I'm looking for proofreading of my fallout equestria story. I am thinking of rewriting the first 5 to 6 chapters, I want them to be longer words and flow better, feedback and ideas would be very welcome

Would that be "Fallout Equestria shattered memories"? From just a glance, I would say that there's a problem with wanting them to be longer in number of words; more words alone isn't better.