I Have Returned: Chapter 22
Threat
Three years ago…
Twilight sat patiently in the waiting room. The ticking of a nearby clock starting to get annoying for her at this point. Other than that, all was silent.
Leaning her head on a window Twilight could see Earth in all of it’s glory from the view of the space station she was on. It was magnificent, oceans crystal blue, and swilling clouds covered parts of humanity's homeworld.
It felt strange looking at Earth. Twilight may have been raised on Equestria, but looking at the planet made it feel like Earth was supposed to be home. Why? Why was she thinking like that? Just staring at the planet put a warm feeling in her heart, it was almost like it was where she belonged.
That feeling was one that she used to harbour for her real home, the Golden Oaks Library, yet thinking back on it and the life she had, almost made her angry. She was so happy back then, while others were suffering. The fact that she had that great life handed to her on a silver platter when she had done little to earn it felt wrong. It felt wrong that all of Equestria was like that.
This is where she grew up though, how could she hold such awful thoughts like that to her home?
That couldn’t be her focus right now though, because today Jane was going to get her Spartan IV Augmentations. By three weeks from now, which was the time it took to get all of her surgeries done, she will have transcended what a normal human being is capable of. It was almost like becoming an alicorn all over again.
There was an insane amount of amazing augmentations that Twilight was going to get. The first one was an aug that would make her bones nearly indestructible. Secondly was muscular enhancement lining, which would make her muscles able to work harder without damaging her. After that was her Pulmonary Polymer Lining, allowing her to breathe certain non oxygen gases for up to an hour. After that was Corneal Implants, which improved her senses, and gave her better night vision. Cardiac Implants that could make her run much faster. An Artificial Pancreas Implant, which enabled her to extract more nutrients from food, with less waste. Finally there was going to be Artificial Platelet Injections, allowing her body to slow bleeding.
Essentially, Jane was about to become a superhuman. Stronger, faster, smarter. The best of the best.
People looked up to Spartans. To some, they were the embodiment of the human race. Yet here she is, an alien about to become a Spartan. Was she still a pony at this point, or has all of what she has done over the past few years truly made her human?
Jane felt a palm rest upon her shoulder, prompting the soon to be Spartan to turn around and be face to face with Admiral Osman.
“Jane, it’s good to see you.” The Admiral said.
“Likewise Sir.”
Twilight could see that in Osman was carrying a stainless steel briefcase in her right hand.
“I see that you’ve taken notice of my little gift to you.” Osman said, holding up the briefcase
“That’s for me?”
Osman handed the case to Jane. “Yes it is. Why don’t you open it?”
Twilight clicked open the two flaps keeping the briefcase closed, and lifted up the top portion of the case. Inside was what seemed to be some black folded up piece of clothing.
Taking it out, and unfolding it, Jane realized that it was an Office of Naval Intelligence uniform. At the bottom of the case was a little pin attached to a name tag that Jane guessed was supposed to go on the uniform. She picked it up and saw that it had her name on it, Jane Arimondo.
Her name… It was so strange thinking that Jane Arimondo was her name. Like it or not, for that past few years it was who she was, yet she was so afraid to embrace it.
“Some wrong Jane?” Osman asked.
“Nothing Sir, I’m just a little nervous about the surgery.”
“Trust me you’ll make it through it, I’ve dealt with worse and survived.”
For a second Twilight wanted to question Osman on that last statement, but chose not too. Chances are it was tricky territory.
“I know I will. Thank you for the uniform by the way.”
“Just remember to keep it hidden. You’re undercover, it’s only for when you need to reveal yourself as an ONI agent.”
“I’ll make sure to keep that in mind then.” Twilight said, placing the uniform back in it’s case before Osman took it from her.
“The case will be mailed to you once all of your surgeries are done.”
“Very well then.”
Osman held out her hand for Jane to shake it, which Twilight reluctantly did.
“You’re a good soldier Jane, I’m sure whoever your family is, they must be proud.” Osman said before she finally left.
Would her family accept her though? Sure they accepted Shining Armour, but soldiers in Equestria didn’t have to kill, Jane on the other hand did.
