World of Horsecraft

by duvagr007

Portals and Ponies and Maps, Oh My!!

Azeroth. A world torn by war for centuries. Home to neverending conflict and strife. Except for a few weeks out of the year when the fair comes to town. Then everybody is all buddy-buddy. This world has seen many adventures, some ended in triumph, others in the deaths of great heroes. Some even had a unique form of ending, where nobody is really sure how to categorize it. Like what happened to Frodo and Sam- what? That was Middle Earth? Oh... right. *Ahem*, like what happened to the Arbiter of The Covenant, a warrior who- really? Can't use that one either? Okay... Scott Pilgrim? Leon and Yuffi? Fox McCloud? Sonic? Well then who the hell CAN I use? Hmm... alright, I guess it'll have to do. Like the hero known only as Jake from State Farm, who was constantly questioned by the wives of men as to his garments. I'm sorry, I... I can't do this part. Let's just skip ahead a bit.

.... No, not there

Hm... a... giant moth? What?

Okay, who wrote this? Frank! Frank you moron... get your shit together! No, the squirel exploding was funny, but we're trying to be proffessional here. Geez... people around here.

Sorry about that. Now, where was I? Ah, yes. Introducing the heroines of our tale. No Frank, heroine as in female hero, not the drug. Idiot.

Our heroines, known as Twilight Sparkle, the element of Magic and Princess of Friendship. Seriously? Okay, whatever. Leader of the... Mane 6? What, is this from like, some kid's show or something? Oh... nevermind then. Leader of the Mane Six, consisting of Rainbow Dash, Element of Loyalty, Fluttershy, Element of kindness, Pinkie Pie, Element of Laughter, Applejack, Element of Honesty, and Rarity, Element of Generosity. Together, the six elements lived in Harmony, until the Fire Nation attacked. Nope, can't use that either, okay. Anyways, our story begins with these 6 mares. Oh, did I mention they're ponies? No? Well they're ponies. Deal with it.

Our setting is the town of Ponyville. How original. The time is midday, clear skies, 75 degrees farenheit with a southeasterly... Frank! Nobody cares about the wind! This isn't a damn weather forecast. Anyways, our heroines are gathered in Princess Twilight's magical crystal palace of friendship, huddled around the magical map of friendship, in the magical throne room of friendship. What were they doing you ask? Arguing.

"Ah'm tellin ya Twi, this darn thing is broken," exclaimed Applejack.

"It does seem rather odd that it would tell us to go somewhere that... well, quite frankly darling, it doesn't exist." Rarity, agreeing with Applejack, and everypony else for that matter, spoke rather pointedly. Nods of approval were had around the map, from all save Twilight.

"But girls, it's never led us astray before! Why should it be any different now? Just because we don't know where this is, doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Besides, there's even more than one problem! See?" Her words rang true, as there were in fact 7 flashing lights on the map. There were four main continents, one in the north, one in the south, and one each at the East and West. There was at least one light per continent, with the eastern one having two extra, and a light directly in the center of the map. This one appeared to be a whirlpool of some kind. A very, very massive whirlpool.

"Hey, I don't know about you, but I don't think there's a friendship problem in a WHIRLPOOL Twilight!" Rainbow Dash, the element of loyalty. Also a bit of a loudmouth. Plus, she's fast. And I'm not talking about her flying, if you know what I mean. You can't see it, but I'm winking at you. I know you can see it Frank. Yes, it WAS a dirty joke. Good boy... good boy Frank! Who wants a treat? Who wants one?? You? You want a treat? Too bad! No treats for you!

"Aw, c'mon Dashie! Don't be so negative! The whirlpool sounds like a lot of fun!" Pinkie Pie, able to see the posotive side of anything. You got the plague? She can see the posotive side. Leprosy? Yep. she'll see the posotive there too. You just died? HAH! No problem. She'll give you a posotive side so good, it'll make you wish you'd died sooner!

"Oh... um...I don't think so Pinkie. The whirlpool sounds... really scary. Spinning you and spinning you and.... eep!" And that one is Fluttershy. She's pretty much the opposite of Pinkie. But she's super nice. And she likes animals. I think she might be a hippie or something. Anyways, moving on.

"Look girls, I know this doesn't really look..."

"Reasonable?"

"Possible?"

"Awesome enough?"

"Fun?"

"Safe?"

"No... it doesn't look like this is a problem we normally deal with... but we have to. The map says so."

"Alrigh' Twi. So let's jus' say we DO decide to go on this here mission. How do we get from here," AJ points around them, "To there," pointing at the map.

