Luck from a Horseshoe

by my_little_medic

Treatment for the Injured

Vince began to stir in the midst of his unintentional sleep. "Oohhh..." He croaked.

He could hear voices coming from somewhere. Very muffled and distorted at first but they slowly began to take shape in his ears.

"Hey! He's waking up!" One of the voices said.

"I reckon we oughtta let someone know. It ain't gonna be good if he wakes up in the shape he's in." Another voice said. This one a bit deeper sounding than the other.

"I'm on it!" A rough and higher pitched voice announced.

Vince slowly started to open his eyes. As his eyes transitioned from the darkness of being shut for so long, to the light of the hospital lobby, he was soon able to see blurry colors and shapes. He slowly moved his eyes around trying to help them focus in on something in the room. He slowly brought his focus front and center. He blinked twice trying to bring what he was seeing into better focus but everything remained blurry. He noticed what had to be a person in a lavender colored dress to his left and another on the right that must be wearing an orange dress.

"Wh...wh....where...am...I?" The strange white stallion managed to push out.

Twilight gave Applejack a quick glance of surprise that held the hint of a smile. "You're in the Ponyville Hospital."

Vince's brain was an internal mess. All of the day's events were starting to come back to him and mix with what was happening right now. He remembered waking up to his alarm clock and riding his motorcycle to his job. He remembered getting to work and meeting the little boy who informed him of his sister's life being saved. He remembered going on an ambulance call with his friend Jodi. Then the memories of the accident came. He remembered seeing the speeding cement truck and feeling the impact. He remembered seeing Jodi's unconscious face and then the loud snap that signified the fall from the edge of the cliff. The feeling of falling and then the impact with the ground. 'What happened after the crash?' He thought to himself. 'I must have survived... After all, I'm here in Ponyville Hospital.' His thought process came to a screeching halt. 'Wait... What hospital did she say this was?'

"Uuhh..." He groaned as he began trying to pick his head up. Suddenly the pain from his bodily injuries came rushing in like a tidal wave. Any effort he was giving to try and make his muscles work was immediately halted. "Ooowww...!" He managed to cry out.

"Stop that right now!" One of the voices standing in front of him said in a very stern voice. "You shouldn't be trying to move around in the shape you're in! The doctor is on his way here now, so you just sit tight for a little while."

He felt one of the ladies put an arm around his back briefly. "That's right hun...! Tain't no sense in moving around with a leg in that kind of shape and a busted wing." The other voice stated.

'Wait... A busted wing...?' He thought. There was a very thick southern accent in the last ladies' voice. 'She must be referring to my shoulder.' That had to be it. Thinking about this made the pain worse. He tried to distract himself away from the pain but to no avail. "Ooohhh...!" He groaned again.

The two ponies standing with the busted up stallion turned and looked down the hallway as they heard quick footsteps approaching the lobby. Soon, the nurse from the desk returned with a rather large syringe in her mouth. The syringe was filled with a deep blue colored liquid. Behind her was the doctor and Rainbow Dash flying closely behind. The doctor was a dark-yellowish unicorn stallion who was wearing a white lab coat. He wore a small pair of glasses over the bridge of his nose and had his dark brown mane combed straight back.

The doctor trotted up to the white stallion, staring for just a moment at the perfectly blank area on his flank with a look of awe flashing across his face. The doctor shook off the expression and leaned his head against the stallion's side. He could here the stallion's heart beating and feel his sides expanding as he took in shallow breaths.

Rainbow Dash had landed between Twilight and Applejack and watched the doctor.

The doctor lifted his head up and looked over at the three friends standing next to one another. "How long ago since this happened?"

"I guess I don't really know fer sure doc..." Said Applejack with a frown. "It happened just after it got dark. I can tell ya that much at least."

The doctor quickly surveyed the pegasus' injuries. "Well, it's very lucky that you were all there to witness his crash." The doctor said with some concern in his voice.

Vince again opened his eyes only to find the images presented to him still blurry and misshaped. "A...am.....I gonna.....make it?" The stallion managed to spit out.

The doctor looked down at the stallion's face. "Of course you are! But I dare say that you are in for long recovery. Now try and relax as much as possible all right? I'm going to give you some medicine. This may hurt a little unfortunately." The doctor's horn began to glow a pale yellow color before the syringe was surrounded in the same colored aura and lifted from the nurse's mouth. The doctor levitated the syringe over to the stallion and aimed the needle at the left side of the pegasus' neck. Narrowing his eyes the doctor pushed the syringe into the side of the pegasus stallion's neck.

