I sat on the front porch of our home, drinking my coffee. We were in a slightly more rural area, living in an a neighborhood in which the houses were several meters apart each. There were also numerous trees around, giving off the illusion that we were in the woods. I remembered when I would imagine I was a beautiful princess. I looked at the chrome wind chime, seeing my temporarily female face. I didn't have to pretend now. I most certainly was beautiful, and I was definitely Flare's princess. It felt amazing to relive my foalhood fantasy as something real.
I closed my eyes and began to relax. Breathing in, I felt the cool air enter my lungs, giving me a cool, soothing sensation that brought down the temperature of my warm lungs. I was loving every single minute of being physically female and hoped that Flare could make it permanent after the few days I was given. I heard a fluttering noise and a slight gust of what felt like wind. Opening my eyes revealed a bright red cardinal, standing on the railing of the porch, looking directly at me. I remembered a time when I envied their beauty, but no more. We were now both beautiful.
I held out my hoof and he fluttered his way to it, making his way to my shoulder as I put my hoof back down. The cardinal was staying on my shoulder, as if he was mine now. I didn't realize that I was making a new friend. I walked inside, the cardinal still standing on me. Once I entered the door, it flew to the dining room table, once again looking at me. It chirped and looked at me expectantly.
"You need a name... I'll call you Red. That's what I can think of at the moment at least." I said.
The bird chirped in approval. I had indeed made a friend, a good one at that. I knew that many unicorns had bird assistants. Most of the ones I knew of were owners of owls. Twilight Sparkle, who later became an alicorn had two assistants, one bard owl and one baby dragon. I read about Starswirl the Bearded's screech owl in school. I had never heard of a songbird being a unicorn's assistant. Then again, I had also never looked much into magic. I knew how to levitate things, but I didn't really know much more than that. Still, I couldn't wait for Flare to come home and see Red.
I felt my phone vibrate, so I pulled it out to see that my father was calling me. My eyes widened as I considered answering it. I felt a tear stream from my eye. I had no idea what he was going to say. I put my hoof on the red icon, sliding it across the screen, hanging the call up before it had started. I set my phone down on the counter as I walked to the bedroom. I curled up into a ball as I cried on the corner of the bed. Red arrived in the room, landing on my nightstand and nuzzling me, attempting to cheer me up.
I looked up at red, his eyes were very obviously full of sympathy. He looked concerned for me, like he had known me for years and had come to care for me like a family member. I ran a hoof across his soft feathers. Grooming the small bird soothed me to a degree, stabilizing my breathing. I continued petting him for almost half an hour. He had successfully cheered me up, and I thanked him for it before making my way to the bathroom to look in the mirror.
Sure enough, my eyeliner bled down with my tears. I began wiping it off, glad I only used a little bit of makeup. I re-applied my eyeliner which Red so graciously brought me with his small talons. When I finished, I gave the eyeliner back to Red, who returned it to the drawer he retrieved it from. I wondered how he figured out where it was, but I didn't feel the need to question it. I heard the front door unlock and open followed by Flare's voice.
"I'm home, favorite pony!" He said.
I ran to the front of the house and hugged him tightly. I had quite a story for the day to tell him.
For Chapter 5
I'm glad you talk about the little things that most people don't even consciously consider when they think "what would a woman do?" Well, there are all these small details that you manage to talk about really well, and reprogramming yourself to do a feminine walk rather than the learned masculine walk after years and years of it is a big deal.
Awww. You make the line so endearing! I never thought you could do that with the term "dangley bits" ;P
This is a good comparison between two characters. They are from different backgrounds where one family is supportive and the other is not, so as a result, you see different approaches to feminine practice. I like comparisons like this which display character depth.
Oh nice reference to Rarity there :)
I love that name :)
Aw, awkward attraction... :P
LOL i love how he just goes along with it. Smooth :P
Careful. I'm noticing things tend to be too easy for them at times. If you make things too easy for the characters, you miss out on some very good chances for conflict, which allow character-building and also encourages them to work together to come up with a solution.
Is it Guild Wars?
I like this calm chapter that celebrates the characters! :D On to the next one!
For Chapter 8
It's soothing to see her happy when I empathize with her so much...
Oh hey! The symbol from a previous chapter. And not only that, it's becoming an important character. That's really cool! I love her line "We are now both beautiful."
I like these little world-building moments where you get to see a few details about the world and how they relate to the character. This helps me understand how important it is for Aria to have an animal assistant and friend.
It's good to see that Aria's are still attempting communication with her, even if she isn't willing to talk right now. It's comforting to see Red care so much about her and help her out.
I do like this chapter very much. Calm, but with a bit of tension at the end. Your writing is improving by leaps and bounds! You're doing great! Thanks for letting me know about your new chapters. The feed icon and the way its setup does NOT help people trying to look for story updates.
7450948 The MMO was Skyforge. And I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter
7451192
Ohh Skyforge! I'll have to check that out later :)
7450984 the motel clerk was meant to seem a bit too kind with his gestures. Like he may have been trying to hit on her a bit. And I may have gone a bit too far with it, but it got the point across.
And the caffeine part is basically me every morning
7451059 glad you're enjoying
And I couldn't have something delivered without a Derpy cameo, that would be a crime to the fandom XD
7451092 you'll notice a lot of symbolism very similar to earlier points in the story. That's very much on purpose
7451218
ohh I like the referential symbolism to other parts of the story. Good work on that! I look forward to seeing more of it. I really do like this story. I have often wondered what kind of trans tale I would write myself. I keep coming up with various ideas, but never writing out any of them. Maybe I'm super-critical of the concepts I want the representation to be absolutely perfect? I should stop worrying, honestly :)
7451236 indeed you should. What my aim was originally for thjs one wasn't really for a perfect story but rather a charming one. I wanted the story to have a similar feel to the game Life is Strange, only less supernatural stuff. Which is why I imagine Aria's truck being somewhat similar to Chloe's. I also imagine the part of Canterlot the story touches on not being unlike the town from LiS. It's just the mall that had to be further into the city. As well as the park, I suppose
7451248
I'll keep brainstorming to come up with something. I like transformation stories (well, of course since I'd want that ability myself) but I kept thinking of trying to do some twist between ponies and humans. Like somehow having the transgender transition for a human get echoed in a pony transformation too...hard to explain, but I want it to involve Flutterbat and attraction to another.
I have heard so much about Life is Strange and I know it's apparently a really good story, but I can't play it on my current rigs. I'm hoping to make it one of those games I have time for when I get a new computer, whenever that is.
7451264 good luck on your story, I know it'll be great!
It's funny, I actually watched gameplay videos of all five episodes of LiS before I got the opportunity to play it. You'll like it, aside from the final episode which is a little trippy and removes the worth of most choices made in the game. But it does provide closure, at least
7451559 yus! *hugs*
Being a trans woman (male to female) i can certainly relate to many aspects of this story.
I love this story! Please continue!