How do you belt these out so fast?? HOWWWWWWW?

~Skeeter The Lurker

2818321
Because Pinkie Pie.

2818330

Seems legit.

~Skeeter The Lurker

2818330 Unf.

2818335
This site is lacking in 'bondage' short stories.

I guess you could say I'll

*puts on sunglasses*

fill that hole.

2818368 :yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay:

Hot damn this is fantastic! Rarity really does make an excellent dom, and self-bondage Fluttershy............why did this never occur to me before!? Brilliant, just brilliant. Keep it up.

I don't usually read clop, but since birthday, I wanted to see what you wrote. Noticed almost no mistakes, largest one being bear, not bare. Very fun read, I suppose... I really want to see the author you become.

i1.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/444/725/397.gif

This didn't surprise me. Fluttershy is Hardcore.

as a hard end sub i hafta say.

i.... i want to be rarity's pet to.
shes almost as good at that as my wife's girlfriend.

*Slams face into desk*

What did I just read...

Second Chapter maybe?

2818716
It's always us.... I mean those shy ones that have the really kinky fetishes, like self-bondage and um... what else can I do solo?

2818763
One day I might get to be somepony's pet too, or at least a sub.

2818806
The greatest self-bondage on the site?

2818454

Must resist urge....

Did I pop your clop cherry?

damn it.

Yeah, I'm interested in what kind of author I'll become too. I've always love "jack of all trades" classes. I want to do everything. Druid, Bard, ..... that's all I can come up with, but you get the point.

I plan to write *every* genre tag and every pony. I'm thinking of doing self-bondage for all mane six. Also, I don't think I've written in the [Adventure], [crossover], or [alt universe] genres yet.

Three times it's instead of its, tense shift, and one thing that seems to have missing words, just to quickly get this out of the way. Yah, great. Blablabla, I don't want to focus on that for once.

Now for the really important stuff:

WAT DE FACK MAN!?

JUST.... WHAT....

THE FUCK...

So or similar to that must've been my thoughts when I started reading.

2 pages in: "I need crazy death metal music for this."

5 pages in: "I need to turn my E-Reader from right to left handed mode."

9 pages in: "This isn't just bondage, this is fucking torture. Literally. FUCKING TORTURE."

Last page (13): "Wait what? I didn't clop..."

The mega ultra special deluxe orgasm was way too short for my needs, and it was over before I realized it was over. I think your self insertion is rather Rarity than Fluttershy for that reason alone. :C

I guess clop doesn't work properly if the author in question even takes it remotely seriously. Or maybe BDSM is not my thing, w/e. I can see the appeal on it though.

But one thing I don't quite understand:

Nipples on ponies. Like, where are they supposed to be? And how many nipples do they have? Especially because clopfics require imagination, I still have great troubles imagining them.

2818997 I will except anything but crossover (not including Ponymon)
the last thing we need is yet another Halo crossover with ponies or worse.

CB

2819022
That was hard to find, but here it is:

Mares (female horses) have "teats". They are located up between the hind legs. Look under the belly, towards the hind legs, and you'll see the mares udder and teats.

And, silly me and my habits of ending the story leaving the reader wanting more / using their imagination. Her super orgasm was what ever you wanted it to be.

Now, I've got some important poking the ground with my hoof to do.

2818970

Weirdest*

Yet funny to me... Somehow...

WAT.

How do I think this funny?!

2819143

It made her explode and everypony died except Twilight Sparkle, Spike, and Princess Celestia?

What great imagination I have...

2818997 You'll probably be amazing in any genre you write in. Well, I just read these to read them, I don't actually clop.... I can remember one of my friends laughing at me when she accused me of being a clopper... So you haven't popped it yet... Unless you mean reading a clop story, then still no. University Days did it for me. So Dawnfade did it...

2819143
Oh no you don't!! See this emoticon?

:)

If you don't start smiling immediately, I will brutally murder it! By hitting backspace... twice!

Seriously though, it wasn't bad. I'm just very demanding at times, hehe. And hey, if you're willing to take ten minutes off your time, you could expand on that last section and easily perfectionize it.

Also thanks for that crash course in horse nipple anatomy! Definitely not the kind of knowledge you can highlight yourself with, but the more you know!

" making myself a salad"
cdn.alltheragefaces.com/img/faces/large/angry-desk-flip-l.png
the fuck is this shit?!
Nice ending, well written and pretty funny too.

A lot of these stories lead to the same thing. They just get more
#sunglasses#
FUCKED UP.

lol i love you kaidan

you are the best author on fimfic

2819186
University days was my first clop story I read too

As to actual clopping, MLP is about 14 years late to that party...

