Writer/Developer for the official MLP trading cards and collectible card game, EQD columnist, retired founding staff of BronyCon and the Humble Brony Bundle, and generally an okay sorta guy!
When Pinkie Pie disappears overnight with a mysterious gem, Twilight Sparkle will do anything in her power to find Pinkie and bring her back safe. But can Twilight find her in time, or will Pinkie's disappearance put everypony in Equestria in terrible danger?
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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So, I've heard that some people like shipfics where both characters develop feelings for each other during the story, and maybe there's some adventurous stuff going on that gives you more to read than just the mushy stuff. Well, let's see how this all works out!
Thank you to Resketch for the cover art
Looks interesting
I'll read later.
Love your work Cupcakes
720579 How can you possibly like cupc- Oh you meant the author.
The last paragraph, is it a dream?
I bet it's a lucid dream and the princesses are in it because they have to tell Twilight about something incredibly important. Luna being the princess of dreams and all.
Goodness, you write one of the best Pinkies I've ever seen. She's so hard to portray without sounding obnoxious, and you did it near flawlessly. Excellent work so far. I've always admired you prose.
720712 Maybe something like that. Perhaps. Could be.
720720 Awww, thank you! Yeah, getting Pinkie "right" is really important to me. Whenever I see someone characterize her as if she hasn't change at all since the first episode of the show... no me gusta.
Im not a huge fan of adventure fics.
But this one has shipping in it.
Ill check it out.
...I shall be watching this with great interest to see how this will develop.
721098 Well, the shipping starts pretty soon, so hopefully it works for you!
723992 Soon, soooooon.
Adventure? Mystery? Romance? TWINKIE? Sign me up!
I really like how you characterized Pinkie in the first chapter, as well as Pinkie's relationship with Twilight. It feels like it builds on what we see in the show and includes some extra nuances. And I liked the repetition of "I can do it!" in the second chapter, with each iteration a little less optimistic and energetic than the one before.
Can't wait to read more!
731095 The original Google doc for this while it was untitled was "Twinkies are Delicious."
I'm really glad you liked Pinkie's characterization! What impression(s) about Pinkie's and Twilight's relationship did you get from the story? I was trying to go for only the tiniest bit more friendly than the show has shown so far, because neither of them have more than friend-like feelings for each other yet, so if you got an impression of more or less I'd like to hear it! Writing is a continual learning process, after all.
Oh, and next chapter coming very, very soon. Like, within the hour, probably.
731243
Not more than friendship--maybe, just maybe, a friendship teetering on the brink of something more. Mostly, in the show we see a lot of Twilight's irritation with Pinkie and Twilight rolling her eyes at Pinkie. All of that is here, too, but then, when Pinkie leaves the room ... Twilight chuckles, just a little. There's genuine affection underlying (overlying?) the irritation, and I think that's really nice to see.
Also, yay, new chapter!
731289 Okay! Mission accomplished, then!
I'm going to take a break to read Experimental Variables first. It helps me when I read someone else's fiction (especially when it's written in such a creative manner) before I go back and re-read my own stuff. Y'know, new insight, yada yada. Plus, I really enjoyed your dancey Twinkie story and I suddenly remembered you had another one I hadn't read yet! Plus, I like brown-nosing.
Edit: Well, that was a good reading choice!
Oh color me intrigued!
I'll tell ya, I adore Twinkie shipping, and I haven't even opened it yet. Why?
Because I'm singing Lean On Me in my head with ponified lyrics too loudly for me to pay attention to a story.z
[Edit] After reading I can definitely say that I'm looking after this one. Poor Twilight. Also, side note, I'm jealous of Twilight. I can't seem to stay up from 2 PM to 12 AM without nodding off afterwards.
Wow. This is really good so far. I am drawn to see what happens later :33
731884 Oh crap. Well, that backfired. Uh. Just pretend the title is "Twinkies are Scrumpdiddlyumptious" and try to read?
Well that chapter made me sad, but there's no sad tag so I'll take that as what it is. Very touching scene at the end there.
731961 Yup, the stress present in the second and third chapters should be as sad as the story gets. But, there should still be some strong emotions later. Suspense? Hopefully!
are you releasing them all at once?!
Thank you, hate waiting. feeling like finishing these in one session.
ooh this looks good now they can work together to get pinkie pie out of her perpetual dream
That part about hearing that spot of pink or feeling a warm blue-blackness of another presence...
Do or did you experience lucid dreams yourself?
And you know what? I was right about the dream. I love being right.
732311 Sorry, no, I'll be releasing these piecemeal. But if you track the story I'll be sure to make a linked blogpost that says the story is done! That's the best I can do I think.
732523 Maaaybe. Or something.
732579 I have never had a lucid dream I'm aware of, no. I just have a vivid imagination for non-visible phenomena. Or something. I'm just making stuff up.
731313
Heh, brown-nosing not necessary to keep me readin' and reviewin', but thanks. And I'm glad you enjoyed the other Twinkie story--it was kinda hit or miss with readers.
733476 I'm guessing it was hit-or-miss due to the unique style? I enjoyed the change of pace. Now, if it was a 10,000 word story written that way I might have gotten weary of it, but I think it worked how it was.
Review! I loved the entire description of Twilight entering Pinkie's dream--how it was all based on intangible feelings and impressions versus anything concrete. I also really enjoyed how you depicted Pinkie's reaction to Twilight appearing, how lonely Pinkie already is, how she's torn between hope and not wanting to be let down again. Which made the end of the chapter, where Pinkie realizes that Twilight is real, all the sweeter.
