When Yoda had explained the Dark Side to Sunset, He had said that it was everything the Light wasn’t. He told her, in his toady voice and weird dictation, to think of the Force as an ocean. He explained that all living things were individual water droplets in the ocean, each drop flowing and ebbing with the currents that made up the Force.
If the Force was an ocean, and the “Light” was water, then “Dark” was oil. It would flow in whatever direction it wanted, it would corrupt the water around it, and it would dominate as much as it could. Yoda had told her that the Dark Side could and would change an individual if they gave themselves over to it.
She hadn’t believed him when he had explained all these things to her, after all, hadn't she touched the darkness and remained perfectly fine?
Before she had wandered into the cave, she resolved herself to master both the light and dark, to prove Yoda wrong and to show him, like she’d show Celestia that what they believed about her was wrong.
Now though, dodging and deflecting her alter ego’s laser sword, she realized that Yoda may not have been exaggerating the effects of the Dark Side…
Her doppelgänger’s attacks kept coming, each strike that she managed to block caused her arms to shake. When the false Sunset would bring her lightsaber down, Sunset would bring hers up to defend and each time she would feel her bones creak under the power of her darker self.
“What’s the matter Sunny?” Her shadow spoke, her voice thick and nasally because of her bleeding nose. “Not gonna strike back? Where’s the fire? The anger!?” with that she kicked Sunset in the stomach, sending her crashing into the roots that made up the cave and instantly knocking the wind out of her.
Her lightsaber dropped from her hands as she tried to catch her breath, but before she could, her enemies red saber pierced the root next to her head. The hum of the blade filling her ears and the shadow of her opponent overtaking her.
Sunset didn’t know what to do, she looked up to her phantom and even though she tried to put on a brave face she felt tears begin to fall as her adrenaline dropped and fear replaced bravado.
The shadow’s sneer turned into a small frown at the sight of those tears, instead of pulling out the saber and finishing her past self-off she bent down to eye level with her and used her hand to wipe away the tears causing Sunset to flinch at the unexpected touch.
“Shh, none of that now.” She spoke in a reassuring tone “I don’t want to kill you Sunny.”
Sunset felt her eyes widen at that and she felt a little bit of hope rise within her chest. “You… you don’t?”
Her shade shook her head, “No, I only wanted to… test you” she put a hand on her saber and deactivated it before standing to place it on her belt, “You are me after all, at least… a past version of me.”
Sunset couldn’t stop her response before it was barked out “I will NEVER become you!”
Where she thought her proclamation would cause her shade to once more begin its assault, she instead tossed her head back and laughed.
Looking down at her younger self, Sunset let the smile her laughter had brought fall from her face, “You will become me, Sunset one way or another.” With that the dark sider lifted her right hand and sent a torrent of electricity towards her.
Sunset’s screams filled the cave, fighting to be heard over the crackle of lightning and the mad laughter of her doppelgänger.
Sunset Shimmer woke up with a gasp, her body numb and her mind in a haze. She looked around in surprise, after all she woke up to the murky swamps of Dagobah once more but hadn’t she died?
‘If so the Fields of Elysium look an awful lot like Dagobah’
Turning her head away from the swamps and towards the cave’s entrance that she had fallen asleep in front of she was surprised to see Yoda standing there, little clawed hands resting on his cane and a look on his face that she couldn’t discern.
She couldn’t resist “And Faust looks a lot greener than the fairy tales…”
Yoda didn’t get the reference to Equestrian folk tales, but he did understand the jab at him and in return smacked her upside the head lightly with his cane. “wander the swamps alone you did.”
Sunset flinched at the hit but didn’t say anything in return, one of Yoda’s cardinal rules in the weeks that she had been training under him had been to never go out alone. Dagobah was a world with almost no sentient life outside of its two Jedi inhabitants and a group of scientists that never ventured far past their outpost near the equator.
Traveling alone was dangerous and Sunset knew Yoda must have been worried.
Instead of bringing attention to that, she looked to her side for the lightsaber she had found only to see it wasn’t next to her like she had hoped.
“Lost something have you? Hmm?” Yoda prodded her with his stick “Sense in you much trouble, Sunset Shimmer, Yes.” He walked around her “much trouble, and much conflict, come tell Yoda what ails your mind.” With that he sat in front of her his legs crossed and his stick resting on his knees as he waited for her to begin.
