6399732 Why can't you just stick to one avatar?

6399732
Who are you?

6399781
who can do that?

6399795
https://youtu.be/tqrqaPThCmI?t=7

6399833 Do you like chocolate?

6399896
I do, though that had nothing to do with making the name. I like the food (when utilized well, that is), such as in Oreos, chocolate chips, cake, etc. I like girls with chocolate or milk chocolate skin, I like actual chocolate on the skin-- alright, I think that's enough about liking chocolate..

6400174 Are you loco?

6400927
that depends on how you look at it

6400944 What do you live for?

6401268
part of me wants to say "excellence". another part of me wants to say "the sake of living". so, perhaps both?

6401302 If you had to choose between two pills. The green one would make you immortal and you wouldn't be able to die for eternity no matter what. The red pill would kill you on the spot. You would have to choose one of them and you wouldn't have any alternative option. Which one would you pick?

6401371
when you ask me this question, are you telling me that:
1) I must swallow the pill I choose and allow it to take effect
2) I can't refuse to choose a pill
3) I can't delay this situation, or cannot leave until a pill is chosen

?

in that case, I would immediately swallow the green pill. the first thing I would do after that is join the army.
edit: if not, let me know otherwise

6401400 Yes, the conditions are as you stated them. What would you do 5 billion years from now when the Sun will be turning into a red giant, soon to devour the Earth and the last rocket just left Earth, leaving you stranded on a doomed planet?

6401423
I'd play a role similar to Dr. Doom and Robert Edwin House. hopefully, before then, we'd have perfected artificial life

6401483 What were their roles? Did they also bake in the middle of the Sun?

What good would artificial life do? When entropy wins, all those robots will just be a lifeless pile. It'll just be you, floating in the cold space until you get sucked into a black hole. That's when the Hell begins for you.

6402042
I don't know a great deal about Dr. Doom, but it's been stated, canonically, that the only futures in which humanity doesn't suffer are the ones in which he is leading it. regarding House, he is biologically immortal due to science. his goal is to lead humanity to prosperity, and for him that starts by exploring space and looking for a suitable planet to move humanity from the atomically war-torn Earth to somewhere more suitable. I know nothing of his plans from that point.

I would assume humanity could help me overcome this problem in various ways. numerous fields of science exist. for example, if it were impossible for them to overcome that problem, then another solution is introduced. as I said before, 5 billion years is a very long time. I argue that I'd definitely have answers of all kinds given just 500,000 years.

6402758 Do you believe there is always a solution to a problem? Could a problem exist that couldn't be solved?

6402808
no. I just think the world is vast enough that something satisfactory could be created by humanity, given enough time

6403207 A black hole is scheduled to suck in our solar system a thousand years from now. Would you really be 100% that humans would find a solution until then?

6403212
what. just one thousand years from now? I don't even know if I'd have control of the world in a thousand years

6403246 Do you always have to control something before you can start to trust it? How would you feel as a passenger on a plane?

6403257
controlling something doesn't make it trustworthy. I control my keyboard. the space button is currently sunk in. where I input one space, there may be two or three spaces; where I input none, there may be one. I know that I trust things other than facts, but facts are the only trustworthy thing.

I would rather not have to deal with a plane. not much safety if it goes down. if the airport runs out of money, I'm stuck where they land. you have to go through all of that shit just to ride on one. TSA may fuck with you. you cough too hard or say anything that sounds like "bomb", you won't be having a good time. if I had to fly, I'd do everything I could to make it as painless as possible.

6404098 What other things besides facts do you trust?

6404115
I dunno. what else is reliable?

6405456 If it's not a fact, it's just a probability, IMO.

What is your life's goal and how many years are you off from achieving it?

6405564
I don't have one. I thought I did, but I don't. I don't know how to "have one". picking something and working towards it doesn't seem to work. nothing I attempt to pick actually matters to me, and the things I pick by accident are just too assailable

6405738 What was the one you thought you had?

6405827
it's too complicated for me to describe simply. it was a lot of things jumbled into one. it could be ultimately described as "problem solver"

6405864 Why is that goal no longer viable?

6406188
when you have moments where you feel depressed enough to want to die, and that goal of yours doesn't even cross your mind as something you should discontinue, or you have no negative feelings about it (ex. "I can never do X"), etc., it likely doesn't even exist to you as a goal. not subconsciously.

