Princess Celestia was frozen.
Not often did her limbs lock up on her, even in her most frightening circumstances, like when her sister transformed into Nightmare Moon, or when the Changeling Queen invaded Canterlot and overpowered her. But when she saw Sky Eater face the distant, blue-clad humans with a predatory grin, movement was all but impossible.
“You know, Daybringer,” Sky Eater began, “If you want my personal opinion, these humans came at the right time. Maybe now I can educate you on something.”
Celestia became maddeningly aware of her own skin and the sweat running beneath her armor.
“That wasn’t part of my proposition, Sky Eater,” she said. “Leave them be.”
Sky Eater’s grin remained strong. “But, of course. In fact, I think I’ll just take my leave right now, save us all some grief.”
One armored foot stepped forward, and another chorus of metallic clicks and clacks rang into the air.
“Freeze! I said hands on your head and ON THE GROUND!”
Sky Eater stopped, his grin widening. “Oh, my. Quite the dilemma in which I find myself, it seems.”
Celestia clench a fist. “Enough! Why do you antagonize them?!”
“Antagonize? My dear, dear alicorn, I’m merely trying to respect your proposition―to leave this world and not return until the time is right. I’m certainly not hoping they’ll do something we’re all going to regret, and force me to… exercise extreme measures. Heavens, no.”
He took another step forward.
“Alright, ass clown! Not another step, or we WILL open fire!”
He stopped again and chuckled deeply. Celestia dashed forward and stood in his path.
“Do you think me fool, Sky Eater?!”
The robed giant crossed his arms, grin never fading. “Well, of course I do, but that’s hardly the point. My choices are rather limited, wouldn’t you agree?”
Celestia’s eyes darted side to side, biting her bottom lip. She looked back up at Sky Eater with a resolute frown.
“Let me talk to them,” she said.
Sky Eater scoffed. “Surely you jest.”
Celestia stood her ground. “If I can convince them the move away from the portal, then blood needn’t be shed.”
He held his grin. “And if you fail?”
Celestia stared hard at the bearded giant.
“Lady, get out of the way! Take cover!”
Sky Eater’s grin sharpened. “Diplomacy is a foolish option here, Daybringer. It is worn out. Old news, one might say. But my option is just dying to be abused.”
Celestia kept her hard stare. “You cannot harm them. Doing so will only destroy you.”
“Hm. I speak not of violence, alicorn. According to your little dragon’s memories, the youth of this world refer to it as ‘trolling’, and as a warning from one friend to another, it’s not getting old anytime soon.”
Celestia’s eyes narrowed. “And what exactly is this ‘trolling’?”
“Shouldn’t you be trying to negotiate with those savages right now?”
The former alicorn’s nostrils flared.
“Proceed. I will remain here and squeeze as much out of this as I can.”
The wind picked up, and Celestia’s already-flowing hair whipped about. She looked up and saw more strange metallic creatures, soaring toward them with spinning blades, bright light beaming from each of them.
“You’d better hurry,” Sky Eater said.
He crossed his robed arms and lowered his head. His eyes lost their glow and closed gently.
Rainbow Dash grunted and shouted as five pairs of arms held her back.
“You backstabbing, ungrateful bitches!”
Sonata winced, Aria frowned with crossed her arms, and Adagio remained impassive.
“You enjoy the show? Huh?! You get off watching us die?!” Rainbow’s curled fingers reached for the sirens, but her friends held fast.
“Ugh! Back off, Dash!” Applejack shouted, yanking at the athlete’s torso.
“Listen to her!” Rarity chimed, pushing against Rainbow’s chest alongside Sunset Shimmer. “We’re in enough trouble as it is!”
Soon enough, with Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy constricting both legs, Rainbow ceased. The blue girl stood her ground, shaking, heaving, and glaring at the sirens.
“Why?” Rainbow asked. “Why did you just stand there? Why didn’t you try to stop him?” Neither siren gave her eye contact. “Why?”
“We just…” Adagio began, still unable to look at Rainbow. “We can’t. He’s our father. It’s not our place to interfere.” Her magenta eyes whipped to Sonata and frowned. “Or to disobey him.”
Sonata wrung her hands together and stared at the ground.
“That’s not good enough! We’re supposed to be friends!” Rainbow argued.
Aria threw a menacing glare at the colorful athlete. “Guess we’re square then, right?”
Rainbow frowned harder. “What are you talking about?”
“The better question is, why didn’t you tell us about the portal?” Aria growled.
Rainbow’s glare crumbled away.
