The pair in the Pisces room opted to lie on their respective beds as they talked, waiting for their leader's return to tell them whether all was well or that it was time to flee the city. They'd gone through a number of topics as they waited.
"...And that's pretty much how I learned I could walk on clouds."
"Wow! I saw a spell for that, but it looked even harder than the super springy spell you'd need to jump up that high!"
"So unicorns can do it too? Figures."
Sonata smiled mischievously. "We should like, both get on a cloud to hide from Dagi, just to see what she does!"
Aria snickered at the thought. "Probably storm around with that, 'when I find those idiots,' look on her face, or yell for us to come out." The smile slipped away. "Or, if she spots us, find a way to take down the cloud."
Sonata's eyes widened. "Can you do that?"
"Most likely. I pushed one around just yesterday, so if there's a way to shoot down clouds and she needs one to fall, she'll probably be the first to find it. And if we hopped to another one, you just know she'd keep at it until she'd grounded every cloud in the sky."
"Haha, yea... Scary."
Aria found herself smiling almost hopefully. "But, that scary, I'll-get-what-I-want-no-matter-what-ness she has is usually on our side, right?"
Sonata looked like she was thinking hard. "I... I guess so?" She grinned. "Hey, yea! It's way less scary when you think of it that way!" After a short silence, Sonata frowned again. "Ria? Why don't we get along this well when Dagi's around?"
Feeling a small pang of shame, Aria turned away, shrugging dismissively. "You know why. It's just how we are, how we've kinda always been. What would Adagio say if she noticed we weren't in each other's hair all the time?" It was for roughly the same reason that Aria still forced herself to try to poke holes in Adagio's plans and disagree with her whenever possible; she was too smart not to notice if that stopped altogether.
Now it was Sonata that offered a hopeful smile. "That we're best buddies and she doesn't have to worry about us getting on her nerves anymore?"
Aria was less optimistic. "Or that it must mean we're plotting against her and she'll have to do something nasty to 'keep us in line'?"
The grin gave way to an angry pout. "Why do you have to be such a downer all the time?!"
Aria scowled in reply. "Why do you have to be so brainless?!"
"Oh yea? Well you're a bird-brain!"
"That doesn't even make sense."
"Does too! Bird-pony, bird-brain!" She concluded by blowing raspberries, the two of them glaring at each other when she was finished. They held the stares for several seconds before each of them started to smile, quiet giggles following. "You really are kind of a downer sometimes," said Sonata with a perfectly straight face.
"Hey," Aria huffed, "I'm just realistic. It pays to remember that stuff doesn't always go smooth. In fact, I was thinking that if Adagio doesn't get back by later tonight, that'll be our cue to high-tail it outta here." She glanced at the door to the balcony. "Got it all planned out; I'd slip out the door, fly straight up, and use the cloud cover to get as far from here as possible."
Sonata frowned, looking hurt. "What about me?"
"Springy jump and cloud-walking spells, remember?" She'd have felt bad about having no plan whatsoever for Adagio's escape, but she knew their leader. If Adagio didn't come back at all, she wasn't in trouble, she was dead.
"Or you could carry me."
She raised a doubting eyebrow. "I'm not saying you're fat, but..."
Blue cheeks tinted red as Sonata's face scrunched up. "I mean once I use a feather spell!"
Now the brow was raised in ordinary curiosity. "Feather spell?"
Her irritation forgotten, Sonata smiled. "It's a spell that makes whatever you cast it on really light, good for moving companies and ponies weighed down with too much stuff to get heavy things from one place to another with minimal ex, e-egg, uh... Hang on." She picked up the spellbook, flipping through to find the right page. "Aha! With minimal exertion!" She continued with her nose in the book, reading off the description like a student called on in class. "A less sensible pony might first think of a spell to enhance one's physical strength, but with this comes the difficulty of adapting to one's new-found might in short, irregular terms. Example: A pony employing the feather spell runs no enhanced risk of tearing a door off it's hinges." She looked up at Aria with a smile, as though expecting to be congratulated.
"Pfft, nerd."
Sonata scowled. "Bite me!"
---
"If I'm to be of any use to you three, I'll need to know what you're planning. What can you tell me without jeopardizing your efforts up to this point?"
