Smile... · 4:43pm Dec 1st, 2012
There has always been one thing that MLP has given me, through show, pictures, and the fandom, and that has been smiles.
I don't know what it is about the show and the stories. Normally, through every day, I don't smile or laugh or really feel for that matter. I'm pretty much on auto-pilot, going through the motions of life, especially now when life has been so hard. But I've always had one solace: Ponies. Ridiculous as it seems, but everything about the show can bring a smile to my face.
Today, I am unable to smile.
Not long ago, I got some disturbing news. Money that was supposed to go to pay my car note just disappeared. This is already bad, because I have been out of a job for 2 months (I'll be starting one in just a few weeks), my bank has been in the negative, and I have no insurance to cover my car. A guardian angel, a friend of the family, has helped me while I've searched for a job, though. She has given me gas money as well as paid for my car note these past few months. So it was not my money that disappeared, it was hers. I hate it already that I have to rely upon her for so much, I hate it even more that this has drained her money. In my time of unemployment, I only wished to be as little of a burden as possible. But that's quickly backfired.
But this was the straw that broke my back. Even though my life kept kicking me while I was down, I had MLP to help me be cheerful. All I had to do was listen to a song, read a story, or watch just a few minutes of an episode, and a stupid happy grin would be plastered on my face.
Now, I've watched all my favorite episodes, listened to my favorite songs, and even revisited some of my favorite stories on here, but there's nothing. I haven't completely broken down, though. I haven't started to cry, yet, which is about as good as I can hope. Sorry if this is a big downer for you to read, but sometimes, nothing helps like writing or venting something to others.
I don't expect anyone to read this, really. But if someone does, thank you for taking the time to listen.