6406255 So, you did it out of a habit, and now you're breaking the habit? Instead of the routine being in control of your life, you'll be the one taking charge of your life? Or are you going to succumb to your subconscious drives instead of the conscious decisions?

6406562
the point I attempted to make was it couldn't be embedded into my subconscious simply by working on it and caring for it, despite doing so for years and it being the main thing I focused on and cared about. it's not something I could be satisfied with doing, forever, doing only that.

the "habit" wasn't a habit. to ask me if I'll be taking charge of my life is to insist that something else wills this body of mine. the issue is not whether or not I "succumb to subconscious drives", but rather what does anything mean for me. I could no doubt do great things, if I took all the appropriate actions to get there. but what's the point of that if I literally don't want to do it?

I don't want to be a scientist. it would be interesting to delve in it, especially if I studied what I wanted. I don't want to be a lawyer, but I could be one. I don't want to be a soldier, and I shouldn't try now. I don't want to "be" a thing. I don't want to cure cancer. I don't strive to have my name written in a history book. I don't want to be some great hero. I want to live and not feel restricted.

6406742 I see. One can control one's actions, but not one's desires.

Do you have the luxury to pick your own destiny, or do you feel pressured to perform from the outside?

What are the things that you do enjoy doing? What gives you a sense of freedom?

6406983
I think you have some control over it via the game you pick. the more suitable the game, the more you want to participate in that game.; your desires could be controlled that way.

technically, I still have that luxury, but I don't know what to do with it. I shrug off pressure. in fact, to people who try to put pressure on me, I tend to show them how unaffected I am by it immediately afterwards.

flirting with interesting girls, playing video games, some sort of physical activity (maybe martial arts? never tried), thinking, learning things I can make use of immediately, doing things on a level others can't. money, learning, ability, skills, free time.

6407021 But the desire comes first when picking a game. It determines which game is suitable and which is not. By picking a game, you already demonstrate your obedience to your desires.

Do you think picking a goal might be relatable to picking what type of story you want to write? You could write a novel or a one-shot. Perhaps, the hobbies you stated could be considered as one-shots. Do you think an author is obliged to write a novel in order to be considered a writer? What if you are the kind of writer who shines at one-shots? What if the things that bring you joy are the meaning of life, and not some grand scheme out in the future?

6407030
not so sure of that. I think by virtue of being human and alive, you pick them and play them. it's unavoidable. though, some games are more appealing to some people. I think playing games is just what you do, and picking one isn't a sign of obedience. on the contrary, sometimes you pick games you want nothing to do with, but have to deal with it. war, for instance.

I don't know what to do with that. in my mind, it makes sense to me that "people only enjoy novels", yet I know that to even type that is ridiculous. people like one-shots. maybe this is my thing. I've never thought about it. or, maybe I'm just too impatient to do a novel... or lack the ability to do so, currently, so I practice novels? 🤷

6407217 If you pick a game, there must be a reason for that. I believe that reason is usually your desire. Different people like different games because they have different desires. And if the game picks you, that's just a whole different ballgame. You can't do much about that. We're either slaves to our desires or slaves to necessity.

Albert Einstein sucked at water ballet. Does that mean he should have practiced it more? I think not. Play to your strengths, not your weaknesses. If one-shots are your thing, then why the hell are you trying to write a novel? You're sacrificing potential glorious one-shots for something that may never be noteworthy since you lack the patience to devote all your free time to it.

Should Albert Einstein be miserable because he can't dance in the water? I think not. He was one of the best at what he did, and he did what he enjoyed doing. So why would you be miserable for not shining at something you're not even drawn toward? Why would you not be happy for enjoying the things you enjoy? You already know what brings you joy, so what's the problem?

6407285
ultimately, yes. but I'm not sure that can be called "being obedient to your desires". for one, there are all sorts of desires, and often times some of them conflict. for example, if desires A and B conflict, and you choose B, what are you being obedient to? you could call it "being obedient to your desires" if you couldn't ever choose between A and B (and thus, it could be recognized as a poor way to live), but the moment you choose A or B, that diagnosis should change.

