After Discord's defeat, Celestia discovers a young creature near the Lord of Chaos' statue, A baby draconequus. Fearing a second Discord, she takes the juvenile in and raises her as a unicorn. But as the baby grows, will she remain satisfied with just the castle walls?
Page generated in 0.119 seconds
Total duration
644 users online
946,515 hits today, 2,364,530 yesterday
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Hey everyone! If there's an official spelling for Discord's race, I probably didn't pick it. I figured it had a similar root to equine, so equis. Anycase, constructive criticisms are appreciated.
EDIT: Fixed thanks to Anarchy
321339
It's Draconequus.
My OC is one in LTD and 3 of me.
This was fun to read so far. I liked the originality of the physiology of Moonstruck.
neet! though i like moonstruck's name, it dosnt have much of a ring to it.
kinda like she was more influenced by Luna rather that Celestia
Well written good sir. Also, if Celestia is 'Auntie', by my train of thought that means Luna would be 'Mommy'? Just a somthing I picked up from the whole 'Moonstruck' name debacle. But, alas, it may just be my brain malfunctioning once again.
Very neat idea, i should say. Very fun characters with nice physiology, entertaining story. Writing style is good, grammar is fine. Stalin gives you thumb up. Keep the good work!
Thanks, everyone! Wow, this really took off compared to my write-off story.
322637 that's what I thought. Thanks, mate!
323526
Lass actually
This is cute, and interesting. The idea is original and it has potential. I like it.
Tracking.
...Chaos is the magic of "death, destruction, despair, and disorganization"? Sounds like the title of this fic suggests the story's going to be along the lines of "no, actually, it's the magic of change".
Also, organized chaos exists.
Fun fact: The friendship report from Baby Cakes was almost literally picked out of a hat. I don't think I could have chosen a more appropriate one by hand.
Adorable chapter. This looks like it will be an excellent and original tale
for some reason, i can faintly see where this is going
Yeah, Moon's cute.
340702 Is that a bad thing?
342326
nope, not at all.
i just hope Celestia realizes before she regrets it
I had to scrap and rewrite the original version of this chapter because I didn't like where it was going. I've still got a long way to go in terms of tone and theme control, but I don't think I would have realized that without some of your comments. So, thanks for your views, and comments, everyone!
I'm enjoying how well Moonstuck appears to mature. Another excellent chapter
uh oh...
"Dragon Quest" Really kneecapped my original plan for the story here. I mean, if Moonstruck had been taught from Twilight and her friends reports, then why would she need to go out and do something already taught in one of the said lessons?
On another note, Discord was really hard to write for. I'm still not fully sure I did him justice. Props to the FiM team as always.
This shant end will.
I was originally going to call this chapter "The Village", but then I remembered that movie put me to sleep. I'm not sure if I should add any of the mane six to the character tags because we pretty much never see them again after this point.
Huh, looks like Spike's back from...where was he again?
oooo interesting
Older and wiser. Nice to hear that Dash made the Wonderbolts.
Who was the little filly?
380654 Well, I was originally planning on making her Twilight's daughter, but mentioning it never came up in a way that felt natural, so after she served her purpose of showing that younger ponies weren't afraid of Moonstruck because they never knew Discord, she kinda got demoted to 'extra' status.
In retrospect, I might have been able to get away with using one of the cake twins for this purpose rather than coming up with an entirely new pony, but Hindsight's 20/20 I guess.
*Edit* wow, what the hell is wrong with me tonight >_<
I was a little worried Moon might come off as overpowered after this chapter. On the one hand, if a draconequus could be struck down by conventional means, why was Discord a problem? But on the other, I established earlier that there used to be a lot of draconequines, so where did they go? I plan on explaining it later, but in the meantime I hope I didn't throw anyone.
lol cartoon burning
Loved the pile of ash and just everything about how Moon uses her magic. VERY reminiscent of 90's cartoons and I love it; it's perfect for how a "good" draconequus should be.
Boop. That is all.
Moonstruck is the Mask
*Moon gets turned into a pile of ash...then sticks her arm out of the pile*
.........le fuck?
Okay, that was glorious.
I think one of my major weaknesses as a writer is world building. It's not so much an issue here in the Everfree where there's some established canon, but it's going to become more so once we move beyond in the next chapter.
431520 Ive got no doubts that this story will be well written.
Moonstruck is such a fun character, borderline adorable.
I kind of feel like this chapter and the next one aren't my best work. I may be wrong; After all, this offers a buffer between major events and gives Moon a chance to reflect on what she's learned so far.
A mountainful of dancing yetis. Thank you for that mental image.
Is it wired that I can imagine this so vividly? Like i see it everyday?
Ha I just love how creative/different this whole chapter was! It's a great break from the usual pony fics I read.
I can't write at all, so my opinion can't be highly regarded but I loved this chapter as much as every on before it.
I require a moonstruck/draconequus smiley!
Short one this time, since Moonstruck's getting all philosophical on us.
((Spoilers for season 2 finale start here)) I might be alone on this one, but did anyone else think that Queen Chrysalis was a pretty pony, like with the straight, pinkamena hair? No? Okay... ((End Spoilers))
488261
Hey. I agree about Chrysalis. Very awesome character design
I liked Moonstruck's internal dialog during this chapter; it gave the chapter a nice deep feel to it for how short it was.
i have to agree when she says order is not always good for with out chaos there would not be change and with out order....well the world would be nothing but a ball of turmoil or how discord wanted it im not sure
Feels like things are starting to pick up again, I feel.
Now this i've never seen! Oceanic adventure with a draconequus!
I will say it every chapter, i'm loving this story!
I wonder what his reaction would be if he found out if compass rose was a golem
I kind of wish I could get the formatting from my word processor to carry over into the story form, especially in parts like this where every instance of Night Shine is italicized. Then again, if it did, I probably wouldn't give the thing a final round of editing before posting, and more than a few chapters would have been worse off for it.
If people have to focus on the formatting, then the writing is perfect; that's all I would ever worry about at least. Indeed this chapter was well done. I don't know how you do it, but you're able to get this story visualized in my head so much easier than the majority of the other stories I read. Kudos
*cue boss battle music*
I almost forgot to update today
. I was reading the newest chapter of Sweetie's Mansion ( http://www.fimfiction.net/story/7526/Sweetie%27s-Mansion ), finished the chapter, and closed Fimfiction before I remembered I had a story to update.
We are all ponies, we understand
I can't think of any comment other than how this all feels natural. When I read this chapter, I kept thinking to myself, "If I was writing about draconequines, this seems like the perfect fit." The cube makes no sense in what it is; its like the old monolith just turned into a plot-device, in a good way.
"This above all, to thine own self be true." Moonstruck is just being true to herself as a draconequus. Princess Celestia, you should know more about harmony than anypony. You should know that for harmony to exist there must be Day AND Night, Light AND Darkness, Order AND Chaos. Where Discord is the Spirit of Chaos and DISharmony, why can't Moon be the Spirit of Chaos and HARMONY? Be careful Celestia, refuse to allow Moonstruck to exercise the chaotic part of her nature, as well as her chaos magic on occasion, and they may just burst their confines one day.