Vince winced as he felt the needle penetrate the side of his neck. The pain from the needle was intense but short. He felt the medicine as it was injected into him. It brought a nice warming sensation with it which helped him to forget about the pain he was in. The warm feeling spread through his body, numbing any and all feeling he had. The warm feeling spread up his neck and into his head next. He felt the medicine working it's way into his mind and slowly slipping him into sleep. This however, was different than the times he had drifted in and out of consciousness after the crash. He was 'comfortable' he thought. He almost felt as if he was smiling as, once again today, his world faded into blackness.

"Can you please get this patient a cart so we can get him in for treatment please?" The doctor said glancing over at the nurse.

"Yes doctor!" The nurse replied and quickly she ran off again down the hallway.

The doctor removed the syringe from the stallion's neck and set it next to him on the bench, the aura fading from around it.

"Do any of you know who he is?" The doctor asked the three while motioning his head towards the stallion.

Rainbow Dash was the first to respond. "I know I've never seen him around Cloudsdale or Ponyville before."

"None of us have seen him before doctor." Twilight remarked.

"Well then, I have good news and bad news." The doctor stated. "The good news is that because you three were there when he crashed, you were able to bring him straight here. I doubt that he would have survived the night if he hadn't been brought in here by you all."

The nurse came back into the lobby pushing a hospital bed in front of her. The doctor looked to the nurse and then back to the stallion in front of him. A dark yellow aura surrounded the pegasus and he was gently lifted from the bench in the lobby to the hospital bed the nurse had retrieved. The doctor then surrounded the hospital bed as well with his magical aura and began pushing the bed with the stallion on it towards a hallway.

The doctor stopped for a moment, looked down and sighed. "The bad news is..." The doctor raised his head and then looked at the pegasus on the hospital bed. "We have no idea who he is... I've never seen anyone reach this age without a cutie mark. And without a cutie mark to help identify him, we have no way of getting a hold of family or friends to let them know that he is here and, more importantly, alive."

With that the doctor wheeled the hospital bed down the hallway with the nurse trotting alongside. The doors closed behind them, and the three ponies who had probably saved this young stallion were left standing there with each other.

"I really hope he's going to be all right." Twilight said in a concerned voice.

Rainbow Dash nudged Twilight with her shoulder. "Come on! He's a pegasus after all. He'll come out of this just fine. You'll see!" Rainbow Dash reassured her shakily.

Rainbow Dash had herself been in several flying accidents and had ended up staying for a few days at a time at the Ponyville Hospital as she healed up. However, neither her or any of her friends had ever been in or even seen a crash as bad as the white stallion's.

"Come on ya'll!" Applejack said as she walked over to the front doors of the hospital. "Ain't nothing more we can do for him now. Best ta let the doctor do his job."

The other two ponies nodded and they all walked out of the hospital. Each one still with a look of concern covering their faces.

'I don't remember ever seeing a mare or stallion at that age without their cutie mark...' Twilight thought to herself. 'A pony that age without a cutie mark that just all of a sudden falls out of the sky...? I better send a letter to Princess Celestia when I get home.'

"You guys wanna stop back at the hospital in a few days and check on him?" Rainbow Dash asked, interrupting Twilight's train of thought. "Company always makes sick or injured ponies feel better doesn't it? Ooh!" She shouted suddenly. "We'll have to bring Pinkie Pie with us! She always has a way of making ponies feel better."

The other two nodded in agreement.

"Sounds like a mighty fine plan ta me sugarcube!" Applejack said with a smile.

The three split up once at the center of town. Applejack started down the the path that led to her farm. Rainbow Dash spread her wings and flew upwards into the city of Cloudsdale. Twilight headed towards the direction of her house.

Twilight stopped outside the door of her house and glanced upward at the sky. "That pink falling star has to be connected to this pegasus' accident somehow." She tried to stifle a yawn as she opened the door magically and stepped inside, shutting the door behind her.

"Spike!" Twilight yelled.

A light came on upstairs and Twilight began to ascend the staircase to her bedroom. When she was upstairs she saw Spike sitting upright in his basket rubbing his eyes.

Spike yawned and looked at Twilight. "You sure stayed out later than usual... Get caught up in another book?" Spike said with a snicker.

Twilight rolled her eyes. "Not quite. We were watching the sunset in Applejack's orchard when a strange pegasus came crashing out of the sky right in front of our eyes." She said.

Spike's eyes grew bigger. "Is it ok?" Spike said with some concern.

"Well, HE is in pretty bad shape. It was a pretty bad accident." She said with some concern. "The doctor said that he'll survive, but he also said that he's got a long road ahead of him to recovery."

"Whoa! Lucky you were all there then huh?" Spike asked.

"Doctor told us that too. But the thing that really bothers me the most... He had no cutie mark!" Twilight answered.

"What?! No cutie mark? How old was he?!"

