Review of Crisis of Infinite Offspring by dramatic_spoon

Review of the writing of this story

Execution/Presentation

This story starts out moving at a fast pace, not lingering in the opening scenes as Big Mac goes on a date. Once the setup is complete, however, we get into a gripping storyline that drops laughs through sheer absurdity.

As you read Crisis of Infinite Offspring, you’ll be constantly switching from “I want a backstory on this character!” to laughing, chuckling, or chortling, depending on how receptive to comedy you are.

Mood

This fic could have easily been of a variety of moods, including dark or epic. However, the author keeps everything light and breezy, at the same time as engaging our imaginations in thoughts of parallel universes. The author is consistent, so you won’t be feeling bipolar five chapters in.

Grammar

I would give this story a grade B on the grammar scale. Most errors are superficial, with a few odd capitalizations, misplaced punctuation, and words in strange places. A quick proofread should solve these issues.

I would note that as the story progresses, the grammar gets better. Practice makes perfect, as I like to say!

TIPS

Proofread your story, and try reading it aloud before publishing a chapter. You’ll find a lot of things that made sense when you wrote them might have to be changed when you see it from a reader’s point of view. Even still, you may miss a few things, so don’t be afraid to come back and improve your story after a while.

OFFICIAL RATING

{I recommend this story}

I did enjoy this story, and would probably have given it a fave while it was still being written. That said, my personal criteria for a fave is something with a deeply interesting storyline, which you just won’t see in a comedy as light-hearted as this one. It really comes down to your own personal tastes.

Critical Review

Crisis of Infinite Offspring is a comedy at the expense of Big Macintosh, as young colts and fillies from alternate realities appear, all claiming to be the offspring of the big guy himself. The madness begins almost immediately as Big Mac desperately seeks to return the children to their real parents.

Although this story has some obvious grammatical errors in its earlier chapters, the quality of writing improves as the story progresses, a common occurrence in amateur fiction. I would suggest another run-through by the author to weed out these issues.

As you read Crisis of Infinite Offspring, you will find yourself wishing that a story could be written for some of the more interesting and unlikely results of Big Mac’s multiversal matrimonies. At least one of the alternate realities could spawn a Dark fic, with others creating boundless opportunities for Adventure and Slice-of-Life stories. My own suggestion to the author: Create a ‘Verse for this! I would definitely read works about the lives of Big Mac’s infinite children.

Summary: Big Macintosh is haunted by his children from alternate realities as he seeks to return them to their real mothers (and fathers).

websterhamster Rating: 8/10

Take Two! I won't delete it this time, I promise.

2761301

For the record, I actually have done a few background stories, mostly with Stratos and his universe.

2761318 I can't wait to read them!

2761324

Well, I put the story in the "Waiting for Review" folder.
but on the off-chance you aren't the one that gets to review it, Here's a Link.