Sunset inhaled sharply through her nose, remembering the blood red blade, the amber colored eyes of her shade, the feel of the lightning as it crackled across her skin, the smell of her flesh as it cracked, burned and scarred. Her fingers twitched slightly, only for her to clench her hands closed and begin to explain to Yoda her experience in the cave.
Yoda was silent throughout the explanation, not once interrupting or cutting her off. From what Sunset could tell he was calm throughout the explanation, but just like Celestia his face was impossible to read, and she wasn’t in the right mental state to even try to touch his mind through the force, though she doubted she could even glean anything from him.
At last Yoda nodded and stood up before speaking “A strange dream indeed,” He rubbed his chin as if contemplating what he had told her “a strange dream, vision of the future, you believe this could be?”
Sunset shook her head in disbelief, after explaining everything to him, from the lightsaber to the evil version of herself, the conclusion he had come too was that it was a dream?!
Instead of voicing her rage though she clamped down on it, flashes of those sickly yellow eyes filled her vision before she once again tried to let that rage go, “Maybe…”
Yoda nodded to her and smiled “Worry not, my young padawan.” He tapped her knees with his stick “Your first lesson for today, this is.” Pointing to the water that made up the swamp he continued “Always in motion the future is.” he nodded “Set in stone, this dream of yours is not.”
Sunset didn’t say anything, instead she nodded her head and with that the “lesson” short as it was, was over and they started to make their way back to Yoda’s hut for breakfast.
As she walked along side Yoda, she felt something warm drip down her nose, she reached up to wipe at it thinking maybe she had gotten some swamp mud on her face again, she pulled back her hand only to see blood coating her finger tips.
She stopped for a moment in surprise, looking at her shaking, bloody hand and then to Yoda who had continued on his way.
Sunset scowled and muttered "Only a dream my flank..." grunting in anger and with that all to familiar pang of betrayal in her heart, she clenched her fist and continued forward.
Darth Vader walked into his communications room, took a knee on the pedestal and waited for his master’s form to appear before him.
When Palpatine’s head appeared before Vader the Sith Emperor was surprised at his apprentice’s shape.
His cape was nearly gone, singed from blaster fire or a saber blade Palpatine did not know. His left hand was gone, and his suit was covered in…something. Palpatine assumed it was gore or dirt, he didn’t care to ask which.
“Lord Vader, was your mission a success?” The Sith Master asked his apprentice before probing into their connection for the truth. He doubted that Vader would lie to him, but one could never be too careful.
“Yes Master, the Jedi and Colonists were eliminated as per your instructions.” Vader’s emotions never wavered, the truth was not embellished and Palpatine was greatly pleased or he would have been if not for the part about the slaughtered Colonists.
“When, pray tell Lord Vader,” Palpatine felt his apprentice’s fear spike, good he still knew his place, “did I tell you to eliminate the Colonists?”
Vader was silent for a moment before he finally spoke “They were harboring the Jedi, Master.” He bowed lower “they tried to pass off my visit as a routine check on the colony and denied any claim to putting out the call for aid that they had.”
Sidious let his anger at his apprentice cool after Vader had said his piece. His apprentice had followed his orders and used his discretion to hand out punishment to traitors… this was good, very good, perhaps Vader wasn’t as hampered by his injuries as he had thought.
Leaning back in his chair Palpatine smiled “Very good my friend, your dedication to justice and purging these Jedi scum must be rewarded.” He nodded “Yes, perhaps some time to rest would do you well, you look worse for wear after all.”
Palpatine felt a spike of pleasure shoot through their link, perhaps pleasure at being praised instead of punished? He didn’t dwell on it though instead focusing on Vader once more he gave his apprentice his orders. “Return to your palace on Mustafar and get repaired and rested. I have further holocrons and teachings waiting for you upon your arrival. You have greatly pleased me, Lord Vader.”
Vader bowed his head “Thank you, Master” and with that Palpatine cut the transmission before turning back to his own personal holoprojector and his smile turned predatory.
In front of him was a live feed from Vader’s ship, Palpatine could see everything that was going on inside the ship, hear everything and he knew that Vader had tried to trick him.
Instead of anger though, Palpatine felt pride and a thrill he hadn’t felt since the night of the Jedi Purge. His apprentice could learn, he had tried to deceive his master and if it wasn’t for his pride, he could have pulled it off.
Palpatine saw everything, he saw how Vader brought three unremarkable looking women onto his ship. He was watching when his apprentice offered Sonata their “deal” and he saw when Vader took his own saber and mutilated himself to make the ploy look authentic.