Adagio chimed in, “The gateway to Equestria―to our true selves… Why did you keep it from us?”
Rainbow couldn’t find words. Sunset Shimmer stepped up beside her.
“I tried to tell you earlier, girls,” Sunset said.
“And how does that count for all the months you didn’t tell us?” Aria demanded, her tone raised a bit.
Sonata’s sad moistening eyes slowly rose to Pinkie Pie and stayed their. “Didn’t you trust us?”
The averted eyes, rubbed elbows and bitten lips said it all.
Adagio glared. “Helping us keep our apartment. Acclimating us to Canterlot High. Sitting with us for hours, listening to our stories. Helping us write new songs. What exactly was it all for? To keep us blind, deaf and dumb? To keep us on a leash?”
Sunset glared right back. “That’s not fair. With everything that happened with that whole ‘Battle of the Bands’ thing, we couldn’t be too careful. We had no idea if you’d gain your powers back if you left. Worse, we couldn’t be sure if you’d leave Equestria in peace.”
Each Siren looked as though they’d been slapped.
“Is that what you really thought?” Sonata said, her own frown finally forming. “That we’d just throw everything we’ve learned with you away? That we’d try to enslave Equestria again?”
Sunset narrowed her glare. “Would you have?”
Sonata gasped with a hand to her chest
“Sunset!” Pinkie admonished.
“If your father never knew about all this, and I told you about the portal, would you have spared Equestria?”
Long seconds of silence curdled the air. Adagio stared. Sunset stared right back. The latter won that contest, and her brows knitted.
“Look… I’m―”
“Stop.” Adagio rubbed her forehead with her thumb and index. “It doesn’t matter.”
Sunset stepped forward. “Yes it does.”
“No it doesn’t...” Adagio turned away and stared sadly at her father. “We’d have had no choice. One way or another, Equestria would’ve had to fall by our song.”
There was another tide of silence.
“Your mission…” Sunset muttered, brows still knitted. “The one your father was talking about―’your role in the cosmos’... That was it, wasn’t it?”
“No,” Aria answered. “Well… not entirely. It’s complicated.”
“Don’t give me that,” Sunset snapped. “With everything that’s already happened, and what we’re up against, we’ve earned a straight answer from you.”
Each siren turned to look at the fiery-haired girl.
“You want the truth?” Adagio asked. The Rainbooms nodded. The eldest siren turned back “Right. The truth...”
Whispers. Loud, unending whispers.
It had started only minutes ago, yet Twilight could’ve sworn it’d been longer. At first she merely ignored them as she sat on her throne, a sleeping Spike curled on her lap. Then the whispers persisted, growing louder, like thousand of needles scraping at a chalkboard.
She’d already levitated her little dragon to Rarity. The unicorn may’ve indeed asked what was troubling her, but Twilight couldn’t hear her. Instead, she began pacing around the rotunda. Eyes narrowed and lips pursed, Twilight focused on the whispers, on what they said.
Many times she very nearly shouted ‘Shut up!’, or ‘Does anypony else hear that!’, but surely Applejack and Rarity would’ve thought she’d lost her mind. Ironically, Twilight was very close to losing her mind.
Everytime she came close to deciphering one whisper, the rest intensified, and she’d be right back where she started.
“Leave me alone…” Twilight couldn’t tell if she’d whispered that, or shouted it.
She looked to her two friends, and of course, they were staring at her. Applejack hopped off her own throne and sauntered toward her. Twilight paced a little faster.
The whispers exploded with ringing and screeching, and Twilight nearly planted herself to the floor and shoved her hooves in her ears, but she narrowed her eyes and held fast, still dissecting what she could.
Hear me, Twilight.
Look to the sky, Twilight.
You’re letting her down again, Twilight.
Twilight.
Twilight.
“Twilight?” Applejack’s voice cut into the voices, and silenced them completely. “I asked if you was alright.”
Twilight didn’t stop pacing. “I-I’m fine. Just a little stressed.”
She wasn’t looking at her, but Twilight just knew that Applejack’s eyes lidded.
“Sugar, Princess Celestia’s barely been gone ten minutes. We gotta have faith that she knows what to do.”
Twilight stopped pacing, glanced blankly at her friend, and started pacing again. Anything Applejack may’ve said was drowned out by the returned whispers. This time, they were concise. Clear. And she recognized the voice all too well.
Celestia will fail you.
And you will fail her all the same.
“Gah! Shut up!”
Twilight’s eyes widened at her own shout. She turned around and saw a shocked Rarity and Applejack.
