Once upon a time, in the magical land of Equestria, there were two regal sisters who ruled together and created harmony for all the land. To do this, the eldest used her unicorn powers to raise the sun at dawn. The younger brought out the moon to begin the night. Thus, the two sisters maintained balance for their kingdom and their subjects: all the different types of ponies. But as time went on, the younger sister became resentful. The ponies relished and played in the day her elder sister brought forth, but shunned and slept through her beautiful night.
One fateful day, the younger unicorn refused to lower the moon to make way for the dawn.
The elder sister tried to reason with her, but the bitterness in the young one's heart had left her vulnerable to malicious dark spirit that transformed her into a wicked mare of darkness: Nightmare Moon. She vowed that she would shroud the land in eternal night. Reluctantly, the elder sister harnessed the most powerful magic known to ponydom: The Elements of Harmony! With their power the eldest was able to separate her sister from the nightmare, but the spirit had already drained her of most of her strength. After a long and painful battle, the two sisters were able to use the elements and their remaining power to seal the nightmare into the moon.
Drained of all their power and life force, the sisters embraced one final time as the faded from the mortal coil. First to go was the eldest who had given all to save her dear sister's soul, and as she breathed her last, the Elements of Harmony shattered into crystal shards. The youngest joined her beloved sister soon after but not before giving this prophecy.
“On the longest day of the thousandth year, the nightmare returns, but worry not little ponies, fore when she who is the dawn and dusk and she who sparkles in the noonday sun are found, so too will the sisters be found again.”
---VVV---
With a small sigh, the well worn and slightly damaged book was closed and a young unicorn mare rose to her hooves to stretch. She had a lavender coat with a dark blue mane with streaks of purple and pink through it, on her back she wore a worn brown cloak with the hood down and an old saddle bags that looked like they might ripe at any moment. It was early morning and she had wanted to get a little reading in before she went to work, but now her free time was over and if she didn't hurry she would be late for her job so after putting her book into her bags and putting up her hood, she set off at a brisk trot.
As she trotted down the road, her mind once again wandered to how had come to this.
---VVV---
Power, overwhelming power. Try as she might, magic had always been difficult to squeeze out of her little horn but now something wrong. She had been trying to get her magic to turn the page of her book when a loud thundering noise scared her and now... it...just ...wouldn't ...STOP!!
I'm scared, I'm scaredI'm scaredI'm scaredI'm scaredI'm scared....
mommy
daddy
HELP ME!
“Twilight!”
Her parents were there, calling out to her, trying to reach her through the chaotic magic storm bursting out of her but were making little progress. Eventually their luck ran out and a bolt of magic struck them before they could dodge, throwing them into a wall over twenty feet away, before blasting them again.
The last she saw of her parents was her mother cradling her father as blood dripped from the back of his head before they were hit the second time, leaving only a thick black scorch mark and a blood stain on the wall.
---VVV---
Twilight's pace slowed, her head bowed as a few tears fell from her eyes. That was many years ago when she was still just a little filly. She had blacked out not long after her parent's death, when she came to, her home had been totally destroyed. The book was the only thing she could find in the wreckage that was intact. When the city guards finally arrived on the scene, all the found was filly Twilight cradling the book, sobbing quietly.
The orphanage that took her in was nice enough, she never went to bed hungry or was too cold in the winter, but there was always an underlying fear whenever she was with the caretakers or the other children. They knew what she had done and while they were never mean or outright ran from her they all acted like she could blow up at any moment.
And so, at the age of 8, Twilight quietly packed up her book and a few meager supplies, and silently left in the dead of night.
Since then Twilight had traveled from town to town trying to find work and a place to stay. She had been incredibly lucky so far, especially in the beginning, to have found plenty of good ponies who would take in a starving and exhausted filly, even if for only a day or two, and that she had been able to resist resorting to thievery to get by. But...
No matter where she went, or how far away from her home town of Canterlot she was, somepony always seemed to learn about her accident. And even though she had sworn to never use magic again, the fear would set in and she would set off to the next town, trying to outrun her past.
Twilight shook her head to clear her thoughts. She had arrived here in Ponyville only about a week ago and got a job helping the Apple family at their farm. The work was hard but the bits were good and hopefully she wouldn't have to worry about leaving town for a good while yet, she needed to save up the bits to get a new winter cloak this year, even if it meant going hungry for a few nights.
But none of that matters right now, cause if I don't get to the farm in the next two minutes, they're going to dock my pay!
With her head back in the present, Twilight broke into a gallop, praying she wouldn't be late.
---VVV---
“I'm here!” Twilight called out as she arrived at the big red barn, dropping off her saddle bags at the doors and pulling down her hood, though she kept the cloak on.
