A young man working his way through life and writing for fun.
Chaos, from the Warhammer universe, extends its corrupting power into the land of Equestria, taking countless ponies into its service. Civil war begins between the princess loyalists and Chaos worshipers. Twilight must navigate the new war and try to leave it alive.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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To those of you who like or dislike this, I ask you to please tell me why. I really can't improve this fic or make better ones in the future if I don't get any feedback on what I'm doing wrong (or right).
Great description of the Tzeentch pony. not much to comment about this chapter since it actually really good, I can't wait to read about the Blood ponies(or Khorne ponies, call it as you wish).
BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!
another good chapter. I'm still worried about Pinkie
btw you mispelled "Heart" with "Heat"
I want to Know how this Plays out
)
MOAR!!!
just a thought, what if in each city they plan to attack is controlled by a (or more) faction of the Chaos Gods as a primary center of worship?
also I sense that there will be a Daemon summoning, or somepony turning into a Daemonic Prince (or Alicorn, I don't know...play with the ideas
oh yeah last thing : BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD
Been waiting for this to update. Keep up the awesome work!
blood for the blood god
Cadance killed by Fluttershy........
3484814
I know.
But sadly, the needs of the story demanded it.
DEATH TO THE FALSE EMPEROR!!
Zombie cultists...does this mean a Typhus stand in?
Hm... Chaos? Khorne, no less? Interesting...
we need the imperium to come in and kick some ass
What we need is more badass Fluttershy, and this story would be even more awesome!
...
...
...
BURN THE HERETICS WITH HOLY FLAME!
I don't know if it's going to happen, but I just want Twilight snap at one point and go all God Emperor on the Chaos forces.
3697947
Well, you're in luck then. She's got a couple more cool things to do before the story ends.
3698056
We shall see.
3698071 YES! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD! BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!
*BLAM!* HERESY!
*Drops dead*
Nas samus malleus!!
3699536
3700027
In response, (and the Black Legionnaire in me...)
For the Warmaster! Death to the False-Emperor! LET THE GALAXY BURN!!
678460 Add daemon weapons and armor is one way. The forces of Chaos can corrupt objects such as catapults. Catapults can be sentient and launch projectiles infected with Nurgle's Rot.
Make battles less of an infantry-only thing. Add a few sentences about catapults and siege machines duking it out.
We need casualty list for the individual battles and the war entirely. Also, general number of troops involved and categorized by what kind of soldier they are i.e. loyalist militia, royal guard, chaos fanatic, etc.
Also, can you give an estimation of the population of Equestria?
"Blood for the BLOOD GOD!!!!" said Daemon Primarch Angron as he bless Fluttershy with a Facebook like
Needs Daemon weapons and vehicles. Catapults with Nurgle's rot.
Nothing like warp-arrows that explode on impact.
Also, number of troops and casualties. Khorne and Nurgle would be proud!
3712080
Interesting ideas. I estimate the prewar Equestrian population as ~3 million. The Royal Guard's prewar strength I'd put at perhaps 15,000-20,000. Chaos strength is unknown, though estimated at 50,000+ at the start. Most of those are untrained cultists and little better than fodder. Civilian casualties for the war are also unknown. The Battle of Manehatten saw perhaps 12,000 Royal Guard casualties, 21,000 Chaos casualties (mostly the fodder). Daemons not included. The Battle of Fillydelphia saw 2,600 Chaos casualties, 0 Equestrian casualties.
I don't really consider siege weaponry to be all that advanced, especially compared to higher end magic.
a little typo there ^, and there's a small error in the amount of spaces along the third paragraph, I don't know if it's meant to be there, but it doesn't seem like it. I'm glad that I'm finally getting back at reading Fanfics after being busy with other things. This chapter was short and nice. Keep working, it's quite enjoyable
should be "since"
A comma would be best used here "her, doubly"
At first I thought that the Hydra was a Plague Beast, but reading more proved that the Hydra was turned into a Plague beast, which was pretty cool, and having the nurse fell before the hydra was a nice touch; it was interesting and it hooks the readers more (in my opinion)
Alright! Here We Go
3712885 Chaos wins whatever the scenario. The Dark Gods found a new supply of slaves, prayer, death and souls to feed on, without any effort on their part. Once Equestria becomes a Daemon World the Chaos Ponies, Buffalo, Griffons, and other creatures would be sent either to the Fantasy or 40k universe:
Five hundred thousand Chaos ponies have no problem destroying the Empire of Sigmar. Also, they could easily take a Feral world away from the Imperium of Man.