“D-darling, I was merely saying we should check up on Rainbow Dash.”
Dwell in joy, Twilight.
While you can.
Twilight could feel her eye twitch and her teeth clench. “You’re… you’re right, we should check on her.”
“Check on who now?”
The mares turned left and saw a smirking Rainbow Dash with a bandaged left wing and splintered left arm.
Applejack shook her head and laughed. “Leave it to you to get hit by lightning and walk it off,” she said.
Dash’s smirk widened. “Heh. Barely felt a thing.” Her left wing twitched. “Ow!”
Fluttershy walked up behind her. “Oh, I told you I should have tightened your bandages.” She reached for the singed wing. “Here, let me―”
“No!” Rainbow shrieked, jolting back from the yellow hoof. “I-I mean, you know, there’s no need.”
Savor their presence, Twilight.
Applejack rolled her just before she noticed something amiss. “Say, where’s Pinkie Pie? Wasn’t she with you two?”
Both pegasi shared a worried glance.
“It was the strangest thing,” Fluttershy began. “She hardly said a word while Dashie was uncon―”
“Ra-HARGHM!”
Fluttershy’s eyes lidded. “While she was resting her eyes, that is. She just… stared out the window, looking at the clouds.”
Savor it.
Rarity raised a hoof to her chest. “Heavens, I do hope she’s alright.”
Rainbow frowned. “Um, hello? Struck by lightning here.”
“Whatever Miss ‘Barely-Felt-A-Thing,’” Applejack teased. She smirked at Rainbow’s low grumbles. “I’ll go and check on he―”
“I’ll go.”
All eyes whipped to Twilight. Before Applejack could even protest, the alicorn was already trotting past them all.
“I need something to occupy myself, anyway.”
“But… I… Alright then?” Applejack muttered.
**********
Twilight knew Pinkie Pie.
As such, she knew that a quiet Pinkie Pie was usually a bad sign. The alicorn wasn’t sure how long she’d stood at the door, watching her friend stare out the window. She wasn’t even sure if Pinkie had noticed her come in.
Twilight walked forward. Pinkie’s ears jolted up, then relaxed again. Twilight sat beside her in momentary silence.
“Hey,” Twilight said.
“Hey,” Pinkie replied.
Yes. Something was definitely eating at her.
“The others are worried about you,” Twilight said. “What are you thinking about?”
“What you said before the princess left through the portal. What he planned to do?”
“Yeah?”
Pinkie raised her hooves to the windowsill. “I don’t want anypony to get hurt, but that’s exactly what he’s going to do, isn’t it?”
Suddenly Twilight could feel the bags beneath her eyes. “Not if Princess Celestia has anything to do with it.”
“Yeah. Well, I was just thinking that…” Pinkie sighed. “I get it.”
Twilight turned to the baker with a hiked brow.
“The things he said he’d do to your friends on the other side? I… I get it.”
“Pinkie, that’s―!”
“I’m not saying I agree with it!” Pinkie snapped. She curbed her tone. “I’m just… When you told us what he was, what he’s done―you know, like how you did with the sirens―I felt the same way about him that I did about those three.”
Twilight tried to cool the burning lump in her chest with deep breaths. “What did you feel?”
“That he was a big, dumb meanie-pants that needed more rainbow lazers in his diet.”
Twilight snorted with a crooked smile.
“But then you said he was their father, and all I could think was ‘I get it.’”
The burning in Twilight’s chest grew. “Why? Surely you’re not justifying his actions…”
Pinkie turned to the other mare with a sad frown. “When a momma duck leads her ducklings from pond to pond, she doesn’t do it because she thinks crossing busy roads are fun or exciting. She does it to take care of her babies. When a momma lioness sees a antelope that’ll feed her cubs for a week, she doesn’t hunt it for sport or pride. She does it to take care of her babies.”
“What are you getting at, Pinkie?”
The earth pony sighed. “I don’t know. I just…” She pressed her forehead against the window pane. “I can’t stop thinking about what I’d do if someone ever threatened Pound Cake or Pumpkin Cake. I know they’re not mine, but I’ve been with them since they were born and just the thought them being hurt makes me so... “
Twilight gave a cautious look to Pinkie’s now-shaky hooves.
“I get it. That’s all.”
Pinkie’s hooves left the window sill, and she resumed her thousand yard stare into the blackened sky.
The whispers returned in kind, and Twilight was barely aware of her own pained grunt. She massaged her temple, and stared out the window too.