Adagio sat with her forehooves crossed, looking across the table in the dim little chamber as though she expected Blueblood to pull his face off to reveal Princess Twilight, playing an insanely elaborate joke on her. "That depends, who else knows we're here tonight?"
"Well, Kibitz and whomever he may have informed as to my whereabouts, but I've not shared a breath of my observations of you three and I alone wish to aid in your efforts... Once I know what they are, mind you."
She was just slightly incredulous. "You must see how this sounds. How could you think I'd trust you with my plans?"
He smiled, not in what she now realized had been a business smile akin to her own when she wanted somepony to do something, but an earnest grin. "I could have simply reported my suspicions to the guards, or any of the princesses, could I not? I could have had the three of you put in chains and interrogated, could have simply asked you to leave (probably with guards behind me, to make the point) if I weren't interested in what you had to offer. I didn't, because I am."
"Why? What do you think we are?"
"I'm glad you asked! I think you're part of a pattern, a recurring theme we have here in Equestria. I don't know if things are different in other parts of the world, I'm never there long enough to see it through, but here, we seem to have something of a knack for bringing in disaster."
The headlines seen in the library flashed through her memory. "Yes, and?"
"And you, your group, have a certain..." He waved a hoof uncertainly, searching for the right word, "Well, let me put it this way: do you play cards at all?" She shook her head. "Drat, this is the only example that comes to mind. There are games that are often used to gamble as much as to pass the time, and in it the players bluff and lie to each other about their standing as the game goes on."
Adagio smirked a little. "That I'm familiar with."
He nodded once. "Then you understand when I say after a while, one may learn to spot the tells? I've seen ponies like you before, Miss Dazzle, and-" he glanced away, muttering under his breath, "well, not all of them were 'ponies', per se, but that's beside the point, -and trust me when I say I've noticed a few things. Your initial story about being actresses was viable, you all have the looks for it, but 'we're rehearsing for a play' is perhaps the oldest go-to excuse for strange behavior in the book. That I never heard about you three performing such scenes again or asking where you might be able to find employment akin to what you were familiar with in Canterlot was nothing if not a red flag."
She nodded a little, as though making note of it for later.
"When most ponies are invited to Castle Canterlot, they react like tourists." He adapted a face of faux-astonishment in what Adagio guessed was imitation. "'Oh, what nice tapestries,' 'those windows have such outstanding craftsmanship,' 'everything is just so amazing!'" His expression became a tired deadpan. "That kind of thing. That I didn't hear a word to that effect for once was gratifying, but also a hint."
Adagio rolled her eyes at this. Rarely would an act be worth debasing herself with that kind of sycophancy. Or fake fascination with interior decorating.
"I've also noticed that the three of you eat very little during breakfast and dinner. Shortly after the first time we met, I recall you drinking maybe two cups of tea and eating a single sandwich."
The look on her face suggested Adagio was utterly lost. "What's wrong with that?"
Blueblood was similarly confused. "I... I think it would mean, for normal ponies, that they would be very hungry? Or filled their stomachs when nopony was looking, but I couldn't guess why one mi-" he stopped, feeling he was initiating a hoof-in-mouth moment in line with what he'd said to Aria at the Mauvaise Fracture, "-I mean, nothing, nothing outstanding." She looked back at him curiously, but before things could get awkward, he moved to the next point of suspicion. "And then there were my outings with the other two."
Adagio facehoofed, groaning.
"You don't seem terribly surprised."
She sighed. "Honestly? No, but I needed them to gather information on you for maximum effectiveness."
"In what, pray tell?"
To hell with it, no sense in lying right now.
She answered entirely in a tired deadpan. "Getting inside your head, figuring out how best to behave to turn you into my eager, mindless servant with wiles and wit alone."
Blueblood chuckled. "Would you believe something like that has already been attempted? Not with ordinary charm, mind you, but full-fledged mind-control? It worked fine, until the target's sister showed up poking holes in the trickster's performance."
Adagio was not amused. "Ah, well, thank you for the warning." It was odd just how calm she felt, knowing the pony across the table could likely have her and the others locked away forever with little more than a word, if he wished.
He only smiled back. "You see? This is one of the ways I can help, I know what's been tested in the last, ohh, year or so?"
"All of that really did happen in the span of one year?!"
He blinked, confused. "I'm sorry, all of what?"
He's not a mind-reader, then. Good, good.
