Shepherd hums a bit as he gets up from bed. He walks into the bathroom, and examines his face. He then pulls out a toothbrush, some toothpaste and begins to brush his teeth.

Shepherd: "Hrr hrr... Hrrr..."

It feels... Strangely tingly. He leans in to look at his teeth... And sees tiny, mite-like creatures skittering all over his pearly whites.

Outside...

Shepherd: "GYYAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

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A number of events in the series will be butterflied away thanks to Shepherd being around. Among other things...

The Storm King's mighty airship approaches Canterlot...

Storm King: "Yes... Soon, all of Equestria will fall before me and be laid waste-"

And the much larger USS Enterprise CV-6, flying the colors of the Royal Equestrian Navy, loomed into view.

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Twilight: "Hey Shepherd! How was your meeting with the Princess?"

Shepherd: "Pretty exhausting, but productive. I had to spend the night though: Geez, you guys gotta invent cars. And roads. Or flying cars."

Twilight: "Dash thinks you're sleeping with the Princess, you know."

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Shepherd is in Twilight's lab again...

Shepherd: "Do we have to keep doing this, Twilight?"

Twilight: "You are literally the only human I have! The only human on this entire planet! You evolved in an ecosystem without any magic! You are completely unique!"

Shepherd: "Says the magic alicorn."

Twilight: "Well, that's not very unique on this planet! You are! So we need to examine you as you continue to adapt to our environment!"

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Twilight: "Hello Shepherd! What's that smell?"

Shepherd: "Well, given you need more calories as an alicorn, I thought I'd whip you up some Earth foods packed with energy!"

Twilight: "Oh, that is so sweet-What did you make?"

Shepherd: "A full Mexican platter! Tamales, tacos, and-"

Twilight: "QUESADILLAS?!"

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Shepherd was invited to a private party by Pinkie Pie. This wasn't really unusual. It was unusual for her to not be greeting him in whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles. Instead, she had a strange metal cylinder dressed up in a party hat.

Pinkie: "Hi Shepherd! Look who I found! Out in the dump of human artifacts! This is Mister Dantive!"

Shepherd: "Dantive?"

Pinkie: "Yeah! It's what's on his name tag!"

Shepherd examines the cylinder, wipes off some tape and gunk on the labels...

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Andrew somewhat reluctantly stepped into the library, having received a letter from Twilight asking for his presence.

The fact it was a letter, and she hadn’t just come over to talk to him, or asked somepony to speak to him next time they saw him, was slightly ominous. Either something official, or ‘hijinks’ were looming on the horizon.

Either way, he felt his trepidation was justified.

However, no one seemed present.

“Twilight? Spike? It’s Andrew. I came? About your letter?”

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Twilight: "You can't do this! The power of love will overcome your hatred! You love us like... Like Juliet loved Hamlet!"

Discord!Shepherd: "My love is irrelevant and Juliet didn't love Hamlet! She loved Romeo!"

Pinkie: "Ohhh! Right! Hamlet loved Helen of Troy!"

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I was tempted to write a flashback to when Shepherd was in Canterlot. It would show that, no matter how thirsty mares in Ponyville might be over him... The mares in Canterlot were worse.

A unicorn maid grins lustily as she seals the doors and windows.

Shepherd: "Ummm... I kind of need to get to breakfast with the Princess. So if you would please-?"

Maid: "Give me a bushel of foals you hot alien stud, you!"

Shepherd: "... Okay there's been some miscommunication here-"

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Shining: "You know... Shepherd, I know it's a tall order but I want you to date my sister."

Shepherd: "I... Wha?"

Shining: "You've been keeping her from destroying the planet. We're clearly going to need you to keep doing that."

Shepherd: "That's going to be a full time job!"

Shining: smiles "There are a lot of perks and benefits?"

Shepherd: "In other words it's way too good to be true, like any dream job."

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Next they come across some timberwolves, that are blocking the only way across a river.

Shepherd: "Hmm... We need to get past them, but how?"

Shining: "Fighting them would just draw more of them down on us, so we need a way to distract them."

Shining was already plotting.

Shepherd: "Yeah but how?"

Shining shoves Shepherd into the open with his telekinesis. The timberwolves all look hungrily at the human as he hangs from the smug Shining's hoof via chains.

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Shining and Shepherd have... Problems. They're fighting a lot. So the mares hatch a plan: Get both of them drunk, hand/hooffcuff them to each other then dump them on some distant island or desert.

Then watch as they're forced in Buddy cop movie style to work together and develop a begrudging trust and respect for each other in their misadventures to return to Equestria.

- - -

Shining: "All right... If we fell this tree trunk we can cross this gorge... But we'll need an axe."

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Twilight groaned as she read through the latest form she had to review. She drooped deeply as her tired eyes focused on the lines of the text... But they were beginning to swim before her.

"Nnnngh... No... Gotta keep... Going," she mumbled.

Shepherd sighed and picked Twilight up. She began to squirm.

"Nnnnoooo! Let me go! I have work to dooo..." Twilight moaned. Shepherd shook his head and carried her to her bedroom. He kicked open the door, walked in, and set her down on her bed.

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Shepherd went out with Pinkie Pie to hear one of Maud Pie's stand up routines. Pinkie was as excited as she ever was, practically bouncing up and down in her chair. Shepherd sat in the other chair, a bit cramped given it was built for a pony, but he tried to be as comfortable as possible.

Shepherd: "So, Maud's a stand up comic?"

Pinkie: "Oh yeah! She's hilarious! You'll love her!"

Shepherd: "Well, I'll give it a shot."

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Twilight: "Come on, come on! Hurry up!"

Shepherd: cooking up the bacon "Geez, be patient Twi! Come on!"

Twilight: "Sorry... It's just so amazing... I can smell it and the meat is so amazing...!"

Shepherd: "Here." He sets it on a plate in front of her

Twilight: "Thank you!" She bites down... Chews... Bites and eats some more... "Oh no...!"

Shepherd: "What? Is it not good?"

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Of course I might try something different with Discord.

Discord: "So, you think you're smarter than me? More creative than me?!"

Shepherd: "Not a high bar! I could do your job better without breaking a sweat!"

Discord: "Why don't we put that to the test, hm?"

He shoves his fingers into Shepherd's head. The human screams. One of his eyes turns yellow, half his body turns gray and dull... and he grins.

Discord!Shepherd: "Huh! Well that's new..."

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Shepherd and Twilight talked at length about the situation, and Twilight promised to be supportive of any decision he made. Though she was still hoping it would be her. She was at the very least honest and restrained, so he really appreciated that about her.

She was learning so much. Honestly she had grown up, and he'd helped her. It made him feel very fond of her. Almost as fond as-

Shepherd: "Oh shit."

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Tea Time at Twilight's Palace...

Fluttershy: "You know Twilight, you've been spending a lot of time on reforming villains."

Twilight: "Well, what can I say? You inspired me! With the work you did with Discord! Now he's... Completely... Devoted to you..."

Fluttershy: deadpan "Twilight. No."

Twilight: "I-I didn't do-I'm not doing anything!"

Fluttershy: "I know you! You're going to concoct some kind of... Crazy scheme!"

Twilight: "Am not!"

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Shepherd: "Princess Celestia, I need to ask you a question."

Celestia: "By all means, my knight. Ask away."

Shepherd: "It... Seems kind of weird that a lot of mares find me... You know... Attractive. As in sexually. I am a completely different species, after all."

Celestia: "Well, outside of the fact you are brave and a hero of Equestria."

Shepherd: "Yes, outside of that."

Celestia: "And your hands are delightful to be touched with."

Shepherd: "Okay, sure-"

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