Stand and face me, Twilight.
“Pinkie?”
“Yeah?”
Twilight pushed the window open, the wind whipping her mane about like leaves in a hurricane.
“Don’t tell the others I’ve gone.”
She didn’t wait for a reply. She spread her wings and darted toward the sky.
**********
Twilight was no stranger to peril. From rancid hydras to three-headed hell hounds, one could say that she was an expert on the subject.
But if someone ever told her she’d be riding upwind through webs and webs of sky-shattering lightning, she laugh them right out of Ponyville.
Yet, there she was, dodging and deflecting said lightning with sharp eyes and bared teeth. She needed only to reach above the clouds, and she’d be… relatively safe.
She did reach above the clouds, and what she saw nearly clamped her wings shut. For mile―hundreds, maybe even thousands of miles―the sky was practically embraced a serpentine body. Her jaw fell open as she watched the slithering rollercoaster of dark-green scales.
She looked up to another layer of clouds; impossible by normal means, but they were there. From those clouds, a titanic hand descended.
Directly toward her.
She very nearly darted away, but held her position with a resolute frown. The hand stopped, turned up, and opened. The invitation was almost painfully clear.
Before she knew it, Twilight was shifting on her hooves, the scales beneath her burning and freezing both at once. Though, she may have been just the slightest bit worried that those mountainous fingers would close and crush her.
She started to regret this decision.
“And so we meet again, Twilight Sparkle. Face to face.”
Twilight’s ear and eye twitched at the deep echo in her skull.
“Err! I’m right here before you. Get out of my head…” she muttered through clenched teeth.
“This way is best. Heed me when I say that speaking aloud is…”
PROBLEMATIC
Twilight’s ears caved and wilted, her head pounding, losing her balance and stumbling to her knees. With shaky legs, she stood straight again, sweat dotting her now-worried face.
“My words are forces of nature, young one. Every breath a hurricane. Every syllable an earthquake. I am far too close to this world to speak.”
Twilight stopped the insufferable shaking in her legs, and locked onto eyes that dwarfed her castle a thousand times over. “What do you want from me?”
“A little of your time, princess,” Sky Eater said. “I surmise that it’s fair to enlighten you on current events, and what is in store.”
Twilight narrowed her eyes. “Save it. I already know what’s in store. You’re going to leave my friends, and both our worlds in peace, or suffer the consequences.”
For a moment, Twilight thought it a tad excessive to stomp her hoof at her last word. The rumbling beneath her and the gargantuan fingers curling and twitching only affirmed that.
“I will never understand how you ponies think you can talk to just anyone like that. Least of all, you.” Sky Eater’s fingertips sparked like lightning rods. “Death’s gaze falls squarely on you and those who dare defile my beautiful sirens, and you would assume that tone with me? I could crush you like an ant, Twilight Sparkle. With an honest-to-God smile on my face.”
Twilight swallowed, but she didn’t gulp. That was a faux pas she could ill afford.
“But you won’t… will you, Sky Eater…?”
“Do not misunderstand. Your time will come. The humans will fall.”
Twilight glared at those eyes shining above the clouds.
“But as I told you, I wish only to enlighten you on current events, and what is to come,” the titan said. “Right now, your mentor stands between me and retribution. I imagine her being there in your stead is a ‘safeguard.’”
Twilight scoffed. “You figure that out all by yourself?”
The sky was hammered with ear-splitting thunder, and the landscape-like palm jumped and twitched. Twilight face planted into a diamond-hard scale. She picked herself up and stared into the sky again. That time, she couldn’t help but gulp when an enormous reptilian face pushed through those clouds.
“Tread carefully, alicorn. You try my patience.”
Twilight said not a word.
“Hm. You two are so much alike it’s almost frightening. Makes me wonder why you’d promise to destroy the portal with her on the other side.”
Twilight’s eyes lit up as though she’d been caught stealing. From above, the giant face grinned.
I would’ve never imagined you to agree to that. You, whose very life and destiny was shaped by her hooves. You, who would’ve never known companionship without her intervention. Yet you would condemn her to an eternity in that ape-infested world?”
Twilight hesitated.
“I-if it means stopping you…”
Sky Eater’s grin remained. “You’re as cold as ice, Twilight Sparkle. Do you know that?”
Her teeth caught her bottom lip, now staring at the scales beneath her.
“Tell me. Did you also agree to let my children and I go? To return to this dimension and ‘continue our role in the cosmos?’”
Twilight’s eyes lidded.