3711840 Indeed. Chaos loves their Daemon Engines.
Great story so far!!! Really hoping to see some more daemons getting involved.1.bp.blogspot.com/-_4jN28qZ51g/UT2nywapsjI/AAAAAAAAAMA/YW8mypoblxk/s1600/chaos+demons.jpg
Advantages of the Lost and the Damned Pony troopers:
-Access to Chaos Daemons
-Weapons, Equipment, Vehicles, and even BUILDINGS can be corrupted and possessed
-Warp psyker magic (Note: You did a good job showing that psykers can be from all Three sub-species)
-The Voice of Corruption: The Chaos Gods and their Daemons can talk to mortals either driving them insane, weakening their morale, or find a way to convince them to join the forces of Chaos
-100% Loyalty, to the Dark Gods. Once somebody or somepony defects to Chaos they are fated to serve in its name 'till either death or ascension. So Khronate Berzerker Fluttershy will either die, kill the rest of the cast, or be granted Daemonhood
-They research new technologies at a faster rate
So not only are the Chaos ponies outnumbering their 'Loyalist' counterpart, they are much stronger than them. It is fortunate that only the buffalo have joined the Chaos Bandwagon, for now, but fighting Chaos out in the open is suicide. Hit-n-run tactics are much better, though the Lost and Damned ponies can also do those same tactics to a higher degree.
There are other Chaos units that should be in this fanfiction:
-Soul Grinder: Neutral Alignment, it can exist on the material universe indefinitely and can 'beat the shit out of' Predators and Leman Russes.
-Flamers: Tzeentch Alignment, fires streams of flame with random properties
-Possessed Ponies: Ponies that willingly share their body with a daemon. They can rip that Arnold Schwarzenegger a dozen times over before being killed themselves. Typically armed with daemon claws and breath
-Obliterator Ponies: Ponies infected with the Obliterator virus, warp-based in nature, can teleport and use a variety of ranged weapons such as the automatic crossbow and very short ranged flamethrower.
-Mutilator Ponies: Close range variant of the Obliterator
-Chosen Ponies: Champions of Chaos, equipped with armor forged with the power of the warp which quadruples the strength and toughness of the warrior and wields a daemon weapon.
Possible Daemon Weapons:
-Daemon Bow: Fires arrows with properties based on the daemon that possesses it
-Manreaper: Oh YES!
-Bedlam Staff: Amplifies a psykers powers
-Crusher Castle: A moving castle, LITTERALLY. Bye bye Canterlot!
PS: Sorry about the second list, Chaos tends to have a more diverse unit base than its opponents.
PPS: This fanfiction should definitely be a Total War mod
3989874 You're a huge Chaos fan. I don't blame you, I am too. That's why I started this fic in the first place.
But don't let your fanboy-ism cloud your perspective. Chaos has many strengths, but weaknesses as well. The Chaos Gods are fickle, uncaring, and just as liable to mutate a loyal servant into a slavering monster for the lulz as they are to reward them. In addition, they hate each other more than they do anyone else, and are always preparing to backstab each other the moment it is opportune to do so. You'll notice that Fluttershy and Trixie's loyalty to Khorne and Tzeentch, respectively, hasn't prevented them from attempting to murder each other in the middle of battle. Finally, because order is so anathema to them, keeping any organized military campaign on track is like herding a group of rabid cats, at best. Chaos may win or it may lose, but this story isn't over til it's over.
One last thing: 50,000 =/= 500,000.
3989918 Can you also give an estimate to the populations of:
-The Crystal Empire
-Buffalo
-Griffon Kingdom
-Zebra Africa
There should be a battle, preferably at Los Santos, Stalingrad, or Beijing, between the pony police and pony cultist. Just to show another venue in which Chaos can damage its opponents.
3994226 Crystal Empire: As this takes place in an alternate continuity between seasons two and three, and the empire thus remains vanished: 0.
Buffalo: Prewar estimate: ~15,000 in various tribes. Current estimate: Unknown.
Griffon Empire: Prewar estimate: ~2 million. Contact lost after initial seizing of Manehatten and Fillydelphia.
Zebrica: Prewar estimate: 6-7 million zebra in various tribes and city-states. ~50,000 Equestrian/Saddle Arabian settlers. Contact lost after initial seizing of Manehatten and Fillydelphia.
Saddle Arabia: Prewar estimate: ~1.5 million. Contact lost after initial seizing of Manehatten and Fillydelphia.
Changeling Kingdom: Prewar estimate: ~8,000. Current estimate: Unknown.
FlutterRAGE!
Wow... I mean... for the Emperor?
This is why Blood Pact is better than Khrone worshippers. They are practical enough not to be insane yet still able to kick ass.
Anyway, is this a WH40k crossover or a Fantasy one? If Wh40k PLEASE add Obliterator warriors. They would give Twilight a huge challenge since they specialize in teleportation and ranged combat.
I hope to see an orbit-to-surface lance strike hit the horde. That'd be amusing. Especially the pony's reactions. At the very least, representing the opposite of chaos and fighting cultist hordes would be enough reason for the Imperium to not kill the loyalist ponies, too. Assuming they don't do it just to be on the safe side. Hmm, it is hard to say. I figure that, given how long the ponies have held out (the Imperium would find out, since they'd want to know how deeply rooted the chaos taint is before deciding what to do beyond just blasting the cultists), the Imperium may well decide to make the ponies a protectorate and use them against chaos as being particularly well-suited for the job.
That pretty much sums up the Imperium and the Empire in WH40K and WHFantasy.
All I gotta say right now, is that she better be glad that there weren't any followers of slannesh or nurgle, or even worse, champions, because it could have ended a hell of a lot worse for her.