Don't Go

by fallen starr

Chapter Five

Spike was amazed at how time seemed to fly. He had started counting the days, telling Twila how long he and Rarity had been together every morning. They went on their first date, then a second and third. His job at Rose's Roses kept him from spending as much time as he would have liked with her, but it worked out well. They spent the evenings together three or four days a week.

At one month, Twila told Spike to stop informing her of the day count. Rarity went on a weeklong trip to Camelot while Spike stayed behind. She came back, saying there were plenty of places she could afford to rent, but no shops in the district she wanted in.

Her trips became more frequent, with Spike always staying in town. It wasn't that she hadn't asked him to come, but that he felt he needed to stay. He wasn't sure why he felt he needed to stay, just that he did.

At three months, Rarity took a two week trip to Camelot. Spike almost went with her then. He would have seen the Princess, he could have met up with some of his old contacts, and he wouldn't be without her for two weeks, but still he stayed. He felt that going with her would be betraying something, What, he didn't know.

Those two weeks felt like they took forever. Rarity wrote him a few times, and he wrote back, but it wasn't the same. Spike found himself missing holding her soft hand in his, the feel of her lips against his, the sound of her voice, the tinkle of her laugh. Two weeks shouldn't have made him feel like that. It was as if he was in one of those sappy romance stories Rarity loved to read. Still, when she finally returned, he stayed by her side the rest of the day. And the entirety of the next one.

She didn't take another trip for nearly two and a half months. When she did, it was only for three days. Stepping of the train, her smile said it all—she had accomplished her goal.

She ran into Spikes open arms on returning. "Oh, Spike, it's so wonderful. I have a shop. I have a flat. It is really happening."

Spike's smile froze on his face. "That's…great, Rarity."

She pulled away from him, her smile still on her face, but her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "You don't sound very happy. Is something wrong?"

"Of course not," Spike said, his voice full of happiness that was obviously false.

The others weren't there this time, since the trip had been so short. She took Spike's hand as they walked out of the train station, her luggage floating magically behind them. "Somethings bothering you. What is it?"

Spike shook his head. "You're moving."

"Well, yes dear, I am. Everyone's known that for six months."

"I thought you would stay."

Slowing to a stop, Rarity turned and looked at him. "Stay here? S-Spike, why would I stay here?"

He let go of her hand. "For us. So we can stay together. Why wouldn't I expect you to stay?"

Rarity took a minute to speak, and when she did, her voice was low. "I told you I was moving. Before…I thought…I knew we shouldn't have done this."

Rarity had made his heart beat fast before. He had thought it would explode out of his chest at times. Now, though, he felt his heart stop. "What?"

"I really…" He watched as the mask she wore in her shop, the one that showed only a neutral pleasantness, came up. "I really thought we had it. I guess I was wrong." She walked away, head down as if she were buffeted by fierce winds.

Spike wanted to run after her. He wanted to grab her and spin her around and kiss her. He knew that would do nothing. It wouldn't help anything. She was still leaving. So he stood there, in the middle of town, watching as she got further and further from him, until he couldn't see her anymore.

Slowly, he walked home. He took his time, kicking at pebbles in his path. What had he done wrong? So he wanted her to stay here, with him. So he wanted to be with her. Was there anything wrong with that?

By the time he made it back to the library, he wasn't sure what he wanted anymore. He was surprised to hear her voice in the kitchen, though. He moved toward the kitchen before stopping and shaking his head. No, it wouldn't due to see her, not right now. He quietly made his way up to his room.

He stared around at the pictures they had taken together over the last few months. One of their first date that Twila had taken. One where she had dragged him to the spa. On his nightstand was the one of them just before leaving for her birthday celebration.

It had been a simple date, really. Just a dinner and a stroll through town. Nothing they hadn't done dozens of times before. They were linked together, her head resting on his shoulder as they walked. "You're so good to me, Spike," she said. "You are a magnificent boyfriend." He smiled, unsure of what to say. It didn't matter, though. He just squeezed her hand tighter, letting her know he heard.

They walked aimlessly, until they were in front of her shop. "Oh, here already," she said. She sounded disappointed.

"That's okay, we always have tomorrow," he said. They were facing each other, his hand stroking down her face. "And forever."

She smiled, looking directly into his eyes. "You always say things like that."

"I only say what I mean. I never intend to leave your side."