“Then let me ask you this; do either of you truly know our role in the cosmos? Do you know how Equestria plays a part in that role?”
Her eyes hiked up, and she threw her eyes back up at his.
“When my sirens first came to this world, their goal was simple: enslave, manipulate, conquer. It is their nature, their purpose, and they’ve become… quite proficient over the eons. Many worlds became slaves to their whim, and just as many tore themselves apart by their command.”
“But why?! Why divide and conquer?” Twilight demanded.
“I serve the Great Balance of the universe, alicorn. Such has been my task since the beginning of time. The power to destroy… But, as you already know, your Creator limited that to some degree. Even after my banishment from the Eternal Throne, I could only devour worlds that could barely sustain life. In come my offspring.”
Twilight’s eyes went wide. “You… you can’t mean…”
“With every note, a community splintered. With every lyric, a city crumbled. With every melody, a country divided. War, destruction, and chaos followed every single time. When all was said and done, when resources were drained to fuel those wars, when populations decayed from famine and pestilence, my role could then be fulfilled.”
Twilight could no longer feel her legs, and she fell back on her haunches, jaw hanging open.
“My presence has darkened the sky of every dead world. On my roar alone, their continents would crumble and sink into the oceans. Magma would burst to the surface and burn the plants, poison the air. Tidal waves would cleanse what remained, and I would devour my prize. Rather efficient, if I do say so myself.”
By now, Twilight eyes were shifting side to side, processing, dissecting the information. Her heart raced. Her limbs numbed. Her breath became thin and heavy.
“How many… How many worlds?”
Vertigo threatened to cripple the young alicorn. G-force weighed on her back as the hand she stood on ascended. She was closer now to Sky Eater’s hideous face then she ever wanted to be.
MILLIONS…
Her ears caved again, and that time she was almost certain they were bleeding. Even then, she could hear it―the deep, distant crumble of earth. It now took everything in her just to stop shaking. She failed.
“So that was your plan all along,” Twilight said. “That’s why the sirens were here. Because of you, so you could destroy us.”
The serpent snorted, and the clouds swirled and parted.
“Don’t be so simplistic. Why would I want to destroy the key to my children's’ salvation?”
Twilight felt a headache coming on. “What?”
“The Eternal Throne… That is where I belong, where my daughters belong. Paradise made real. A realm so far beyond suffering few can even imagine it. Their mother… she denied them that, as she had denied me.”
“Mother?” Even though she felt it, Twilight couldn’t stop her eyes from widening. They widened so much that it actually started to hurt. “That… that can’t be.”
“I speak only the truth. That said, it is proper for me to tell you what will happen next.”
Twilight cursed herself for gulping yet again.
“Your mentor will let my children and I go free, and we will return to the darkness above. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, maybe not a thousand lifetimes from now, but one day, their voices will be restored. We will return to Equestria and they will sing the songs of ages past, to do what they were born to do. And upon their success…”
Twilight could feel her coat bristle and her teeth bare.
“The gates of the Throne will open, and after eons of hiding, the wench who cursed me will finally come out to protect her little pet project. And she will fail.”
Twilight growled.
“I will take her precious creation and twist it, mold it, degenerate it into a dark, lifeless tomb right before her eyes. Then I will destroy her just slowly enough for her to realize what she will lose. I will devour her as I should’ve done billions of years ago, and her legacy will become mine.”
“You… you’re insane…”
“I will return to the Eternal Throne with Adagio, Aria, and Sonata. The power to create… the power to destroy. With both at my fingertips, my children will sing to the symphony of destruction that will start the cosmos a new. Countless worlds will die, and from them will come countless others.”
Twilight’s horn glowed, and she had no idea what she was going to do with it.
“Life will start again, and the generations will know of the one true creator. But most importantly of all, my children can live the rest of eternity in peace―”
“HORSE APPLES!”
Sky Eater reeled back like he’d caught an unpleasant stench.
“Are you even listening to yourself?! Do you even know why you’d do such a thing?!” Twilight shouted.
Sky Eater’s eyes narrowed. “What I do, I do for the good of my family.”
“I don’t believe you! You talk like you do this out of love, so the sirens can have a better life?! NO! You’re doing this for you!”
A low growl rumbled the sky.
“Your daughters have a better life! They have friends who care about them, people who stand for them, who nurture them like they were their own! You! You want to take that away just to get back at their mother?! You don’t care for them at all!”
“Choose your next words very carefully, alicorn.”
