Very nice! The picture is what drew me in

Aside from some misplaced commas, I didn't really see any other mistakes.

Nice fic. It seems the longer I procrastinate, the better the submissions get. Dang, this is gonna be tough to top. I need to get started, but I'm soooo lazy. Best of luck to you, I hope you win if I don't (99% positive I won't even place).

Sorry guys, the mods pulled down the story temporarily because there were a few parts that they didn't like. I went back and fixed them so it should be all good now :) Again, sorry about that.

I saw this was unfinished, I'll come for more. Good job!

5863647 Even though the mods may have pulled the story, I still have it in my internet history!

*clasps hands together evily* MWAHAHAHAHAH!!!

Yay! It's back. Now I can re-read it.

Edit: Nope, just a link in my notification list. Still not searchable

5865510 It is? o.O You can get to it without having a direct link? To me it still says its under moderation

5865517

Nope, sorry, I got overly excited.I thought it was, but then I realised I clicked a link in my notifications and was editing my response when you replied

Story is now up and visible again! Sorry for the inconvenience, guys!

Really loved it (OctyScratch is my personal favorite, even just a little bit of it) and looking for forward for part two.

"Ahhhn! Oh goodness, do that harder! Mmmphh!"

Oh my...

"Nope." She turned and walked back out instantly, making sure the door shut quietly so they wouldn't hear.

MY SIDES!

SO AWESOME! MUST-HAVE-MOAR!!!!

It was a good thing she decided to wear a tee shirt over her bikini top or else she'd be freezing. Even though it was cold, the walk along the beach was still somewhat relaxing.

Did she remove the shirt?

"Oh. Right... Damn, it's freaking huge..."

(Don’t make a sex joke... don’t make a sex joke... don’t make a sex joke...)