I disagree to a certain extent. many people suck at many things before they practice regularly and become good at it. for example, children can enter school at the earliest ages not knowing how to read or write, but then they learn it. strengths can be developed and enhanced, and weaknesses can be eliminated or diminished. there are some strengths that cannot be possessed, and some weaknesses that can't be eliminated. though when you look at potentiality, this is a different argument. for example, Mike Tyson was a boxer with a pretty big weakness: a glass jaw. but when he was first scouted out for this, he was seen as having powerful advantages otherwise. he had great potential as well. rather than discard him due to his jaw, his trainers developed a boxing guard specifically for him to use and developed him as a fighter so that it was difficult to attack his chin directly. due to this, in the majority of his fights, it was as if he didn't have that weakness at all. I believe I told you that before, too. for reasons like this, I think that a thing should be judged in its entirety -- its current effectiveness vs its potential effectiveness -- in order to assess it accurately. if Tyson were judged on his current effectiveness, he probably wouldn't have been chosen, which would be a grand mistake due to his potentiality.

anyway. I think I misstyped. I don't know why I said "so I practice novels?". I don't "practice novels". I haven't practiced anything. to more accurately reflect my own personal situation, I don't know how to "utilize myself" to get what I want, in a way where I shine brightly. I could "write a one-shot". I could "write a novel", so long as I understand the process to do so. how do I make a life out of that? it's not that I think I'm built particularly built for one or the other. I think I could easily do either. it's just I don't know what particular way to get involved in that that would be satisfying for me. what I think is that I am lost, and I don't see the way to live my life as myself. ex. many people in life are specialists, how am I to live as a "generalist" if there is such a way? am I even classifiable as a "generalist"? the ultimate question: what suits me and would make me happy?

6407357 If you choose the desire A over the desire B, it might be because one is bigger than the other. It's like having two masters. If they order you different things, you're probably going to obey the one you consider superior to the other. Unless you actively defy both masters, you're, at least to some extent, giving credence to their authority.

When presenting yourself, it's still better to play to your strengths. Even with Tyson example, he wasn't training his chin. He actively tried to avoid playing his weakness. Some things you're talented for and enjoy doing. Those are the things you should focus on. The things that you'll never be able to excel are not worth your time unless they're bound to your life.

You already know the things you enjoy doing. Why not do those? Imagine a rabbit who stacked his den with various vegetables. Why should the rabbit stay hungry? All the food it has is enjoyable for the rabbit. There's no reason for the rabbit to stay hungry. Why should the rabbit keep seeking out other food if it already has enough? With the time it wastes seeking new foods, the rabbit stays hungry and the food in the den just goes to waste. Perhaps, the same could be said about your life. Every moment you spend seeking other things instead of doing the things you enjoy doing is a moment wasted.

If you had everything, would you still seek out more?

6407576
but A and B are both "desire". to choose to defy one in place of the other is no longer giving credence to "desire", but to "desire A" or "desire B".

it's not easy to see what you'll never be able to excel at, or define what you could be good at with certainty, even with unusual talent/absence of ability. especially in those fields where rules don't restrict you. what do you do when you don't enjoy what you're talented for, or you're talented for something you're unaware of whether or not it even exists?

Albert Einstein could enjoy receiving blowjobs from young women. he wouldn't make money doing it. but more to the point, your food analogy would be more accurate if it were stated that the rabbit's body doesn't know what it can and can't eat. imagine being a rabbit that has to eat rocks, or meat, but its mouth doesn't water when it sees a carcass or a rock. the only way you'd know (as the rabbit) is by trying to eat it. suppose you still feel nothing, even as you taste it. then you have to figure it out via digestion. but on the bright side, you can live for many decades without eating anything.

"everything" sounds like it encompasses more than I could possibly be directly conscious of, or enjoy/make use of. it also sounds as if there exists nothing outside of it. do people normally seek out that which they know can't exist?