She cleared her throat. "I was doing a bit of research at the library. Twice, actually. What I came across in terms of recent events, I first dismissed as the work of utter lunatics." She shrugged. "In hindsight, I suppose my own experience lends credence to the stories of 'Twilight Sparkle vs. the forces of evil.'" Blueblood's head tilted searchingly, though he didn't actually ask. Adagio took a deep breath. Telling him anything at all was a gamble, but so was trying to back out now. "Before I share any further, you are aware that of those two categories, my group is not on the Twilight Sparkle side of things?"
He nodded. "We can't all be the 'Princess of Friendship.' Does that mean you'll accept my offer?"
Still not at all comfortable with the way this was turning out, she and her cohorts essentially at the mercy of another, but relieved their being discovered at least seemed to be going well, her reply was barely over a whisper. "I'll need you not to ask too many questions, to trust that we'll keep you informed when it's strictly necessary. Alright?"
His expression suggested a hint of disappointment, but he nodded. "Very well, but please let me know how I may be of assistance. And, forgive me if this is overly presumptuous, but you're the brains of the outfit, aren't you?" He knew it was possible that Sonata's ditzy persona was all an act and that she was secretly the one in charge, but he wanted to hear it from one of them first.
She nodded slowly, though the answer had felt abundantly obvious.
"Good, good, just double-checking. If it's at all possible, I'd be more than happy to covertly assist in your plans during our outings, or even in the day-job. Careful allocation of funding under the right bureaucratic label might raise more eyebrows if not for all the legal jargon one would need to know to understand the effects. I can think of some things that can be done cheaper at no cost to anything more than somepony's vanity, if bits are needed."
Adagio felt she'd earned a question herself, even if a dangerous one. "Why are you so eager to help us?"
This seemed to give him pause for thought as he carefully picked an answer. "I suppose it's a matter of principle."
"Do tell?"
He looked at her very seriously. "I've lived in the palace for the better part of my life, Miss Dazzle, and in that time I've had the privilege of going out to see places of considerably poorer standing, to witness more of the world in the span of a few years than most will their entire lives. The most common sight of all? Problems. Everyone, every member of every species, without exception, has something that stands between them and blissful happiness. However, looking at any given member of any population, I see more faces smiling and carrying on with their short, little lives as though all was well and always will be. The same faces that lived to see their world threatened with terrifying frequency."
He wasn't so into his speech that he stopped looking across the table to see whether or not she was still paying attention, but Adagio knew a villainous rant when she heard one. From the sounds of things, he'd been building this one up for a while. Perhaps she could use this...
"I've pointed this out, to quite a few supposedly sapient lifeforms, and the most common responses? Indifference, or even ignorance! Even if they know that Nightmare Moon could have plunged the world into eternal darkness, that threats from millenia ago could resurface to wreak havoc at any time, that the Spirit of Chaos was set free on a hunch that he could be tamed, they don't care! And for the record? That last one backfired predictably. He's supposedly come around for real this time thanks to the usual suspects, and as before? Nopony cares."
Spirit of Chaos? He couldn't mean-
He went on, cutting her thoughts short with exasperated hoof gestures. "I've watched these ponies carry on in their daily lives, all smiles and normality until something happens, and when it does it's like nothing of the sort has ever happened before, like they never could have seen it coming. And once it's resolved? Right back to status quo! It's like they're willfully blind to the danger, just pretending nothing ever goes wrong until it does! Everypony acts like we aren't at risk of utter annihilation every time this happens, and sooner or later, our protecting heroes are going to lose, but everypony just ignores that!"
The pace of the rant increased with the volume of his voice. "Do you see what I'm getting at here? They lie, to each other and themselves! Once I realized that, everything was so much clearer; ponies can act the way they do because they lie, they pretend things are fine when they're not! The problems I alluded to earlier, from those of the highest ruler to the humblest serf, can go without consideration by any and all, like they'll just go away on their own! Because ponies would rather pretend to be 'happy', to pretend that the daily struggles they live with just don't matter!"
Blueblood paused to take a breath, much calmer when he spoke again. "I'm tired of the lies, Miss Dazzle, tired of fake smiles, tired of willful blindness, tired of everypony going around pretending nothing is wrong. I want to show them, to make the world see beyond the shadow of a doubt, that there is indeed something wrong." He looked her dead in the eye with a very serious expression. "I think you, your group, are just what I've been looking for to do so."
