Celestia groaned as her last meeting before lunch finally let out. She was tired, sore, but above all else, sweating bullets in the midsummer’s heat. I know the Summer Sun Celebration is soon, but this just isn’t right. She stomped down with her hooves and let out a muffled scream into the pillow on her throne.
“Excuse me princess.”
She looked down at her secretary Kibitz and sighed. The biege unicorn was one of the few ponies who knew of her frustrations, even if he cared so little for them. Whether it was exhaustion or her wounds, he always made sure she kept to her schedule. But surely this is relatable enough for him to give me a break, right? SHe looked down at him and mustered her best sigh. “It’s simply too warm today. If I go on I will collapse.”
Kibitz sighed internally and shook his head. “You simply need some water in you. We can break for lunch and you may have some juice or something if you truly need something relaxing. However, you are not allowed to shirk your duties, especially with the town committee of Ponyville being here specifically for you later today.”
She lowered her head, but then nodded. She had her duties, and that was that. The word juice stuck in her head though, and soon her horn was aglow as she called her second newest tenant.
Kibitz nearly had a heart attack when the disembodied head of a unicorn was on the dining table that they normally adjourned to. He then scowled and stomped a hoof. “I thought the cleaning staff knew better than to leave death threats just lying around. My apologies princess. I’ll see to it personally that it is removed with expert efficiency.”
“But I like it here. Do I really need to go?”
He stared at the head for a few moments longer before falling over to his side, out cold. Celestia stepped forward and giggled. “Don’t worry, he’ll be fine. However, I demand popsicles. My plan was that you would–”
“Take shortish sticks, stick them into juice, and freeze them, right?”
Celestia blinked a few times. “It sounds like you’ve done this before.”
Twilight rubbed her forehooves together as she smiled wide. “I might have been the reason we were out of juice a few days ago.”
She smirked at the apparition. “Did you at least put it to good use?”
Twilight nodded vigorously as she brought a popsicle over to Celestia. “Bon Appetite!”
Celestia smiled and put the tip into her mouth, her tongue slowly moving along one inch of it before her eyes twitched. She spat it back out and gently put it onto a napkin on the table. “I’m sorry Twilight, but I absolutely despise grape flavored things.”
“Oh, I’m so–”
“How dare you! I demand for you to eat me before I, the great Poslicel, will force you to!”
Both of the mares simply stared at it. “You will give Poslicel the the same honor his brethren were given upon birth, or else, Poslicel will have to start altering the very fabric of the universe. He can make the air colder, skin freeze, and, if he absolutely must, he will use the forbidden technique of changing forms!”
Celestia merely started laughing as Twilight’s eyes widened. “Please, don’t! We’ll take your demands. Celestia, please, devour him so he may be appeased.”
A white hoof came across Celestia’s face as she shook her head. “I demand proof of his almighty powers first then. Do something truly fantastical, and I will devour you.”
The popsicle harumphed. “You dare question the great Poslicel’s power? You will lose your mind as I give you your idiotic ‘proof’.” The purple popsicle began to glow and levitate, the dark aura of Twilight’s magic gathering around it. Slowly, the purple became black and a wicked laugh filled the room. “Here it comes! Hold onto your seats as the great Poslicel changes flavors!”
The popsicle dropped to the table and the aura faded away, revealing a now orange popsicle. “Now, are you afraid yet?”
Celestia levitated it into the air and gave him a lick. “Oh, yes, I truly am terri-mmm-fied. Please, I can’t take you sweet, sweet, orangey goodness.”
And so, slowly, Celestia endured as she continued her war against the orange creamsicle popsicle. Each lick tested her resilience, and slowly, Twilight lost her own control as she started to giggle. But in the end she succeeded, and she placed the remains of her favorite flavor of popsicle on the table.
... Popsticle vilians ....
second!, darn!
also great job!, this fic is promising to be one of my top favorites! yay!
5920920 Too late, sorry.
I knew this was coming when I read that comment.
It needed to happen. The law of "This makes my sides hurt from laughing so do it" conquers all.
liked for the cover, will read later
OK now I have to see this ides become real. Twi, a pan-dimensional feline, a eldrich horror, and a former god or goddess are playing a game of poker and Tia and Sunset walks in to the room with no idea about the game or what they use for the bets.
5921176 So, Twaith, Cthulu, and Beerus from DBZ?
you should have some random pony try to exorcise twaith withouth Celestias consent. only to fail spectacularly
5919781
Hey! Your that dude that was commenting on every chapter of Fallout: Equestria.
Aye, it's my brother again!
I'm so proud.
Grape ones are the evilest, and cherry-flavored ones are jealous since their own evil machinations pale in comparison.
5913187
I support this idea.