She was silent for a moment, her smile softening. "Why don't you come inside for a moment? Twila isn't expecting you back yet, is she?"

"She's having another sleepover with Pinkie, actually," he said as he followed her inside. "They seem to be having a lot of those."

Rarity's eyes shimmered with excitement. "Yes, they do. But that is a mystery for another day." She walked through the shop and to the living quarters. "Would you like some tea? Water?"

"No," he said.

Suddenly, she turned. "Spike,' she said quietly, "I've had a lovely birthday. Twenty-seven is…interesting. Do you…ever feel that I—"

Spike sighed. "We've been over this. You're never going to be too old for me." He put his hands on her waist, drawing her to him. He leaned in, placing a small kiss on her lips."You're too beautiful." A kiss on her forehead. "You're too smart." A kiss on her cheek. "You're too generous." A kiss on her other cheek. "You're too compassionate." A kiss on her neck. "You're too good."

She ran her hand through his hair, which had grown out nicely from the Mohawk. "Spike," she whispered, taking his face in her hands, forcing him to look at her. She leaned in, and their lips met again. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her as close as he could as her hands traveled, up and down his back, through his hair, along his shoulders.

When they broke apart, he rested his forehead on hers. "I love you, Rarity."

She didn't answer. She looked in his eyes, and he looked in hers. Reaching down, she took his hand and lead him out of the kitchen, up the stairs, and too her bedroom.

That had been a month ago. And now she wanted to leave. She to go to Camelot and leave him behind. Maybe their break-up was for the best. He would just be something to tie her down. She couldn't be her best with him here, waiting for her to return.

It would never have worked in the first place. He wouldn't fit into her lifestyle there. He liked things to be simpler. He knew what it was like to live in Camelot. He had grown up there.

So he stayed in his room. He avoided her. He didn't go to her farewell party three days later. He didn't help her pack up her shop. He didn't go to any of the outings with her and the others. He didn't go when she finally left for Camelot.

He didn’t do much more than go to work and come back to his room during that time. And the time after. Until Twila knocked on his door a week later. "Spike," she asked, poking her head in. "What do you think you're doing, staying cooped up in here?"

Spike didn't answer, instead choosing to stare at the ceiling.

"Fine. Rarity wrote you. Here's the letter." Twila threw the letter onto the bed and turned to leave, but stopped. "You really hurt her, you know. Not showing up. It's like you don't even care."

"I don't," he said. "She wanted to leave. That's her thing. Whatever."

Twila sighed. She walked over and sat on the edge of the bed. "You know, she told me when you guys broke up. She hadn't meant to say what she did, but she felt like she couldn't take those words back. She misses you, a lot."

"She chose Camelot. She has Camelot."

Twila wrinkled her forehead in confusion. "What? Spike, she wanted you to go with her. She…she didn't tell you? She kept trying to get you to look at places with her. She…she really wanted to be with you."

"She never told me that."

"Did you ever give her the chance? Or did you brush off anything she said about Camelot? Because that's what it sounded like."

"I…What…Twila, what did I do?" The words were mumbled as he put his head in his hands. "I just wanted her to stay here, with me. And she…she…"

"Read your letter, Spike," Twila said. She stood and walked out of the room. "And maybe, open your mind a little more."

Spike picked up the letter gingerly, as if the slightest move could turn it to dust. He ripped open the seal and looked over the delicate hand writing. It was a short letter, but he read it several times anyway.

Spike,
I'm doing well. My shop is in the perfect location. You would love it. And I know you would like the flat, too. It's rather close to the palace. My customers are pleased to see me here in Camelot, and I've gained a few more. I missed seeing you since I returned from my final visit of Camelot. I guess you were busy with work. I just wanted to let you know all was well.

With love,
Rarity

After reading the letter for the final time, Spike sped down the stairs. "Twi…I need to go to Camelot."

"I'm sure you do. Train leaves in the morning a seven, I checked when I saw that letter."

Smiling, he grabbed her into a hug. "You're the best, you know that?"

"Yes. But hearing it is nice."

Going back up the stairs, Spike set to packing his bags. He had an early train to catch.

Comments

[Victoria_the_dragoness]

A few bumps and bruises, but Spike is learning. I am happy that this wasn't an extended affair, I couldn't have dealt with the suspense. Phew!