Hi, everypony, Twilight here. I seem to have misplaced my fax machine, Spike. (Honestly I had no idea he was gone until Rarity informed me.) Well, it's time to forget that old Spike and assume that he is dead, because logic tells us that he is (obviously) and just get a new one.

I need somepony else to become our new Spikey-Wikey to help out once more. (Yes, I know, another post like this, but now that we have a Rarity, we need a Spike!!!)

If you'd like to be our new fax machine Spike, details are here.

JOBS:
1. Troll around forums and see if there is spam (if there is, lock the thread and inform them why it is locked, preferably in a PM or reply to the comment)
2. Make sure nopony is breaking any rules!
3. Finding stories and placing them in the correct folders
4. Becoming our new fax machine Spike!
5. Self-promotion where needed
6. Answering questions
7. Being my personal assistant!

REWARDS:
1. 10 cents an hour
2. minimum wage
3. Adminship!

If you'd like to be my new fax machine Spike, answer these questions below!

1. How often can you be on, trolling the forums and keeping the group in your daily rounds?
2. Are you willing to do stuff as mentioned above in the jobs?
3. Are you okay with minimum wage?
4. Are you fine being bossed around by yours truly?
5. Do you have experience?
6. Do you promise to be a faithful fax machine Spike?

All righty! That's all!
~Twilight

PS I eagerly await my new fax machine Spike!

3142682 Well, Spike is best pone. Alright.
1: Pretty often. If I'm not, it's because I'm doing a commission.
2: I suppose so, not a prob.
3: Only need women.
4: Sure.
5: Nope. But people generally like me, so that's alright.
6: Sure.

3142682 Spike must also try on all my new dresses before I sell them!

3142880 I thought it was Sweetie Belle that had to?

3142891 She's not around enough, to much crusading Spike is always willing to do stuff for me!

3142899 Does that mean, she'll be able to crusade more?

3142901 Doesn't she already crusade enough?

3142914 No, there hounds of things we can do to get our cutie marks.

3142880 Oh, Spike abuse.

3142937 More like, Spike Reuse!

3142940

3142951 Aww don't be sad darling! he doesn't mind

3142977 well, he wouldn't show it.

3142986 I'm sure he is perfectly fine with it

3142880
That shouldn't be a problem. But only after he does all of his chores. Otherwise, the fax machine dragon will think he runs the place.

3142682

For the jobs part:

1. I can be on very often, almost a whole day at times.

2. Hell, anyone can do that.

3. That's gonna be tricky, but I might be able to do so.

4. ... Isn't that the bloody point?

5. Eeeeeeeehhh...

6. Yeah.

7. See #4.

Answers to questions:

1. See #1 above.

2. As long as it's reasonable and not overwhelming, I don't need to become overly anxious.

3. Eh, yeah.

4. As long as it's fair. Treat me as an equal.

5. Yes.

6. ... Refer to #4 in the first portion of this response.

3142682

1. How often can you be on, trolling the forums and keeping the group in your daily rounds?

I'm on basicly 24/7

2. Are you willing to do stuff as mentioned above in the jobs?

Yeah.

3. Are you okay with minimum wage?

Yeah.

4. Are you fine being bossed around by yours truly?

Yeah.

5. Do you have experience?

I am an admin of;
Humans In Equestria
Human on Royalty
Humans are Bastards
Beings with Superpowers
Anime Crossovers
Cheese Pie
Adventures - AU
Tons and tons of various other small groups

6. Do you promise to be a faithful fax machine Spike?

Yeah.

3142682 weeping!! Pick me!!

1. I'm online constantly, the only time I don't answer is if I'm with a customer at work, but as soon as I'm done, I'm checking fim

2. Yes, so long as we don't make an "owlowiscious" position, then I'll kinda go nuts.

3. All I need is your friendship.

4. That is why I can be your number 1 assistant!

5. I'm an Admin for "The Pleasant Commentator and review group" and I'm very good at maintaining order when asked to. I'm also awesome. And sometimes when no one is looking I get in front of a mirror and do this

"Looking good Tidal, looking real good"

6. Of course! You have to promise never to send me away!

3142977 I will try on all these dresses.

Because no pony even comes to close to having your beauty... And grace... And sophistication... *sigh*

I can be your Number One assistant!

