First things first, the minute I saw the Dark tag, I expected something completely different to happen within this story. Usually when I see such a tag, death is involved and I tend to skip stories with such a tag. Why? I hate stories with character deaths when they are not handled properly, and I’ve been scarred by far too many “bad” stories to try and find “good” ones. I’ve been emotionally traumatized by such stories in the past, and-

Moving on...

Okay, the two main characters have never met before and do battle? Not bad: the scenes are painted vividly, as are the characters? Very nice indeed; the sex...

Wow.

I’ve read a lot of clop on this site, likely more than is healthy for a human, but... that is one of the best I’ve read in terms of a combination of quality, length and realism. I don’t know how you did it, but in my book this stories ranks up there with the people on this site who take commissions for this sort of work.

Jeez, I feel inferior now with what I’ve written.

Anyway, minor plot twist at the end notwithstanding (did not see it coming at all), this was a very good story. My only gripe (not so much a gripe as an observation) is that the “fight” seemed a tad... short. Even a few more paragraphs could have made it a tiny bit more realistic in my opinion, but hey; it still balanced the story out just fine.

All in all, I quite liked it, and in time, I’m sure more people will find and read this. Good luck on your continued writing success, author.

2798399

Thank you for the review!

I've taken all pointers into account, and I'll be sure to give the fight scene a bit of an extension. I'll be sure to add my next clop story to this group as well.

Thanks again!