Such dedication required a reward, and while Palpatine would enjoy crushing such amateurish schemes, it meant that his apprentice was a Sith, that he had ambitions that the lava on Mustafar hadn’t burnt away from him.
Sitting at his desk re-watching the recording Palpatine let lose a mad cackle, he couldn’t wait to show Darth Vader his place once again. For now, though, he’d let his apprentice have his toy and play his games.
After all, Palpatine had Maul when he was apprenticed to Plagueis, why couldn’t Vader have his own?
Sunset still has a lot to learn and so does Vader for that matter. I’m still loving this story.
9793050
Thank you! Ask any of my editors I didn't enjoy writing this chapter as much as I did the last ones, primarily because I had really enjoyed writing for Darth Vader more than I expected too. Next chapter is going to be fun though.
humm i dont think sunset is cut out to be a Jedi but i could see her as a gray images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/39aae080-9b8a-4771-acff-7621278f8d69/d9qfsaj-2a256972-6978-414d-bfbc-198869d74b57.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcLzM5YWFlMDgwLTliOGEtNDc3MS1hY2ZmLTc2MjEyNzhmOGQ2OVwvZDlxZnNhai0yYTI1Njk3Mi02OTc4LTQxNGQtYmZiYy0xOTg4NjlkNzRiNTcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.wh1YVUEANWF1KeOXcAuhdb711Bd6bi4j6mj-fnyjNvQ i think she has to much anger/passion to be a normal Jedi but i think she could make it as a gray pbs.twimg.com/media/CoQDgqIWYAAaxee?format=jpg&name=900x900
i do like is so far cant wait to see more
9793059
She's going to be herself no matter what that's all i'm saying.
It is kind of disconcerting how many people keep bringing up the grey jedi like they were some kind of gold standard that should be followed.
This chapter may be sort, but it is still rather good and I can't to see what happens next (especially with Vader and Sonata)
9793067
no what im saying is that i dont think she could follow the teaching of the Jedi and not fall to darkens in the end. they are to restrictive i know the gray are they are flawed but sunset and where she came from cant follow the teaching of the Jedi she has to much Passion,drive and anger if Yoda is going to teach her this way it is doomed to fail suppressing her will end in her falling much harder maybe slowly but she will fall in the end if she suppress what makes sunset sunset
I can't wait to see how this blows up in Palpitine’s face if Sonata finds she has nothing to live for and turns on the Empire. Just like in the Force Unleashed I can see this hurting the Empire big time.
9793067
What took you so long?.
Also is sunset Will face her inner darkness on cave dagobah once again when she really mastering both light and dark side so she become a grey side?.
Also more please.
9793103
media.giphy.com/media/LLx2nfxSmZkxW/giphy.gif
9793106
My question is what her lightsaber colour is grey,or yellow.
9793108
look at the cover art
9793109
I know is purple also Will she join a rebel aliance?.
Also will she net luke Skywalker and Leia? .
Also what lightsaber form is sunset use?.
GUYS!!! STOP ASKING DARK TO MAKE HER GREY SIDE! THIS IS HIS STORY, AND HE ALREADY HAS IT ALL THOUGHT OUT!!! Honestly, you guys asking him to make Sunset Grey is making him ticked off and now wanting to make her the most lightsided person ever. and also her Saber is Purple. There is a story reason behind it that he has shared with us and when it gets to it, he will. Dont ask him to make her Grey anymore. Ok?
Also Im one of the editors so trust me when I say I know what Im talking about here as he keeps us up to date on his story and already has told us how he wants to end it.
9793115 In order Saber:
vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/c/c0/Soresu1.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20080428144814
vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/4/49/Juyo.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20080813045623
Rebels: thumbs.gfycat.com/RapidBlueHawaiianmonkseal-size_restricted.gif
Luke and Leia: giphygifs.s3.amazonaws.com/media/BNKGM6uOgPhp6/giphy.gif
9793130
What do you mean not join Rebel aliance Also i kinda don't what form lightsaber that you send to me
9793129
We have to make her grey i.pinimg.com/originals/e5/b2/7d/e5b27df91ba74ec5bf176aba562d9758.jpg
need more
9793129
Hey man is just make more sense of she Going to be a grey a balance person also would you want to see her as a sith
9793135
media2.giphy.com/media/xTiIzwKOMCBgMuDKpi/giphy.gif
9793146
So what is he Going to be after she finished her training with master Yoda also Will she venture to galaxy and probably join rebel aliance to free galaxy from tirany of empire Also is Sonata is become a sith or not?.