"Old enough that he should have had one a long time ago." Twilight walked over to her window and looked up at the stars. "Spike! Take a note please."

Spike nodded and quickly ran over to a shelf and grabbed an open scroll and quill pen from it.

Twilight began to recite all of the events that unfolded that evening while Spike recorded every word. She got to the end and mentioned a "PS, please ask Princess Luna if she's ever seen a pink shooting star before."

"Okay Spike, send it off." She ordered.

Spike rolled up the parchment into a scroll and placed a holder around it. Holding it out in front of his face, he took a deep breath and blew a small puff of green fire onto it. The document turned to ashes and quickly blew out the window.

"Thanks Spike. Now it's time for bed." Twilight said as she snuggled herself down under her covers.

Spike grabbed the lantern in his claws and blew out the flame before snuggling down into his bed as well.

Author's Note:

Phew! What a night!

Comments

[Alicon Glactistar]

Please,
MOAR.

[damnaion]

dam i love it

[cvvvrt]

When you made your protagonist a Paramedic, I had hoped your own job would be in the same field. You would have been able to give a realistic portrayal of emergency medical services and medicine in general (at least up to the point of entering Equestria, which is definitely outside the realm of realism.) I am not a medical professional myself, but the possibility of insight always excites me.

However, so far the medical accuracy of your story has been extremely poor. Together with the focus on medical procedures and characters as supposed medical professionals, this becomes so jarring it I rips me from the immersion into the narrative. Your story shows the typical mistakes of Hollywood medicine, such as magical defibrillators and harmful first "aid."

Defibrillators are for stopping hearts, not starting them. They can also cause burns wherever metal (such as necklaces) touches the patient.

I believe neither do Paramedics drive ambulances; they have designated drivers. The highly trained Paramedics are far more valuable watching the patients.

Medical staff do not condone watchers, rubbernecks or bystanders in (potential) emergency situations—disruption or simply standing in the way could be disastrous. If Vince and Mark are not actively "working on" the girl, they would not be at her side. If they aren't needed, they wouldn't even be in the same room.

Equestria's magic might mix things up a bit, but care should be taken to make it believable and consistent. Although some might disagree, ponies are made of flesh and blood, not marshmallows, so they should follow similar rules. For example, in the last chapter you described Vince as suffering from an open fracture and a mangled wing. These are extremely serious wounds, yet you have him only bleeding from a "few cuts and gashes here and there, but nothing major."

While I can ignore a lack of first aid knowledge on part of the mane six, the nurse and "doctor" show blatant unprofessional behavior. She should have yelled for assistance immediately; nurses have enough training to start assessing/triaging a patient and administering aid. Instead, she left, but not before ordering Twilight to set a patient in obviously critical condition (unconscious, with broken bones and a possibly broken spine) down on some "pillow-cushioned benches."

In this chapter, despite the seriousness of Vince's injuries, the doctor doesn't seem to be in a hurry at all. He calmly converses with the visitors (which are still in the way) and the patient as if Vince walked in complaining about minor heartburn. The open fracture is not even mentioned. All Vince gets is a bed and some vague technicolor injection amounting to an anesthetic and a sedative, maybe morphine.

I recommend reading at least the linked TVTropes pages (as they were written with fiction in mind), as well as ArtisticLicenseMedicine and any relevant further links. You can also inform yourself about how emergency departments operate (which even have dedicated entrances, typically).

Also:

"We have no idea who he is... I've never seen anyone reach this age without a cutie mark. And without a cutie mark to help identify him, we have no way of getting a hold of family or friends to let them know that he is here and, more importantly, alive."

The doctor contradicts himself here. An inquiry about a grown stallion with the unique lack of a cutie mark would be just as promising, if not more so.

In conclusion, while your story shows promise, I find it difficult to stay immersed. I went over my gripes with the content in some detail. Skimming this chapter again, orthography seems to be fine, with the exception of comma use. Grammar is basic and at times your sentences don't flow well. I suggest asking for some support from fellow authors and an editor. If you can get either from someone who has some professional medical knowledge as well, even better.

[Buckshot2825]

3771196
Um, not to be offensive, you really did make some good points in your comment about knowledge holes and everything, i completely agree on some cases.

But how do you even read ANYTHING? Most stories here are written by uninformed hobbiests who just happen to have some time on their hands and ideas to share. If you're going to nit pick all the wrong details out and not enjoy the story at all why do you even read it?

Just an honest question.

[memmmmm]

3771196 put defibrillator into a search engine "Defibrillation is a process in which an electronic device gives an electric shock to the heart. This helps reestablish normal contraction rhythms in a heart having dangerous arrhythmia or in cardiac arrest"