By the time the red faded from Twilight’s vision, she noticed the mountainous fingers much closer than they were before. Suddenly, breathing took a considerable amount of effort.
“Listen to me. You’ve roamed through Spike’s mind, I know you’ve seen it too. The things we’ve been through, what we’ve learned, the obstacles we’ve overcome. How we’ve gotten on each others nerves. How we can’t seem to stop teaching each other one thing or another.” Twilight held back a smile. “Family―my family―in this world and the other... “
Sky Eater’s eyes remained narrow.
“If you truly care for your family―if you understand the sacrifices one makes to protect them―then how can you threaten to kill somepony else’s?”
Silence followed, filled only with distant thunder and chilling winds. Sky Eater uncurled his fingers, and Twilight wiped away tears she didn’t even notice until then.
“Time is short,” Sky Eater said. “You can end this one of two ways; you can return to your castle, disobey your mentor and destroy the portal prematurely, or…”
Twilight knew exactly what he was suggesting. And it was stupid.
“Heed my warning, Twilight Sparkle. If you would protect your own―if you would thwart my intentions―your next move… is critical.”
Sky Eater flipped his hand over, and Twilight screamed as she fell through the clouds. Through her spiraling descent, she saw land again. She opened her wings and hovered just below the swirling black clouds. Lightning lashed within those clouds, a web of chaos raging between her and the Destroyer of Creation.
“I trust you’ll make the right choice.”
As the clouds swirled to a close, Sky Eater’s eyes lost their glow and closed.
Twilight’s ears drooped as she stared down at Equestria―her castle. The choice she had to make... she knew that choice would be the right one. It had to be.
It just had to...
6431213 Eh, I'll just infect him with MRSA.
NOTHING CAN STOP MRSA!! NOOOOOOTHIIIIIIING!!!!
Still with ya! This is a great chapter, can't wait to see what comes next!
*Alondro, the Deus Ex Insert, the Troll King, He Who God-Modes So Outrageously He Needs To Keep Making Even Longer Titles For Himself smirks at Sky Eater* Nice name. Your mom had delusions of grandeur that severe, eh? Subtlety's not a strong suit for your sort, I take it. Usually accompanies a significant disability in frontal cortical function, I've found in my clinical experience.
*Alondro then unsubtly kicks Sky Eater in the nuts*
*Alondro then browses the superabundance of blathering boringness spouted by the titanic twat and finds...
* PPFFFFFTTTT!!!! Oh gawwwwwwwd! You're one of thooooose guys again? One of the "hurr durr, I R TEH balance of da un-eye-verse! I R knot evil, cuz blahblahblahblah!!" Get OVER yourself! I've been around long enough to know the universe doesn't care about such nebulous abstract concepts! It's nothing more than the single most common and severely over-utilized excuses for wanton destruction by god-tier asswipes EVER!! I should erase you just for being so BORING and unoriginal with your delusions!
*Alondro then proceeds to kick Sky Eater in the nuts HARDER until the giant green jackass falls to what passes for knees and calls Alondro his daddy to make it stop*
Aww, I'm flattered.
Anyway, looks like Sky Eater has domestic problems. Or, more like, he is his own domestic problems. Is there a medicine to make someone less of a douche bag? Because if there is, Sky Eater should be taking it on a regular basis. (I'm not insulting the story here, I just wanted to note that if I met someone like that in person, I would punch them in the neck, repeatedly.)
The only problem I see here is that I didn't get some of the things that were supposedly implied. While it has been a long time since I read the last chapter, I think it still might be a good idea to explain some of that stuff.
Also, funnily enough, I can imagine the sirens destroying worlds better than Sky Eater. They seem to have some decent strategies. Though, I still don't know about post-industrial worlds; I think that, even after those get nuked to crap, there are still more humans alive than pre-industrial worlds, and they now have more incentive to not nuke themselves. It seems like it might be possible, but it doesn't seem like it'd be worth it. (I think it could be likened to hunting birds for meat vs hunting fully armed jets for the human inside.)
Kill him
So glad this updated, but please don't blast Sky Eater with rainbows... fimfiction needs it's dark as much as it needs it's light...
6133938 Side story:
Siren King or whatever (I haven't read this yet) is actually a massive meme-whore and at times, the most cringe inducing motherfucker ever but no-one can do shite cause he's so OP
Is the cover art Emerald sea serpent from Castle Age?
6499848 wut
6499843 And I can't wait to lay it on you guys. I'm going to enjoy this far more than I should...
6499848 K.
6499903 Zeus from... Great. Just great. I'm never getting that out of my head when I type his dialogue now. Thanks, Voyager. Thanks a lot.
