• Published 16th Feb 2015
  • 3,720 Views, 91 Comments

I Don't Think I'm Supposed to be Here - Architect Ironturtle



What happens when the Merchant screws up a displacement?

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The Fallout of Your Mistakes

Disaster reports were swamping Celestia by the time the Elements had made it back to the castle. The complete removal of all sound and magic nationwide (thankfully not worldwide) had caused untold amounts of damage, to the point that she could barely keep it all straight. The pegasi had gotten hit the hardest, with their cloud homes destroyed and countless injuries and deaths from falling during the 7 seconds the world went quiet. The unicorns were right behind them, as their greater connection to magic made it hurt them that much more deeply than their less attuned counterparts. This left the earth ponies, who were only afflicted by a temporary loss of strength, one which passed quickly and did no lasting damage unless they were using it at the time of the attack.

Cloudsdale has dispersed almost completely, annihilating the weather production factories and the homes of over 10,000 pegasi. Foals's cribs had crumbled out from under them, sending them hurtling into a free-fall they couldn't recover from. Most were rescued by their parents, but only most.

The cloud city wasn't the only one hard by the catastrophe, though. Manehattan had screeched to a halt for the first time in living memory, and Canterlot limped along on the few earth ponies and pegasi in administrative positions as all the unicorns had gone home on sick leave.

Celestia was busily writing a decree to ration all remaining weather until they could rebuild one of the factories when Twilight burst into the throne room. "Princess, are you all right!?"

Celestia activated smile #3, which meant, "I'm tired, but still glad to see you," and walked down to meet her students nuzzle. "I'm fine Twilight, but are you all right? And where's your crown?"

"My crown? MY CROWN! IT'S GONE!" Twilight sniffled, tears building up in her eyes, "Why didn't anypony tell me!?"

Her friends all whistled as the they looked out the windows, getting a frown from Celestia before she put on smile #4, the matron, and said, "How about you tell me everything." Her gaze hardened slightly as she added, "And I do mean everything."

One quick recap later Celestia was looking a lot paler than usual. "This creature is nothing like the one I faced," she said finally, "That is for certain. The ability to cancel the Elements of Harmony is something I never dreamed possible, and for it to leave you alive is even more unusual. But my ponies, are you sure it took your crown?"

"Pretty sure, Princess," said AJ, "Why d'you ask?"

"Because the Elements are linked: if I have one, I can find the others. Just give me a moment, and we'll stop this monster before he strikes again." Celestia levitated there Elements to her, and focused her magic into them. After a few seconds of pretty lights, her eyes shot open, glowing white for a moment before they returned to normal. She wasn't smiling anymore, and Twilight could have swore that she looked... worried? "Follow me." The Mane Six fell into step behind her. "He's under the city, heading into the mountain. I shudder to think what he could do to the leystones if he gets his hands on one."

"Um, Princess?" asked Rarity, "What are leystones?"

"Well," Twilight replied, "You know how leylines are magical conduits running under the surface of the world?" When Rarity nodded she continued, "Leystones are the focus points of the that magic. They-I think organize it would be the best term."

"And what would happen if one these things got removed?" asked AJ.

Twilight opened her mouth to reply, then stiffened up, several hairs spontaneously springing out of place. "Um, Princess, could we please, please, maybe, just possibly, move a little faster?"

88888888

"Ok, this is a bit bigger than I was expecting."

I'd finally made it down all the way to the Radiant shard, and instead of a stone about the size of my head, I'd found a piece that was twice as tall as I was, and extended deep enough into the bedrock that I couldn't see how big it actually was. It was going to be a royal pain to remove it. I was still holding the small piece of Direstone I had brought with me, which kept me more or less immune to the corruptive influence of such a large chunk of Radiant. Even then, I could feel the impulse to go turn myself in to the Princess, repent of my actions, and join her followers in their happy little lives: right after I crushed the Direstone I was holding. Ugh. Just thinking about surrendering made me want to hurl, and meatballs (my last meal) never tasted as good coming up as they did going down.

Instead, I turned my focus to how I could get this thing out of here without bringing down the whole mountain. One of the earth elementals would probably be best for the task, like Tiny or Earth Shaker. Maybe Morphling, a water elemental, could drill away the surrounding rock or- or I could just break it into pieces small enough to remove. With that course of action settled on, I cast Elder Titan's Earth Splitter, which cracked the entire cavern in front of me in half, but left the Radiant itself untouched. It turned out it wasn't as big as I had feared, but I still had no chance of shoving that thing in my satchel.

As I went over my options for carrying it out of here, I realized I should have prepped my items a long time ago. After I got done headbutting the wall as a reminder to not be such an idiot, I decided on Boots of Travel for speed, a Butterfly for combat, a Heart of Terrasque for durability, a Shiva's Guard for spell casting, an Aghanim's Scepter for its ultimate boosts, and an Orchid Malevolence for the silence that seems to have become the most powerful weapon in my arsenal.

With that done I used Rubick's Telekinesis to move the Radiant shard out of the wall and into the cavern proper. I was tapping on the walls trying to find the fastest way back to the surface when I was rudely interrupted by one angry ruler and six even angrier Element bearers. Showtime.

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Celestia and the Element Bearers were right on top of Massacre when they felt the ground tremble and heard a massive crack echo down the cave tunnels. A loose crystal fell to the floor and shattered behind them, causing Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash to jump and let out high pitched squeaks.