6407890 You can desire A and B. But since you can't fulfill both, you choose the one you desire the most. It's like having a shopping list on which it says: 'milk', and you find out that they have different shades of milk in the store. You'll buy just one kind of milk, but your list (desire) gets fulfilled just the same. Choosing does not negate fulfilling.

You're right about the trickiness of finding your calling. I guess it's best to just get a taste of everything and see what works out.

For some reason, people have the desire to be needed. Being good at something oftentimes relates to being needed for that thing. Usually, people enjoy the things they excel at and hate the things they suck at. Either way, from one's perspective, the best thing to do is follow what is enjoyable.

If Albert Einstein enjoyed blowjobs more than science, we wouldn't know who he was. He followed science, not for money, but because of his passion that must have been greater than the passion for blowjobs.

I think the rabbit analogy still works. You know what the things you enjoy are. You listed them. The things you enjoy are the things that bring you joy.

If you suddenly became a god and had ultimate power and could turn back time and create worlds from nothingness, what would be the thing that you'd go do? You can go do anything you like, time is on your side.

I find myself ever more convinced, that it's not the goal that brings people joy, but the journey. Take rich people for example. Some of them had a goal to become rich, and they achieved that goal. yet, they strive to get richer still.

So, be careful what you wish for. If you find a goal you can achieve, you might find yourself empty after the finish line.

Do you ever get bored? If not, you might not even have a problem. If I quote the latest episode, "Perhaps you should be doing what you've been doing all along."

6408144
I thought of it as like deciding whether you will buy orange juice or Pop Tarts, because you don't have enough money for both. although I understand now that buying one or the other could be considered "giving allegiance to breakfast items".

hard to get that taste, too, depending on what it is.

I'm not sure of that. ex. there may be people good at things they hate.

I like to think of it more as he wouldn't have any money if that was his passion.

the details? somewhat. the method to string them together? no clue.

weird question. if I had ultimate power, I would be omnipotent. if I were omnipotent, then no power is out of my reach; I could also become omniscient. every answer I've thought to come up with would be removed if I were omniscient. here are those instances:

duel Miyamoto Musashi to the death, repeatedly, until I win? repeat that scenario, but use strange weapons (ex. a pistol, grenades, bare hands, rope -- one of these, separately, each battle). see if I as a single man could defeat an entire nation? first, one of the past, then one of the future. weapons may change. after getting bored of that? assuming I succeed in both those challenges, perhaps create a more powerful opponent. randomly make a few people in the world omniscient, especially those considered to be idiots, to see what happens. look into the distant future, those unaltered by my newfound godlike powers, to see what the world is like, and learn why. hmm.. have a few different universes for omniscience purposes: one where every human is omniscient, one where all life as it occurs in current day 2018 is omniscient, one where only all animals aside from humans are omniscient, etc. discover the ultimate power source and utilize it. attempt to determine both the ultimate weapon and defense within the universe, and then see how they do against each other. currently, I think that destruction would overcome any possible defense, since all defensive options I recognize require some sort of reaction or state of being in order to interfere with the offense (ex. armor, parry, cover). also, often times, that defensive mechanism lacks any protection itself and can be destroyed, eliminating that defense. one thing that would interest me is to make a universe, one where a few people gains some great amount of power, and one where everyone in current day 2018 gains some great amount of power. in either case, lesser than my own (ex. "omnipotent", but without the ability to affect me or make themselves able to, or overrule decisions that I make, etc.) to see what happens. a lot of it is just to see what happens. these things interest me and are what come to mind out of the top of my head.

of course it's the journey. the journey strengthens you towards that end and you learn that there are things you can do that you either couldn't before or didn't know that you could. I know this well through gaming. for example, in Dark Souls, it's a pretty easy thing to cheat and receive the weapons and armor you want, all upgraded to their maximum possible. if you do this early on, you slaughter nearly everything without resistance. if you're good at the game, you pretty much do that anyway, but early on you don't even have to be careful because there's no way in hell they're gonna kill you. it becomes very boring, very fast. I've done similarly in my Fallout: New Vegas with mods challenge.

I am extremely careful of what I wish for, thanks to understanding and considering the consequences of such. no.. more likely, the possibilities after that has occurred. ex. rather than wish for "lots and lots of money" so I can be happy, wish to be happy. still, I do want to be rich -- not to be happy, but to be rich. I want to be happy too, though.