6500308 Hah! One KNOWS he did his job when people like, hate, root for and root against his OC. Victory. And yes, family breakups are often a case of domestic disputes. I believe godhood is not immune to such things. As for the 'supposedly implied' things, I reread the chapter and could only find one thing that probably wouldn't be totally clear. What it the ending by chance?
Also, if you read Sky Eater's dialogue, choosing not to nuke themselves wouldn't really be a choice if the sirens were involved. The defense rests.
6500393 *Hyenas charge after Simba*
6501017 *sighs* Before this day, I'd never even heard of that. Then I googled it, and was all like, 'God. Dammit.' Well, Imma have to stick with it.
Craine...
6501169 Well that's not bad. I just happen to be a castle age player in facebook.
6501169
Eh, maybe. I mean, people can hate a Mary Sue. I guess it just matters if the hate was intended.
Now, for the 'supposedly implied' things, I remember there being at least two, but I couldn't find both after a quick skim through, just this one:
I'm not entirely sure what he was suggesting.
Also, I know the sirens might convince everyone to nuke themselves, but its possible some groups may mobilize themselves or submerge themselves to become immune to nukes, may require machines to agree to the nuking, may create more advanced laser defense systems, etc. For some groups, it may be as easy as convincing several military commanders to send the launch codes at once (which is still pretty hard), but for other groups, they might have to try hacking into computers, or convincing everyone to stop moving, or convincing everyone to turn off their defense systems, etc., and they might be in serious danger when it comes to machine defense systems.
I mean, yeah, it's possible. I just don't think its worth it when they could be convincing the pre-industrial world leaders to go to war repeatedly. There, they could just sit back and eat pop corn instead of frantically traveling all over the place to make sure automated systems didn't thwart their plans or kill them. (Unless they could somehow convince machines to do things from a distance, but that would just be ridiculous.)
6501405 Problem is Sky Eater is a Villain Stu God Mode character who relies on a thin premise of 'universal balance' which is as flimsy now as it was when Galactus was invented, and without the saving narrative grace of an Abraxas-like entity to at least explain why he's truly necessary to that universe.
This story seems to combine Galactus and Abraxas into one unlikable Villain Stu who, despite his supposedly enormous powers, is dependent on a small mirror portal and apparently incapable of opening one himself... which suggests that he's lying both about his power and purpose, and also indicates there are significant limitations to his abilities which could be utilized to trap him: i.e., bend the exit of the portal into a void universe and close it once he's there, trapping him presumably forever since he clearly lacks the ability to open his own interdimensional portals.
He exhibits overwhelmingly extreme megalomaniacal psychosis, furthered and fostered by his powers; and yet his entire philosophy amounts to nothing more than an archetypal "I am the Angel of Death, the time of purification is at hand" sort of delusion.
There is nothing interesting about him whatsoever. The least of the traditional comic book villains has had more going for them character-wise.
6501955
Hm. Well, I could tell you to withhold blatant expressions of hatred toward an unexplored character. I could tell you that I know exactly what a Gary Stu is, and that, despite my OC's power, doesn't fall in that category (as I've ensured). But explaining it in full detail would be a waste of your time and mine.
I will say this: explaining character backstory in bit-by-bit fashion is the best way to go, I think. I can't very well dump it all on everyone because I think it's necessary. Truth is, not only will that bore the piss out of folks, but it's just not my style. I say my OC's NOT a Stu simply for the following contradictions.
-Stus are hated/liked/known by EVERYONE. My OC is known by only a handful of characters, two of which knew very little.
-Stus can achieve their goals with absolutely NO hindrances or obstacles. My OC's goal is a lofty one, and between convincing his children that it's right and dealing with those that HAVE THE METHODS TO STOP HIM, it's certainly not easy for him.
-Stus are just there because their cool and everyone should want them in a story. My OC's there for something that ANYONE with a dad or children can at least consider: family. Tying into my beginning sentences, more reasons will be revealed as the story continues.
No, I'm not bashing your opinion (rude as it is). But I would've guessed that someone who's 'been around long enough' would know to wait for more revelations before viciously tearing into something they don't know or understand. But then, there are those who simply don't care for OC's and that's fine. Of course, there are also those who just bash for the sake of bashing, and I have ZERO tolerance for those people.
I don't even know if you liked/hated the story, or if you were just looking for an excuse to run your mouth. Either way, your comments are disconcerting.
Craine...