"I... I don't know. Maybe the map will-" Suddenly, a bright flash lights up the whole- GAH! My eyes! Good grief that was bright! Holy smokes... ahhh.... the hell was that? Huh?

"Huh?" ..... oh right. All the Girls stare at the newly appeared... portal... thing. It sits at the door end of the throne room, blocking the exit. Beyond the portal, or rather, through it, a large, white city could be seen. Bustling with people, gryphons, and a bunch of weird mounts that take way too much time and effort to aquire. This, was the city of Stormwind. Unfourtunately, this is not where the portal will take them. They don't know that, because they can't hover their mouse over it to check. They just have to walk through. But, the portal will take them to Northshire Abbey. No, I'll describe it when they get there. Hush, you're missing dialogue.

"-epping through random portals that appeared out of nowhere. Who know's where that leads?"

"But Tiiiiiiliiiight!" Pinkie got down on her knees, begging her friend/leader/boss/owner to let her play with the magical portal.

"I said no Pinkie. Look, I'm not letting anypony near that thing until I know where it goes." Hey, you guys remember that flash from about a minute and a half ago? Put your sunglasses on, because here comes a bigger one.

*FLASH*

"Gah!" All the girls screamed in fright, not expecting another flash so soon. Once they cleared their heads, they saw none other than the Tyra- I mean their benevolent and caring ruler, Princess Celestia. Um.. ehehehe *ahem* *cough* New Lunar republic *cough*. I'm sorry, did you say something?

"My Little Ponies! I sensed a magical diturbance, and came as swiftly as I could! What has happened?" She looked upon her sla- subjects, a caring gaze at their seemed distress. Truthfully, they were all still reeling from the flash. (AHHHHHHH~ savior of the universe!) Twilight, being the unstoppable boss that she is, was the first to recover.

"Princess! Thank You that you're here. A portal just appeared in my castle! I don't know where it goes, or where it came from. It might have something to do with the Magical Friendship Map of Friendship though."

"The... what?" Twilight pointed behind her mast- mentor, showing her the magical map that took up nearly half of the room. Celestia, having never even heard of this map, was confused to say the least. "I... I don't... when did that even GET there?"

"A few months ago. It shows us friendship problems across Equestria, and we go and fix them. Pretty neat, huh?"

"A giant, magical map showed up in the middle of your throne room, showed you a place in Equestria, and you just... went? Without questioning it?" Twilight blinked at her mentor's statement.

"I... guess so. Yeah. Anyways, there's a problem. It's giving us seven new problems, and not a single one is in Equestria. Look." Celestia walked over to the map, peering over the features. Her eye's widened, she knew this place! Well, the east and west halves anyway.

"This is the world of Azeroth. I knew it well, a very long time ago. Before Luna's banishment, there was a bridge between our world and theirs. Hmm.... so many memories. I wonder how that stud, Prince Arthas Menethil is doing. Me and him go way back." Celestia broke out into giggles, but like... husky, horny giggles. It was... weird.

"Uh... princess? Ah hate t' interupt, but we still have a might' problem here."

"Ah, yes. Of course. One moment." Celestia disappeared with a flash (still bright!), and reappeared a few moments later with another. She passed Twilight an envelope with her magic. "Here. Go through that portal, find Prince Arthas, and give this to him. Give it to him alone, do you understand?"

"I do, but what's in it?" Twilight held the envelope up to the light. There wasn't a letter inside, just a single, square piece of... something. it seemed to be a photograph.

"Nevermind that. Just make sure he get's it. Now, I suggest you all go and pack, the journey ahead of you will be long, tiresome, and some of you may even die-"

"WHAT!?" they all exclaimed in unison.

"-but rest assured, I have the utmost faith you will be victorious in battle."

"Um... Celestia? What was that about dying, darling?"

"No time! GO!" And just like that, their overlor- Princess had vanished.

"Well," Twilight began. "We are so fu-"

SCENE

Author's Note:

Alright, I know what all of my stalkers are thinking: Duv, wtf bro? Where's dragon cleansing? What is this nonsense? And why do I have a raging erection?! All in due time, my friends. All in due time. Now, I plan to have the next part of dragon ccleansing out by Tuesday. The 6th, in case this takes a while to go through. If it's already past then, this is up, and Dragon Cleansing has not been updated, well then it's because writer's block is a female dog. Take care! And expect more of this because shit's funny yo.

Comments

[Scarheart]

Eh, they'll become epic mounts...*cough*

[SeventhBrony]

What happens when the Mane 6 all wind up in Azeroth?

Their minds collapse since they aren't used to the natural world, Flutters has the best chance of keeping it together the longest but she'll eventually go down just as hard.
Welp, I'm in! Let's see where this goes.