Adagio raised an eyebrow, feeling the tiniest bit insulted. "We're the something wrong you want to show them?"
His eyes widened in surprise. "What? No! I mean," he scratched the back of his head awkwardly, visibly sweating even in the dim light of the chamber, "well, technically that's part of-but, I don't, that wasn't what I meant by-"
Internally smirking, she draped a hoof over her eyes and turned her head away, projecting as much hurt into her voice as she could. "T-to think, you only offered us help because you think we're a problem, weak, pitiful outcasts that don't belong in this world!"
He held up his forehooves placatingly. "No, wait, I'm sorry, please, don't cry! I-I only meant that there was a general problem, not that you were that pr-... Are... Are you, laughing?"
What had been quiet snickers became full-on cackling as she resumed her previous forelegs-crossed pose. She smirked at the relieved, but definitely unamused prince across the table. "You might try wording your statements more carefully, both for the sake of keeping secrets and general use."
Speaking through gritted teeth, he decided to do just that. "Thank you so much for the advice, Miss Dazzle."
"No, no," she replied coolly, "thank you."
He raised a perplexed eyebrow. "For what, specifically?"
For telling me you're susceptible to crocodile tears.
She was just a little annoyed neither Aria nor Sonata had thought to test that, but perhaps no convincing opportunities arose. "Ohh, nothing," she said with a smile, innocently averting her eyes, "getting back to your reason for helping us, what exactly is it you think we'll be able to do to those ends?"
"Ah, right." he composed himself by crossing his forehooves on the table again. "Spending so much time thinking about the sorts that usually end up battling the Element Bearers, Twilight's crew, I've had more than a few thoughts on what I might say to those entities if I ever had a chance to meet them before they enacted their plans." He smiled. "However, rather than a pointer or two, 'don't stand still when they're charging up the rainbow laser,' perhaps I could do something more practical. Knowing that I alone would never stand a chance where so many other, more qualified, err-"
"Villains?" She took some measure of pride in the word.
"I would use the term 'Folk of Moral Flexibility.' Anyway, if those much more powerful than me all failed, I would surely fare no better in a direct assault. My ambition goes thus: having found some Morally-Flexible sorts to associate with, I would like to help them along in secret, to keep them from doing what I know won't work, so that when they succeed, for once, all of Equestria, all of the world, will have to stare their victory in the face, and, at last, see the way of things as I do!"
It was, Adagio thought, a pity Blueblood didn't seem to think of himself as 'Morally Flexible' enough. Scheming all this time, hiding his true intentions even from his aunts, world-altering plans, a hint of vengeful loathing? He would play the part well. Did he even realize he had raised a hoof defiantly against the skies (ceiling) towards the end there?
"As such," he continued with a pleasant smile, "I must ask; what might you need from me?"
The question actually gave her pause for thought. "Then, to summarize, you wish to force awareness of the darker aspects of life upon the world? To stop them from being happy?"
"They aren't happy, that's the whole point! No matter what the princesses say, ponies aren't bright, cheerful beacons of warmth and friendship deep down, they're cold, cowardly, petty, and spiteful! If you could see how the 'Canterlot Elite' behave when they're-" he seemed to realize something, chuckling, "well, stick with me, and you will! You'll see just how fake, just how negative some ponies really are!"
Myself included, he noted somewhat ruefully, if I'm really doing this...
She smiled. "Of course, I couldn't agree more. Bringing out that negativity is our business, though admittedly for less altruistic reasons than your own."
He smiled hopefully. "Does that mean you accept?"
Savoring his anticipation for a few seconds, she nodded. "I think we can be of use to one another, Mister Blueblood. Is there anywhere all four of us, you, Aria, Sonata, and myself, can gather in private? I'd like to have those two present when we go over the plan."
"Yes," he said, looking exceptionally pleased, "there's an airship that hardly sees much use, I'm sure the crew that work on it will be happy to see it employed."
She raised a cautious eyebrow. "Crew?"
"Oh, just the captain and some engineers, they'll be well out of sight, and out of earshot, when we're talking, I assure you."
Adagio grinned. "Perfect."