3142682
1. I am always on at all hours of the day and night literally.
2. Absolutly!
3. I will work for FREE.
4. Your wish is my command
5. Tons of it.
6. I will be your element of loyalty!

3144168 Well, isn't it obvious, I am the fairest of the land.

3144694 absolutely no doubt!

3142682 No offense twilight.. Lol

3144777 *flips mane and walks away fabulously*

I am getting to into this role I think

3142682
I don't remember telling you that Spike died!!! Aw, man! Fluttershy's gonna be PISSED with your awful guardian skills, Twi!

Oh, crap! If she hears what you did to Owlowisious, she's gonna be FURIOUS!!!

TWILIGHT, GET OVER HERE!!!
I- if you don't mind that is...

Uh-- GOTTA GO, SORRY TWI!!

3144902 *Hearts out of me and carries me after you*

I don't even have the job and I'm doing that, lol

3142682
Wait, Spike died? How am Ah s'posed t' get messages t' Apple Bloom now?! An' how do y' get another one? Changlin's?

((I have no clue how this is supposed to work. I have an idea, but I'm kind of confused.))

3144856
Well then.

*makes mental note*

Yup, Tidal's out...

JK. I'm still in decision-making mode.

3144938
Oh crap! SPIKE! GO KILL FLUTTERSHY!

3144902
And in this moment I am very glad I picked you
*claps*

3144168
That was a laugh...
Good job, Tidal. I think you are a good contender...

3145178
(I need an assistant. Plus Sky Dance-er, Rarity- told me it would be a good idea. I'll just choose mah assistant and it will be okay)

Don't worry, AJ! Once I get another one, then you'll be able to walk over him!

3145186 ok...

I'll just sit here...

And wait

3145178 remember when the old Spike was helping you because you saved his life, that was absolutely Dreadful, I was so lonely without my Spikey-Wikey.

It's not even like you needed the help anyways, unless of course, you were to busy acting like a ruffian to get any actual work done

3145566

Funny, seeing who's talking

3151006 I do not run around in fields all day, I do, in fact get my dresses done for everyone, do not accuse me of something I am not- you BRUTE!

3151061

Hehehe... Who makes the dragon do all the gem hunting? Who makes Spike carry everything wherever she goes?

You. Manehattan, Spike had to carry all those suitcases. It's a miracle they didn't collapse and asphyxiate him.

3151928 Do you really expect a lady to carry all that? Pfft, you are just jealous because you don't have a personal dragon to help you with everything

3151977 I've got a party cannon!!! It fits right in my mane, he he! I can load all of your shiny-fancy stuff into it if you want, Rarity! But they may or may not get blown up when I need to party. BUT LOOK!!! I brought cupcakes! They stay nice and toasty in the ol' cannon-cupcake-compartment!

3152214 ah, Pinkie um, that's absolutely wonderful dear.

3152217
You really think so?! That's GREAT!!! I'll just need to reshelf the party bombs because they are REALLY fragile. And when Twilight gets her brand new Spike, then I'll have him squeeze in and clean up the place! Until then, you may want to excuse the frosting. Heh. Bon-Bon really knows how to use a party cannon!

3152239 Twi already has a new Spike!

3152245 Oh, oh, oh! Sincewhensincewhen?!?!

TWILIGHT YOU NEVER TOOOLD MEEE!!!

Whoisitwhoisit?!

3152260
3144168 < him, he flattered me!

3152267
HOORAY FOR TIDAL!!!
err
SPIKE!!!
I threw him a party.

3152270 That's wonderful!

3152273
HOOORAY!!!!

Maud showed up for Spike's closet party!

I KNEW SHE WOULD!!!!

3152270 Whoa! A party for me! Gee Pinkie you didn't have to do such a nice thing!
But, remind me again how cool I am?

Wait I have to clean it all up? Figures...

3152273 Sigh, at least Rarity is here, maybe after I'm done cleaning up this mess, I can go clean up her place!

*Starts to dance with broom, imagining it's Rarity*

3152301
Spike you're NOT cool...

YOU'RE THE COOLEST!!!!

3152312 Alllllright!

*whispers* be sure to mention that to Twilight, it seems from time to time she forgets just how awesome I really am!

3152328
Will do!!!

TWIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!