Story Approver and formerly sometimes writer. PM me if you have a Story-related question.
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My one and only go at the infamous 2nd person narrative. No name, no gender, no details. Just "you."
It's been five years since that fated day that saw your arrival into Equestria. From the first moment, you captured the attention of Celestia, princess to the ponies of Equestria. Now, you want to make tonight one to never forget.
Art by Geomancing, DeviantArt
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Just a quick Q & A
Q: Oh my, why no details about "me?!" It's stupid!
A:You twit, that's the purpose of this 2nd person story. It's supposed to be you interjecting yourself as 'you.' Can't very well do that if 'you' are described!
Q: Why no name? Anon is a good one!
A: You're a moron. Anon is a crappy name, and this is not Fourchan. Plus, it implies male, which is something I'm avoiding.
Room for more silly/stupid things here later.
Celestia x Hominid... not new
This fic literally excised the tumor out of the left hemisphere of my brain.
Did you hear me? It cured cancer.
How is it you seem to be the ONLY ONE who can made a decent HiE fic?
Or, at least, one of the few who can?
Nice job on it, dude!
~Skeeter The Lurker
That was surprisingly good. And the cover art is satisfyingly hnnnngh.
Fave from me.
3170088
Of course not. I wanted to try a 2nd person story, and I wanted to use Celestia, even if it the content itself might've been slightly overused.
3170093
Fuck yeah! Now, to find a cure for AIDS other than injecting large quantities of cash into the bloodstream.
3170115
Thanks as always, Skeeter.
3170159
Thanks Pearple. : )
3170197 Too bad IT SUCKS! NYEH-HEH-HAAAAAAAAAAAAA~!
This has my attention; plus I want to see the female version, don't think that has ever been done before. It's always nice to see some new shit on this site.
So, is the female point-of-view going to have a relationship with Rule 63 Celestia when you're done with the first part?
3170273
... Might need that 3rd scenario for sex.
Pft. As if. Suck on these
3170310
Thanks, and glad to have it. All 2nd person stories love giving a name, gender, etc that to me breaks the immersion of it. I know it's not wrong to do so, but it's always bugged me.
3170324
No, that'd be changing an integral part of the story. There will be a male and female version simply because with sex, for the obvious reasons you kinda have to have a gender for the protag. This way, if I do end up continuing it past those scenes, then I can keep it vague during non-sexual scenes.
Who doesn't like a good CelestiaxHuman fic.
It is enjoyable so far. And I am really curious towards the male/female perspective.
3170378
I can say that, when it comes to the sex scenes (leaning towards writing them, will bump up the rating then) that they will not be copy/paste of one another. I'll be approaching each one with a fresh mind. After that, if I continue the story, it'll go back to being a non-specific POV again.
Well... ok I don't particularly like 2nd person fics, kind of see it as lazy writing and loathe Anon. But... you aren't using Anon and you are having the HiE be with Celestia which isn't all that common... gee I wonder why... So I'll keep an eye on this
3170655
I've come to value your opinion. Welcome aboard, and hopefully you like my attempt at this.
And it's because... *cough cough* Luna/Twilight/Dash's mai Waifu, not Celestia! *cough cough*
3170663
That is a very scary thought, someone values my opinion. And yeah that was what I thought, at least you aren't turning this into clop. Also... you know there are Celestia groups on this site.
3170684
Oh, yeah... Groups. Lemme rectify that, derp. I know I'm in one or two groups, but don't think any are Celestia-centric groups.
3170695
You need to get out more, I'm Admin and Founder of the largest Celestia centric group on the site, Protect Celestia, and this story was just added to our smaller, yet older, sister group Celestia is the Best Pony.
3170707
Thanks for pointing them out. Went through your profile to find the groups. : ) I'll have to look through for stories later
3170754
There are other groups but they are very small and not active. You're welcome and thanks for joining. Come on in and have fun, and take a look at the forum.
my interest....I cannot say how much there is...
... Huh.
Looks interesting, people tend to shy away from "cliche" human in equestria ones but i personally like those, anyway it's interesting to see a celestia love interest since luna is the most popular. Btw love the cover art, she just looks so happy and content
3170896
Glad to hear. I'm going to try and get the next segment out tomorrow.
3170908
Hi?
3171006
I wanted to use something familiar to most folks, and then change it up by doing what I'm striving to do with the 2nd person perspective. Right now it's just the plan for this one day 'in the life of' Depending on how I feel after that, I may start filling in more.
No sex please, there's enough of it on the internet as is.
3171114
While some may argue it, I either want to do that, or something that requires a gender specific action that folks would like to read. It's up in the air, this is more of a personal experiment to see if I can pull off a 2nd person story without giving any specifics and keeping the reader immersed.
I like it so far, space. It's good to see a good writer experimenting and trying to improve.
3171176
As always, Ultra, thanks. This has been on my mind for awhile, and it was interesting to write. It was nearly as easy as FeMale in a sense, but at the same time held to a higher standard.
Superb
3171057
Hi.
I'm not sure if I like this or not. I don't mean that like it's a bad thing. It has my interest. There certainly needs to be more 2nd person fics. As for the human/pony relationship, well... I don't know. You're a good writer, and I'll
stalkwatchfollowwait in an anticipation for the next good story and /or chapter from you and totally not do anything creepy at all.Good luck in writing!
3171231
Thanks
3171303
That's acceptable. Something like this, with as little content as I've provided, and the background of most stories within the same area... the track record isn't very good. Add to all of that the fact that I'm experimenting... yeah, I don't blame you for being on the fence still. Thanks for the words, I do plan on keeping with my somewhat ridiculous writing pace I've had since mid August, I'll see what may come out. Trying to update this plus another story tomorrow, as a matter of fact.
Thanks!