---
Adagio and Blueblood parted in the castle foyer, her having plans to explain and him having arrangements to make, but they agreed on Adagio bringing the others around the back of the castle, where a carriage would be waiting to take them to the airship, where Blueblood would be preparing things, first thing in the morning. It was with a certain measure of pride that Adagio found her way to the Pisces room all by herself!
Nopony said she couldn't, of course, but if they had, they would be looking very silly right now.
Anyway.
The muffled voices on the other side of the door told her Aria and Sonata were still awake, which would save her the trouble of having to shake Sonata conscious. Possibly having to locate her first as well. She opened the door, grinning confidently. "Good news, girls, we have a new best friend in the castle."
The two looked at her as she closed the door, Sonata the first to ask. "Does that mean Operation Lovey-Dovey Prince worked out?"
Blinking once, Adagio remembered that things hadn't gone 100% the way she planned. "Err, well," her face twisted a little, as though tasting something sour, "actually, no. Though he does know we aren't just wandering actresses now."
Sonata gasped. "You told him?!"
Aria furrowed her eyebrows. "No way, all your griping at us about giving it away and you're the one who-"
Adagio reinforced her expression with anger. "He figured it out listening to you two, you dolts!" Her cohorts were silent, giving each other worried looks. She let out a breath. "However, the situation turned out better than you might believe; he wants to work with us." She looked at Aria, receiving only a dazed 'what' kind of face in return.
Sonata proved more vocal. "Huh. Didn't see that coming."
Adagio spent the next half hour explaining what the prince had said to her and that they'd be talking to him about their next move in the morning, Aria's face alternating between smug, annoyed, confused, and alarmed the whole time.
"Dammit," she muttered, "if he wanted to cooperate, why couldn't he have just come out with it?! Would have saved a lot of time and headaches!"
A yellow head nodded. "It might have, but how might one phrase such a thing?" She adapted a face and tone of mock-sweetness. "'Hello, I'm looking for some help in uprooting the order of the land, are you doing anything along those lines? Oh, don't worry about being apprehended for treason, complete strangers, I would never tell my princess aunts or the many, many armed guards in my employ!'" Dropping the act as Aria scowled at her, Adagio shrugged a little. "Granted, it apparently turned out to be true in this case, but I can tell you how I'd have responded if he'd used that approach."
"Tch," Aria nearly spat, "you sound like you're glad he was screwing with us."
She chuckled. "There's nothing wrong with admiring the cunning and patience of another, and he went to considerable lengths to show he meant us no harm with his facade. Not at all different from what we've been doing, really."
Aria turned away, hoping the motion of draping a blanket over herself would hide the shiver that ran along her spine in the face of Adagio's creepy, other-ponies-being-evil-and-conniving-makes-me-hot grin.
Sonata seemed to remember her question from earlier. "Hey Dagi, have you ever been a pony before?"
Adagio stared back, as lost as Aria had been when she was telling them about Blueblood. "...What?"
One clarification later.
"Hmm," pondered Adagio, "that is odd, but perhaps it's because we've already grown accustomed to walking with two legs, and four isn't a considerable step forward in motor skill? For one reason or another, I know all of us ended up crawling at some point while we were banished, and this-" she cantered around the room for emphasis, "-doesn't feel terribly different."
Sonata nodded. "I guess that makes sense." She smiled at Aria, who grinned a little in return. One good thing they knew they could say about their scary leader? She was usually pretty good at making things better, even weird stuff that didn't matter.
Yep.
Usually.
That's more likely.
Kind of. Two words.
I see.
I see...
NEEEERRD!
Nothing.
Shocker.
Nice save.
Yep.
Because he has no clue what he's getting himself into.
Yeah, he's been meaning to rant about this.
Discord, yes.
In a sense.
Troll.
Pretty much. Heck, Tirek TRIED to not do so, he tried to blast them into oblivion before they could blast him and Sunset, as bad a villain as she was, nearly blasted the Humane 6 as well. And yeah, you don't stand much of a chance even WITH the Alicorn Amulet.
Morally Flexible, I like that.
He's even got the hamminess down to a T.
Amazing how she's almost childish one moment, then outright villainous the next.
Yes, but it wouldn't have been as funny.
That grin doesn't surprise me in the slightest.
I see...
