My Little Pony: Family Does(n't) Matter

by ProbableSarcasm

Chapter Two: The Said Misanthrope Hates her Misadventure

“So this adventure,” Twinkle Star begun, stuffing Twilight’s Special Book into her own saddlebag. “Where exactly are we going—because I would love to be ready for my likelihood of probable enslavement or death, either which doesn’t sound pretty.”

“Ah! Don’t worry!” Pinkie Pie replied as she grinned at Twinkle Star again, and thus making Twinkle Star even more uncomfortable and maybe nervous. “We’re going to pull a Rick and Morty and do some science-stuff without any knowledge of what it does!”

“…what’s Rick and Morty—actually” Twinkle Star shook her head, not even going to question some of the random things Pinkie Pie says. “—never mind, just some ramblings of the only sane pony alive.”

“Don’t worry about it; it was just a sponsorship deal that I got from Adult Swimmy guys, a free pool pass that expires two decades ago for just saying the name of a random show.” Pinkie Pie twirled her hoof around dismissing any sort of thought that even thought about being thought of in Twinkle Star’s mind.

“This is giving me a headache… and you didn’t answer my question,” Twinkle Star rubbed her face as she saw Pinkie Pie climbing out of Twilight’s window, setting up a zip line. “Zip lines, for real?”

“Yes-a-rooni-posi-toony!” For a moment there, Twinkle thought that she was insulted, but then realized it was just Pinkie Pie being Pinkie Pie—as stupid of a reason, that was the only explanation she had for this hyperactive mare she wish she can drop into a vat of chemicals. “We’re going to Fluttershy’s house!”

“I’m not going to Fluttershy’s house, it sucks, the animals are stupid, and it reeks of cowardice,” Twinkle Star didn’t like Fluttershy for her self-confidence, even though Fluttershy can stick up for herself at times—she was a complete and utter pushover. “It might ruin up my self-esteem.”

“Nah, it’ll be fine!” Pinkie Pie grabbed two hanger from Twilight’s closet and gave one of them to Twinkle Star, who promptly gave Pinkie Pie a confused and suspicious look.

“We’re not going zip-lining with hangers—we might as well jump from the window,” Twinkle Star growled flatly, bending the plastic hanger to prove her point. Pinkie Pie blinked and just ruffled Twinkle Star’s mane again, Twinkle Star nearly bit Pinkie Pie’s hoof; Pinkie Pie pulled her hoof away.

“Ooo! Fiesty!”

“Pinkie, we’ll get injured if we do this,”

“Ah don’t be silly you silly pony!” Pinkie Pie giggled, “That’s the fun of it!”

Pinkie Pie tried to give a reassuring smile, but it only added even more fuel to the fire that was Twinkle Star’s nervousness. It was probably the Fight or Flight reflexes going on, but there’s no way that this pink pony is even the safest pony to be around and Twinkle Star should run as far as possible as quickly as possible.

Pinkie Pie continued on her rambling, some of which Twinkle blurred out. “The random opportunity that we could break our legs and possibly our necks, okay maybe a rib, maybe our skulls, maybe our pelvis, maybe get a hernia in your case, swallow a bug, maybe a child endangerment lawsuit, breaking and entering… huh….”

“Is your brain finally working?”

“Nope! Me First!” Pinkie took a running start, bounced off of Twilight’s bed, landed in front of the window, and then leaped out the window with a loud cheer.

A hop, skip, and a jump—Twinkle was aware of this technique Pinkie Pie uses to get over her own fears, but Pinkie Pie seems to have the ability to flip the laws of physics on its ear and completely turn from solid to liquid and pop back into solid form in literal seconds.

“Yarr harr, fiddle—me not,” Twinkle Star dropped the hanger and turned to leave the room, but when she opened the door to find a familiar pink earth pony—that’s where Twinkle draws the line when it comes to logic.

“Hold on! No!” Twinkle Star’s eyes twitched, her mane starting to frizzle up. Twinkle Star’s mane was similar to Twilight’s, but lacked the color. It was grey-white, with one stripe of purple on the right side of her head. Her hair started to pick up in strands, as her brain couldn’t pool together the information process required to comprehend the impossible.

“No, no, no! I’m done with the whole dismissal reason; you have some power, I want that power, and you’re going to tell me exactly how you got it!” Twinkle Star pushed her left hoof onto Pinkie’s chest accusingly, but quickly backed away when she saw what was in Pinkie’s mouth.

The only answer Twinkle got was a toothy grin from Pinkie Pie, well—as much as a smile rope could give.

---

“Um, are you okay there Twinkle Toes?” Pinkie preened Twinkle’s head again, trying to elicit a response from the unconscious filly.

Twinkle Star had passed out from sheer panic when Pinkie Pie tied herself to her body, the physical contact sent Twinkle’s brain into a—fairly unorganized chaos that temporarily needed Twinkle to reboot herself to prevent from a complete and possibly lethal meltdown.

“You brainless dummy, I’d have for head for that,” Twinkle head-butted Pinkie away, snarling. “But I already have bowls in the pantry!”

Pinkie’s head comically concaved, her eyes stretched out of the puckered hole and she blinked. Her lips also joined her eyes. “You what, mate?”

“Oh god, what happened to your face?!” Twinkle Star’s ears flipped backwards as she stumbled onto her behind, staring confusingly—and a little disturbed—at the state of Pinkie Pie’s head.

“Oh, this? This happens sometimes—one moment please!”

“But—what?”

“One moment.”

Twinkle Star took a moment to notice they were in the Dark Forest, the one place Trixie had strictly forbade Twinkle from going—and Trixie doesn’t usually forbid anything, unless if it’s strictly a danger to Twinkle’s health.

(Like sticking your hoof into the blender, or going to Fluttershy’s Backyard without permission)

Pinkie stuck her hoof into her mouth and seemingly blew her face back into proportion, but her eye sagged a little.

“Uh, Pinkie?”

“Hmm? Oh! The eye!” She blew again, shooting her eye back into place. “Thank you, Twinkle Toes!”

“Don’t call me that—why are we in the Dark Forest—better yet, why are you dressed as a Princess?” Twinkle Star inquired, noticing she was also wearing a green tunic and a yellow night gown.

Twinkle Star growled, pulling at the tunic. “And why am I wearing such ridiculous clothes?! The Brilliant and Graceful Twinkle Nebula Star demands a swap!”

“That title sounds like a complete rip-off of Trixie’s title,” Pinkie pointed out, readjusting her crown. “Its kind-of a mouthful, why don’t you drop the ‘Nebula’ bit?”

“No,” Twinkle Star rolled her eyes and glared at Pinkie sharply, Twinkle Star crossed her forelegs across her chest.

“Okay-Doki-Loki!”

“Hold on for a second—did you put a plastic toy on me?” Twinkle Star raised an eyebrow when she found a gauntlet on her right hoof and a taped on foam sword on the other hoof. “Pinkie, I think you’re taking adventure a little too far—why can’t we play chess and call that an adventure?”

“Because that’s boring,” Pinkie complained, “And hard.”

“…actually, I’ll agree with you on that,” Twinkle found chess a waste of time trying to master. Twilight tried to get her to learn chess during that time when Twilight was still figuring out how to be a mom, Twinkle nearly swallowed a pawn while Trixie was trying to figure out what a Bishop was. “But is the outfit really necessary?”

“Yes, the outfit is necessary!”

Comments

[The mike]

damn, dis good

[ProbableSarcasm]

6396429
thx

[the other sans]

Hmm... Now I'm going to have to rethink on who was the actual mom in this regard since both are moms... Just call it my curiosity.