6500478 On that we can agree. Which is why I'm sure the ending of this story will speak to you the loudest.
6502694
Actually, I take back what I said earlier about the sirens not wanting to destroy post-industrial worlds; their father could have ordered it "because it builds character" or something.
Also, just having Twilight stand up to him and not just cower made him less of a Gary Stu, as it showed that he might be wrong. However, everywhere else, even with his confrontation with Celestia, he's been acting like one; he didn't seem to be having any problems with his battle, with dealing with his daughters, or with getting through the portal. Also, Stus are kind of vague.
But since you made a list, let's go into that... (Sorry about this. )
-So far, all of the major characters have known about Sky Eater, and they know of him as a legend. Most Stus aren't known by every character, they just immedietly get the reactions they want from the characters they focus on. And so far, save for Twilight standing up to him, it looked like he was getting all the reactions he wanted.
The plan is often the first casualty in war, so not only is "everything going according to plan" not fun, but it's also unrealistic. And while you may know that things aren't all going going according to plan, it does appear that way from my perspective as a reader. If you showed him nearly losing his cool, gritting his teeth, nearly falling asleep from boredom, or anything really, then he would seem more fallable.
-Actually no. Stus can have obstacles, they just run through them with zero effort, even if it takes them years. Again, it appears like your villain is doing just that, because all his ideas seem to be working perfectly.
-Also no. Stus can often come in as relatives to main or secondary characters (e.g. Luna and Celestia's long lost brother) Them being part of a family has nothing to do with their Gary Stu-ness.
Lastly, people rarely if ever 'just bash for the sake of bashing'. Bashing things takes effort and can often lead to negative social interactions that can be worse than having no interactions (e.g., banning or blocking). It's usually difference in personality/culture/upbringing/religion/etc. that causes someone to disagree or agree with something to varying degrees. Further, I believe you should only disregard someone's opinion if it's from a mindset that's completely incompatible with what they're talking about (e.g., a coal company's opinions on global warming.)
6503118 *inhales deeply*
No. I'm not gonna do it. I'm not gonna get into a Gary Stu dispute over a character that I actually don't care about. Especially after I've already made my case. People are gonna hate the guy, I'm fine with it. I'm just here to write.
6502694 The character is outrageously over-powered and god-tier. That automatically raises suspicions about the legitimacy.
Then, his justification is a tired cliché of universal balance that, were he so clever, he'd know was just flimsy excuse used by far too many evil god-tier villains to go on their bouts of wanton destruction. He'd think of something a bit more convincing than... not at all convincing... to someone possessing at least average rationality.
You're trying to convince readers that this guy is a hyper-powerful and ancient creature who ostensibly has a great amount of experience with making arguments for his case. Yet he's no more profound and existential than any one of countless fanfic villains who use EXACTLY THE SAME EXCUSE, to a tee.
I've seen this character too many times. The names change, but the personality and speech are identical from one to another. And they're all completely uninteresting whether they win or lose.
6508908 Then we'll leave that notion where it stands. It may be proven at the story's end. Don't care.
6503716
6510296
Wait a minute-- you don't care?
Sky Eater's practically a main character! You have to care about him if you want the readers to care about a good portion of your story.
6512213
You misunderstand me, Lust.
I care very much how my OC effects the story. I say I don't care about him, simply because he's had months to stew in my head to the point where I've 'killed my darling'. Used to be obsessed with the idea, but already knew better than to write something too soon after creation. If you can't tell, I take pride in my work, and writing a half-baked character with no planned character growth is not what I do.
Simply, as I said, I'm just done talking about it until everything is flushed out. Then I can see if I have succeeded or not.
6512742
Ah, got it.
I had to read up on that 'killed my darling' phrase though. I think you might be using it wrong: it's more about removing things that are precious to you from the story if they don't fit or if they're obscure. It's not about letting things stew in your head until you don't like them anymore, and then doing things you don't like. That just sounds unhealthy.
Actually, I think I 'killed my darling' once. I was planning on having a realistic fight in one of my fics, but my editors thought it was too dark, so I pretty much deleted the entire chapter. (I saved it though, because I think it's still good, just not for the story as a whole.) There are still many elements I keep in that story that are precious to me as I write them, but they only stay in if they help the story as a whole.
I wonder who would win in a fight between Sky Eater and:
i1007.photobucket.com/albums/af200/unicrons1and2/unicronbig/unicron.jpg
Or even:
vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/teentitans/images/f/f8/RageTrigonNevermore.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20081012035127