“Bout time ya got here missy!” The Apple family's eldest daughter, an orange coated, blond maned earth pony with a worn but well kept cowboy hat called Applejack hollered back as she towed a wagon full of empty apple buckets out of the barn. “Any later and we woulda had to make good on our threat ta cut your pay!”
“Sorry...” Twilight cringed back, avoiding eye contact.
“Now none of that, chin up sugarcube we got a long day ahead an a lot ta do! Now then, today Big Mac is up in town workin the stand so that means its just you an me buckin the apples an we need to get least fifty trees worth done today so lets hop to it.” Applejack said as she headed out towards the groves.
A small shy smile escaped Twilight as she got infected by her boss's enthusiasm.
“Yes ma'am.”
---VVV---
It was growing dark by the time they finished with the days chores. It was only Twilight's third day on the job and she was still trying to get into the rhythm of farm life, but she didn't once complain about the hard work even now that was completely exhausted. She wasn't quite sure what to make of the strange glances Applejack had been throwing at her all day, but she was too tired to really think about it.
“Well that's it for today sugarcube, tomorrow starts bright'n early so get a good dinner and plenty o'rest ya hear? “
“Yes ma'am.”
Twilight's tired voice is so low Applejack has to stain to hear it causing her to frown.
“Ya know you're welcome ta come share dinner with the family, and we do have a room ya could use so ya wouldn't have ta worry bout be on time no more...”
This shocked Twilight out of her lethargy for a moment. It wasn't the first time the offer was given to her and it was oh so tempting, but...
“No no nono! I'm fine really, I... I already found a... a nice place to stay. And I wouldn't want to impose really...”
“Uh huh,” it was the same response she always gave, Applejack probably didn't believe a word of it, but she didn't press the issue. Instead she turned and walked into the barn with a “wait here a min.”
Twilight considered bolting, but thought better of it and after slipping into her saddle bags, fidgeted nervously as she waited. Applejack came out a minute later with a bulbous brown paper bag and held it out to Twilight.
“Here.”
Twilight took it a little nervously, not sure exactly what was happening. She opened the bag to see it was full of apples, quite a few of them too! She closed the bag and tried to give it back.
“I..I can't accept...” Applejack silenced her with a look, took the apples, and purposefully put them into Twilight's saddle bags.
“You can and you will. That cloak may hide it most o'the time but I saw plenty today. You're too skinny, no meat on them bones. What've you been eaten lately? Grass? Ya need ta be eatin more then that if you're gonna keep pace on the farm.” She turned to walk towards the farm house, the lights inside giving it a warm glow against the dark sky, before she turned back one last time. “I won't say it no more since ya seem intent on not taken it, but know that ya will always be welcome at the table from now on. You're a friend, and us Apples always take care of our own.” She finished and enter the house, out of sight.
Twilight stood there in the dark for a minute more before turning and walking away, tears in her eyes. She wanted to take that offer so badly, so much it physically hurt to walk away, but... she knew it was the right thing to do. She couldn't afford to get attached, not to the Apple family, not to Ponyville, not to anypony. Because soon enough they would find out and she would have to leave, and it would hurt so much more if she did take that offer, because then they would become friends.
And that would make her heart hurt even worse.
---VVV---
That night, in a small cave near the Everfree forest, Twilight gazed up at the night sky as she ate the apples Applejack had given her as well as some wild flowers she had chanced upon. She loved watching the night as the moon slowly crossed the sky, though a part of her was annoyed by it as well. Twilight didn't know how she knew but she knew... the night sky was a complete mess. Beautiful, but still a mess. The stars weren't in the right spots, constellations all but gone, and the moon was just a bit too fast. At that speed there would be another eclipse in a few months.
Twilight sighed and forgot about such thoughts, after all it wasn't like she could do anything about it. Finishing off the last apple, she brought out her book for just a little reading by moonlight before getting some sleep for tomorrow's busy day.
Once upon a time, in the magical land of Equestria,...
I like. Good JOB!
I wasn't sure about this, thinking this story was to be grimdark like hell, but the summary got me and I went ahead to read it. Damn good thing that I did. I have not seen a plot like this before, that in itself is a good thing, but to have one like this? Damn man I expect great things from this story. As this is the first chapter I will withhold judgement until later, but from what I have seen this is going to be great.