9793152
media.discordapp.net/attachments/207507139130949632/613804102580699157/greysunset.png?width=740&height=677
9793157
Is look like discord take her color Mane from her
True true ... the future is not set in stone ...
scarred
Yes master, the Jedi and colonists were eliminated
at
I'm sorry, I don't see the significance of the nosebleed, and why it led to feelings of betrayal.
9793176
she smashed her shades face in with her head last chapter
yoda said that what she experienced was a dream
but she had a nose bleed for no reason and she could still feel the effects of the lightning so she basically felt like Yoda lied to her
9793172
thanks for pointing those out i finished writing the chapter at 4 am XD so i couldn't tell what I missed
9793191
Thank you. I thought that maybe it was a sign of Yoda doing something directly to her mind, which seemed... wrong.
9793197
If we're doing that, then enemies should be enemy's.
9793223
I added a line of dialogue before sunset's feelings are described at the end of her part to make it a bit easier to tell
You know I’ve always liked Star Wars but the one thing that has always bothered me is the kind of black and white nature of the sith and Jedi. I personally have always wondered to find a balance between the dark and the light and never take one side or the other and sort of FORCE them to work together.
9793276
9793287
Watch’s the video
That was rather informative video that I do believe is interesting but I still disagree as it feels I don’t really see why it is necessary for the light and the dark to fight at all.
I think this was good. I liked how the two Masters handled their Apprentices.
9793333
The light and dark sides are antithesis to each other, and it doesn't help that the Sith are opposites of the Jedi.
9793352
I’ve always wondered if it’s possible to teach the dark side of the force without going overboard about it. Like teaching it on moderation.
Like with the video drug example. If the dark side is a drug then what does that mean for prescription drugs you take in moderation.
9793357
jedi can use dark side abilities without the emotions that fuel them, but they are weaker than they would be if you used said emotions. the problem with using the emotions is that again, the dark side doesn't like to let go of what it has a grasp on and will continually try to drag it's users back towards the dark.
this is why the two people who helped Mace Windu Create Vaapad fell to the dark side in the expanded universe. they weren't able to channel their darker emotions without those emotions and the emotions of their opponents corrupting them.
9793362
Ok being completely honest I just hate the trope of how dark magic or things like that such as the dark side as a force that can make you turn evil.
Mainly because power in general can make anyone go drunk with power and do selfish things with it. And saying there is force that more often then not will make you turn evil if you use it just really bothers me. Mainly because there are many examples of real life things that can be seen as “evil” or dangerous that can be a force for good.
One example is nuclear energy as if used effectively can help power things for multiple life times but if used poorly can lead to many suffering.
Or the philosophy Capitalism as it’s a system that uses human nature for greed and want for more in life to be a force for good to benefit all with demands and services.
Maybe my philosophy just doesn’t work with the force like I think it does but i just thought this explanation can help you understand where I’m coming from.
9793373
I get where your coming from but the thing alot of people who watch or read Star Wars don't understand is that the Dark Side IS corrupting in universe. This is part of the reason why disneys canon irritates me because they're ignoring that fact.
9793379
Alright I get what your saying, but at the same time I think this probably has stemmed around ever since Star Wars creation With one of key aspects of the dark side. Emotion and Passion. You can’t just turn off human nature.
9793393
the thing alot of people don't seem to get is that the Jedi at least in the movies, never advocated for the removal and ignoring of emotion. they advocated for detachment from emotion yes, to give negative feelings to the force and let go of sadness. They stilled mourned, they still laughed and were happy and they still felt anger they were just taught to not let those emotions cloud their judgement or their state of mind.
9793395
Yea but that’s the problem some people are too emotional and I think the biggest problem with Jedi in general is that they never provide an alternative to safely channel those emotions in safe outlets.
For example I have some pent up anger so I get a punching bag and beat out my frustration and yell the bag my issues
9793400
The some jedi used saber duels for that purpose
9793414
If I may say something else. Because this universe is in a sifi/fantasy setting technically the force has never been stories in a truly throughly manner because that would take away the “magic” to the force and possibly with enough study could find a good outlet to use the dark side of the force responsibly with the light side as well.
This chapter may have been a short one, but the encounter Sunset had was strong & impact...