On the other side of the room though, Twilight could hear footsteps. Looking up, she saw that it was Terresia. Behind her though was two other people, a young asian man, and a black haired white man.
“It’s been awhile Jane.” Terresia said in a hushed tone.
“It has been.”
“I can’t believe you and I both get to become Spartan’s, and get to be on the same Fire team as well. What luck is that.”
Of Course Jane knew the real reason behind it, but that wasn’t something she could disclose, for now though, she would just go along with it.
“Yeah, what a coincidence. Who are the other two?”
“Those are our other Fire team members Kansuke Shimuzu, and Joseph Wright.”
The two introduced themselves to Jane, and they all had a fairly short conversation before a few doctors came out of the operation room.
“You guys are the new Spartan IV’s, correct?” The doctor said.
“Yes, that’s us.” Jane replied.
“Come with me.”
With that the four soldier entered the operation room, all of them ready to become Spartans.
__________________________________________________________
Everfree Forest present day
Roland's team walked slowly through the forest with their assault rifles extended and their flashlight attachments on; they had been told that this forest was filled with dangerous creatures and some were big enough to get them with one attack. All they had to defend themselves was their standard rifles and pistols (with only 2 backup clips of ammo) and light chest and leg armor designed for quick infiltration, not heavy assault.
The group was nervous, the team wasn't the most elite; they consisted of Joseph Wright (a fairly experienced soldier confident in his abilities) Kansuke Shimuzu (A man who had seen his fair share of battle and is somewhat of a social retard) and Terresia (The person Roland trusted the most to lead this mission effectively).
"What the hell are we even looking for?" asked Joseph.
Terresia groaned. "For the last time Joseph, Roland sent us out here to look for the entrance gate; if this planet acts as a Forerunner shield world then there must be a passageway to reach the inner sanctum of the planet."
Kansuke nodded. "Yeah, I read about something like that in the reports on Requiem. Fine lotta shit that was."
"Hey! You weren't even there Shimuzu. You don't have the right to complain."
"Tragedy's a tragedy."
"Quiet!" Terresia shouted. "Both of you. We still have no idea what could come after us out here."
Joseph sighed. "Hell of a place for them to put a gateway: Dangerous forest filled with abominations the covenant might use for pets."
"That's probably the point dumb ass, if they put it in a field filled with flowers and rabbits everyone would go there." Kansuke replied.
Terresia silently swore that when they got back she needed to ask Roland to give her more... tolerable people for the fire team. That would be pointless though because in the end once a fire team was made, it was permanent. She wasn’t usually an angry person, in fact she was often a very quiet person, but those two bumbling idiots often pissed her off. It was a godsend that the three at the very least worked well together.
After walking through the dense foliage of the forest they finally came to their destination: A decrepit, half destroyed castle that existed long before any of them were ever alive.
"We're here." She proclaimed. She pulled out an info packet that she had been given describing the details of the situation. "This place matches the coordinates Roland gave me. Come on, let's go inside."
They all marched inside carefully, the castle may have been empty but it gave off a cold, almost insidious feeling in the air that told them to be on guard.
"What a dump." Joseph said.
"Well according to the info Roland got on this place this castle in millenniums old, it belonged to the rulers of this planet back in their heyday."
"And the Forerunners build an entrance way right under their noses?" Kansuke chuckled a bit. "These ponies must be stupider than we thought if they had no idea it was here."
"Might explain why it got destroyed." Terresia waved her hand. "Both of you look around for a button or switch of some kind that could open the entrance way."
Kansuke sighed. "Right, because advanced alien races use giant red buttons to open their doorways to hidden planetary fortresses."
They look around for a little bit as Terresia examines the throne room, gazing at the thrones and banners where the two princess' probably once sat.
"Where could they have hidden it?" Terresia questioned to herself. "What possible reason could they have had to put it here? And where could they even hide it?"
In a moment of frustration Terresia kicked the throne...and it moved. Strange, it appeared to be made of a solid stone and yet it moved from her slight kick, she didn't have her strength enhancements from her suit so...why did it move?