3171114
Not much to go on so far, but you've already managed to write something that is better than 99% of the crap you see out there, such is the state of HiE and particularly 2nd person stories.
Will keep an eye on this and see where it goes.
+5 bonus points, on my arbitrary scale of awesomeness.
with sexy results please
Holy shit, liked and faved! Looking forward to the next installment!
Second person, not clop, and well written. Did Christmas come early this year?
3171850
Jaelommiss knows whats up
Could you at least include a link back to my art? I can't do much about people using it but credit would be nice.
http://geomancing.deviantart.com/art/Dignity-348194417
3172054
He added it, I think. Go to the image and hover over it, and it should have a "source" button appear at the bottom of the image. It should link directly to your art. Now if you're actually wanting him to credit you in the description as well, that's for him to answer.
(also, great artwork. ^_^)
Seventy five minutes?
I can't even think of a single sentence in seventy five minutes, not to mention the half-hour to write, the two hours of constant rereading due to the absolutely horrifying spelling/grammar that always infests my sentences and the varying amount of time that makes up me deciding whether or not I'll let anyone besides me myself and I read it.
And people like you pull off stuff like this in seventy five minutes, go "eh, good 'nuff" and post it.
Amazing.
Not bad for seventy five minutes. Not AMAZING, but not bad I GUESS.
See, I'm not usually a fan of these kinds of stories, not only because they're almost always an excuse to write porn without plot but also because they're always "Anon" and male. It's refreshing to find a fic like this that's neither, and left intentionally vague. It's good that you'll divide the porn part if it comes to that, since some people don't like it but others do so now you'll get to keep both audiences. Also this fic involves Celestia which is great because I'm the only person in the world who thinks she's best pony unironically.
Sorry for the rant.
I'm liking how this is going so far. Can't wait for more!
It was nicely done for a 2nd person fic ^^ hope to see more soon.
3171395
Lol, thanks. : )
3171537
Thank you
3171850
Christmas is so... arbitrary. Why limit yourself to something special only once a year?
3172054
PM sent, added your FIM/DA links in the actual description for now.
3172435
I was somewhat against a wall with another piece of writing, and then I remembered one of my projects that was sitting around ~500 words that I had been thinking about for awhile. Pulled it up, skimmed it, then started a new document. It just kinda... poured out. Last update I wrote for one story was 2.3k words, and that took me nearly 8 hours. It just kinda varies at times. As for your own writing, all I can say is that, if you enjoy it, keep doing it. I find it to be a very rewarding experience in and of itself, posting here is just that added cherry on an otherwise already delicious ice cream sunday.
Also, thank you. It sounds like you enjoyed it, and I'm glad for that. : )
3172515
Pft. Not everyone can write at speeds that make international secretaries jealous, Pchn. Everyone else... I wish I could write at this girl's speed. So bloody fast!
3172812
And that's part of the reasoning behind me trying it. If I were to write the porn, it'd be because I would have to make things gender specific, thus the cause for a split off before rejoining into one before a continuation, were it to come. This is the only time I'll be writing 2nd person, and so I'm experimenting rather liberally with it.
I know some people who also love her. Although, she does seem under-appreciated, I'll give you that.
3172926>>3173218
Thank you very much! So long as my mind is willing, I'll be writing the next segment in... 3 hours or so.
So... Not starting with how he got there or how they met/fell in love? Just kind of starting on page 63 of the script, so to speak?
Yeah... No offense to anyone, but this isn't really my thing. I probably won't come back to read the other installments. Probably.
3173492
I'm experimenting. Why would I write thousands and thousands of words, or try to give some crappy, brief history in a thousand words, if that is not what I want to experiment with?
How he got there is somewhat covered in the flashback scene and there will be others scattered about, but I'm not going to really sit here and defend my reasons for covering what I did. I respect your opinion, and maybe I will see you in later updates. If not, then so be it. At least I can say that it's pretty obvious that they've been together for some time before you even open it. Can't please everyone though. Adios!
3173509
It can't take you too long to write this if the chapters are so small.
In my opinion it's not too bad, covering how they met in flashbacks is...an interesting way to go about it, but I'm not going to complain if it results in some good old fashioned loving.
By the way. The title says' She may never let you go. Does this mean that Celestia is slightlyyyy possessive when it comes to her lover?
If so then I will bloody fav, thumb up and watch this bad boy
3173561
I'm really bad at getting wrapped up in Slice of Life. I've got a concept within my mind of a sequence of events that would come about to their meeting, romance beginning, etc... That alone would take quite some time, and although I have been working with smaller and smaller chapters the more I write, it'd take a lot of exposition that would detract from what I want to play with here. That's the reason I might keep writing once I finish what this is supposed to cover.
As far as the flashbacks bit, there's another story, a Celestia x Human... think it's a 2nd POV story... that used flashbacks for the meeting/intro to Equestria. It's not a commonly used device, but if you look through my other stories one day, you'll see that I love flashbacks and dreams for scattering info. And for the quality, well... More concerned about what I'm playing with in regards to the POV than anything else.
Now, the title was sort of made up on the spot. I was thinking of Icarus at first, mostly because I decided to show the intro via aircraft. That phrase was then warped slightly to reflect Celestia as the sun, etc etc... As far as a possessive Celestia, perhaps, although nowhere near the level of insanity you love writing your characters... get the shivers thinking of just how jacked up some of the stuff you write is, no offense.
3173578
Oh, you know about my stories?
I think the 2nd pov story you're on about is This Magic Moment. It's my favorite Celestia X Human story of all time
Keep up the good work my good man. I may just fav this yet
hoooo boy. Lets see how this ambiguous protagonist thing works... Until now it has roused my interest.
I have seen this done before, but I'd like to see your take.... Aaaaaaaaaand now I have to go reread Flanking Maneuvers....