In the Name of Her Serene Majesty,
Celestia's Paladin: For Honor and Duty, For Sun and Moon
*Long, shuddering breath out, deep calming breath in* Do you know what I had to do to write this? I had to try to log in, realise My dad had turned the modem off so my wireless was off so I COULDN'T log in. So I had to decide whether to tiptoe through my darkned house or walk a kilometre or so to the nearest spot wit Wifi. I had to look for and realise I wad out of Shirts, So I COULDN'T walk to the nearest Wifispot. I had to Tip-toe through my darkened house, turn the modem on and run into Three walls, Jarring my Fractured toe quite badly in the process (The Pedants out there will note I Didn't HAVE to run into the walls, However, due to my poor night vision, run into the walls I did). I had to return to my bedroom, still in pitch blackness, run into another wall, then into my door and then get onto my Handheld gaming device (a.k.a. my Shitty Little Gamebox a.k.a. my only way to connect to the internet, given the only computer is in the room next to my parent's room AND is currently on the fritz) Then I had to attempt to log in. Then I had to attempt to log in. Then I had to attempt to log in. Then I had to attempt to log in again. and again. and again. and again. For about an hour and a half. Then I realised, silly me, I had to Aaaaalmost but not quite click the Log in button Twice, to lull it into a false sense of security, before caaarefully easing it down all the way. Then I had to look the other way for five minutes before sneaking through a link before it noticed I was getting away from the front page with my username on.
So, that over, I say this: You've been spelling "Mam" wrong. It's spelled Ma'am (or M'am if you're suffering a drastic A shortage) Ma'am is a contraction of Madam(e, if you're posh) whereas Mam is an endearment for one's Mother or Grandmother Other than that, No problems I can see. Tracked
Intriguing idea.
Slight error though.
...embraced one final time as the faded from the mortal coil.
Interesting concept. Tracking.
Do you need a proofreader?
Trackng, this seems good
235521 wat
ooh interesting, Celestia and Luna for lack of better word and specifics died, Twilight is a homeless fugitive more or less and everypony else is just there. Makes me wonder hought, Has Celestia already reincarnated and is princess again, if not who rules equestria? And could Twilights exception magic ability (to the point of blowing up her own house at age 8, Yikes,) Be any connection to Celestia soul? And does Nightmare Moon exist or did you mean she returned to Luna right before she died so she'll just be born again soon?
Confound these ponies they drive me to speculate and theorize!
I love it. But i will say that the description seems misleading. I wouldn't have clicked on it if it wasn't featured. Maybe you could work on that.
Still, I'm glad i did. Tracked!
235557
I think you mean a hoofreader.
I want to read and i will indulge myself this once
Tracked and... erm, thumbed up?
...Twilight, why do you keep saying "yes" and then my initials? I'm not in this story, and I am most certainly not Applejack, so I think you mean "ma'am" not "mam."
Not bad. I would definately want to read more.
So without Celestias intervention, Twilights spark killed her parents. Amazing how taking away one little piece of a puzzle can change the entire outcome.
Hmmm, I like this one. Tracking. Could use proofreading but that's about it. Good job sir.
235587 actually i think twilight sparkle is atleast in this story a reincarnation of luna based on the vibe i got when she started contemplating on how the stars were in the wrong place. atleast thats what i'm getting sofar i wonder who would be celestias reincarnation? either way following.
nice.
236409
wow a fusion of twilight and Luna? God if that is true this fic has combined my two favorite ponies into one mass!
And if not we still get an interesting plot so either way winning!
Interesting. Very interesting.
wow, this is certainly an original and very interesting concept here. Wonderful start on the first chapter, though I think this needs a proofreader badly :/.
Tracked and eagerly awaiting the next update :D
Have a good one.
i like
looking forward to where this story is going
that is all
kthanxbai
This should be most interesting! Though you may want to find a pre-reader/editor, as there were errors scattered here and there. Still, unique enough fic for me to look past and track!
~ Moonstone, Minstrel of Equestria
Definitely Tracking
236409 I get the feeling she might be both. Just in that Twilight is the meeting of day and night, and I'm guessing the fact that she killed her parents instead of turning them into plants like in the show is just to show how much more powerful than even the show's Twilight is. I noticed the Sonic Rainboom still happened, so I'm wondering if Twilight is the only real difference, if everyone of the others are there in Ponyville or not.
I like it , I hope to see more.
Yeah, I'm liking this so far. It seems obvious Twilight is "she who is the dawn and dusk", but the "she who sparkles in the noonday sun" could be referring to Twilight Sparkle too... is she suppose to be both of them? I thought at first that maybe the prophecy just meant Twilight would be the one to FIND the sisters' reincarnations, but that bit at the end about knowing the stars were wrong, and not knowing how she knows, really implies that she IS a reincarnation, of Luna at least.
Great start amazingly original idea! The summary had me suspecting something entirely different but this is quite different. Though poor Twilight, just how old is she at this point?
Lets see where this goes, and if it will turn out unique and fun to read, or if it will fail and never update and end up unfinished.
hopefully the poor author plannes on continuing, this is actually a good story.
I like it
I give you five out of five staches
Now what's the ETA for chap 2?
The beginning is so sad i cant believe that happened. i think they should now have a twighlight crying emoticon.