I do, at times, but nowhere near as much as it happened years ago. years ago, I would often say "I'm bored" every other minute. I don't understand what you've just told me -- I comprehend the words, but I don't understand how this is "what I should be doing all along".

6408198 There is an alternative to living for your desires. If you have a principle you live for and don't care what comes of your own life, then your own desires can be countered.

Do you ever lucid dream? I do. It's essentially like having ultimate power. I've tried everything I could think of. For me, it got kind of stale after a while. I'm not very stimulated when there's no challenge involved. Being all-powerful removes all of the challenges. Nowadays I sometimes just sit on a bench and wait for the dream to be over. I could do anything, yet I choose to do nothing. In the end, your achievements in the dream don't even matter after you wake up.

You seem to be quite intrigued with swordplay. Have you played For the Honor yet? I suspect you might enjoy it.

The whole world's economy is set on the basis of people wanting to get rich. It's that desire that usually drives them to work.

What fills your time now given that you're no longer as bored as you used to be? What changed?

The thing that I'm wondering is whether you even have a problem? Perhaps you're struggling so much with it exactly because the problem is unsolvable. You can't solve something that doesn't exist in the first place. Are you sure you even have a problem? During the day, you do stuff. What if this stuff is exactly what you're supposed to be doing? Perhaps, there's nothing for you to find out there. You've already found it. You're living it.

6408301
I don't understand what it is you imagine, regarding "living for your desires" and "living for a principle".

I used to be able to very well. it rarely happens now. generally, being "all-powerful" only removes challenges insofar as that particular game goes. ex. if you are so powerful that you can bake one pastry of extremely high quality, try baking 100 of them at once; you'll find that requires a different power. similarly, if you become so powerful that you can bake 100 pastries of extremely high quality, try instructing others on how to do so. omnipotence, however, eliminates those challenges, because theoretically you'd always have the power, so you'd have no chance to develop. not that I thought that omnipotence could exist in this world, anyway. in my opinion, it's just a word people use generally to mean "insurmountable/unstoppable". omnipotence isn't a possibility.

I've no specific interest in swordplay, although I could develop interest in it. I like competition and conflict in general, physical or otherwise. fist fighting, swordfighting, gunfighting, sex, modern war, futuristic war, fighting a battle, various aspects of managing a war, espionage, trade war, cheerleader war, verbal fight. I have heard of For Honor and decided that while I might like it, I'm not sure if it's something I'd enjoy. I could give it a try. even then, I'd enjoy it and then... that's thrown into the desire pile as a sated desire. no money to show for it

many people don't actually want to "be rich"; they have it in their mind as a passing desire. they don't think about the things it would take to have that amount and keep that amount, or what could be done to increase it. ex. "I'll win the lottery and quit my job!" is a common expression. they want to get rich in order to buy a nice car, nice clothes, etc. this is why they don't become rich, or if they do they don't stay rich. if I became rich upon finishing this sentence, even if I personally owned trillions of dollars, I might still wear clothes that have holes in them. the amount of possessions I have would only "double" or "triple" over night because I don't really have shit. no, what ultimately drives those people to work is that they want to make money.

don't know. I don't search for random knowledge as much as I used to. I don't try so hard to figure out games. I suppose some physiological changes may have played a role.

the problem is going from point A to point B seems to me to be a work of magic. and here I am, without a magician's wand.

6408385 When you live for desires you do what you want to do. When you live for principles, what you enjoy doing becomes meaningless because you put higher goals before your own goals.

As with the lucid dreams, I find it hard to just make out challenges for the challenges' sake. It's like playing a game with half of the screen covered up. It's a self-imposed frustration, not a challenge. I waste a lot less energy by just sitting about.

Could you enjoy playing games more if you had plenty of money?

If I were rich, I wouldn't be a spender, either. It would just be nice to know that I'll never be in danger of starving to death for the rest of my life.

Given that you spend less time in gathering knowledge and comprehending games, how come you got less bored with time and not more? And what are the physiological changes you speak of? Have you transitioned to your final form?