9793067
Because it fits her more.
And gray IS the balance of light and dark
9793414
9793493
Also to the author, you kind of unintentionally are giving the idea in your story that sunset is going to master both the light and dark side of the force.
1st there is the cover art visually telling the purple lightsaber. With the combination of the traditional Jedi blue with the sith red tells the audience at least visually that she could potential master both sides of the force.
2nd the fact your latest chapter that sunset vision showing her darker half still being nicer to her other self and refusing to kill her showing a “light in the darkness” kind of thing.
3rd. When Yoda looked inside her she saw infinite potential and the best way to do that would be her finding a balance between light and dark. Not being a grey Jedi, by being something completely different. Possibly even making a whole new form of of the force that combines the teachings of both light and the dark and making a compromise that can amplify both.
Story wise this has infinite potential to go with and people want to see Star Wars handled in a new way.
9793493
9793536
I’m not sure that gray would be the best fit for Sunset. Post reformation Sunset is usually treated as in the wrong whenever she gives into her emotions (especially whenever she gets angry or anxious). Instead, her strength lies in empathy, in being able to understand what makes others tick and being able to reach them. She expresses understanding, and a lot of the time has been in a similar situation, but she isn’t in that state herself.
For me, the most fitting path seems to be something like Mace Windu’s style, but with a Sunset twist. Since Sunset has magical Tree of Harmony protection from the dark side (and a potential out from a temporary fall), she can more safely connect with her opponents. She can play on the empathy of canon Sunset and try to truly understand her opponents (maybe even attempt to sway them or attempt to purge the dark side from them) and if that fails, use her understanding against them. She might go more older style Jedi (mastering emotions instead of detaching iirc), but it does seem to fit her quite well. Note, I have very little overall knowledge of Star Wars, mostly just stuff I’ve picked up from fans discussing it and some EU stuff.
9793493
To start off with, Gray is never a choice. Look at everyone in the EU who attempted it. They all, without exception, died horrible deaths, usually from falling to the Dark Side. Gray is the belief that you can walk the knife edge without falling into the darkness. That you can be a jerk without being a mass-murderer. That you can use Force Choke to just scare people, without actually killing someone, and that will be enough.
But the more you give in to the temptation to do selfish and emotional things, the more you're going to do them in the future. And from there, it's a steady slide to more and more. Eventually someone's going to realize you never actually seriously hurt the people you choke, and they'll put someone's life you care about in danger, secure in the knowledge you won't do it. Which is when you'll decide this time, it's okay. Because you're saving your friend or your loved one. Just like it'll be okay next time, because hey, you got results when you did it the first time, so why not again? And from there, off you go.
Gray is unsustainable. It looks feasible on paper, the way certain government models look feasible on paper. The USSR was certain they had a stable government, for instance. Everyone contributes to a common pot, and the proceeds are distributed fairly. The problem was that you needed someone who was more equal than everyone else to decide how it's all distributed, and it all went downhill from there. On paper, it looks feasible. In practice, it was an absolute disaster. Same with the Gray Jedi concept.
Another good chapter, looking forward to the next one.
9794240
The thing I see about "Grey" Jedi is something that's sort-of come up in the discussion previously, but has never been argued to me in a way that I've been able to totally agree with.
The Jedi look to the force for guidance, following where it leads them, but they very rarely actually internalize their own professed morality unto themselves and Own it. Why would they need to? Surely the force will always lead them down the correct path... Except... What happens when there is no "Correct" path... What happens when your only option is to figure out which path is the least of evils? Or in a different situation, when you have the occasional Jedi who meddles in "Dark" powers out of curiosity, but they have no internalized moral foundation upon which to fall back on when they run into a situation where, sure, they could work through things and find some sort of resolution, even if it's one that no one's really happy with... Oooooooor, they could just use their shiny dark powers and end things now and get one party everything they want at the expense of the other... Because they can, and the force is telling them that it's an option... And the force has Never lead the astray before now...⸮
A lot of "Grey" Jedi, at least those who were directly connected to the Jedi Order somehow, (Especially after Reconstitution of the Jedi Order following the Old Sith Wars and more-so after the the Ruusan Reformation,) realize this conflict, but still try to follow the general tenants of the Jedi order/code, and so it ends up being like you say. They've managed to internalize their morality to a degree, but recognize that it's still weak, and so they stop themselves before they cross "the line", and end up being more "Light" than true grey unless they teeter over that slippery slope and fall. They become hamstrung. They know How to use their more aggressive powers to do good, but also know that they have a very poor understanding of what of their "Dark" abilities could and should be used when and how, or their ability to recognize when a situation has escalated beyond a point where "Lighter" methods are applicable. They end up isolating themselves and becoming hermits, treating to their own desires, but only so far as to not disturb anyone else, knowing that while they believe in doing good their own moral convictions are too weak to hold up to the responsibility.