"Oh, no..." whispered Celestia. None of the others commented, since they could all feel it. The ambient magic was going haywire, spiking and dropping at random intervals like the waves on a stormy sea. The group shifted from a fast walk to a canter.

"That bucking idiot... does it have any idea what it's done!?" shouted Rainbow.

"Nope, not a clue." replied Pinkie smugly.

Rainbow facehoofed, "That was a rhetorical question Pinkie."

"A what?"

"...Nevermind."

Then they found it. It had its back to them, paws rubbing against the cavern walls, with an enormous Leystone hovering in the air in the center of the cavern. Massacre wheeled around the moment their hoofsteps reached its ears, and one of its weird paws dropped to its saddlebag.

"Take this, you featherbrain!" shouted Rainbow Dash, wings flared for maximum thrust.

"Rainbow, wait!" cried Twilight.

As fast as RD was, Massacre was a blur. In an instant he had pulled out a white staff with a glowing red orb set in one twisted tip. "Silence!" it shouted, and Rainbow dropped out of the air like she'd been clubbed over the head before tumbling to the ground. Her momentum carried her into the opposite wall once Massacre stepped out of the way. It let out a sigh of relief at her failure, then addressed the rest of the group in a deep, if nasal, obviously masculine voice. "Any other bright ideas?"

Sarcasm, the creature had used sarcasm. That was a couple of steps above mindless, in Twilight's opinion. Maybe it could be reasoned with? "Massacre," she said carefully, "put the stone back, and maybe we can talk this out." Her friends stared at her in shock.

The monster... smiled. "Ah, Twilight Sparkle. Still trying to make friends," it snorted, "even in circumstances like these. Unfortunately, I can't do what you request." He sidestepped a sneak attack by Rainbow, letting her careen into another wall. "This," he gestured to the stones behind, "is Radiant Ore, an ancient consciousness with two goals. It wants to spread its influence and destroy its opposite. And it's not above enslaving any sapient race it comes across to achieve those goals. Like so."

With that he opened his paw and held up an orange crystal. Immediately, Twilight was struck by an overwhelming urge to shatter that crystal and its holder along with it. She'd taken two steps forward before he concealed it again, and the desire vanished, leaving her gasping like she'd just had a bucket of liquid nitrogen tossed in her face. "The Radiant and Dire are a stain on any world they inhabit, and as the only who understands their threat, it's up to me to purge their influence." He struck a pose as he said this, somehow managing to dodge yet another attack from Rainbow simultanously.

"And what of the lives you destroy in the process?" retorted Celestia, who Twilight could tell was shaken, but only because she knew her so well. "Like those you killed in ancient times?"

"I have no memory of anything I've done up until this very afternoon, and I was not in control of my actions during that time either." He pointed at Applejack, "You're walking lie detector can confirm this."

Everyone turned to stare at Applejack. She looked down, "He's telling the truth," she muttered angrily.

"And what about when you leveled Cloudsdale?" asked Celestia. "Was that beyond your control as well?"

"HE DID WHAT!!??!?"

"Huh?" he said cleverly, seemingly caught off guard.

"When you stopped all magic for a few seconds." growled Celestia.

"Oh. OH. Oh." Massacre sat down, hard, his eyes staring straight ahead yet seeing nothing. Rainbow slammed into him full force this time, but he didn't seem to notice. She continued to whale on him with multiple hoof strikes, but he still didn't react. Then slowly, he looked up at them sheepishly. "Oops?"

Rainbow exploded. "OOPS!? YOU DESTROY MY HOME AND HURT MY FAMILY AND ALL YOU CAN SAY IS OOPS!?!?!?"

"Rainbow's right!" stated Fluttershy. "You're nothing but a big meanie!"

"Girls, please!" chided Twilight. "You have to put the leystone back Massacre. it's the only thing keeping the magic here from going haywire! Can't you feel it?"

"Magic? MAGIC!?" He snarled, "The only stuff I'm feeling is Radiant corruption! And if you say these shards are the only thing keeping it in check," he looped a flaming rope around the stone, "Then maybe it was never magic in the first place."

"STOP HIM!" bellowed Celestia.

"Chronosphere!"

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One moment Massacre was standing in front of them, the next he was gone, and the leystone along with him. They felt the magic surge one last time, then dissipate entirely. Celestia screamed in frustration and slammed her hoof into the wall, cracking it all the way to the ceiling. When she turned back around, the Mane Six were staring at her, their ears pinned against their heads. "What is it, my little ponies?"

"You've got something on your, uh," Rainbow Dash gestured to her front right shoulder. Celestia twisted around to look. It was a message, written in some kind of dust.

Massacre is a stupid nickname. I am Carl Roberts, and you should address me as such.

Celestia's eyes narrowed in rage, and she almost screamed again, but Twilight interrupted her by saying, "Uh, girls? What happened to your elements?"

This time Celestia really did scream.

Author's Note:

8/25/2017: mostly minor edits here, including stripping out the links and removing Carl's alias of Dual. It wasn't really meant for him anyway.

Dun, dun, duuuuun. That's chapter 3, edit one. Let me know in the comments if I forgot something or didn't do a character right, or if the music doesn't match. Like and favorite, everypony.