The crowd sat shocked at this year's production of the Hearth's Warming pageant. The actors seemed average enough, although the windigoes seemed particularly well done. The howls they let out chilled their very souls, exciting even the most snob-nosed thespian. What truly clinched the production, so real they could FEEL the very bite of winter's fury at every scene of ice and snow was the climax.
As Princess Platinum, Counselor Puddinghead, and Commander Hurricane slowly froze into blocks of ice mid-argument through rather impressive stage effects, the storm culminated, blowing out quite real snowflakes over the shocked (and shivering) ponies in attendance. Frost etched over seats, crawling with a feeling of foreboding doom, only to be washed away with the rest of the foul weather as the fiery heart of friendship made its appearance.
All at once the biting cold of the winter vanished before a wash of summery warmth and heat, leaving all the more powerful an impact as ponies instinctively relaxed before the warmth. The closing narration and curtain call was met with absolute silence; the audience was still recovering.
There was only one real way they could respond, after their senses collectively recovered...
They cheered. They cheered and the thunder of their applause actually caused the theater to shake. Sunset Shimmer and Twilight Sparkle looked to one another from the catwalks above the play, grinning like cheshire cats.
5921195
Don't forget the cat and was thinking more of one from Greek, Roman, or Norse pantheon.
Oh and in line with my other suggestions featuring silly / zany:
"I AM THE BOX GHOOOOOST!"
"Ugh, this is the FIFTH--"
"Sixth."
"--SIXTH time you've said that! Will you PLEASE get out of the library?!"
"NEVER! For in this 'LIBRARY' of which you speak, are the forgotten and eldritch possessions of..." The faint blue, red-eyed pony wearing a toboggan phased out for a moment, the floating box beside him turning to face so the label was displayed. "OF SUNNY DALE PUBLIC FOAL HOSPITAL! .... OK maybe a different box."
"This is getting rediculous. Why do you even want books, when you won't even read them?!"
"I am not interested in your WORTHLESS WOOD-PULP! I desire the AWESOME and FEARSOMENESS that is the BOXES which CONTAIN THEM!"
"...."
"I AM THE BOX GHO-- Why are you two looking at me like that?"
Celestia found herself staring in utter consternation outside the library hallway, an odd, portly ghost dashing through the door, followed by Twilight Sparkle, radiating a cold that even she found surprising, and Sunset Shimmer whose tailtip appeared to be on fire.
"Is it Tuesday?"
5921334 I am so confused. What is the context to all of this?
5921377
I... take it you've never seen that show.
Alright. It's an old-ish cartoon named Danny Phantom. One of the recurring throwaway joke characters was named the Box Ghost.
5921407 Okay, first off, DON'T YOU DARE ACT LIKE I DO NOT KNOW OF THE AWESOMENESS THAT IS THE BOX GHOST! Secondly, you saying he wore a toboggan I think is what threw me. Third thing is that it just came out of nowhere, unlike the other ones that were bounced from a comment.
5921442 The Box Ghost is awesome!
5921442 I had a reason but I forgot it.
5921334
5921442 DO THIS AUTHOR!
Also, I have an idea of my own: Kamina pony look-alike with a Simon-like pony plushie and a Yoko-esque pegasus trying to banish Twaith. They fail several times and become her friends in the end, though.
5921659 Okay, this one does fly over my head as far as the reference goes, as all that is possibly coming to mind is XXXHolic by Klamp, and that is only because of Yoko. Also, I should make a note about crossover material.
5921766
reactiongifs.com/r/2013/03/agape.gif
You- you-.... YOU DON'T KNOW THE EPICNESS THAT IS TENGEN TOPPA GURREN LAGANN?!?!?!
5921790 Ah, never cared enough to watch.
5921795 scan.lusu.co.uk/files/2015/04/2.gif
Just go watch it. You won't be disappionted.
So cute!
The D'aws... they're too... powerful...
*gasps for air*
Must... not...
D'awwwwwww!!!!
Noooooo! The D'aws are attacking! Quick! To the bookfort!
I really don't like Celestia in this story. In the first chapter she starts justifying her decision to go straight to fighting the resident wraith because they supposedly will inevitably go corrupt and evil, but when they find Twilight she responds to being politely asked to leave by attempting to impale her, without any discussion or consideration of the circumstances. Then she "has" to take away most of Twilight's magic and ability to grow, probably without any real idea of what possible side effects that could have, in order to leave her alone.
But apparently that wasn't enough, because after deciding that they shouldn't research wraiths through dark books because it would only give them bad impressions of Twilight, she wants Twilight to take a charm that she probably can't remove herself in order to travel freely in the light, and it is explicitly stated that she can remove it at any time to make the light's effect cripplingly painful instead.
