Golly! · 5:41am Dec 12th, 2021
I've been away from here for a while!
As a personal update, I've spent the last few months on clinical suboxone and it's unbelievably freeing. It feels like I'm finally able to make healthy decisions for myself after over a decade of just getting kicked around by drugs. Like, I cannot overstate how much this has helped me! I'm still going through a ton of therapy and stuff, but it's amazing to have human dignity again and not be laid out flat by my addiction.
I wish I could have made the decision sooner. I drove a lot of people away when I was at my worst, including many wonderful people I met here, and for the most part I know I'm going to have to continue to live with that for the rest of my life. But at least I still have a life. At this point, I've enlisted my boyfriend's assistance to make sure I never get involved in street drugs again.
The last time I posted anything significant was 2017 (I think), but I'm actually starting to be able to write consistently again. In addition to studying for my upcoming exams, I'm doing almost 5,000 words a day; possibly enough to make up for my severe perfectionist streak. The problem that I've been having for years is that nothing I write is ever good enough. Now that I'm actually approaching on a significant amount of time without all the excess chemicals floating around in my brain, I feel much better, and I'm getting better at writing again, too.
Not gonna lie, I've missed posting stories here. I had so many people who appreciated what I had to offer, and I never realized it. I was too busy whining about personal drama and seeking validation through drugs.
Anyway, I'm not going to set a date for anything I'm putting out. I really don't even have anything new to say, partly because I don't want to promise something and then disappoint people. But I have a few things that have been sitting around, and a few new things. Some of them are actually not complete grimdark horrorshows.
I hope I can deliver soon. I miss putting out new content.
Heya Para, long time no see. Glad to hear from you!
You deserve to be happy Para. Glad you finally kicked that shit!
Looking forward to your new content!
Ohai!
NICE
I'm glad to hear you're doing better. I hope it sticks with you.
Welcome back! Glad to hear things are going better for you.
This is good to hear. Congratulations, and good work.
Good to hear you're doing better, only the best to ya!
Recover first, write second. If writing is required for mental and emotional wellbeing, adjust priorities accordingly.
...yeah, I got nothing in the way of advice. Just well wishes and welcome backs.