Putting more effort into it this time Terresia kicked the throne with all her force, and as it fell to the side it revealed a glowing terminal with obvious Forerunner technology.
"Guys! I found a terminal.”
"What?"
"No way!"
She pressed a few buttons on it and that caused the floor panels to glow a bright yellow light, and then the stone retracted to open up a long winding staircase filled with futuristic stairs that led down deeper than they could see.
Kansuke stared at the stairs and admired them. "So..." He looked up at Terresia. "Ladies first?"
Terresia looked at them with a glare that said 'get down there this instant or i'll kick you so hard between your legs.
Kansuke growled. "Fine."
He was the first to walk down the staircase, followed by Joseph, and finally Terresia. They walked for quite a long time, they could see the rock change in colors and the light slowly dim as they came down deeper and deeper.
Soon enough the reached a door, with no control panels or obvious circuitry surrounding it it was clearly a manual door. Kansuke and Joseph pulled the door opened and what laid behind it was...incredible: It seemed to be filled with columns made of alien metal, technology that was old and yet somehow seemed sleek and new, and finally at the very top of the massive room there was a ball that acted like a power core.
"This... was sitting under the planet all this time?" Kansuke asked.
"If this place is filled with Forerunners... the planet is doomed. No one could survive this much raw firepower."
"Precisely why you're not going to leave here..."
A voice spoke out to them, it echoed through the entire room and seemed to have no point of origin.
"Wha-"
Kansuke's comments died in his throat however, as he was jabbed in the chest by a spike of energy. The rest of the group was shocked at the attack that seemed to come from nowhere
"Shimuzu!" Terresia screamed.
"Guy's...I don't think I-AAAAAAAAH!"
He screamed as the energy grew brighter and his skin began to ignite and peel, his body was slowly being incinerated from the inside out and when it was done all that was left was a pile of ashes.
"Run!" Joseph screamed.
He and Terresia turned tail, trying to get back to the entrance; as they ran Terresia saw a stream of light quickly pass her body and caught up with Joseph in a flash. When it hit him his eyes widened and his body slowed down... then he fell to the ground, severed into two half's.
In shock Terresia fell to the ground near the man's mutilated body. "Joseph...no."
Terresia mourned, how could she not? Something so shocking and so violent takes precedence in a person's mind...even over danger.
As she knelled there she could feel a strand of energy wrap around her head and all the way down to her throat, constricting her like a snake constricts it's prey.
The light shone so brightly that she could scarcely make out any details but she could see an entity walking towards her.
"What's the matter? You humans are usually so brave and defiant. Why do you not fight back?"
Terresia tried to shake free from her bonds, becoming desperate as the entity got closer.
"Ah, you've reverted to your true self haven't you... A sniveling barbaric creature who thinks itself above other races, thinks itself superior." It's tone became more critical over time. "When all you are is a greedy bunch who want nothing more than to crush everyone else under your boot."
Then the entity giggled. "Though I do enjoy some of your nursery rhymes. How did that one go? Half a pound of tuppenny, half a pound of treacle..."
Oh god, she couldn't mean...
"That's the way the money goes..."
Terresia closed her eyes, and prayed to whatever gods would listen.
"Pop..."
The energy contracted on her head quickly and forcefully, Terresia skull was crushed into soft tissue and bone fragments. The entity eased its grip and Terresia's body slumped over, gushing blood from it's neck.
"Goes the weasel..."
___________________________________________________________
UNSC INFINITY Bridge
Jane looked down upon the Everfree forest from the massive window in the INFINITY’s command bridge. Roland was right, it wasn’t as large as the one on Requiem, but it was still big enough to take up a sizeable chunk of the forest.
She had come so far at this point, there was no way Jane was going to turn back now. Jane was going to make sure that the INFINITY crew collected as much as they could from the inside of the planet as they could before the slip space drives were fixed.
Behind her Roland appeared on the bridge’s holographic projection desk looking worried.
“Jane, we have a problem.” He said, causing the Captain to turn around.
“And what would that be?”
“As you already know, the gravity well to the planet is open. The problem is though that I’ve been looking over some data, and signals, and it appears that the gravity well was not opened from the location that your Fire Team was at.”