On the converse, though, it's a somewhat different story. The opposite; Sith, or Jedi who fell, but who find their way to the Light, yet still maintain the willingness to "Break a few eggs to make an omelet", so to speak. These people tend to find the actual middle ground more easily, but are also more morally questionable. They understand that the Ends don't necessarily Justify the Means, but also understand that oftentimes the inaction of the Jedi, "Grey" or otherwise, would lead to an even greater tragedy. They tend to prefer to act, using any means at their disposal, light or dark, to achieve their goals, knowing that the road to hell is paved with good intentions but walking it anyway in opposition to the True Evils of the Universe, because they know from experience what would happen if they fail.
As a third point, In the EU there are actually quite a few organizations of Force Users who do qualify as Grey, but who hold very little, if any, association with the Jedi Order or the Sith at all. Most of them lean either more light or more dark but still manage to straddle the middle ground without going to the extremes of either, because their doctrines and teachings are fundamentally different at their core. More often than not, they teach morality as being separated from the force, treating The Force as merely yet one more tool in their box. One that should be used responsibly for sure, but that responsibility is defined culturally. In some more extreme cases their order's culture instills examples of Blue and Orange Morality, rather than adhering strictly to ideologies of "Light and Dark" like the Jedi and Sith do. These are few and far between, though, due in large part to the pervasive nature of the Jedi Order throughout the galaxy instilling their own brand of morality on many cultures throughout. In any case, rather than binding themselves to "The Will of the Force" as is the practice of the Jedi, or the absence of any morality as is the case with the Sith, they define themselves and their actions by some creed, usually focused on their community, and defined by their responsibilities therein. Other times they swear fealty to a single individual, but with the caveat that they only do so as long as that individual remains morally sound themselves, shoring up their morality with a conviction of Duty. In all cases, while the Force is sometimes looked to for guidance, they do not rely solely upon it to give them direction, like the Jedi, nor do they seek to dominate it, as the Sith do.
The EU may be scattered with examples of "Grey Jedi" who arguably failed, but there are even more numerous examples of "Grey" Force Users , some of who were Jedi or Sith at one point or another, who, thanks to not being bound to the failed doctrines of the Jedi or Sith, found some measure of success along the grey path. Is it easy? Heck no. Do they have members fall to the Dark? Yes, but just as many also tended to drift "too far" to the Light and were equally cast out for failing their duties or being found wanting morally.
9794418
One of my favorite examples of a story about Jedi written right is "I, Jedi" by Stackpole, from the EU arc. It's a fascinating examination of what makes the Jedi organization tick from the perspective of a well-trained special operative who's looking at the organization both from the outside, and from within when they start teaching him the Force. To him, the Force is just another tool or weapon at his disposal, and he's openly critical of the Jedi only learning to use laser swords to solve all their problems. At one point, he mentions that "When the only tool you know how to use is a lightsaber, every problem looks like a limb." Which is darkly humorous, but also true.
It also covers the "Gray" dynamic fairly well. At one point, he decides that the Jedi are just too straitjacketed with their morality to be able to help him find his lost wife, so he goes solo and infiltrates the enemy command. By the time he gets yanked back from the edge metaphorically speaking, he's very close to walking right off the moral cliff, never even seeing the edge until it was almost too late. What makes that sequence work is that Stackpole builds to it over many chapters, having his character make little decisions along the way that seem entirely reasonable and sensible... only they lead to a dark place he only narrowly escapes.
"Gray" Jedi would fall into that category. For one thing, without any kind of established doctrine, it's largely up to each individual practitioner what it means to be "Gray", which has the side effect of greatly increasing the risk of a Fall. Second, when you consider that Dark Side practitioners are visibly and emotionally damaged by their use of the Dark Side, whether or not Disney considers the EU explanation canon at the moment, it's very clear that using the dark energy costs the user as much as their victim. Believing you could harness that kind of corrosive power without it changing you in the process is actually the first step in the wrong direction. And it's usually the first step the "Gray" Jedi take.