. Then he whispered, “What has happened?”

Blueblood wanted to kick himself. So much for acting like everything is normal. But the universe would decide to send the red pegasus in as his first test for normalcy. The way he saw it, what was normal for him was to… make this pegasus’ life even more miserable. It had been one thing to treat the red pegasus like a threat when Blueblood had thought he was a murderer, but now that he knew that the knife cutie mark meant nothing… now it felt wrong. No, now it was wrong.

But he didn’t say anything. He couldn’t say anything.

Nopony spoke.

“Hey,” the little filly said. “Ah don’t have all day here. Ah need to get my new cutie mark, okay?”

“Um, well, I’m not actually Apple Bloom’s legal guardian. Actually, I just met her today, so I guess I have no point being here. Um, should I leave?” He stepped back, and then forward.

“Well, um…” Blueblood hesitated. “Listen, uh, mister…”

“Autumnshy,” Apple Bloom filled in. The red pegasus shot her an annoyed look before he shifted his gaze to another area of the room.

“Mister Autumnshy, I just wanted to say… I’m sorry for overreacting yesterday. That was uncalled for, especially since you aren’t a murderer. Um, that’s all I wanted to say. Now, you can leave if you want… I guess…”

Autumnshy closed his eyes.

“Something wrong?” Apple Bloom asked.

“N-nothing,” Autumnshy said. “H-how… Why are you…”

He took a deep breath. “I just can’t get over this, I mean, so many ponies, they just look at me and run, or call the guards, and you- you understand cutie marks better than anypony else, and… and… I can’t believe you believe me. I just… thank you.” He took Blueblood’s front hoof in both of his. “I can’t believe, knowing what you know, that you’d do this just to make me happy.”

“Y-yeah,” Blueblood said. “No, no. No! I’m not nice, okay, and I don’t want you to be happy. No, I do. I mean- stop thanking me. Please, I can’t help it. I just… can’t… take it!”

Blueblood slammed his head on his desk.

“Hey, am Ah gonna get a leadership cutie mark or not?” Apple Bloom demanded.

“Are you okay?” Autumnshy asked, rubbing his hoof on Blueblood’s head.

“Cutie marks are fake,” Blueblood mumbled.

“What?” said Autumnshy.

“Cutie marks are fake!” Blueblood shouted, throwing his head up and flinging Autumnshy’s hoof into his face.

“Ow,” Autumnshy whispered.

“Oh, gosh,” Apple Bloom said, gaping at Autumnshy. “Even your cries of pain are cute-sounding. Are murderers supposed to be so feminine?”

“Cutie marks are fake,” Blueblood repeated, in a daze. How the hay was he so incompetent that he just spat out the truth as soon as somepony was around to spit it out to? Celestia was right about him.

“What did you say?” Autumnshy asked.

“Cutie marks are fake.”

“Huh?” said Apple Bloom. “What, we’ve got counterfeiters on the loose again?”

“No,” Blueblood said. “All cutie marks are fake. Useless. They don’t mean anything. They don’t affect our minds or our bodies or anything. They’re just a picture.”

There was a long pause.

“What?” Autumnshy whispered.

“Ah’ve been lied to! This ain’t funny! Ah want to complain!” Apple Bloom announced.

Blueblood rested his head in his hooves. “How do you think I feel? My job is to give people these stupid pictures and make sure they’re happy with them. I see ponies all day… ponies who think these pictures are important… and I’ve been telling them what they believed…”

Tears formed in Blueblood’s eyes. Dang it, he thought. Celestia must hate me now.

Autumnshy hugged Blueblood.

Blueblood gave a little start.

“Shh,” Autumnshy whispered. “It’ll be okay, you’ve just had a hard day. Just calm down…”

After a while, Blueblood wiped his tears away.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Autumnshy asked.

Blueblood sighed. “Sure.”

***

“Sheesh, and everypony always says Celestia is the good princess,” Apple Bloom said. “Makes me wonder what happened with her so called ‘evil sister’ Nightmare Moon a while back…”

“I don’t know,” Blueblood said. “I really don’t know anything anymore…”

“So… what are you going to do now?” Autumnshy whispered.

Blueblood sighed again. “Oh, I don’t know. Try to act like everything is normal, I guess…”

“Like hay that’s gonna work,” Apple Bloom said. “Not when you blurted out everything to the first ponies you saw.”

“I know that,” Blueblood said. “But what am I supposed to do? I can’t change the system.”

Apple Bloom brightened. “Why the hay not?”

“Huh?” said both stallions at the same time.

“Ah know what we’re gonna do!” Apple Bloom shouted.

“We?” said Autumnshy.

“We’re gonna overthrow the alicorn sisters and start our own kingdom!”

Nopony spoke for a moment. Then Blueblood laughed nervously.

“That’s very… cute of you, young filly. I dare say you can do that.”

“No you don’t. You’re just saying that because you think fillies’ shouldn’t have their self-esteem damaged. But Ah don’t care; Ah’m gonna do it anyway. Come on, let’s get moving!”

She trotted out the door, then came back after a moment.

“Why the hay aren’t you following?” she asked. “We can’t overthrow the alicorn sisters from this teeny weaponless office! Come on, we gotta get reinforcements!”

“From where?” Blueblood asked. “You can’t just walk through the street, announce your intention to overthrow Princess Celestia, and expect anything to happen other than getting arrested!”

“Well, can you guys think of anypony who would help? Doesn’t Shifty Gaze know anypony?”

Autumnshy looked around the room for a moment.

“I thought you had a bunch of partners to help you with your various heists,” Blueblood said.

“Hey. Hey, you’re right. I do know someponies who’d help.” Autumnshy smiled.

Blueblood stood up. “Come to think of it, there’s somepony I’d at least like to talk to…”

“See?” Apple Bloom said. “Once we add your friends to my reinforcements, we’ll be ready in no time!”

“What reinforcements?” Blueblood asked. “You can’t possibly know a group of ponies who’d be ready and willing to join something like this on short notice.”

“Ah know someponies who don’t like cutie marks and are pretty good fighters,” Apple Bloom said, a malicious grin on her face. “Ah’ve got a village full of ‘em.”