I do wonder why Twilight was able to enter Pinkie's dream when Luna couldn't. I don't know if there's an explanation planned for that or not, but if there is, I'd definitely be interested to know it.
733524 I'm glad those emotions came across so clearly! Thank you for letting me know!
Hmmm. I may need to further clarify the statement earlier by Luna that she couldn't enter due to the barrier, but due to Pinkie calling out to her friends Twilight was "invited in," and "invitations have great power here" equates to Twilight being able to get in even if Luna can't. I'll have to go back to see how I can make that more obvious, but luckily it shouldn't really matter in the long run.
Excellent so far, looking forward to more.
Wow, I'm loving this so far! I'm also wondering if the entire conflict is based in a dreamscape or not, but hmm...
TwiPie! Yaaay...
Sooo, what does this lead to?
And could you give me an approximate time-per-update thing?
734061>>734900 Thanks!
735747 It leads to shipping! And the actual "adventure" part, which isn't exactly going to be an adventure in the common sense of the term, but... oh whatever. You'll see, hopefully! And approximate time per update... I wish I could. I started this a week ago, but it could slow down a little. Or speed up! You can probably expect a minimum of a chapter a week, except BronyCon week.
733498
Yeah, mostly it was the writing style that people disliked, though a few others mentioned length and characterization. Still, it was a lot of fun to write, given its experimental nature.
733626
Yeah, definitely think the emotions came across really well.
The Luna thing is no biggie, either way. I just wondered.
You got the characters just right. My favorite was Luna. ^^ (Notwithstanding the fact that my favorite is always Luna.) It's not clear what exactly is driving the story so far, though. Waiting to see. :)
I was also singing "We all need somepony to learn on." That's probably part of why it hit 6-stars so fast on EQD, actually.
737107 I'm glad you liked my rendition of Luna! I'm really looking forward to seeing her permanent personality in Season 3.
Here's MY theory about the six-star thing: there's a 1-star bomb brigade (or one person who uses some script-kiddy tools) who goes around downvoting all the shipping stories on EqD, and there's this contingent of people who thus automatically 5-star all shipfics out of protest. So, the 5-starrers got to my story first, and got it to 150 votes and a 4.9, then suddenly within the span of just a half-hour it was ~200 votes and a 3.8.
But, either way, if people enjoy the story then I'm happy.
Pinkie! NO!
Got to love the interaction between these two. Twilight enjoying the puns even when she's too tired to do so, and Pinkie still managing to make her smile.
Okay, yeah, I'm in. This is going to be great.
738972 Yeah, all interaction between Pinkie and Twilight is like the highlight of the show for me. I'm glad that my translation of it to prose is entertaining you!
738983 I'm looking forward to what you do with this. It looks very promising.
This is looking incredibly promising. So far I am loving it! Your characterizations are spot on and your details and imagery are all fantastic. Not to mention your Twilight/Pinkie interactions are top notch.
I like the thought that Luna can enter ponies' dreams, that's really interesting, and I thought the descriptions of Twilight and Luna travelling was really intriguing. Poor Pinkie's reaction to Twilight appearing and her attempts to not get her hopes up to be hurt again was heartbreaking, but it was offset by Twilight's kinda goofy way of attempting to convince Pinkie that she's real. The effort it took to reach that moment of connection was worth it, and I think your pacing in that section was on the money and had real emotional impact.
Enough of me prattling, I'm looking forward to see where you'll take us and what kind of shenanigans our two favorite equines will get themselves into. Good show!
Thank you for not poofing!
made my day
740864 Thank you very much for the kind words, especially the very specific impressions and feelings. I really appreciate you taking the time to share!
Dreams, man. I can relate to Pinkie here. I can hardly count the times I thought my friends didn't like me and when I had a dream they came to me but none of them were tangible. It's a sad feeling.
Good work messing with the psychological feels, man. Makes me even more interested.
731887 Dude, you just made my morning with that.
You made me wibble.
Up-voted, favorited, and thoroughly enjoyed. Reasons include, but not limited to, your spot-on characterization of one Pinkamina Diane Pie. There is so much overreach in the fic multiverse that I really have grown to appreciate a well-rounded portrayal of Pinkie.
Honesty time: I do not go out of my way to read ship fic. I am going out of my way to read yours, starting today. Keep up the good work!
746275 Sounds like I kinda touched a nerve, there. I'm glad this actually helped you enjoy the story MORE, rather than bothering you!
755225 Whosawha?
756842 Well, I'm very glad you took the time to try out this shipfic-in-the-making and found it enjoyable. I really gotta get back into writing this tomorrow...
759924
Wibble (n.) The act of being so overcome with emotion that 1. The eyebrows come together and curve up at the inside. 2. The eyes become big and childlike 3. The lips and sometimes the chin shakes.
760175 My goodness. That sounds serious. ... I'm sorry?
WOOOW!!
I like how this story is going. I can hardly wait for the next chapters.
717173
That is a good story-genre, yes. So far, I'm pleased, though the chapters feel short. Maybe I've just been spoiled by things like Apotheosis and Within and Without. Hm.. Kind of nice to break the Twilight/Luna adventure-shipping (if I may coin a portmanteau) theme with some Twilight-Pinkie Pie.
If I have any complaints it's that the shift into Twilight attempting slapstick feels kind of abrupt in chapter three.
I love it so far can't wait for the next chapter^^