Ponies buying contraceptives

by the frank

Part deux

A couple of blocks down from Never-Eleven, right next to Roseluck’s flower shop, you find the Ponyville pharmacy. It’s an old-fashioned pharmacy, where you buy everything over the counter.

Today, a white mare with a pink mane is standing behind the desk. And a red stallion with a yellow mane enters the shop.

“Howdy, Mr Dealer, Ah need some…Oh… Hello Nurse Redheart! Eh…Mr Dealer ain’t here today, is he?”

“No, he has a day off, but I am more than willing to help you. What do you want?”

“Eh…well…Ah’m…Ah’m looking for… Ah’m looking for… what the hay does it look like...what’s that little green package?”

“That’s an ointment for warts.”

“Oh…well…eh...Ah’ll have one of those. And... that box over there?”

“That’s aloe vera-ointment.”

“Oh… Ah’ll have one of those as well….”

…

“Are you looking for anything in particular, Mr Apple?”

“Ehm…yeah… Ah need some...eh… what’s that?”

“Aspirin”

“Oh. Ah could use some of that… and then...what is that there, under “intimate care”?”

“That’s is an ointment for fungus in the lower abdomen.”

“...close but no cigar...Ah’ll take one.”

“You know it’s for mares, don’t you?”

“It’s...for Apple Bloom.”

“...Apple Bloom?”

“Yeah...kids today...they pick up all kinds of stuff ya know?”

“...I guess… anything else?

“Eh…Well…it’s a bit embarrassing but… Ah want that thing over there…the one that’s hanging a bit…discreet?”

“Oh…Yes, of course! Let me get that for you. I totally understand, a laxative is not something you want to talk about with every pony.”

“LAXATIVE? Oh… yeah… yeah…it’s for…Granny.”

“Of course, I understand.”

“OH, and THAT one! ‘Perfect for a Saturday night’! That’s what Ah need! ...And exactly the right size...”

“Alright sir. That is Peppermint gum. The best cure for bad breath.”

“...damnit.”

…

“ehm… Mr Dealer isn’t around here somewhere?”

“ No, as I said. You know, Mr. Apple, I can’t help the feeling that you want something else.”

“Ah, to heck with it! Ahm just gonna spit it right out! We’re grown ponies, we can talk about this stuff! Ah want some… some… some… C…Co…Con…Cough reliever. Yeah, that’s it.”

“…Cough reliever?”

“…Yes…”

“Okay, this one is very effective. I use it myself. Anything else?”

“Ehm… Mr Dealer wasn’t here today, was he?”

“No, he has his day off, as I told you.”

“Yes…ya don’t know where he is, do ya?”

“I think he’s fishing.”

“Oh…”

“Well, sir, you want something else?”

“Oh, yeah! For mah sistah! She need some…of that gum as well… Ah’ll take another box.”

“Ok, sir.”

“Oh, and one of those little green boxes there, they look like…”

“That’s plasters for blisters, sir.”

“Oh…Plasters.”

…

“Well, sir, if you don’t need anything else, I’ll have to ask you to pay for your items. We’re about to close. It’s Saturday, you know.”

“Yes…It’s Saturday…Ah know very well.”

“That will be 54 bits. Thank you sir, and have a nice weekend!”

“THAT’S WHAT YER SAY!”

Comments

[the frank]

4998246 Sort of...

[SageBrony07]

Funny. Well it looks like both mac and futtershy can't say they want condoms. Funny.