Great to finally get inside this Blueblood's head. You know, before this chapter the whole "everything in the show happened in one year" thing was bugging me, that would mean the events of 91 episodes and two movies happened in 365 days, or an episode per four days on average. But for this story, it works really well, because the hammer blow of monster after monster popping up twice a week has clearly done a number on Blueblood's psyche, and the fact that his fellow ponies seem immune to any kind of PTSD or other form of shock or stress is just making it worse for him.
It seems like there are two Bluebloods at this point, the original one, who is still deep down a gentlecolt who is vulnerable to crocodile tears and prefers to work with "Morally Flexible Individuals," and the new Blueblood, who makes dramatic villain speeches and wants to shock the world.
I like that Adagio and Blueblood haven't really become attracted to each other yet, it's slow going, but they definitely admire each other's cunning and finesse.
I am a little surprised at how afraid Aria is of Adagio these days, especially without her siren magic. I guess to someone you're used to bickering with, having that person appear to visibly repress rage for a long period of time would be quite disturbing.
5749486
I'm not sure how much sense FiM's timeline makes either, but the way I understood it, the Summer Sun Celebrations in the pilot and the start of season four (just realized Tirek may have been a few months later) were one after the other, and that EQG 1 and RR were five months apart.
Also, I'm not sure how well it's conveyed, but I usually interpret Adagio as one of those characters that is, for lack of better words, Scary, Beyond All Reason. She might not beat them or anything, but a long-standing sense of threat wreaks havoc on the imagination. Blueblood can kinda relate.
5749528 There was A Summer Sunset celebration at the start of season 4, but it's not necessarily only the next one after the start of the show. Celestia goes on about how she used to dislike it because she missed Luna, yada yada, but these days it's great because Luna is back. At no point, however, does she say this is the first time Luna is with her for the celebration, or anything like that. I have no idea where this idea started, but I have seen it pop up in a lot of places.
Meanwhile, we see Winter Wrap happen in the first season, so presumably the rest of season 1 and all of season 2/3 happens in a ~4 month period? (Or you can say all the episodes of the first 3 seasons are out of order, but to me that has always been a cheap cop out). Besides the incredibly pace of reconstruction if everytime Ponyville gets trashed by a monster in an episode it is just fine a few days later, to me it just seems hard to swallow, for basically the same reasons Blueblood is complaining about: So much shit has gone down, wars and nation-wide monster attacks, that in Ponyville especially, ponies would have gone bonkers by now, with all the stuff they have to deal with in such a rapid succession. I also figure that for many of the episodes where the Mane 6 are pulled into multi-day adventures rather than working on their own jobs and businesses, if they were only getting a day or two of downtime before the next zany adventure off to Appleloosa or Manehatten or whatever, there is no way they could actually do their jobs and support themselves.
But like I said, I can see how the one year time frame plays a critical role in this story, since it adds a lot to the motivation of Blueblood and the stress he's been put under.
An intriguing chapter, and Blueblood does raise some valid points. Of course, the counterpoint is that the Elements of Harmony do tend to deal with the big threats, the Royal Guard and the Princesses are there to deal with the lesser stuff, and the population might've simply gotten accustomed to it. "Cerberus running loose? Must be a Saturday" or something like that.
Also, I've come to be of the theory that the events of the first three seasons take place within the span of nine months (start of summer to roughly early spring), based on two Summer Sun Celebrations and two Applebucking Seasons shown (first of each being in the first season, second in the fourth). EG1 would be somewhere in the roughly three month gap between Seasons Three and Four, while Season Four would take place over the course of one or two months and RR taking place six months (roughly) after the events of the first film. That's just my take, but I'm glad to see I'm not alone.
Ouch. So harsh.
Headcanon accepted.
And honestly, what a plot twist that would be.
The 'Someone Else's Problem' effect.
Well, Just Dodge addresses that fairly well; give the Tree of Harmony some credit! Though I suppose Blueblood wouldn't have read it.
DUH DUH DUUUUUH! Looks like we've got a The Villain Wins story! I look forward to it.
Spoken like a true mastermind.
Un-handwave!
Yes, I'm sure funding the villains will totally not backfire on your future. Nope, won't happen. Totes safe option. Nothing could possibly go wrong. And once that's over with, he'll retire one week later, go back to his loved ones and spend rest of his life in peace and quiet.
Well, at least his villainous trio is kinda cute, so his last days will be at least slightly more pleasant than if he was going to become a sidekick to Tirek.