You say you want to go from A to B. Do you know what A and B are? Are you sure you're not already at the B?

6408427
yeah? and how does one feel after having accomplished them? if that provided some deep sense of well-being, it seems it'd be worthwhile. to some degree, I understand what it means to dedicate yourself to something. for example, if you're a soldier in your country's army, you may end up choosing situations where you put your life at risk in order to win or secure some great advantage for your cause, which can be seen as putting principles above your desires. but what you wouldn't do is throw your life away pointlessly. whatever action you take, it's for a reason. and if you can't fight for that reason, if you see it assaulted and you're unable to do anything to contribute to the fight, it'll hurt you emotionally -- even if all you cared about was being capable of at least attempting to uphold it. everyone considers themselves, even if they consider other things above themselves. if they didn't, they wouldn't even have the strength to live for a principle.

when I dream, I dream. when I live, I live. to me, dreams seem to be just brain exercise.

I don't understand the point of that question. I can enjoy playing video games now, with no income. I doubt I would be able to enjoy it while starving.

I understand the value of money and the current world we live in, but I still think that's a dangerous way to think: "if I have money, I won't have to worry about starving for the rest of my life."

I don't know. maybe I only stopped complaining about it. maybe "boredom" wasn't what I experienced. maybe I'm not "bored" because of newer people in my life. regarding the physiological changes, I think that I've had some sort of issue with testosterone. the easiest way to explain is to say that while my body definitely made plenty of testosterone, it didn't seem to be circulating for some reason. now, it circulates just fine. although, I stopped using that phrase long before I even realized this issue in depth.

if I were at point B, I would have an income doing something I enjoy and can expand and grow into something that could grant me even greater income. I'm sure I'm not already at the B.

6408525 I don't think it's necessary for someone to consider oneself in life. You could, say, have a person who wishes for death but doesn't commit suicide because it would be detrimental to the higher causes.

Dreams are kind of a brain exercise, except that you don't improve yourself in any way. I bet half the people would stop going to the gym if they learned that exercise has no effect on their physique. The motivation for training would be hard to come by. For that reason, I sometimes just prefer to wait until the dream finishes than to actively interact with the unreal world.

You play games from time to time, but your financial security is not yet, well, secured. It might be hard to focus on the now if you know that a problem looms in the future. That's why I asked if you'd enjoy playing games more if you didn't have to worry about the future.

Do you think money will become worthless in your lifetime?

Did new people in your life improve your life? Do you think one's happiness is bound to the people who surround one?

If income is your goal, have you considered going through a list of all possible jobs and rating them by how much you think you'd enjoy them?

6409160
if you don't, then how can you live for that principle? for the vast majority of things you want to do in life, it helps to be as physically and emotionally healthy as possible.

you can improve in dreams. at least, it's happened for me. back when I played fighting games, I'd practice variations in my sleep and learn things about those motions. when I wake up, what I've learned stays with me in reality. I imagine this works similarly for other things. it definitely requires you to have a strong grip on reality first, in some ways.

I understand now

I don't know the answer to that.

in ways, yes.

jobs, yes. all possible jobs, no. I've also attempted to look into creating work for myself, but I don't understand that process well.

6409376 Treating oneself to a minimum is good enough to keep oneself alive. The less time one wastes on oneself, the more time one has to devote to the chosen principle. Emotional wellbeing might not even play a role. One can just fake it until one makes it.

I guess dreams aren't completely useless. Still, I usually forget the majority of dreams soon after waking up. I feel that what I learn in waking state stays with me more permanently.

What kind of work would you want to create for yourself?

6409401
emotions affect the quality of actions. ex. if you need to be active and alert, sadness becomes a hindrance. I don't think that you can't fake an emotion until it becomes real, but I do believe you can fabricate the circumstances that cause you to experience them. you can ingrain specific actions within yourself, which can alter how you handle things, which alters the circumstances you receive, which can make you feel differently overall.

dreams keep your mind active. this is my theory, anyway. without stimuli, the brain atrophies. that much I'm aware of.

not completely sure, but what I said earlier listed its characteristics:

something I enjoy and can expand and grow into something that could grant me even greater income.