This instantly caught Jane’s attention.
“What do you mean?”
“Your Fire Team didn’t activate the entrance to the planet, something else did.”
“Where?!” Jane snapped back. This wasn’t good, whatever it was.
“I don’t know, I can’t pinpoint it.”
“What about my Fire Team? Were you able to re establish a link with them?”
“No, I haven’t, they have all been offline for a while now.”
Dam! This wasn’t what she needed right now. Things were going so well until now. Chances are this was all the work of the same being who kidnapped Celestia. How could it take on three Spartans though? No, Jane didn’t know if her Fire Team encountered it, but she had to assume the worst for now.
If Jane’s assumptions were right, then this being must have killed her Fire Team, and opened up the planet to trick us into coming in.
Jane desperately wanted to punch something right now. Her Fire Team consisted of good people. They didn’t deserve to die, and this bastard must have killed them! There was no time to mourn, she would do that later. Right now, Jane had to take this motherfucker out.
“Chances are whoever opened up the entrance has a trap for us.” Jane said.
“How are we going to get around it though?”
“Sometimes Roland, the best way to counter a trap is to walk right into it.”
“You really think that’s going to work?”
“As opposed to what? Staying up here. Whoever that being is, it has the power to come aboard the INFINITY itself. I’m guessing that it’s the one who killed Lasky now.”
“So we don’t have anytime to wait?”
“Exactly Roland. We have to act now, or risk having more of us die. This motherfucker is going to cause a lot of problems if we let it roam free, so I want it dead now.”
“Should I start preparing troopers to invade the inside of the planet?”
Jane shook her head. “No, I’ll go in alone. It’s far too risky sending in a large force. I’ll go get my armour on.”
“Very well then.” Roland said, his holographic form dissapearing from the table.
Jane took one last look at the gravity well in the middle of the forest. Whoever was down there, was waiting for her. She had no idea what thing thing was capable of, or even what it looked like. All that she knew that this being might possibly be female, and that Jane was going to kill it.
The entity is female, yet she behaves a bit like Discord, if not the same. Does that mean that Celestia and Discord aren't real and are mere machines like the monitors of others installations? Or is there something bigger going on? Seeing as Discord and Celestia haven't made an appearance yet since Jane arrived, it makes you wonder how much they already know of the forerunners technology in Equestria.
Shit, this isn't Celestia that killed Laskey or Jane's Fire Team, but I know whatever this thing is, was assigned by the Ur-Didact to stop Ponykind from advancing and meeting Humanity. Can't wait to find out what this thing is.
This is a great comedy, I mean, what else could it be? Kid, this is a damn funny satire, but if you are trying to be serious then you boy need to be schooled like hell.
5940241 Well arn't you just a pleasant person.
5940409 Kid, I am a damn pleasant person, you've just selected the wrong thing to write about. What I am not is a very creative person, its a failing I know, just look at my username. CWO, Chief Warrant Officer, couldn't even come up with a catchy name. What am I going to do when the posting opens up and I am now a Major?
Anyways, about this story. Now I realize this is rooted in Halo, but there are a lot of things that just take my goat, and kid I don't even own a goat. Some of this is minor, I realize in games you got to play someone impressive, important, and a big damn hero, or for some a kickass villain. So you look past some of the stuff that can't really happen. Now just to step out of Halo for a moment and into one of my favorite all time series, Mass Effect. Great story and universe, but something (among quite a few things mind you) really grated on me with putting an O-5, Commander, on the firing line in a hostile AO. That kind of stuff does not happen in real life military operations. So you can see where my minor gripes are. Oh and one thing, no matter what rank they are, no one salutes a senior NCO and calls him/her 'Sir', these respectable sailors/marines/soldiers work for a living.