2819211
I suppose I'll retcon and expand the ending. To be fair, it was time to go home from work so I had to wrap it up quickly. I'll write something about how her mind drifted into the fiery heart of the cosmos.

2819404
They say write what you know, and I know self-bondage.... from uh, reading about it on the internet.

Dammit kaiden stahp writing cloppity clop clop and create more morbidly awesome stories.

2819274
Funny? Ok then...

Not my thing (Glad it isn't) but interesting read....

2819211
NO. ONLY PONY EMOTICONS. YOU ARE A BAD PERSON AND SHOULD DIE. KAIDAN MAKE A RAPE FIC WHERE WHOEVER I'M REPLYING TO GETS RAPED AND DEN A ZOMBIE COMES AND SLOWLY EATS HIM.

2819022
Two, on the back of the belly near the ass.

2818997
Kaiden. Kaideen do one where Celestia gets banished to her sun with a Nightmare Moon-ish relapse and Twilight has to take over Luna with Luna..

2819632
Yeah, that sounds good.

Maybe you would've finished it if you wouldn't always come half an hour too late into work on purpose. :P

2821720
The mobile version of Fimfiction doesn't have pony smilies in the reply form, and I don't know the :x: tags by hard, so standard colon-letter ones have to to the job.

Also, if I would've posted a pony smiley and said I would kill it, I'd indirectly be also saying I'd kill that pony, and that wasn't the plan. I'm not that fucked up to want anypony dead.

Except Babs Seed.

Babs Seed can go to hell.

So I have all right in the world to write this pointless crap.

Also, it's not like I haven't been put into crudely drawn gay orgy MS Paint pictures featuring Hitler and co. before, so... yeah. Rape fics with zombies wouldn't exactly be original either.

WHERE'S YOUR ALL-CAPS/ALL-BOLD GOD NOW??

2821751
FUCK YOU I KNOW ALL OF THEM BY HEART

2821764 i.qkme.me/36fsqr.jpg

This. OMG. DO MORE OF THIIIISS!

2821764
houseofchocolate.co.nz/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/smashed-dark-chocolate.jpg
I will smash the living chocolate out of you and bake you into Nutella!

2821847
We two should totally create a society against spirals in liquid chocolate!

Also, I'm starting to wonder if Kaidan has mail notifications disabled... Spam all the way!

2821955 So.. Are we against spirals IN liquid chocolate, or are we against spirals whilst inside liquid chocolate?

Rarity is best troll.
static2.fjcdn.com/comments/And+_08ea20088feae584cd69018af85802ac.png

Love it. This stuff is my fetish
Also, Rarity and Fluttershy are a cute couple!

2822205
One of these fine bitches:
3.bp.blogspot.com/-nG8nrfnQ5W8/T4ZQ8v7_-2I/AAAAAAAAG8w/N8px9fy0OVw/s200/Chocolate+Swirl+Walp+long+goodbye.png

Though, rating by CS's avatar, only if it has parrots in it.

2820920
Yes Panda.

Shattered Prism Five should be my next update, followed by other stuff randomly while I work off and on to finalize "Dollhouse II."

2821939
After Shattered Prism Five, I am considering showing each of the mane six in self-bondage, or maybe some other type of "serious" bondage clop.

2820258
Silly Fluttershy should have planned ahead :)

2821277
Sex is everyone's thing! And some of us those ponies have to do it all alone.

2821751
If I came into work on time, I wouldn't have that extra 30 minutes of sleep when I fall asleep around 4am.

2821764
And that's why you're best commentor

2822242
I agree with everything: Ropes, self-bondage, and Flarity pairing are all the best.

2822385MOTHERBUCKIN' YAY

2821847 Kaidan says I'm best commentator. Love me.

2822256
FUCK YOU IF YOU LAY A HAND ON MY PARROT I WILL TEAR THE EVER LOVING SHIT OUT OF YOU WITH A GUARD GOOSE WHILE MY DOG SITS ON YOUR FACE AND THEN I'LL SHOOT FIREWORKS INTO YOUR EYES YOU ASS

2822544
I tried to write a fitting response, but my browser said:
"Sorry, you need to climb up to Level 24 before you can use No punctuation and Uber caps."

Also, your imagination of torture is quite questionable.

2822608
Oh, me next!

http://sketchtoy.com/42947584

I've been bad and should be tortured too.

You, author person. I like this Flarity you write. You will produce more.

2822681
This is one of these 'Mom Pictures'. You know, those that apparently trigger something in your parents' brain and make them go "HEY I SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK OUT WHAT MY SON IS DOING RIGHT NOW FOR ABSOLUTELY NO FUCKING REASON!". And then they burst into your room without knocking while the page loads. Not that I can blame it on you though.

Also, my religion is Michael Bay: Everything is better with explosions (and bad mouse hand writing).