Now, here she is demanding something from Twilight when she sees her when she could just ask politely, like most non-jerkish people would do. I get that it's supposed to be playful in that scene, but with the context of her past interactions with Twilight I just can't take it that way. This take on Celestia is pushing all the wrong buttons with me, and I hate the casually insensitive way that she treats Twilight, like her feelings and actual behavior are an afterthought to Celestia.
5923207 ...are we reading the same story? So far, it just seems like the comedic misadventures of a filly wraith, a frustrated student, and the Princess. I think you might be reading too far into things.
this chapter brought such a smile to my face
5923549 Comedic, yes, but it's the little things about the way that Celestia acts that ticks me off. They can say a lot about a person and what they think of others, and her attitude towards Twilight both here and when they first met is somewhat entitled and inconsiderate to Twilight.
5924252 Except what is Twilight? She is a being that should have enough power to possibly wipe Canterlot, or even Equestria, off the face of the map. Simply because she claims to be good and not dangerous, precautions must be taken towards something that, by all rights, is a monster. And hey, she still trusted Twilight enough to try to extend friendship and companionship to her by way of Spike, so there isn't only maliciousness and mistrust.
Also, one, she doesn't impale Twaith. She sends a beam of sunlight into the bookfort, illuminating it and drawing her out. Next, she causes Twaith to take a cut in power because of reasons stated above, and because she is so powerful passively that she is freezing water pipes a couple hundred feet above her head. She can't have that happening. Without that power cut, ponies couldn't ever stay comfortably near her. My final point is on the sun immunity. It allows Twilight to freely interact with who she wants, when she wants. To simply have the amendment of "You get caught killing, murdering, or harming others, I can fry you" is actually pretty generous and trusting of Celestia. I understand differences in opinions, but I would think the good, the clearly stated goos, that Celestia gives upon Twilight for these would paint her precautions in a good light.
Awesome.
5924550
That depends entirely on how you define a monster. If you judge simply based on what someone could do if they wanted, then the world is full of monsters, Celestia included. Wasn't the original reason Celestia said they had to fight because wraiths are supposed to be corrupt? But Twilight was not hostile at all to them from the start. The precautions she took later are one thing, but her cavalier attitude in approaching and handling Twilight are completely unnecessary.
Using the sunlight to draw out Twilight may have been what ended up happening but it wasn't what Celestia attempted. The wording of the paragraph where she floods the book fort with light is a bit awkward, but it does say that Celestia expected a wraith of Twilight's power to be seriously injured by light and not merely sensitive to it, and specifically says that she is surprised that they weren't impaled yet. That could have referred to either her and Sunset, or Twilight who she couldn't confirm the gender of yet. However, given that impalement tends to be lethal, I doubt she would deliberately put Sunset into a situation where that is a likely possibility without at the very least giving her a heads-up.
Most of the other actions in and of themselves I am fine with, especially her reaching out to Twilight with Spike's egg. I would be okay with the light charm thing except for the "human element" - the chance that there could be a mistake or misunderstanding that leads to trouble, which could be resolved easily but could also end up with people making it worse with unnecessary strife. There's also Celestia's tendency towards assumptions and quick decisions without keeping others informed that often leads to unnecessary complications/antagonism. Basically, it's not so much what she's doing as how she goes about accomplishing it that upsets me.
She has got to see some of her long lost familial ties.
5921195 I so want see that happen. Especially when the guests introduce them selves. Though I don't think Beerus goes anywhere without that friend/teacher of his, though their interaction with Celestia would be funny too.
What would happen if Twilight was actually winning by a massive margin? Just add some extra humour to it.
5921276
Better, it backfires and she and Twilight switch mortality (and lack thereof) for a day.
5930883
Perhaps, but in some books and games there are live dragons that have ice breathe. While I have no direct counter for the Darkness alignment, Consider what Celestia noted in an earlier chapter, that being that Wraiths were known to eventually become interested in Necromancy, and that no one previously had (obviously) succeeded in hatching Spike. Twilight might have been the only one in Canterlot that could hatch him, if he had already been dead. Now, I know that it made no mention of her actually trying that type of magic, but until the author comments directly to say otherwise, I prefer to stick to my theory.
This story is a thing of great beauty. Keep up the good work.
Oh god, that comment was gold. FrozenStick is my new favorite villain. :P
POSLICEL MUST RETURN!
...Wow. I can't stand the grape flavour either.
6760516
Nothing is grape flavor, really. Its all straight-up purple.
Kind of like how most fruit flavored chewing gums just taste orange. And I don't mean like the fruit named after the color, either.
A-ahem!. . . I love grape!
*dodges spells, tables, and chairs*
5921276 "The power of Celestia compels you!"
"Well, duh."
"... What?"
Is this ImKibitz?
5931165
Unless she didn’t mean to. The necromancy was an accident. Never cast any before, or thought about it
6834730
Technically the fruit is named after the trees and the color is named after the fruit.