So in case you've been living under a giant pony plushie like a big baby loser, you might be surprised to learn that the final chapter of FailOut:Equestria - Project Whore-izons came out not long ago, and now it's been dropped onto FimFic like a big, stinky turd so all the scrubs can gather around and make it hug the feature box for a whole year... which is mostly because that's how long it's going to take Somber to upload every single chapter. There's like a million of them, and each one is really really long. Sometimes they sidetrack a little, and sometimes things just completely go off the main plot, but hey, at least you get to to know about all of the author's headcanons and stuff.

Of course, the main reason the story is so long is because Sombrero knew you kiddies might get bored while reading so many words all at once, so he made sure to put in all the stupid memes and funny references from anime and Meme Fortress 2 and vidya gaems. Now yeah, it took up a lot of space, but at least now you can have a good laugh while reading an ultra-violent gorefest that takes place in a nuclear wasteland.

But if funny jokes aren't quite enough for you, Projector Ozone also has a huuuuge list of interesting characters to show you as you follow this really super long story that no one cares about. So in case you thought the original Fallout:Equestria didn't have enough canon characters pointlessly shoehorned into the story, usually into roles that don't fit their characters at all, then this fic ups the ante by a whole bajillion. Wow, it's just so amazing... Rainbow Dash survived as a ghoul who dresses up as Mare Do Well in the cloud city, and Twilight secretly had a kid with Big Macintosh when she wasn't busy making superweapons? Who could have seen that coming?

What's that? Still not enough? We're over 10 million words here, and you still need more? Well, this fic also teaches you valuable lessons about a ton of things in life that you'll need to be a good person. You gotta remember to, uh... eat your veggies, drink lots of Nuka Cola, lots of healing drugs... and be sure to cure the trauma of sexual assault by having sex with complete strangers.

He lowered his mouth to his chalkboard and wrote briefly, not taking his eyes off my swaying tail. ‘U sure?’

“Yeah. I am. If you’re still interested?” I asked, half hoping he’d changed his mind. But he swallowed and nodded. I closed my eyes and bowed my head. “You know what happened to me, though… so, if I tell you to stop… please stop. Okay? For both our sakes.”

He approached till he was right behind me, then wrote something else as he blushed profusely. ‘Virgin’, it read, and he smiled sheepishly.

“Well… you can start by touching me,” I murmured softly as I closed my eyes. Don’t kill him… don’t kill him. I want this. I really do.

(Actual quote from chapter 44)

So that's Project Horizons! It was a long road, but now that I know Blackjack dies at the end in a scene that rips off pays homage to Terminator 2, I know I can die happy. Be sure to read it and give all your love!

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and Twilight secretly had a kid with Big Macintosh when she wasn't busy making superweapons?

Have I mentioned that I'm quitting this shack?

I'm quitting this shack if THIS is what you imbeciles intend to expose me to.