Now on to the stuff that makes me a stark raving maniac. Your rendition of Twilight, the stuff she has seen and been through in her six years of grueling time in the human world is very, very trying. I'm not here to down play how severe her time with the humans was that you are driving into our skulls. I get it, but her actions just do not jive with this. I'm a soldier, I may be about to pilot a desk when my promotion clears, but I've seen some shitte. I have done a lot of stuff I have to live with, and from reading your story, I can tell you never have. I can easily tell from how you painted this 'Jane'. I had to come down from some serious PTSD my first time out after, taking a life. When I rotated back off deployment it was not a bed of roses. But I did not decide Americans were better and I needed to go off and kill a bunch of Polacks, cause you know that's what my 'race' would be... Polish.
Jane's assault on Canterlot was a travesty. Calling out a headshot, stomping on pony's neck, no mercy... I expected her to teabag one of the damn pony corpses. I realize that all your experience in a combat operation is from playing games, but use your resources and do some research. At least watch a few war and modern military movies and shows. Personal opinion varies widely from person to person on the philosophies held by enemy combatants, but you do your job and you do not show unnecessary cruelty, or casualty. I certainly did not hold a view that people of Middle Eastern descent are mere animals, they are people like you and me with different views, so I do not understand Jane's radical twisting. It's been mentioned that she is a monster and she should never have become a soldier.
You have managed to greatly disrespect Twilight's character, given very little to the strength of her will and conviction. She is strong in her mental fortitude and her hope. Yes, I've not seen what she has, but I'm far closer to being able to understand her mindset then you are. I'm no Special Forces soldier, not even close, but Jane is and realistically their standards are probably very high. A psych evaluation, as well as constant checks, would be the norm and Twilight should never have passed the primaries. Recommendations or not.
5940593 Look, of course this story isn't going to match up with real life. No story can. I am here to tell the story that I want to tell. It isn't realistic, and it's far from perfect. I Have Returned is simply here to entertain, I'm not trying to impress people with it, be realistic, or tell a deep story.
I used to constantly try to impress people and change my story to fit what other people want. I found that it in doing that it stopped being my story. I am always open to constructive criticism, and I am willing to make small improvements as I go along, but I want to tell my story.
If you don't like my story, fine then. You have every right to not like it, and I'm not going stop you, or beg you to like it. Your criticisms have been noted, and like all criticism I get I will look into it and do what I can within reason.
Be in mind I am saying this in no disrespect for you or any soldier who have fought, and risked their lives for freedom. I will never understand what it is like doing what you people do, but you people have nothing but respect from me.
5940802 I appreciate your candor on the subject and all, but you do not seem to fully understand the words that I am typing on the screen. Adhering to super-realistic military operations, practices, and mannerisms is, as I typed, a pet peeve, but it is minor. Being able to believably tell a story that involves military themes so that your readers can suspend belief is essential. Just look how much work the developers of some of your favorite games did to give you an engaging experience. This is a major step in improving your writing. In this instance, you do not have to change your theme, plot, or direction it is creating that ambiance that allows readers to step back and feel like they are reading about members of the UNSC, instead of what feels like a bunch of kids on vent/TS playing a game.
Writing is partially about pleasing others in that sort of, "shared experience" sort of way. You need to work on that veiled "my way or the highway" attitude. Yes, it is your story and you get to tell it your way, but there is this aspect of working to share a tale. If you are only going to write for yourself then don't publish it publicly.
A large part of the theme of this story seems to be slaughtering ponies and human supremacy. I get the feeling that it is disguised, but there is some kind of agenda against the fandom. The other parts I wanted to discuss were the way over the top change in personality of Twilight to this Jane alter ego. The complete lack of any type of compassion or any remorse, other then a few lines thrown in strategically to fool us, is way too drastic. As you've stated though, you don't want to hear this, so I'm not going any further other then to say this in the most simplistic terms: your portrayal of Twilight Sparkle is completely wrong and an insult, her current state puts her heavily into the edgy mary-sue territory, and your characterization of a war-torn veteran suffering from severe trauma and PTSD is completely wrong and offensive.
I do not think your thoughts on the Elements of Harmony as merely magical power artifacts to be exploited is very good either and if others wish to discuss it, I'm willing to debate.
I can't continue reading this at the moment.
That is just my opinion.
5952992 Honestly.. I'm slightly with you... this kinda make me sick. I'm gonna take the rest of the day off from this story... come back tommorow.