My little Zebra

by Uncle Knot

The Stone Farm

To my generous Princess Celestia in the 878th YR (year of thy reign), my 10,547th report

According to your instructions, I shall report on recent improvements with rail service. What a marvelous device these trains are and how they open new possibilities for transporting heavy freight to places overlooked by generations past. Generations we both remember well. It is near nine hundred years since we started our correspondence, and we still do not have answers to all our riddles. Yet, with this new device of train service, the need for answers becomes all the more crucial, let recent events at the Stone farm serve as an example.

Railroad expansion requires land, and J. P. Morgan has grabbed up a lot of it. While he seeks to bring benefit to all of Equstria, he can be short sighted when it comes to the common pony. Along a proposed route for a new rail line sits the Stone Farm, a patch of land owned by Mr. Granite and Mrs. Graphite Stone, and their only daughter Marble. Granite Stone has refuse again and again Morgan’s offer to buy him out. Morgan even offered a ridiculous price for the farm, but Granite and Graphite still refused.

So Morgan hatched a scheme to get the farm through their daughter Marble. He suggested, as I later discovered, to one of his employees, a rising executive, by the name of Key Lime Pie to sweep Marble Stone off her feet with parties, dancing, and song. The plan seemed to be working, Marble developed real feelings for Key. While Granite and Graphite Stone feared their desire to give Marble the farm after they passed on was furlong and meaningless.

However, something remarkable happened. Key Lime Pie developed real feelings for Marble too, and he warned the Stone family about Morgan’s plan. Marble felt that she had been foolish and had been made the fool. Morgan was furious; he fired Key Lime Pie on the spot.

It was at this point that I was drawn into this. In desperation, Morgan petitioned the powers of Equestria to condemn the Stone farm to gain a right of way. That petition came by me, instead of normal channels, perhaps because of Morgan’s insistence of speed or perhaps because I was known to have worked (in my official capacity) with Morgan before. After consulting with Morgan, and then the Stones, I almost had a complete picture, only Key Lime Pie remained. He was difficult to find, but find him I did, nursing his broken heart at the Salt Lick Saloon in Dodge Junction.

Being a loveless creature, I had no pity for Key Lime Pie, so I dragged him back to the Stone farm and demanded that he confess his true feelings for Marble. They were married within the week and the Stone farm will forever stay beyond Morgan’s reach.

Now, Morgan is furious with me, not much good that will do him. Please greet him warmly on my behalf on his next trip to Canterlot, and remind him that his competition with Rockerfilly is un-productive.

With all my generosity, trustworthiness, kindness, loyalty and humor, sincerely, your extra set of eyes and ears throughout Equestria, Sum-po-neigh Knot Yew.